Adrian restrained the urge to elbow him. Hard. What did that have to do with anything?
Holly’s brow furrowed. “Well, you may want to consider talking to her. She could provide insight. Maybe she had a hard time conceiving you, and that information would be very helpful in creating a treatment plan.”
The dread bubble in Adrian’s stomach grew larger at the thought of having to talk to her mother. She wasn’t ready to face that demon, let alone talk to her.
“When was your last physical?”
“About a year ago,” Adrian replied, thankful to move on.
“We should start there. Let’s run a full blood panel on you to see if there isn’t an underlying issue that could be causing the difficulty conceiving. But I’d encourage you to talk to your mother and see if she has any information that could help.”
“That sounds great.” Brad stood. Adrian noticed beads of sweat pooling around his brow. What had gotten into him?
“I know this can feel like a lot, but we’re in this together now, and I’m committed to helping you two have a baby.” Holly reached her hand across the table and grabbed Adrian’s. Her fingers were ice cold.
“Great, so we’re done here?” Brad said.
“Clearly, you are,” Adrian said. She made her blood panel appointment for later that week, and Holly reminded her to fast for twelve hours prior to it. Adrian thanked Holly for her time, and they left, Brad practically bolting for the door. Seething, Adrian prepared for a tense drive home.
Uncomfortable silence hung heavy between Brad and Adrian as he drove them home. Adrian started to speak several times but stopped, unsure of what to say. One thing was certain—Brad wasn’t being honest. Maybe he’d changed his mind about having children and was afraid to let her down. The nagging feeling prodded her to speak. “Is everything okay?”
Brad sighed. “Honestly, no. I don’t think this is going to work, and we should call it.”
“But we haven’t even tried yet. You heard Holly. We need to rule out other causes before—”
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about us.” His voice cracked.
Adrian’s jaw slacked. “What are you saying?”
He paused. “I think I want a divorce.”
His words sucker punched Adrian. Her head spun and she saw stars. Divorce? Where was that coming from?
She looked out the window at the blurry lines on the road as memories flooded her vision. The fundraising event where they’d met—the one Laura had dragged Adrian to in spite of her protest of wanting to stay home. The silly date Laura bought for Adrian with Brad “for charity,” despite Adrian not looking for a relationship and not interested in glorified prostitution, charities be damned.
Laura re-telling the story at her wedding as Adrian rolled her eyes and laughter filled the room.
The first time Brad said he loved her. His tender kisses on her forehead.
Making love on the beach in Punta Cana during one of her sales award trips.
The way he used to keep her awake with his snoring, but how she could no longer sleep without the noise.
How he wrapped her in his arms to keep her warm when the temperature dropped below 70.
The excitement when they moved into their house, quickly agreeing which room would be the nursery.
Their honeymoon in Cabo, where they spent the entire trip in their room exploring every curve of each other’s bodies. She’d told Brad she wanted to go back at some point and actually experience Mexico, but life got in the way and they never made it.
Now they never would.
This couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t her life. This wasn’t reality.
She could see Brad in her periphery, waiting for some kind of response. She thought about how his habits had changed in the last six months when he started his new job. He’d brushed it all off as pressure from work, and he worked later and later, some nights not getting home until well after nine. She’d never thought anything of it and always took him at face value. Was he lying that whole time? How could she be so stupid?
“Adrian?”
“Is there someone else?” She really didn’t want to know. She knew better than to ask a question if she wasn’t prepared to hear the answer. But she already knew. That had to be what he was hiding. The shark lurking beneath the surface, pulling her marriage down by its meaty calf dangling in the water.
“That…doesn’t matter.”
“Wow, seriously?” She crossed her arms over her chest, fighting back tears. Relief swept over her in the way it does when one hears the truth, regardless of its sting.
At least it was out in the open.
Knowing him, he probably loved the other woman. Who was she, anyway? She was probably some cliché, like a receptionist or bartender with long blond hair and big tits who loved sports and gave enthusiastic blow jobs. Adrian looked down at her small chest. No wonder.
The mystery woman probably didn’t have original thoughts, always going along with whatever Brad said or wanted to do. He probably ate it all up, thinking they had so much in common and how easy she made it for him. Clearly, Brad was having a mid-life crisis a little early.
Could Adrian fix it? Was therapy an option for them? Could she honestly consider forgiving his indiscretion? Her mind couldn’t keep up with the barrage, overburdened trying to process what had just happened. “Who is she?”
He swallowed hard. “That’s irrelevant.”
Time to face the music. He’d played the final note on their duet, and it was a sad one.
“Humor me, please?”
She thought about their wedding vows, how he’d promised to love, honor and cherish her as long as they lived. He’d been her rock that day. He’d whispered, “It’s us against the world, baby,” as they walked away from the altar as husband and wife. Not having her mother there, despite their strained relationship over the years, was really tough and Brad knew it. And now she felt stupid for believing him. “Brad?”
“It’s no one you know, okay?” He scratched the small patch of skin that covered his voice box like he always did when he was frustrated. She could typically read him like a book, but this was a twist she didn’t see coming. Did she really know him at all?
