by Daris Howard
He hadn't even finished his sentence before Edward and John started laughing again. Edward curtsied and did his best imitation of a girl's voice. "Why don't you teach her how to bake a pie, keep house, and be little Miss Domestic while you are at it?"
John grinned. "He'll be lucky if he can teach her to quit fighting and wear a dress."
Edward chortled and slapped John on the back. "Wear a dress! That's a good one."
Jacob was not in the mood to be teased. "Hey, look! This wasn't my idea."
Edward became quiet, motioning them close, and whispering as if telling a secret. "I've got an idea. The queen secretly hates you."
"It sure looks that way," Jacob agreed.
John patted Jacob on the back. "Maybe she's setting you up for failure so she can feel good about firing you."
Edward and John grinned, and Jacob even smiled.
"She ought to just fire me now and put me out of my misery," Jacob said.
Edward shook his head. "But then we'd miss all the fun watching you."
"How long do you have to do it?" John asked.
"One year," Jacob replied. "I'm supposed to have her acting like a princess for her eighteenth birthday celebration next year."
John and Edward both burst out laughing again. John wiped his eyes as he tried to control his mirth. "Acting like a princess. Dancing. That's rich."
Edward pretended to whack Jacob across the face. "I bet she slaps you or kicks you in the shins the first day."
"I bet within the first hour," John added.
"First minute," Edward countered.
"First..." John started to say, but was interrupted by Jacob.
"All right, All right. I appreciate you guys being such a source of inspiration."
Edward grinned. "We try."
Jacob thought that if they were trying any harder, they would be selling concessions at his hanging, but he didn't say it. "I guess I better be going. I'm supposed to be there right after breakfast." Jacob turned to head to his quarters to prepare himself.
"Good luck. You'll need it," Edward called after him, as he and John almost collapsed in laughter.
Jacob knew he had about a half hour before he had to meet with the princess. What was he going to do? He thought and thought about it. Everyone knew what she was like. She was, in very simplest terms, a brat. What else could anyone say? She had been that way for almost as long as he could remember.
Sure, he could recall when she was small and cute, but then she just seemed to change. She kicked at everyone, she fought with the pageboys, and she got in the road as he tried to work with his men and the horses. What could a person do? She was the princess. He couldn't tell her to get out of the way or give her a good spanking like she deserved.
Jacob could feel his blood starting to boil. What kind of an assignment was this to give to a military officer? He had to keep reminding himself that he had taken an oath of loyalty to the queen when he became a member of the Royal Guard, but he felt this was so unfair. How does a person go about tutoring a princess? How does one go about tutoring any girl for that matter? He had never truly worked with anyone but his men. Sure, there were his older sisters, but he had never met any woman like the princess. His last run-in with her was while he was at the Royal Stables.
He had been afraid she would get hurt and had asked her to move away, and she kicked at him. He was able to jump out of the way, but he could remember how angry it made him. He thought, if it was up to him, he would have spanked her right then and there.
Then he thought about what the queen had said. The tutoring of the princess was up to him, and he need not fear about his assignment because of the princess. Perhaps that was exactly what the queen wanted. Perhaps she wanted him to train her like he had trained his men. After all, what other kind of training did he know?
Then he had an idea that was so sweet that it was almost deliciously wicked. He didn't know if it was wicked or not, but it made him happy. What if he did treat her like he treated his men, and she went to her mother and complained? Her mother might remove him from being her tutor. He smiled at this glimmer of hope. That was what he really wanted anyway.
Then he thought of something else. He had to command his men, almost all of them older than he was. If he didn't keep some kind of military demeanor, what kind of respect would they have for him? The more he considered it, the more he decided his only real choice to do any work with the princess was to treat her just like one of his men. What did he have to lose? If she learned some respect, then good, he was doing his job. And, if the queen removed him from being the princess's tutor, he won that way, too.
