“Then, why did you kiss me?”
He closed his eyes, looking as if he were in pain. “Would you like me to escort you home?”
She snorted at the absurdity of the question. “That won’t be necessary.”
“Then, I must bid you a good day.”
With that, Lord Starsen left. Her mouth fell open at his abrupt departure. Something was definitely off about that man. She was determined to find out what.
~ ~ ~
Marcus cursed, then threw back another brandy as he paced his study, doing his best to ignore the pain in his leg. Besides, if he kept his current rate of drink, he wouldn’t feel the ache much longer. Yesterday had not been good for him.
His body too easily recalled the feeling of Lady Isabella’s small form beneath his. And, that kiss. It had been so long since he’d had so much contact with a woman, and the experience was something he couldn’t easily forget.
Settling down on the sofa, he covered his face with his hands. He had no idea what had possessed him to act on impulse with Lady Isabella. The poor girl had been afraid. Not only had he mauled her, but he’d held her down, like a common criminal. The feeling of her trying to dislodge her slender wrists from his grasp had made everything clear.
Dear God, it had been so bad, she hadn’t wanted him to escort her home. Most likely she had been afraid he would attack her again. He swallowed, mortification settling in the pit of his stomach. Somehow, he had to apologize. The problem was, he wanted to kiss her again. Wanted to experience the feel of her in his arms a second time.
“Are you ill, my lord?”
He snapped his head up and got to his feet at the sound of Miss Carolyn Ashford’s voice. Somehow, she managed to silently enter his study. If this was her habit, this month of her visit would become irksome.
“Just tired.” He forced a smile. “I didn’t sleep well. What about you? Did you have a pleasant night?”
She nodded. “I wondered if I could have a word with you.”
“Of course.”
She moved around his study, finally taking a seat on a nearby chair as he reclaimed his spot of the sofa. “As you know, your mother has invited me to stay with you before my season begins.”
“And, I extend the welcome.”
Her direct gaze didn’t give away her emotions. “Thank you. So, I assume you know her purpose for this invitation.”
“Yes,” he simply replied as he met her stare. Although he didn’t know the girl well, she was the sister of his good friend, who was now his brother-in-law. Often, Gordon made mention of the girl’s directness.
“Have you thought much on the subject?”
Resisting the urge to squirm in his chair, Marcus took a deep breath. He knew Miss Ashford referred to his mother’s plans to have him wed the girl. On one hand, he appreciated how simple it would be, and at one time, he would have welcomed the idea, but now . . .
An image of Lady Isabella entered his mind. He could never marry someone so wild and reckless, but he couldn’t wed another while she remained in his head. Somehow, he had to rid himself of thoughts of her. Once that was done, he would be free.
“The idea had crossed my mind. What about you?”
“Mine, too. I don’t require much. Just a home and a household to run. I would have that here. What are your requirements?”
Gazing into her closed face, he wondered at the girl. What type of woman would discuss such a subject so logically? Too many times, he’d seen women, like Annalise, who let their passions guide them. They would arrive at Avange Manor with a tarnished reputation and nothing left to recommend them. Miss Ashford, however, was completely different.
“I suppose I don’t need much, either. Clearly, I would need someone to run my household and provide an heir. And, she must get along with my mother. Other than that, there is nothing I can think of.”
A smile spread across her lips, but no merriment transformed her features. “Then, I would like to present myself for the position of your wife.”
Marcus swallowed. This was exactly what he’d been wanting for quite some time now. Not only was Miss Ashford passably attractive, but he could see a capableness about her. Their families already got along well, so he anticipated no objection there. However, something felt off.
“Let’s not be hasty. Why don’t we take this month to see if we will suit first? If, by the end of this time, we are both agreeable, we shall marry at the conclusion of the season.”
“Very well. I must admit, I’m glad to have that business out of the way.” She stood, and he did the same. “Please excuse me. I promised your mother I would help her with the embroidery.”
As the girl walked out of his study, he couldn’t contain his discomfort. At this point, he could consider himself as good as betrothed. The idea moved through his thoughts, but it was as if his mind rejected it. He wondered what Lady Isabella would think about the situation he found himself in.
Moving to sit behind his desk, he pulled out a sheet of paper. Over this time, writing to her had been very freeing. He could tell her of his thoughts without fear of judgment or repercussions. Of course, he never sent her those first drafts. Instead, he rewrote the correspondence and filtered out the more wild or inappropriate remarks. In the end, he always felt at peace with his submissions.
However, it was her turn to send the message, so this one would never be delivered. His hand flew across the page, not leaving out an ounce of his true feelings.
~ ~ ~
Later that day, as Marcus traversed the path through the woods, he couldn’t help the extra urgency in his steps. After the last time he’d seen Lady Isabella, he was anxious to read her missive today. Would she mention what happened between them? Would she demand an apology? Would she tell him she no longer had a desire to correspond? Not knowing was driving him mad.
