by T. S. Ryder
"Here you are," Erica repeated. "And here I am."
They sat in silence, hands entwined, not talking.
"What are you thinking?"
Erica sighed. I'm thinking that it's time for you to stop punishing yourself. The only future in your current path is dying. I care about you. It would be very easy for me to love you. Scratch that, I do love you. It would be easy to dedicate the rest of my life to you. But I am not going to be a mercenary, and I am not going to be the kind of girl that waits for her man to come back from his missions, knowing that if he dies she may never know what really happened.
How was she meant to say that? Was she in a place where she could commit to Ronan, to the baby, to a life together, even if he changed his ways? And what sort of life would it lead them to? Could she really do the whole barefoot and pregnant thing? What about her career? Would he stay at home while she went to work and treated patients day after day?
"Thank you for telling me. I know it can't be easy." She squeezed his hand. "What are we going to do when we reach the planet Bethy's on?"
Ronan smiled. It looked like it was in relief. "We aren't going to do anything. You're staying here."
"I don't think so."
"It doesn't matter what you think."
"I told you—"
Ronan pressed a finger to her lips. "You were going to stay here even before the results came in."
"But—"
"No buts. You'll only slow me down. If you want Bethy back, you're going to stay in here and do as I say. I can't worry about protecting you while I'm in a potentially deadly position. And if I tell you to take the ship and leave, you are going to, whether I am back with Bethy or not."
Erica's heart lurched at the thought. Her eyes narrowed. She pushed Ronan's hand from her mouth. "No, I'm not. I'm not leaving without you and Bethy both."
"You'll leave, or I'll program the ship to give me a couple of hours before it takes off. Maybe I should do that anyway."
Erica pinched the bridge of her nose. "I can't change your mind, can I?"
"No."
"Then you should set a program. If it came down to it, I know I wouldn't be able to leave. And whether I like it or not, I am pregnant. It'll be easier for you to find Bethy if you know that I and the baby will be safe…" Her stomach roiled and she clutched Ronan's hand. Tears burned in her eyes. She was pregnant. She was really pregnant.
She wasn't certain what frightened her more–that there was a baby growing inside of her, or how much she loved it already. There wasn't room in her life for a baby. And if she loved it, then she would keep it… and what would she do then?
***
The planet was densely forested, with a sub-terrane system of tunnels and caves that were seemingly endless. Ronan had set the ship down near a water source. If the corporation had managed to see through the pirate's stealth technology, they would assume the ship was just stopping to refuel. At least, that’s what Ronan thought. Erica could only hope that he was right.
She was stuck on the ship alone now, while he was out there. As much as she wanted to go rushing after him, she knew her skills were better suited to giving medical attention when he returned.
She rearranged the medical supplies, putting the Bloodstore before the Fleshseal so it was the first thing she could grab. If Ronan returned badly wounded, then she would need to replace the blood he lost first. Her hands trembled, but she worked at keeping a cool head. Once he was back, she knew she could handle whatever mess he brought.
It was the waiting that was going to kill her.
The comm flashed. Erica activated it at once. "Ronan!"
A toad-faced Rlabek squinted at her. Erica took a step back unconsciously, quelling the disappointment rising in her. She smoothed down her uniform and raised her head. "Hello."
"You must be the human that Ronan has been traveling with. I am Dyme Lirreb."
"Ronan told me about you." A tremor shook Erica's hands. He had told her about the threats Lirreb had made, and how he was demanding the retainer he had paid back. "How did you know to call this ship?"
"I didn't call a ship, I called Ronan's contact line. Where is he?"
"Not available at the moment. May I take a message?" She tried not to show how hard her heart was hammering. It wasn't bad enough that Ronan was on this planet, sneaking into heavily-fortified buildings with the possibility of dying. Now this guy had to call?
Lirreb considered her for a moment before nodding. "Yes, you can. Tell him I want my money back within one standard week, or I will kill him. And maybe he doesn't care about himself that much, but I'll kill you, too… just for the fun of it. You think you can tell him that?"