He wasn't sure where to start, but the time had come. He steeled himself and headed to the palace library. He would have to play this one as the cards fell and see how it went.
Chapter 16
Tutoring A Princess
The library at Winslow was one of the biggest in the kingdom. It was a beautiful, three-story room, open in the center all the way up, with balconies all away around the room on the upper two floors, making it easy to reach the books. Stairways at each end of the library led to the balconies. Large windows on each floor flooded the room with light. The bottom floor boasted a large fireplace. On each side of the fireplace was a royal family crest with real crossed swords through them. There were two tables, one on each end of the library, leaving the center open and airy. The whole room was warm and inviting.
Lord High Chamberlain paced back and forth in the room, stopping at times and drumming his fingers nervously on the table. When he heard the door open, he turned around. Princess Marie sauntered in, dressed in her usual pageboy-type clothing. She was munching on an apple and acting like she didn't have a care in the world. She dropped into a chair and crossed her feet on the table as she spoke with her mouth full of food.
"Hey, Matty, what's happening?"
Lord High Chamberlain sighed heavily. "I wish Your Highness would address me as Lord High Chamberlain, or at least, Matthew. You're not the queen yet."
Marie took another bite of apple. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever."
Jacob stepped into the room and could see that Lord High Chamberlain was talking to Marie, so he stood quietly as Lord High Chamberlain continued.
"And Your Highness is not wearing a dress. You are the only girl in the kingdom that does not wear a dress. I know your mother has asked you many times to wear one."
Marie sprayed apple flakes all over the table as she spoke. "If you like 'em so much, you wear one." She chewed a moment, and then continued. "So what did you drag me down to this dungeon for?"
Lord High Chamber spoke with reservation, trying to hold back his disgust. "This is not a dungeon. This is the library."
Marie took another bite of apple. "You pronounce dungeon the way you want. I'll pronounce it the way I want."
"Your Highness, your mother, the queen, has asked me to be the one to remind you that one year from today is your Royal Princess Ball."
Marie rolled her eyes. "How can I forget? She reminds me every day."
"She has something very special for you."
Marie excitedly stood. "A birthday present!"
"Well, yes, of sorts."
Marie began to get suspicious. "It better not be a dress."
"No. It's not a dress."
"Good. What is it?"
"It's a... Well, it's a..."
Jacob smiled from his position behind Marie. It was fun watching Lord High Chamberlain become flustered, struggling for words. He was usually so calm and composed, but the young princess seemed to have that effect on almost everyone.
Marie was getting frustrated. "What?"
Lord High Chamber gulped nervously. "A tutor."
"A tutor!" Marie let the last of the apple fly in the direction of the Lord High Chamberlain. He moved his head just in time, and the apple continued its flight across the room, splattering into some books on the shelf. Marie deliberately stepped to the book shelf and pulled off some books. "She go
t me a tutor!" She threw a book at Lord High Chamberlain, who ducked out of the way, letting it hit the floor and slide to the fireplace.
"You mean a babysitter!" the princess yelled, as she let another book fly.
Lord High Chamberlain nimbly avoided the book and bowed slightly, barely hanging on to his composure. "No, Your Highness. A tutor."
Marie stepped menacingly toward him, ready to throw another book. "I am seventeen! I do not need a tutor!"
"Nonetheless, Your Highness, your mother has procured a tutor to help you prepare for your Princess Ball next year."
Marie threw another book, which Lord High Chamberlain artfully dodged. Her voice was almost to a screaming pitch. "She has gotten me another person to try to make me wear dresses and act prissy and stupid! I will soon get rid of her! Who is she?"
Jacob had walked up silently, cautiously, behind the princess. As she brought the last book in her hand back to throw it, he quickly grabbed it and jerked it from her. As she threw her empty hand forward, realizing what happened, she spun around and fixed a glare on him. He smiled and bowed graciously.
"She is me, Your Highness."
