by Daris Howard
He took her hand in his. "I will escort you to the ballroom, where they will announce us. 'Princess Marie Elizabeth Antoin Rian Isabel Victoria' and 'Captain Jacob Richins'." She laughed at the way he said it, making his own name sound small and insignificant and hers too big. He continued. "I will then escort you down near the throne where the young men will each come and offer you their hand in turn, and you will dance with them. When the ball is drawing to a close, it is customary that you may save the last dance for he who has caught your eye. If any man offers you his hand you may refuse it on the last dance, if you desire, but on other dances, you politely accept each one."
Marie looked down. "What if the thought of dancing with them frightens me? What if they think I'm clumsy or ugly or..."
Jacob touched his finger to her lips to stop her. "They won't. You are beautiful and graceful." He then swallowed hard and felt a tear escape his eye, which he could do nothing about it. "You truly are a princess."
They looked at each other for a moment, each sensing the feelings of the other without a word being said. Marie lowered her eyes again. "But I'm still scared. I have never danced with anyone but you."
Jacob tried to lighten the mood for a moment. "If you are out there dancing, and you are nervous, just say to yourself, 'I bet I could whip this man in a sword fight,' and see if that doesn't give you confidence, because you probably could."
They both laughed, easing the tension. Jacob then looked at her again and spoke softly. "I wish I had something to offer you for your birthday, but I have nothing befitting a princess."
She shook her head. "Jacob, you don't need..."
"I know." Jacob unpinned a small pin from his lapel. "This is my most prized honor, though it is small. It was given to me by your own father when I won the swordsmanship tournament at age sixteen, competing to enter training for the Royal Guard and the academy."
"My own father?"
Jacob nodded. "You were quite young then." He paused, smiling at her, the emotion making his voice quiver. "He would have been so proud of you tonight."
They held each other's gaze for a moment. Jacob detected tears in Marie's eyes. He held up the pin. "Here, let me pin it on you." He pinned it on her dress. "There. It is small and no one will notice, but you'll know."
Marie looked directly into his eyes. "Know what?"
"That I..." Jacob paused, catching himself just in time. Without thinking, he had almost said he loved her. He was still only a soldier, and she was a princess. He smiled and continued, choosing his words carefully. "That I, too, am proud of you."
He could see in her eyes that she knew what he had meant to say and was disappointed he had not said it. They became aware of the music on the breeze, announcing the ball had started. Marie looked into his eyes. "Jacob?"
"Yes, Marie?"
"Do you hear the music from the ball?"
"Yes."
"Dance with me," she said.
Jacob felt a surge in his heart, and he didn't think he could do this. "But Marie..."
She looked at him, pleading. "Please."
He nodded and put out his arms. She moved into them, and they danced slowly around the room. The music was soft and beautiful. Jacob could feel the tears rolling freely down his face, and he was relieved there was nothing more than lamplight. All too soon, the song came to an end.
She made no move to pull away from him, but instead leaned her head against him. He held her tightly in his arms. She spoke softly. "Jacob?"
"Yes?"
"Promise you'll always be there for me."
"As long as you need me," he said as he held her tighter and then spoke quieter, as if only to himself. "As long as you need me."
Lord High Chamberlain entered and cleared his throat to make his presence known. The two of them broke apart and looked at him. He smiled kindly. "It is time."
Marie nodded, and Lord High Chamberlain exited. Jacob put out his arm, and she slipped hers through his, but before they took a step, she pulled on his arm so he was facing her, and she looked directly into his eyes. "Always?"
Jacob nodded. "As long as you need me."
They then turned and walked silently to the ball.
Chapter 27
The Assignment Is Finished
Jacob led Marie to the grand staircase of the ball room. He handed the announcer their cards. The announcer announced them as Jacob had foretold. He thought he might have even heard Marie giggle because it sounded so much like he said it would. He escorted her down by the throne. The queen was there, with Lord High Chamberlain by her side. Jacob bowed to them and Marie curtsied. The queen and Lord High Chamberlain nodded in return.
