Jessica nodded. “A big mistake,” she said. “But that doesn’t explain why you’re here.”
Mike laughed. “Well, after I dragged him to a gay bar, I wasn’t about to let him go. He wanted to run back his hotel and see you as if this whole thing had never happened, but I made him come back here, spend the night and face you like a man.”
“I see.” Jessica considered her options. What was actually facing her was a man who didn’t trust her. Who said he cared deeply for her. Who had traveled across the country to find her then had nearly given up without even asking for her side of the story.
She decided to go home.
“I’m going to go now,” she said slowly. “I need some time to think.”
Ben’s face fell as he regarded her, but he merely nodded. “I understand,” he said. “And I’m sorry.”
It wasn’t until Jessica was nearly back to Woodbridge that she realized Ben had never told her about his supposedly good news. She’d never given him the chance.
Chapter Eleven
Jessica pushed her food on her plate, not feeling up to the family festivities of New Year’s Eve. The kids were going on various sleepovers after dinner, and Uncle Travis was taking her aunt to a party at The Top.
“What’s eating at you, dearie?” her aunt asked, clearly concerned.
“Oh, it’s nothing,” Jessica said, looking up and attempting to smile. “I guess things just aren’t going to work out with Ben after all.”
Her aunt nodded, putting another bite into her mouth. Jessica hadn’t told them what had happened yesterday, but her aunt had guessed last night that it had to do with Ben.
“He’s come an awful long way,” the woman said now, after she swallowed. “Don’t you think you ought to give him a chance?”
“He didn’t give me a chance!” The strength of her emotion surprised her, and she couldn’t stop the words from pouring out. “He came out here, saw me with Mike of all people, and decided we were a couple and that I didn’t want him. Then he hid away as if he were a child.”
Silence met her remark and lasted for several moments. Finally, Jessica glanced around the table to see everybody staring at her.
“What?” she asked, her tone annoyed. Didn’t she have a right to have a say in her own life? Ben could just make assumptions about her willy-nilly and make decisions that concerned her without her consent? She fumed.
“Just you’re quite worked up over it, is all,” Travis said.
“Well, maybe this is for the best, then,” her aunt said, after thinking on it. “Now, you know you don’t love him…or you do.”
Jessica put her face in her hands. “Ugh, this is all such a mess.”
“Well,” her uncle replied, “the great thing is, we know a young redhead who is excellent at fixing messes.” He grinned.
“What would you do?” Jessica asked, turning to Stella.
“Hmm, I think I’d decide how much the person meant to me and whether or not they deserved a chance to make things right.” She paused, her eyes filled with unspoken meaning. “Then I’d go from there. But you can’t do that while angry. So, I guess the first step is to stop feeling so indignant.”
“Yeah, really,” Billy laughed.
“What do you have to say?” Jessica flipped him a look.
“Well, I just don’t see how what he did is even so bad. He saw you with another guy and freaked out. I’d do that, too, if I had a girlfriend.” The kid shrugged, blushing. “Not that I do, of course,” he hastened to add.
“That’s good,” Travis chided. “Because you’re too young.”
“I know, I know,” he grumbled.
“So, what are you going to do?” asked Sadie. “You gonna go find him?” Her eyes lit up in that romantic way only a young child’s can.
“Well, not tonight,” Jessica admitted, a smile creeping over her face despite efforts to curb it. “Tonight, I have some other debts to settle.”
The family finished up, and the kids started clearing the table. As each party got ready to leave, her aunt took her aside. “If you do find yourself in need of some New Year’s fun, remember, we’ve an extra ticket to The Top tonight. Just call. We’ll leave it at the door for you.”
Jessica nodded, but declined. “I think a night in is exactly what I need.”
* * * *
The door to the little pawnshop jingled as Jessica stepped inside.
“How come you guys are never closed?” she asked, laughing and expecting to see Mae at the counter. Her steps faltered when she came face to face with the grandson instead.