As he approached the stream, his breath caught. Lady Isabella sat on a rock, leaning back on her hands as her face was lifted to the sun. She was a picture of ease. His heart raced as his body grew hot. He would like nothing more than to sit beside her. To run his fingers down the smooth, olive-toned skin of her arm. To press his mouth to her red, inviting lips. He knew how soft they were, what she tasted like.
He cleared his throat, partially for her and partially for himself. Her eyes snapped open, and she looked at him. Then, a smile spread across her kissable lips. He felt that smile shoot straight through him. Bloody hell, she was beautiful.
“Am I interrupting?” he managed to force out.
She shook her head as she slid down the rock to stand on the ground. “Not at all. I was waiting for you.”
His spine stiffened. “Is that so? Whatever happened to passing letters?”
“That’s part of why I wanted to see you. I don’t think we should write letters anymore.”
He sucked in a breath as he rocked back on his heels. So many words bubbled to the surface. This was because of his previous inability to control himself—he knew it. He wanted to apologize, or to beg her to reconsider, but instead, he remained quiet. This was just another lesson for him. Every time he acted on an impulse, he had to pay for his mistake. Resignation filled his mouth with a bitter taste. He simply wished his body would take the hint.
“I understand. Rest assured, you shall not be bothered by me again. I bid you a good day.” Unable to remain any longer, he turned to go.
“Wait, my lord. That is not what I meant.”
Confusion wrinkled his brow as he turned around to face her. “What do you mean?”
“The letters have been wonderful. I learned a number of things about you. Or, that’s what I thought, until yesterday.”
“Yes.” He cleared his throat, knowing what was coming. “Please accept my apology. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
She tilted her head to the side. “Why did you do it? I stayed up a large portion of the night wondering the answer to that question.”
The idea that she’d lain in bed thinking about kissing him broug
ht in ache to his groin, and he shifted his position to relieve the pressure. “I’ve already apologized. I don’t know what more you need.”
“I don’t want you to be sorry.” She stepped closer to him. “I want to understand. I’ve never known you to do something so unexpected or impulsive.”
“That is because I abhor doing anything without weighing the consequences.”
“Sometimes the consequences are worth the act.”
His gaze fell to her lips. “Occasionally.”
He couldn’t help but agree with her. Even now his body was demanding he taste her again, the consequences be damned. And, that was exactly why they needed to keep their distance. Well, except for penning missives. For some reason, he wasn’t ready to completely sever that connection.
“Then, I will ask you again. Why did you kiss me?”
It was hard to think with the heat of her body nearly singing him and their subject being exactly what he was craving at that very moment. “A momentary lapse.”
Those delectable lips curled up into a triumphant smile. “I didn’t know you had those. I do wonder how often they occur.”
His eyes widened, and he took a step back to clear his head. “Lady Isabella, are you asking me how many women I’ve kissed? That isn’t exactly an appropriate question.”
She laughed. “No. That’s not what I was asking, but now that you mention it, I wouldn’t mind hearing the answer.”
The sensation of the color leaving his face made him lightheaded. Although in recent days he had admired her outspokenness, today was an exception. Having her attention focused on him made all the difference.
Her laughter increased. “Maybe another time. For now, I’m wondering after your impulsiveness. The knowledge that you—of all people—act upon it, fascinates me.”
Lifting one brow he studied her. “Why is that?”
“In all these years that we’ve lived so close and seen each other on numerous occasions, I would never have imagined that you would kiss me.” She licked her lips. “Or, that I would want you to.”
Shock ran through his mind. Did she just admit she wanted him to kiss her? The wildness inside him rejoiced and begged him to give her what she wanted. It would be so simple to close the distance between them and take her in his arms. His hands shook with the exertion of keeping himself back.
“Then, I suppose it’s a good thing I don’t often act on these tendencies.”
Disappointment crossed her face for a second before she cleared it, putting an emotionless mask in its place.
“And, you are exactly what I always expected, therefore, we have no reason to continue exchanging letters or engaging in any other form of communication.”
A stone settled in his stomach at her words. That wasn’t what he wanted. Unfortunately, he couldn’t confess what he desired from her as he couldn’t name it even to himself. All he knew was that he wasn’t ready to end this. Writing to her had given him something he didn’t know he needed.
“That is probably for the best,” he grudgingly uttered. “However, I must admit I have grown fond of exchanging letters. What would it take for you to reconsider and continue to write to me?”
She pinched her lips as she studied him with narrowed eyes. “I’d like you to do one impulsive thing every day. You can either write about it to me, or have me along for the occurrence.”
A silent war waged inside of him. The idea of doing something reckless or wild appealed to him more than he wanted to admit. It was the fire that had driven him as a youth, and refused to release him even as an adult. His rational side reminded him how dearly he had paid for his actions in the past.
Then, he thought about the kiss he shared with her. That impulsive action had led to her offer today. She wanted to spend more time with him because of the kiss, not in spite of it.
“Would agreeing be considered my one act for the day?”
Her wide smile showed off perfect, white teeth. “Certainly. Unless you wish to kiss me again.”