They turned to face the hall, repeating their bow and curtsy. As her escort, Jacob took the first dance. It had no sooner ended than a young nobleman was there, asking her to dance. As he led her to the dance floor, she turned one last time to look at Jacob. He bowed, then walked to the side of the hall and stood at attention, as was befitting a soldier in the Royal Guard.
He watched her dance one dance after another, his emotions churning within him, jealousy welling up in his heart. He hated seeing her dancing with other men when he loved her so much. He hated having to be there and watch this and feel the way he felt.
He knew he had to get away - far away. He could not stay here, not at this ball, not at this palace. He could not watch her fall in love with someone else. He just couldn't bear it. He knew that whomever she chose for the last dance would be expected to escort her, and that, above all, he could not witness. To see her escorted by someone else would tear his heart apart. He wanted to be gone before the ball ended. The only thing that kept him there now was the duty of his assignment.
He would see her glance at him, and he would try to smile encouragement to her, but the longer the night wore on, the more his heart hurt, until he could no longer smile and he could no longer watch her. He simply fixed his eyes on the floor. She truly was beautiful and graceful and he knew she didn't need him any more. If she had ever needed him at all, she truly didn't need him now.
He was so caught up in his thoughts and the hurt he felt that he didn't see the queen talk to Lord High Chamberlain, nor did he see her point at him. He didn't see Lord High Chamberlain approach him, or see him stop and stand right in front of him. Finally, Lord High Chamberlain cleared his throat, and Jacob looked up. Embarrassed at his lack of attention, he quickly bowed.
Lord High Chamberlain bowed slightly in return. "Captain, Her Majesty, the queen, would have a word with you."
"Yes, sir," Jacob said and numbly followed Lord High Chamberlain and knelt before the queen. "You would like to speak to me, Your Majesty?"
"Rise, Captain. Captain, one year ago today I gave you what I felt was a most formidable task, one which you were reluctant to accept, and one I was unsure you could accomplish. I think you, too, were unsure."
"Yes, Your Majesty."
"But Captain, as I watch my daughter tonight, I can see you have succeeded marvelously."
Jacob spoke slowly and carefully, trying to keep his voice from quivering. "As I expressed to the Lord High Chamberlain, I do not feel the success is mine. I feel that it was always part of the princess, and she just needed time to discover it in herself."
The queen smiled. "You are far too modest, Captain. I am very well aware of the surprise everyone in this palace has at the change in my daughter. No one is more amazed than I am. I feel you should receive something for your effort. I would like to advance you to the rank of a colonel, though you will stay Captain of my Guard."
Jacob shook his head. "Please don't, Your Majesty."
"Why not?" the queen asked.
"I would feel unworthy to receive an honor for doing something in which I felt the beneficiary."
The queen sat back and looked at him. "Is that so? You feel you are the beneficiary in tutoring my daughter?"
"Yes, Your Majesty."
She leaned forward and looked directly at him, with eyes that rem
inded Jacob so much of Marie's. "What would be your greatest desire, then?"
Jacob looked down as he spoke, unable to meet her gaze. "That which I desire most is neither mine to ask, nor yours to give."
A solemn look came across the queen's face. "I see. Is there anything you would ask of me?"
Jacob nodded. "Just one thing."
"Ask, and it is yours."
Jacob swallowed hard, then looked up at her. "I would like you to transfer me to the frontier."
The queen gasped and Lord High Chamberlain, who had his gaze fixed elsewhere, also turned to look at him. The queen voice emanated concern. "Do you know what you're asking?"
"Yes, Your Majesty. I feel it would be best if I leave here."
The queen leaned back, but kept looking directly at him. She said nothing for a brief moment, making Jacob feel very uncomfortable. When she finally spoke, it was as if she could see clear through him. "I see. You are in love with her, aren't you?" Jacob did not answer, but lowered his eyes. The queen continued. "Does she return your affection?"