Erica shivered. She knew if she tried to talk her voice would shake, so she merely nodded and ended the call. In silence once more, the paramedic looked around the medical bay. Yet another threat to work through. Yet another reason why keeping the baby and staying with him was a bad idea. Was anything going to go their way?
Let's see if we survive this first, before starting to worry about future death threats.
"Right." Erica nodded and looked over her supplies again. She had everything she needed here to take care of Ronan if he came back wounded. But what if he didn’t come back at all? "No. I can’t think like that. He's going to come back. He has to come back."
She was safe in the ship, it was programmed to leave if Ronan didn't return in four hours. But now that they were here and Ronan was out there, Erica's heart felt like it was about to break. She couldn't leave without him. Not even if that meant stranding herself here when she didn't know if he was alive or dead.
"He has three and a half hours left. I won't make a move until at least three hours have gone by. No use in going off to look for him when he's on his way back. I don't want to miss him. I don't want to miss him," she repeated, her voice trembling. "I just have to wait."
And wait she did. The seconds ticked by with agonizing slowness. Erica rearranged the medical supplies, then rearranged them again. She made sure the corridors were free of any obstacles. And just when she was beginning to put together a pack to take out with her as she went and searched for Ronan and Bethy herself, there came a harsh banging on the door.
Her heart burst in relief. Erica ran to let Ronan in.
Chapter Ten: Ronan
Ronan had found the base easy enough. All he had to do was listen to the planet, and follow the buzz of technology. No creature made a sound like that. Actually getting into the base had been a little trickier, but after he scaled a tree he had been able to climb through a window. Then came the truly hard part. Where in this massive building could he find a single human? Bethy could be anywhere.
Hacking into the computers proved fruitless. He found proof that the Walian Corporation was indeed attempting to hybridize various species, but there was no human listed in the database. That was a hopeful sign. It meant if they planned to use her as a test subject, they hadn't begun extracting her DNA yet.
Ronan searched every room he passed, all the while well aware that his precious time was ticking away. But he promised Erica that he would bring her cousin back. Even if he had to bring back a body, he wasn't going to break that promise.
The sound of voices in the corridor made him tense up. The T'shav quickly ducked behind a long countertop in the room he was in–it looked like some sort of surgery room. As the voices drew nearer, he could make out what they were saying.
"I was just looking to have a little rest from space!"
Erica's voice. His heart dropped to his stomach.
What had she done? Did she leave the ship? He should have seen that coming.
"I'm telling you, I just wanted to get out of space!" Erica's voice was rising. "What's the matter with you guys? Are you deaf?"
She was practically shouting. Ronan had to grin despite the situation. Clearly, she had gotten the thought that if she was loud enough he would hear her. Well, she wasn't wrong. The firm clip of boots passed by the door. Rona
n peeked from his hiding place. The corridor was clear, the sound of Erica's voice growing fainter. He slipped out and went to the door.
He saw two men on either side of Erica. One of them had his arm clamped around her forearm. Both were Ernesians. Hulking, hairy aliens that were almost extinct. They made for excellent guards, but T'shav were faster, stronger, and smarter. Ronan crept up behind them, moving silently as a shadow. He used the butt of his blaster to knock out the one that was dragging Erica before they even realized he was there. The second one took a fist to the face. The guard stumbled back, cursing fluently.
Erica dove out of the fight, rolling into a nearby room. The two guards tried to rally, but Ronan was on them, battering their heads again and again. The one got a good blow to his ribs, but it was over before it even really began. Ronan relieved them of their weapons. The one had a fine T'shav broadsword. Ronan wondered where he got it. He slung it over his back, kicking the Ernesian once more.
"These are ceremonial," Ronan grumbled. "No one but a T'shav should wield them."
"Ronan?"
The T'shav looked up. Erica was standing in the doorway. He sighed. "Why did you leave the ship?"