He swallowed. Dear God, he did. However, if the last one was any indication, it wouldn’t be enough. He would want more. Hell, he already wanted more.
“I believe I’ve been sufficiently impulsive today.”
“Very well.” She turned around and started toward the direction of Midcliffe. “Oh, my lord?”
“Yes.” He hated the excitement in his voice.
“I can’t wait for tomorrow.”
With that, she swiftly moved into the cover of trees. Anticipation snaked through him, and he had to bite down on his teeth as a way to contain it. This little game they were playing appealed to him more than he cared to admit.
As he made his way back home, he wasn’t surprised in the least to discover he couldn’t wait for tomorrow, either.
Chapter 5
“Isabella!” her half-brother’s bellow shook the very foundation of the house.
Cringing, Isabella made her way to the hallway to Henry’s study. She hated when he got into one of these moods. Although she’d never been one who overly worried about what other people thought of her, the staff didn’t need to be aware of her half-brother’s displeasure.
When she slipped into the study, she didn’t make eye contact with Henry. However, she could feel his glower on her, regardless. The man wasn’t known for keeping his feelings to himself.
“Do you have something you wish to tell me?” His voice was hard.
Sparing a glance toward his desk, Isabella confirmed that her letters hadn’t been found. She let out a grateful breath then sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. Although confessing awarded her with a lighter punishment, it also made her more likely to confess the wrong thing and suffer for an additional transgression.
The silence stretched. Apparently, he intended to wait on her.
“No. And, as I’m sure you’ve heard from Raymond, I have been very obedient.”
He scoffed. “I wouldn’t call evading your escort an obedient action. Nor did it escape my attention that you somehow managed to leave your locked bedchamber. I have half a mind to release the entire staff in order to get rid of your accomplice.”
Although he’d made the threat before, it didn’t stop the feeling of dread from piercing her. One day he may actually act upon it. She couldn’t bear the thought.
“I’ve told you, no one has aided me. The staff has completely given you their support. Please don’t punish them.”
“Then, you agree that you need to be punished?” He shook his head. “You enjoy it. You prefer a man to take you in hand. I’ve never known a filly who enjoyed being broken.”
Her spine stiffened. “I’m not a horse. Nor do I enjoy your punishments.” She wanted to continue, but respected him too much to speak her full mind.
“Then, why must you force my hand?” Exasperation seeped from his every word. “Don’t you think I would prefer us to be at peace? We could spend countless hours in each other’s company with nothing but smiles and kind words to share.”
She let out a long breath. “I would like that as well.”
“If you truly feel that way, then tell me why the Earl of Starsen visited me today.”
Her eyes widened, and she barely managed to stop before her mouth fell open. “Lord Starsen visited you today? Why?”
Suspicion danced across his face as he studied her. “I do believe it was I who asked you that question.”
“I have no idea why you think I have the answer.”
“His business could easily have been handled by a servant. As I have never declined one of his very few invitations, I see no reason why he would need to personally see to our acceptance.”
“He came to deliver an invitation himself? To what? Why would he do that?” Confusion wrinkled her brow.
Surely Lord Starsen knew Henry should be kept out of their dealings. Had his intent been to warn her half-brother about how she’d disobeyed him? The thought made her sick. Then his kiss was, what exactly? A consolation prize?
“As I see that you are just as confused by this as I am, I trust you have not intentionally put yourself in the earl’s path. Now, we must ensure his attention moves beyond you.”
“I don’t know that I have his attention upon me. The man greatly disapproves of me. Now, what is this event we have been invited to?”
Henry fell back in his chair, allowing Isabella to sit as well. “It’s a picnic. Apparently, Lady Starsen has decided her son needs help finding a bride, so she has invited one to live with them. No doubt she hopes the earl will have the girl on her back before long.”
“Henry!” she chastised. “You must not say things like that.”
Biting back the sick feeling that the image provided her, Isabella tried to keep her thoughts off her face. Why had the earl not mentioned this to her when they spoke? The harsh truth was that his marriage prospects were none of her business. After all, Lord Starsen had no intention of offering for her. Nor did she want him to.
Her half-brother shrugged. “I speak the truth. Regardless, he hopes to introduce the girl to nearby ladies to ease her visit here. Perhaps that is the first step in his plans to trick her into marrying him.”
She wanted to disagree, but nodded instead. “It makes sense. What better way to entice her to accept his suit than to offer her a range of friends to make her feel at home.”
“Let’s just hope his choice of you is for convenience, not a way to get you to come to his house more often. Last season, your visits there for that baron tested my patience.”
“It wasn’t for him. I told you my only reason for going to Avange Manor was for Annalise.”
His lips formed a tight line. “We don’t need to have this discussion again. In two days, we will be attending the picnic. You are dismissed.”
Raymond shadowed Isabella’s steps as she left Henry’s office and headed out to the garden. She couldn’t stop thinking about Lord Starsen. And, his decision to come to Midcliffe.
Ensnaring Lord Starsen Page 6