"She is the princess. I am a soldier."
The queen frowned. "That is not the question I asked of you."
"It is not my place to even consider such things, Your Majesty," Jacob replied.
The queen looked at Lord High Chamberlain, then back at Jacob. "You are the Captain of my Royal Guard. With whom would I replace you?"
Jacob looked up at her this time. "My friend, Lieutenant John Hashner, has shown himself loyal and worthy. He would make a fine Captain of the Guard."
The queen paused in thought. Finally she leaned forward. "It is with great reluctance I will grant your request. When do you plan to leave?"
Jacob look up at her. "Right now."
"Right now! Before the ball is over?"
Jacob nodded. "Yes, Your Majesty. I feel it would be best. May I have your leave to go?"
The queen nodded. "You may. And may God go with you."
Jacob tried to smile. "Thank you, Your Majesty."
Jacob bowed and exited the hall through the back. The queen and Lord High Chamberlain both watched him until he was gone.
Lord High Chamberlain then turned to the queen. "I am surprised you let him go, Your Majesty. I thought you wanted Marie to... you know..."
The queen nodded. "Yes, Matthew." She paused briefly, as if deep in thought, then continued. "Matthew, have I ever told you about my courtship with Alexander?"
"I can't say that you have."
The queen smiled. "As that summer progressed he realized he was falling in love with me. He was of royal birth, but the least of the royal families, and he knew everyone expected me to marry someone else. Everyone, except, thankfully, my mother. He, too, left, feeling he must before his feelings did not allow him to. It was when he left that I fully realized how much I loved him."
"And that's when..." Lord High Chamberlain paused, not sure how to say it.
The queen turned to him and grinned in an uncharacteristic manner. "Yes. I went after him, of course, and, with my father's permission, I took that whole contingent with me."
Lord High Chamberlain laughed. "That part I remember. I still can't believe you did that."
"But I did," the queen said, "and my daughter is much like me. I may be wrong, but knowing her stubbornness and what I am beginning to sense are her feelings for this young man, I don't think he will be gone long."
"So you are letting him go to test her?"
"More than that," the queen replied. "I think it will help her look into her own heart and see just how much she truly loves him and what that love is worth to her."
Lord High Chamberlain tried to hold a straight face, but his twinkling eyes gave away his mirth. "Knowing Princess Marie, I'm not sure I would want to be in his shoes if she does go after him."
The queen laughed. "Me neither, Matthew. Me neither."
Chapter 28
Leaving For The Frontier
As Jacob walked from the ballroom, he paused to say goodbye to his two friends. As he approached John and Edward, who were standing guard outside, they were surprised to see him.
"Captain!" John exclaimed, "I thought you'd be staying for the whole ball."
Jacob shook his head. "No, John, I must leave."
Edward, too, was surprised. "Where are you going?"
"To the frontier," Jacob replied.
Edward gasped. "The frontier!? She assigned you to the frontier!? You spent the whole year taking care of the spoiled royal princess, and the queen assigns you to the frontier?"
Jacob felt a surge of emotion go through him hearing the princess referred to that way, though he knew his friend meant no harm by it. "I don't ever want to ever hear you speak of the princess in a derogatory manner again. That is an order. Is that understood?"
Both John and Edward nodded, as Edward spoke in a subdued voice. "Yes, Sir."
Jacob relaxed. "Besides, I asked her to send me there."
John's eyes widened in disbelief. "You did what?"
Shock was evident in Edward's voice, too. "But do you know how dangerous the frontier is?"
Jacob nodded. "I'm well aware of the danger. I just felt it was time for me to leave here."
They stood there quietly for a moment. John was first to grasp the situation. He spoke quietly. "You're in love with her, aren't you?"
Jacob did not even answer the question, but spoke in a commanding tone. "You must never speak of this to anyone. That is an order. Both of you."