"Somebody came to the door and I thought it was you. I know, it was stupid, but we just have to find Bethy and get out. We have… we have to have half an hour left, don't we?"
"No." Ronan wrapped an arm around her waist. "I'm sorry. You come first. I have just enough time to get you back to the ship."
"I can't leave without Bethy!"
Ronan wasn't going to argue. He slung Erica over his shoulder and ran. There would be no climbing back down the tree he had come up on. Not while carrying Erica, and she didn't have the clawed toes that made scaling such a slick-barked tree possible.
He rounded a corner and found the way blocked. A tall Aphrosian woman, almost as bulky as a T'shav, stood in the center of the corridor. Aphrosians were a thin, willowy people. There was no way this was a natural occurrence. So the hybridization program was for super soldiers. A smile quirked the woman's lips, her blue skin gleaming in the light. She held twin swords, each with the distinctive pinkish color of traluthian steel, loosely in her hands.
"Stay back," Ronan said, pushing Erica behind him. He eyed the Aphrosian woman, his gun at chest level. She seemed completely undisturbed by the weapon pointed at her. "I suggest you get out of my way, Aphrosian, unless you want your brains to paint the walls."
"How do you know that it won't be your brains?" the woman replied, her smirk widening. "Do you think I'd just be standing here if a simple blaster could kill me?"
"Then why aren't you attacking already?" Ronan narrowed his eyes. "You're not a guard. You're a test subject. So are you hoping to check your strength against mine?"
"I was always the sickly child growing up. But now… yes. Yes, I would very much like to see how science holds up to strength and training." She shifted into a fighting stance.
Ronan couldn't help but grin. It had been a long time since he had had a real fight. He dropped the gun to the floor and drew the broadsword he had taken from the guard.
"What are you doing?" Erica shouted, but her voice wasn't alone.
Another human woman, a little smaller and thinner than Erica but with the same brown hair and snub nose, dashed down the corridor behind the Aphrosian. The blue-skinned alien threw her arm out, shifting from a fighting to a protective stance. Erica gasped.
"Look here, buster," the other human seethed, glaring at him. "You touch a hair on my wife's head and I will kill you!"
Ronan saw the alarm in the Aphrosian's eyes, but he shifted out of fighting stance. He put his sword away and laughed. "Bethy, I assume."
The Aphrosian looked startled, but Bethy was looking past Ronan by this time. Twin squeals echoed down the corridor as Bethy and Erica rushed towards each other. They met halfway between the Aphrosian and T'shav, hugging and crying and laughing.
"How did you get here?' Bethy asked. "Why are you here?"
"Ronan bought me from that 'bridal service' place and when I told him about you he agreed to help me rescue you." Erica tugged her cousin's brown hair. "What about you? What are you doing here? And your wife? I saw the man that bought you!"
"He's the head of the base. He bought me for his sister, Tag here. Tag had a genetic disease that was killing her, and the only way to save her was to hybridize her DNA. He was afraid that the experiments meant to save her would actually kill her, and wanted her to have someone to be with before she underwent the procedure." Bethy turned and beamed at the Aphrosian, who smiled back uncertainly. "Well, one thing led to another, and I fell in love. And what's the story with you and Mr. Tough Guy here?"
Erica glanced back at him. "We're… together."
"Wow, don't overwhelm me with details," Bethy said, putting her hands on her hips.
"Bethy, let's not pry." The Aphrosian stepped forward and put an arm around the human's waist. "I hope you haven't killed anyone, T'shav. If you have not, then I am sure that I can convince my brother to let you stay, so that our wives may be reacquainted."
Stay? Ronan opened his mouth to tell her that they couldn't stay, but Erica squealed again and threw her arms around her cousin. Her eyes sparkled and she had such a big grin on her face that Ronan felt his heart sinking. He hadn't seen her this happy since he met her. Could he really ask her to leave her cousin after finding her again?