“I’m just lucky, I guess,” the man griped.
“Where’s Mae?” she asked, feeling uncomfortable.
“Out of town,” Freddy sneered. “Visiting with my ma. I’m the only one forced to work on the biggest party night of the year.” He strode back behind the counter, pulled out a flask, and took a long swig, looking at her in a lecherous manner. “But my evening might have just perked up.”
Jessica tried to laugh the remark off. “Oh, I don’t think so. I’m just here for my rings. I’ve got the five-thousand.” Mike had given her an advance to buy back the rings after it had been made clear she wouldn’t need the money to fly out to see Ben. It truly was the best Christmas gift she’d ever received, and she was happier still to know she’d be expected to work it off. She hated taking freebies.
“They’re not here.”
She looked up in surprise. “I’m sorry, what?”
“Did I stutter?” The man spoke slowly and with menace, before switching his tack and letting out a loud guffaw. “Sold them the other day.”
“How dare you?” Jessica seethed. “Didn’t your grandmother make it clear they were to be held for me?”
The man shrugged. She wished she could remember his name. She’d leave him a bad report on one of those rating sites. Something about him just got under her skin.
“Don’t look at me,” he said. “Granny’s the one who sold them.” He smiled broadly. “Guess the old dame wasn’t as trustworthy as you thought.”
With light movements, the man jumped the counter, landing just inches from her. He grabbed her wrists. “And you should know better than to visit a pawnshop on the bad side of town alone late at night.” Freddy pulled her over to the corner where he used one hand to switch off the video monitoring, holding her arm at an awkward angle with his other. They were making their way to the front door, and Jessica assumed it was so the little monster could lock it.
Her eyes flicked up to the rifle behind the counter. Still there. She calculated in her head that the best time to wrench free would be when he was busy with the door. She’d twist, leap the counter and grab the gun—if she could.
Before she had a chance to put her plan into action, though, the hold on her wrists slackened as the sickening sound of fist into flesh filled the air. Her assailant howled, doubling over and clutching his stomach, only to be knocked back a second time by a punch to the jaw.
“You know,” Ben said, as he struggled to regain his breath, “we’ve got to stop meeting like this.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Not now,” Ben said, ushering her through the door. “I rented the red car in the lot. Let’s get out of here.”
* * * *
Ben drove them to Woodbridge in silence, his mind a muddle of coincidences and holiday hope. He’d been stopping by the pawnshop to give Mae back the rings. Jessica had made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him, and he couldn’t blame her. He’d decided the best course of action would be to go back home quietly, leaving things in Boston as he had found them. Jessica didn’t need any more turmoil in her life, and he hated that he was the cause of so much of it. He’d told himself he’d write her later. Explain. Tell her how much he cared for her. But he’d known that any admission of emotion on his part right now would only put more pressure on the girl, clearly already struggling with a lot on her plate.
Mike had told him in no uncertain t
erms that Jessica needed to be treated with absolute respect and love. If Ben couldn’t do it, Ben needed to leave. Ben had simply nodded. It wasn’t that he couldn’t do it. He wanted nothing more than to comfort Jessica and love her, possibly for the rest of their lives. But after his actions, he didn’t feel he had the right. He didn’t deserve her.
As they pulled into the driveway of the small family home, Ben checked his watch. His plane would board in a half hour. He’d never make it in time. At least, his newfound wealth allowed him the option to reschedule his flight.
He shut off the car and turned to Jessica before opening the door. “I’m sorry,” he said, surprised when she said the same thing at the same time. “You’re sorry?” he asked. “Whatever for?”
Jessica heaved a sigh and took his hand. “I was so hurt that you hadn’t trusted me that I allowed myself to wallow in petulance.” She looked down. “You didn’t do anything but draw conclusions based on what you knew at the time.”
“Conclusions I had no right drawing. I was out of my mind.”
Jessica smiled.