They sat in silence. She couldn’t wait to get away from him. Knowing he was having an affair made her feel exposed. The thought of being practically middle-aged and divorced made her cringe. “Can we at least annul the marriage?”
“Why?”
“It’s not for me. It’s for my mother.”
He scoffed. “You mean the one you haven’t spoken to in over three years?”
The last time she saw her mother was at her father’s funeral. She’d told Adrian she shouldn’t marry Brad. That she didn’t have a strong enough character to bounce back from a failed marriage. She’d rather die than face her mother with the news they were getting divorced. Death would almost be easier.
“That’s not the point,” she said, looking at the car next to them. A family in an SUV matched their speed in the next lane over, a blond girl with pigtails strapped into a car seat in the back. She locked eyes with Adrian and waved, beaming proudly as she clutched her stuffed panda.
“Adrian, did you hear me?” He touched her arm to bring her back to the present.
Adrian’s eyes grew wide as she glanced back at the road, unable to speak. He looked forward just as they collided with a semitruck that had swerved into their lane. In an instant, everything went black.
3
And then everything wasn’t dark anymore. A white void encompassed Adrian, leaving her unable to discern any surroundings. An overwhelming wave of love washed over her, eliminating any feelings of concern as it wrapped around her bodiless body. She realized the absence of her physicality in the void.
Did I die?
“Technically, yes, but it’s not quite your time.”
Adrian turned to see a little girl no older than six sitting on a bench. She scooted over, implying Adrian
should join her.
Adrian walked with trepidation to meet her greeter. The little girl didn’t move, patiently waiting. As Adrian approached, she noticed the uncanny resemblance between herself and her new companion. Her raven hair was braided in pigtails, but hazel eyes countered Adrian’s dark brown ones. As the girl smiled, Adrian noticed her mouth was different—fuller than her own. She wore a pink and yellow floral dress with white lace over the bodice, the colors so vibrant in the void.
“Please, sit,” she said, patting the bench.
“Who are you?” Adrian asked. “Are you God?”
“No.” She giggled. “He’s very far away from here.”
“Are you me?”
“No, but I guess you could say I’m a part of you.”
Adrian’s brow furrowed. “What does that mean?”
“Sit.”
Adrian complied, and they sat in silence. Her mind tried to make sense of the surroundings, including her almost-mirrored companion. Was she in Heaven? If this is all there is to Heaven, it’s boring as hell.
“You’re neither in Heaven nor Hell.”
How’d you do that?
I can read your thoughts.
Adrian crossed her arms over her chest, feeling exposed.
“This is a gateway—a crossroads, if you will.”
At the mention of crossroads, Adrian’s environment came into focus. Their bench was on a platform between two trains going in opposite directions.
“Ah, interesting choice.”
“I did this?”
“Yes, you are the creator of your Universe.”
Adrian didn’t believe her.
Try it.
Adrian pictured what she always imagined Heaven looked like: a waterfall with a misty rainbow, blue sky adorned with cotton ball clouds, and lying in a field of daffodils. The environment around them changed to match her thoughts. They were no longer on the bench in the train station but were lying in the field Adrian brought to life. She laughed in disbelief, feeling the daffodils tickle her arms as they swayed in the warm breeze.
“See?”
“This is amazing.” Tears of joy leaked from her eyes. She could get used to this, could easily make such a beautiful place her new home. Then she remembered the girl saying it wasn’t quite her time, and her stomach dropped. “I don’t want to leave.”
“The choice is yours, but you have more you could do on Earth.”
Adrian considered the statement, thinking about the things she still wished to accomplish. Her dream had always been to paint. Her father was a gifted artist, and the apple hadn’t fallen far from the tree. She was a natural with a brush in her hand but chose to climb the corporate ladder instead after her mother discouraged her artistic abilities. Your father is the artist of the family, her mother said as she pushed Adrian toward a sales career. If she stayed, she’d never get the chance to leave her artistic mark on the world.
“There’s more to it than just painting,” the girl said.
Adrian thought about Brad and where they’d left off prior to her waking up in this place. “Did he make it?”
She shook her head. Before Adrian could react, she felt a wave of compassion from her companion. It helped calm her emotions before they could manifest. Guilt bubbled to the surface in spite of that, as Adrian realized they’d never finish their conversation. Had she distracted him too much? That semitruck had, in fact, swerved into their lane from out of nowhere, right?
“Don’t doubt divine will.” The girl placed a tiny hand on top of Adrian’s. “Things always happen perfectly and at the perfect time, even when the mind perceives it as less than perfect.”
Her truth-filled words packed a punch. Adrian’s mind had a hard time perceiving such profundity from a girl who appeared to be no older than six. “So, what else is there for me to do?”
“Your mother needs your help.”
Adrian tensed, sitting straight up. Every fiber of her being, whatever her being was in that place, protested against the idea of doing anything for her mother.
“That’s all I can share with you at this point, but her fate, and yours, are relying on you.”