But he couldn't stay. He was a mercenary, a rogue. There was no life for him here, and if he lingered too long in one spot, it might start feeling like home.
Home was dangerous. With home came responsibility and guilt.
"I can't stay," he finally said.
Erica's smile faded. "What do you mean?"
"I can't stay. You can, if that's what you want. I won't make or expect you to come with me, Erica. But I need to keep going. I have more jobs to complete. So I have to go as soon as possible. And right now I have to get back to the ship and turn off its takeoff protocols or we–I–will be stranded here."
He walked away.
Erica followed him. She grabbed his arm, making him stop. "You'll come back after."
Ronan wet his lips but nodded. He left without another word.
Chapter Eleven: Erica
The room that Tag's brother had given her wasn't fancy by any means. It was rather small, and even if the bed was softer than what she had grown used to, she hated it. With Ronan in the next room and not beside her, she might as well have slept on a rock. It had been Ronan to request that they sleep in separate rooms. He wanted her to have some space, so she could make her decision with a clearer head. That didn't seem to be working out so well.
Erica twisted the blanket in her hands, staring blindly in the dark. After she told him about Lirreb's threats, he agreed to stay one night so she could make up her mind. He would be leaving in the morning. She had just tonight to choose whether to stay here with Bethy and Tag or go with Ronan.
It wasn't fair! Why should she have to choose between him and her cousin like this? This was a Walian-controlled world, Planchet wouldn’t dare to come looking for him here, would they? They could stay and be safe. Or better yet, they could rejoin Zon's fleet. Even the most powerful corporations in the United Species were terrified of him because he had far more supporters than they could ever have. Supporters who would fight for him.
She turned on her side, her hand going to her stomach. There was this to consider, too. Ronan wanted the baby. She wanted Ronan. Could they find a way to make it work?
Bethy had done her best to convince Erica to stay. She told her about all the things that the base had to offer. Entertainment, excitement, a place where her skills would be useful. And Erica had to admit it sounded good.
But the simple truth of the matter was that she didn't want to leave Ronan. Plus Bethy had Tag now. Would she just end up as the third wheel if she stayed here?
She threw on a robe and slipped out of the room. Ronan's was right beside hers, and she knocked lightly
before keying the door open. The T'shav was sitting in bed, a holographic book on his lap. The story was projected into the air at the right angle and height for him to read. He turned off the book when he saw her.
"Erica, you should be sleeping."
She closed the door again and padded across the room, kneeling on the foot of his bed. "I can't sleep without you anymore."
He was very still for a long moment. Erica watched him, trying to guess what he was thinking. But with him that was impossible, so she crawled up the bed before straddling his hips and wrapping her arms around his neck. His hands rested on her hips.
"I can't sleep without you, either," he whispered, resting his head against hers.
"I can't make this decision without knowing something, Ronan. You were so happy when you saw I was pregnant. Do you want to be with me? To raise this baby together?"
Ronan stroked her hair from her face. "Yes."
"Do you want it enough to face your demons and return to Zon's fleet?"
A shudder moved through his body. He was silent for so long that she feared he wouldn’t answer. Finally, though, he brushed his lips against hers and nodded. It was all Erica needed. She kissed him back, gently at first but with growing fervor. Ronan's hands tightened on her hips, his body tensing as his fingers dug into her.
With a sigh, he relaxed again. His fingers traced her spine, his touch light, soothing. Erica moved her mouth to his jaw and neck and he sighed again. An intense feeling of connection build inside her as she explored her lover with her hands and mouth, tracing the lines of his body, feeling him shiver under her touch. He was giving her control, and that more than anything told her exactly what she needed to know.
"Let's get this off," she whispered, unfastening his pleated kilt.
He lifted his hips to help her but otherwise was as complacent as a kitten. When she met his eyes he smiled, dimple flashing, and a surge of heat built in her core to match the warmth spreading from her heart. Moving slowly she undressed herself, watching with building excitement as his eyes trailed down her body, lingering here and there before returning to her face.