“Sometimes we have to give people we love a chance to make it right.”
Ben cocked his brow at her. “I’m sorry, did you just say—”
She giggled. “Nope. I did not. But I’d like a chance to find out if I someday could. We could start by you coming inside and keeping me company this holiday.”
Ben threw open the door then walked around to her side, letting her out. She cast a glance to the back as she grabbed her purse.
“All the bags,” she said in surprise.
“I was on my way to the airport,” Ben said.
“How did you end up at that pawnshop, anyway?”
Ben smiled as he placed a hand on the small of her back. “I’ll tell you, but it’s a long story.”
Jessica leaned into him. “Well, we’ve got all night now,” she said.
“Hopefully more.”
Chapter Twelve
Jessica let Ben into the house and followed, admiring the way his navy-blue pea coat stretched across his broad back. Turning to shut the door, she gasped when cold fingers covered her eyes.
“I have a surprise for you,” Ben whispered. “When you turn around, don’t open until I tell you to.”
“Um, okay…?” The words came out as more of a question, but it was good enough for Ben, who removed his hands and started rustling something behind her.
“I’m turning around now.”
“Okay, just remember, eyes closed.”
The rummaging continued for a few moments then silence stretched over the room. Straining her ears, she heard the faintest tinkle of metal on metal.
“What are you doing?” she asked, half-raising her lid.
“Aww, you cheated!” Ben said, laughing. “Well, here, then. So much for the presentation.” He thrust the jewelry into her palm.
“The rings…” she breathed as tears welled up. “How did you…where did you…how did this happen?”
Ben smiled broadly, obviously pleased with himself. “I got Mae to sell them to me a few days ago, when I first arrived. I’d meant to give them to you immediately, but then the whole Mike thing happened.” He paused, becoming serious. “I was stopping by the shop to return them, which is why I stumbled upon you.” He shook his head and spoke in a lowered voice, almost to himself. “Thank God, I did.” Brightening, he looked up again at Jessica, still rendered speechless from this massive, heartfelt gift. “But, yes, here they are. Merry belated Christmas and Happy New Year!”
She threw herself at him then, her torso melting into his tall frame. “Ben, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” The tears broke free and spilled down her cheeks. “I don’t know how you pulled it off, but thank you.”
His arms tightened around her, drawing her impossibly closer. “You’re welcome,” he said into her hair.
Then she stiffened a bit. She wanted to give herself to him entirely, and completely, but the circumstances were so similar to the last time that she couldn’t help but hesitate. She didn’t want them to have a sex life that revolved around drama and mishaps. She wanted to be sure he was with her for her, not releasing the tension they both held from an extreme experience.
Noticing her change in posture, he let her go, shoving his hands in his pockets.
“Well, then,” she said, hastening to take off her jacket to give her hands something to do. “How about a glass of wine to celebrate?”
“Perfect.” Ben smiled as he spoke the words.
* * * *
“Five, four, three, two, one! Happy New Year!” Jessica snuggled into him, lifting her head as Ben captured her mouth in a heady, searing kiss. She meant to break it off, but something about his urgency wiped away any notion of separating their lips. A bottle and a half of wine in, they had watched Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffen make fools of themselves for the hour before midnight, laughing easily at the jokes and taking in the sights of New York through the television screen.
Ben had made no attempt to touch her again, only putting his arm around her after she’d laid her head on his shoulder about a half hour ago. She’d never felt so happy, so celebratory on New Year’s before, but suddenly all the struggles she’d been through, all the mistakes she had made over the old year, ceased to matter. Suddenly, the only thing that counted was the future. Her past had converged to a single, perfect point, every misstep and stumble leading her here, back to her uncle’s house, leading her here, to Ben.
She broke contact to place her wine glass on the coffee table, stretching over Ben’s taut thigh muscles as she did. Leaning back into him, she craned her arms around his neck and pivoted to face him, sitting on his lap. The hard rod of his erection heated her leg through her jeans, causing a shiver to run up her spine.