Marie scowled. "You! A soldier is to be my tutor? What kind of a joke is that?"
Jacob sighed. "A horrible one, I can assure you."
"What can you teach me?"
Jacob gently set the book on the table. "Respect for books, first off."
While Marie had her attention elsewhere, Lord High Chamberlain seemed to see this as an opportunity to end this unpleasant task.
He smiled what Jacob thought was both a sly and grateful smile. "I think I will leave you two alone to get better acquainted."
Marie watched him leave and then turned her attention back to Jacob. "You men are all such arrogant slobs. A book is just a book."
Jacob picked the book back up off the table. "A book is a means to greatness, learning and literacy."
"I am as literate as anyone."
"Sophocles said, 'Wisdom outweighs any wealth.'"
Marie wrinkled her brow. "Who?"
"Sophocles."
"Who was he?"
"He was an ancient Greek playwright," Jacob answered.
Marie rolled her eyes. "What do I care what some stupid ancient Greek said?"
Jacob could feel his patience dwindling at her arrogance and the thought of his assignment. He was barely able to stay calm as he answered. "He is saying there is no greater possession than wisdom. Being literate is more than knowing how to read and write. It is the ability to think and reason wisely."
Marie jumped to the book case and pulled off some more books. "Are you inferring something?"
"A person's wisdom is shown in his or her actions," Jacob replied.
"How dare you!" Marie screamed, and threw a book at him.
Jacob easily dodged it, still determined to keep control of himself. "Well, at least teaching you how to defend yourself won't be too hard, as long as you have plenty of books."
Suddenly, Marie seemed excited and put the other books on the table. "Defend myself?" she asked.
Jacob nodded. "Yes, your mother said one of my assignments is to teach you to defend yourself."
Marie pointed at the sword at Jacob's side. "With a sword?"
"I suppose."
"All right! That you can teach me," she said excitedly.
"I am also supposed to teach you about philosophy, music of the masters, dancing, and how to be a lady."
Marie smirked. "You, a man, are supposed to teach me how to be a lady? Ha!"
Jacob felt his anger swelling. "At this point, I think I know more of what makes a lady than you seem to!"
Marie's eyes grew wide with anger. "How dare you speak to me that way! I will have you sent to the frontier for such insubordination."
"If only that were possible," Jacob said. "I'd rather that than this. But your mother, the queen, has given her command and said you cannot undo it."
Marie looked him directly in the face, as if checking his words. He didn't mince, so she decided to continue with what she wanted. "If that is so, then you can teach me to fight. I will get a sword."
As she turned to the wall with that contained the family coat-of-arms, he grabbed her arm. "You don't fight with a sword first. You learn to defend yourself without one."
Marie swung around quickly and slapped his hand away. "How dare you touch me. I am a princess."
Her haughtiness and Jacob's frustration was finally too much for him. "A princess? Ha! You're not a princess! You're not even a lady!"
Marie turned to slap him, but he knocked her arm away. He was tired of her attitude and angered by this assignment. If she was one of his men, he would have taught her some respect by now. He continued. "A princess is more of a princess in how she acts than how she's born. You may have been born a princess, but you don't act like one."
Marie attempted another slap, and he grabbed her wrist. She tried to slap him with the other hand, and he grabbed her other wrist. She tried to kick him, and, as she did, he gave her a shove, knocking her on her backside.
Marie jumped to her feet, screaming. "I'll see you sent to the frontier for the rest of your life for this!"
Jacob didn't even try to hold back his disgust. "Promises, promises, promises."
Marie ran to the wall and jerked a sword from the family crest, spinning to face him. "I'll teach you!"
She rushed at him. Jacob pulled his sword and deftly swept hers from her hand. She quickly retrieved it and attacked him again. He flicked his wrist and sent her sword sliding across the floor once more. She picked up her sword again, and more cautiously approached him. At the last instant, she attacked. Again, he took a little step, and flipped his wrist, and, again, her sword skidded across the floor.