“I don’t think she wants my help.” Her mother never asked anyone for help and probably wouldn’t accept it from her, especially after everything that had happened. She felt the tickle of daffodils against her skin and grazed the petals of a nearby flower with her fingertips. “I haven’t talked to her in over three years, and my life’s been better for it.”
Adrian always envied friends who had solid relationships with their mothers. Her best friend Laura had a great relationship with her mother, who showered Laura with love growing up, encouraging her to be true to herself and chase her dreams. Laura’s dreams changed as frequently as her underwear at times, but her mother did nothing but encourage her imagination and wonder, supporting her even through making the wrong decisions. She’d offer motherly words of caution and wisdom but allowed her daughter the freedom to make her own choices and, often, her own mistakes, learning from them along the way. Laura and her mother were still very close. Adrian often wished she’d been Laura’s sister.
Unlike Laura, Adrian’s relationship with her mother had always been a struggle. Adrian often received words of criticism from her mother, making her doubt her choices. She got the impression she wasn’t overly thrilled to be her mom, pining for missed opportunities in a career cut short. On the other hand, her mother also seemed jealous about how close Adrian was to her father. But he was more of a nurturer. Adrian always wondered if she had been switched at birth. She couldn’t see any relation between herself and her mother, the tart vinegar to her oil. The only reason she didn’t insist on a maternity test was how much she had in common with her father, and her parents were sincerely devoted to one another. That and the striking physical resemblance between them, which probably saved them from strangling each other a time or two.
The girl shrugged. “It’s ultimately your choice, but would you truly be at peace with unresolved conflict with your mother?”
Damn if the six-year old wasn’t right. Part of Adrian had always longed to reach some form of common ground with her mother. She’d seen how good mother-daughter relationships could be, and if she stayed, the “what if” would eat away at her. If her marriage taught her anything, it was that everything bubbles to the surface eventually. She’d placed her issues with her mother on the back burner long enough.
Adrian sighed. “Okay, how does she need my help?”
“I cannot reveal that to you at this time, but you will find out soon enough.” The girl looked off into the distance, as if hearing a message from an invisible source. “It’s time for you to go back now.”
A wave of fear rushed over Adrian. She wasn’t ready to leave the perfect place. She’d never felt more alive, more loved, in her entire life. “I don’t know if I can.” Her voice was suddenly so small she didn’t recognize it as her own.
“God is always with you.” She peered into Adrian’s eyes with compassion. “Just remember him, and you can experience this feeling whenever you wish.”
“Will I ever see you again?” She felt a sudden attachment to her almost-mini-me.
“Before you know it.” She smiled, leaning over to kiss Adrian’s forehead. Adrian closed her eyes and felt like she was falling backward, a heaviness sinking in with her descent. Then pain.
Excruciating pain.
She couldn’t lift any of her limbs. Everything felt so heavy. She struggled to open her eyes and could hear the hum of equipment around her. As her eyes blinked, she saw fluorescent lights. The sterile smell of antibacterial ointment and rubber gloves tickled her nose. She was in a hospital.
She heard a concern-laced voice from somewhere in the room.
No, it couldn’t be. Could it?
Adrian groaned, and the voice stopped.
“She’s awake!” the voice cried out to the hospital staff. “Come quick! She’s awake! What are you doing just standing there?
Didn’t you hear me?”
It was definitely Adrian’s mother.
Why did she choose to come back again?
4
Margaret Russo sat in a sterile hospital room holding her daughter’s hand, willing her to wake up. The rhythmic beeping of machines assured her life still touched her daughter’s broken body, but she watched the steady rising and falling of her chest to be sure. Besides, technology could be wrong and was known to fail every now and then.
She’d remained steadfast by Adrian’s side for the last five days with no change. She’d ignored Laura’s invite to get a good night’s sleep at her house. She didn’t want to miss a thing, although her diet of coffee and stale pastry wasn’t going to cut it much longer. She knew she was in for a tongue-lashing from her doctor when she got home.
The doctors said Adrian would be fine. She’d been stable for three days but refused to wake up, as stubborn as she was. Margaret wasn’t above shaking her to bring her back if need be. She might have to resort to that if it were much longer. She’d rescheduled her next doctor’s appointment twice and couldn’t push it off again. She wasn’t thrilled at the idea of finding out what was wrong with her, but she needed to face that inevitable music. Until then, she’d enjoy her bliss-filled ignorance while she still could.
As she watched Adrian’s chest rise and fall, it reminded her of watching her breathe while she slept in a crib as a baby. Margaret had often resisted the urge to poke her until she cried to make sure she was still alive. She’d been terrified to bring her baby home and never felt those maternal instincts she was supposed to have. She’d felt incomplete as a woman, unable to relate to her friends who happily took care of babies and the household, always had dinner on the table by six pm, and never gave a second thought to a career.
She should consider herself lucky. A career wasn’t even an option for her mother, so the fact that Margaret had that choice was a blessing. But she’d gone and fallen in love with an artist, and someone needed to provide for them. And boy, did she fall. They were inseparable, thick as thieves, always supporting each other’s dreams and endeavors. They found it practically impossible to say no to one another, always finding a way to make things work through hair-brained schemes and eventual flops.
Unfinished Business Page 2