She took his face into her hands, noticing the day’s stubble for the first time as she rubbed her thumbs over his cheeks and jaw line.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Ben asked. He took pains not to move beneath her, ensuring that anything that happened was entirely her decision.
“I can’t think of a better way to start a new year,” she said, dipping her head to kiss his eyelids. He groaned at her touch and surged up beneath her, closing the space between their bodies.
Jessica kissed a trail from his temple to his earlobe, nipping at it when he moaned his pleasure. One by one, she undid the buttons of his white shirt, exposing the muscled chest and soft, dark curls that spread over it. She flicked a finger over one hardened nipple experimentally and lowered her mouth to it when he responded with lust. Running her teeth gently over the exposed skin, she allowed her hands to wander over his tight abdomen and graze the area just underneath his waistband.
Ben sprung to life then, lifting her shirt over her head and running his fingers over the lace of her bra. His soft touch drove her to madness, and she shifted on him, wanting to feel his length between her thighs. Pushing her back slightly, he looked deep into her eyes as he undid his belt buckle and zip then raised his hips to slip the pants to the floor around his ankles. Free from its constraints, his erection sprung up toward the ceiling, and Jessica wrapped her hand around it, pumping slowly, marveling at the hard heat under his boxers. Ben leaned into the motion, a wet spot appearing on the fabric beneath her fingers. Stifling another groan, he inched her up, undoing her jeans and sliding them off.
She edged up onto her feet to free her long legs from the clothing then bent over him, placing her hands on either side of him for balance. She lowered her head and nuzzled him there, breathing in the scent of clean laundry, pine and man. Without removing his boxers, she clamped her mouth over his straining length, and Ben gasped, grabbing at her wrists. He reached up and kissed the hollow of her neck, trailing his lips over her collarbone then down to her breasts.
“Do you have anything?” Jessica asked on a breath.
Ben nodded. “In my pants’ pocket.”
She knelt on the floor and found the condom. Smiling, she held u
p the package then yanked down his boxer shorts. She tossed him the foil square then slipped off her panties. Ben sheathed himself, without taking his eyes off her.
Straddling him on the couch, she sunk down slowly, allowing his thick cock to fill her, inch by inch, the sensations washing over her in waves with each movement, until she had to shut her eyes and cling to him, her hands fisting his dark hair. Ben angled his hip up to her, then withdrew in a slow rebuttal to her thrusts.
He undid her bra, tossing it to the side and taking her aching nipple into his hot mouth. He suckled her, his tongue twirling over her naked skin, flicking over her sensitive peak and driving her to the brink.
Before she’d even realized the signs, orgasm grabbed her in a shock to the base of her spine, reaching its tendrils to the tips of her fingers and toes. She shivered and tingled, the enormity of the feelings coursing through her bringing her to the brink of tears.
Ben placed his hands on her hips, pulling and pushing her as the last vestiges of pleasure wrapped around her. He buried his face in her hair, grunting as he came. She trembled in his arms as he whispered her name.
She melted into him for glorious moments…until a sound at the front door jerked her to her feet.
“Shit!” she whispered, tossing Ben his clothing as she found it piece by piece on the floor. “My aunt and uncle are back!”
“Where do I go?” he asked, his eyes wide.
“The bathroom, quick, quick!”
He shut the door behind him as Jessica struggled to put her underwear and clothes on before her family crashed in to find her half-dressed on their sofa.
She fumbled over her bra strap, but managed to pull on most of her stuff in time, appearing only slightly disheveled when she greeted Travis and his wife.
“Happy New Year,” she said with a big smile.
“Happy New Year to you, kiddo,” her uncle smiled, tousling her curls in a gesture of familiarity he hadn’t used before. Stella must have talked to him, eased the way. He stepped inside, her aunt trailing him by just a few feet. They hung their coats and headed upstairs.
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