Jacob shook his head. "You've got a lot to learn."
Marie looked at him respectfully. "Can you teach me how to do that?"
"Perhaps, but only if you will listen."
Marie was much subdued. "All right."
Jacob seemed pleased and sheathed his sword. "Let's make a deal. I will teach you swordsmanship if you will, in turn, at least pretend to listen to the other things your mother said I must teach you."
"Only if you don't get preachy."
Jacob bowed. "I'll try not to, Your Highness." He offered his hand to shake. "Is it a deal?"
She slowly, cautiously reached out her hand to him. She smiled and shook his hand. "Deal." She then slammed her foot into his shin and grinned. "I'm ready now."
Jacob bent down to rub his bruised shin. "I guess, maybe, I had that coming. That can be your first lesson. Be careful to always see everyone from their waist to their shoulders. Never just look them in the eye. The shoulders, hands, and waist always tell you their next move. And, most of all, don't trust any opponent."
She leaned down to smirk in his face, and he pushed her onto her backside on the floor. He grinned back. "I told you not to trust your opponent."
As Jacob stood up, Marie struggled to her feet. "Why, you..."
She doubled up her fist and took a swing at him, which he easily dodged.
He shook his head. "Your whole body is telling me what you're going to do. If you are going to defend yourself, you've got to do better than that."
She took some more swings at him. He dodged them and blocked them until she finally paused, panting. He looked her in the eyes. "Are you ready to listen now?"
Marie paused, catching her breath. She was much quieter. "All right."
Jacob stood directly in front of her and tapped his waist. "Watch my waist, and I am going to reach out and tap your shoulder. You see if you can swing your arm to block me, without taking your eyes off of my waist. Ready?"
Marie nodded. "Yes."
"All right. Here we go."
Jacob flinched his head to the right and she raises her left arm, as if to block his right, but he hit her medium hard with his left open palm.
"Ow!" Marie hollered. "You said tap."
Ja
cob shrugged. "So I lied. You were watching my head and not my waist. My waist would have told you my left arm was the one moving."
Marie glared at him. "You hit me!"
"An enemy would do more than that."
She doubled up her fist and swung at him. He blocked her blow and hit her on her opposite shoulder.
"Ow! You hit me again!"
Jacob nodded. "That's right. And do you know why? It's because you made another mistake. You let anger dictate your defense. Anger causes you to make mistakes. You must think, think, think!"
Marie was really angry now. She swung wildly. He blocked her fist again and again, each time hitting her on the shoulder with the opposite open palm harder than before.
"Ow!" Marie yelled as she grabbed her shoulder.
Jacob shook his head. "You are a slow learner."
Marie was breathing fast, she was so mad. "A man is never supposed to strike a lady!"
Jacob's eyebrows raised slightly. "Next time I meet one, I will remember that!"
Marie swung her other hand to slap him. Jacob again blocked it, hitting her shoulder with his open palm even harder still.
"Ow!" she yelled and grabbed her other shoulder.
Jacob sighed. "You are going to be really sore before you get this lesson down." He had to admit to himself that he hadn't come across many people as determined as the princess.
She moved to strike him again, then stopped. She looked him directly in the eye. They stood there for some time and Marie took some deep breaths, as if to calm her anger. Finally, Jacob spoke softly, but firmly. "Are you ready to try again?"
Marie nodded. Jacob bowed slightly. "All right. Put your eyes on my waist. I will move, and you try to block my movement."
They continued to practice all morning. Jacob quit hitting her so hard when she truly buckled down and practiced. Jacob was pleased that when she found out that he wasn't going to give in, she settled down and behaved. He thought there might be hope after all.
They stopped for tea at mid-morning. Neither knew quite what to say. Marie just glared at him. He wasn't sure what a person talks to a princess about, so he decided not to try. They both sipped their tea in uncomfortable silence. Then they continued to practice.