Both men stood at attention. "Yes, Sir."
Jacob then spoke gently to them. "I will miss you, my friends."
"And we you, Sir," John said.
"Any idea when you might return?" Edward asked.
Jacob thought a minute, then spoke with conviction. "Perhaps when the princess marries."
"How soon do you leave?" John asked.
"As quickly as I can pack my things. I want to be gone before the ball ends."
Edward reached out his hand. "Goodbye, Sir."
Jacob shook Edward's hand. "Goodbye, Edward."
John reached out his hand, also. "Goodbye, Sir, and God be with you."
Jacob shook John's hand. "Goodbye, and thank you."
Jacob then turned and strode quickly away. John and Edward watched after him until he was out of sight. Edward turned to John. "He is a good man."
John nodded. "Almost too good."
Chapter 29
Finding Out About Jacob
Marie had asked Jacob to meet her in the library instead of coming to her room to escort her. If there was any way she could have gotten out of going to the ball she would have, but she was the guest of honor. She had wanted a last moment with him so she could draw on his strength. She often drew strength from him. His calm, gentle nature was in such juxtaposition to her own that she could feel his influence on her just by being in his presence. He had helped her become more than she could ever imagine.
As she had walked into the library, she sensed the heaviness in his heart. She knew he loved her, as she loved him, and she did not plan for it to end here. She had to get through this ball, and although her mother had only assigned him as a tutor and escort through the end of the night, she was not about to let him go.
As he had turned and looked at her, he smiled, though his eyes belied his pain. She had felt warm and comfortable in his love as he gave her the pin he had won, and she could not have felt any more that they belonged to each other unless they were married. But, then, he had said something that made her heart tremble, something she had yearned for in her own heart for months. He had told her her father would be proud of her. Jacob could not have known how much that meant to her. He had said he was proud of her, too, but she knew he had almost said he loved her. How she wished he could have said it.
As the music began to play, she asked him to dance with her. That was the main reason she had wanted to meet in the library. She felt that if she could have a dance with him before she went to the ball, she could make i
t through the night.
As the dance had ended, and he held her close, she could feel his chest shaking slightly and knew he was crying. She had wanted to tell him it would all be fine, to comfort him as he had done to her so many times, but somehow it didn't seem right. She had to get through this cursed ball, and then she could do something. After his explanation of the events that would occur at the ball, she did have at least one consoling thought, and that was that she would select him for the last dance.
The foreboding feeling that came over her that day of the attack in the library came back. She realized her biggest fear was the unknown of what she would do if she lost Jacob. He promised he would always be there for her as long as she needed him, and she knew she would need him forever.
The night had passed slowly for her. She kept glancing over at Jacob, and, at first, he smiled encouragingly at her, though his eyes told her of the misery in his heart. She had wanted to run to him, to take his hand, to flee into the night from the ballroom. She had felt so trapped.
She knew many of the men who asked her to dance, and she tried to be pleasant to each of them. She recalled that each had seemed to have great disdain for her only a year or so earlier when she looked and acted differently, though she couldn't totally blame them for that. Most of them were blue blood aristocrats and nobility, and she truly was sure she could whip any one of them in a sword fight.
But she couldn't whip Jacob, and for that, she respected him. She had continued to glance over at him, and after a time he kept his eyes on the floor. Oh, how she wanted to take him from this, not just for herself, but for him.
Instead, she felt like she was some object on display, like a china doll on a shelf, not a real person. Dancing with these other men felt so empty and distasteful. With Jacob, she felt real and alive. She could discuss and challenge him on many topics, and he would challenge her back. With these men she would find a controversial subject just to see if they would challenge her on it.
None questioned her; they just nodded in agreement. They probably just thought that she was a beautiful, mindless idiot. She didn't care. She thought they were just spineless, mindless idiots - every one of them. Indeed, some of them were handsome, but none was as handsome as Jacob.