Chapter 48
A week later we were in my backyard. Bruno, a dog from my shelter, was running around as Wally threw a Frisbee. The dog was getting old, his legs not working quite as well as they used to. I’d decided that it was time for me to take in a new pet. Wally insisted that it be Bruno. The two of them had developed some kind of bond. He was like a kid, promising to bathe and walk him. I gave in. It wasn’t that I didn’t want Bruno. I just knew that he would be more of Wally’s dog than mine.
And he was. Over the last few days, we’d done a trial run, just to make sure that Bruno could acclimate to a new environment. He was skittish at first, unsure of his surroundings. Every noise scared him, but Wally was patient, really getting down to his level. I sat back and watched as Bruno, with his scruffy, graying face, began looking to Wally for comfort and love.
My only rule had been that the dog stay off the furniture. But by the second night that was squashed. Wally and I had been watching TV when Bruno walked up to him and placed his chin on his knee. As soon as he started whining, Wally turned his eyes to me.
“No,” I said. “We need to have boundaries.”
Bruno whined again, and put his cute, little paw on Wally’s leg. “Oh, come on Punks!” he said. “Look at this. Look at his face. How can you deny him?”
He was cute, looking up at Wally with his sad eyes. The whites underneath tugged at my heart. “Pleeeeease…” Wally begged.
“Oh, fine,” I said, scooting over to make room.
“Yes!” Wally said and pulled him up on the couch. He put his head in Wally’s lap and immediately went to sleep. That was when I knew I’d keep him. With my arm linked through Wally’s, his hand on my leg, and our dog curled into his lap. I didn’t think that I’d ever felt more peaceful, more happy. Now, as I watched Wally rough house with him, that feeling was solidified.
The sun was shining, making Wally sweat. He took off his shirt and threw it on the grass as he made his way over to me. I had a glass of water and handed it over to him. “Thanks,” he said and sat on the edge of my patio.
Silently, we watched Bruno run around the yard and inspect new things. He spotted a squirrel in a tree and barked ferociously up at it. Well, ferocious for him. Wally chuckled and lay back on the porch.
I turned to stare at him. His slender chest rose and fell slowly. My eyes landed on the dark trail of hair on his lower stomach and I sighed. Gently, I began rubbing his belly.
“You make me happy, Punks,” he said. “This. My girl sitting beside me, my dog running around the yard, the sun shining down. I never thought I’d ever have any of this.” He smiled. “I don’t know what you saw in me, but I’m so glad you saw it.”
He sat up and brought a hand to my face. “You’re so it for me,” he said, grinning.
I felt the same way. There was something that he did to me, some overwhelming pull he had. If we hadn’t gotten back together, I knew I’d have a hole in my chest for the rest of my life. A pressing void that only he could fill.
“I love you,” I said. His lip turned up and he brushed his nose against mine.
Our sweet moment was short lived as Bruno began barking at something by the fence. We turned to look and saw Trey stepping through the back gate. My eyebrows drew in.
“Sorry,” he said. “I kept knocking, but no one answered.”
Neither Wally nor I said anything as he made his way over to us, too confused by his sudden appearance, wary of his intent.
“I need to talk to you,” he said to Wally.
“Uh…what about?”
Trey cleared his throat, and shuffled nervously on his feet. “Can we go inside or something?”
Wally looked at me and I shrugged my shoulders. It was his call.
“Come on,” he said and walked to the sliding door. After Trey went through, Wally winked at me, and left the door open a crack so I could eavesdrop.
I heard chairs move around as they situated themselves at my dining room table. So that I could hear better, I lay down, putting my ear closer to the door.
“The case we have is solid,” Trey began, but something was off in his voice. It wasn’t self-assured or angry, more reluctant.
“Okay,” Wally said, and I imagined him shrugging. “Do what you want. Honestly, I’m ready to put all this behind me.”
“So you don’t even want it?” Trey asked, not believing him.
“I don’t have it now, and I’m fine. Look, I’m not gonna lie to you. It would be fucking great if I did. So many things in my life would be easier, but I’m not foaming at the mouth to get a piece of my dead grandfather’s inheritance. I’d rather have him, and deep down so would you. So would your mother. All of this fighting and bickering…I’m fucking over it. Y’all do what you need to, but I’m not gonna take part in it.”
They were silent, and I could only imagine how the tension must feel—both of them staring at each other, apparent life-long enemies.
“I read Pawpaw’s note,” Trey said. “Mom read hers, too.”
“Yeah,” Wally said, a hint of comradery in his voice. Despite their hang-ups, both of them had lost someone important to them.
“I get that he wanted this for you,” Trey said. “I get it. I think everyone just feels slighted, looked over, like you’re the more important one. The favorite.”
“That’s not true,” Wally said.
“It is,” Trey said. “But it’s cool. Maybe you were, and maybe there’s a reason for that.”
Silence again.
“What did his note tell you?” Wally asked. He was probably just as shocked as I was about this sudden turn.
“That’s between me and Pawpaw,” Trey said. “The point is I wanna drop it. I’m gonna convince everyone else to. Just promise me that you won’t make me regret it.”
He couldn’t help it. He had to be condescending, even when they had the chance for reconciliation.
Wally chuckled, an annoyed, put off sound. “Yeah, okay,” he said.
“And all this stuff with Kristen…” Trey said.
I tensed at that, afraid he would say something stupid and ruin all of this.
“What about her?” Wally asked, a little more defensive than necessary.
“Calm down,” Trey said. “I just wanna say that we’re good. I’ve been an ass about it. She and I…even if you hadn’t come along…we wouldn’t be anything to each other. You were right. I need to let it go. She’s good for you, man.”
I rolled my eyes. Like his opinion mattered.
Wally was good about it, and simply said, “Thanks.”
“I’ll get with everyone else over the next few days,” Trey said. “You’ll probably be hearing from Pawpaw’s lawyer soon.” The chairs moved again and then Trey’s head popped through the door. “See you around, Kristen,” he said.
“Bye.”
While Wally saw him to the front door, I ushered Bruno inside. “Can you believe that?” he asked after Trey was gone. “What made him change his tune all of a sudden?”
“Who cares?” I said. “Let this be something good. It’s your chance to start over with him.”
“Yeah,” Wally said and rubbed a hand through his hair. “Do you know what this means?” He didn’t let me respond. “I’m gonna get the hangar.”
“You’re happy?” I asked.
He looked at me and smiled. It was big, brightening his whole face. “Yeah,” he said.
Chapter 49
Only a few short months later, we were in his office. Some legal issues still needed to be resolved, but Wally had basically taken over his grandfather’s company. Ben, his business partner, had welcomed Wally aboard warmly. He seemed happy to have someone to share the burden.
But to Wally, this was no burden. This was his passion. He was already making plans for advertisements, specials, and bundled packages. He had an eye for this, something he’d never seen in himself before.
Initially, the other employees were reluctant to have Wally suddenly become their bo
ss. Many had known him since he was a kid, and didn’t appreciate him telling them what to do. Since I had experience in that area, I offered him what advice I could, and eventually, they were welcoming him, too.
Theo’s old office had been used for storage over the last few years, and after we cleaned it out, Wally couldn’t hide his excitement as he made it his own.
“Babe,” he said, pulling a rolling chair out of the corner. “This is the same one my grandfather used. God, all of this is so fucking surreal. I’ve seen him sit in this thing as long as I can remember. Now I’m gonna sit in it.” He took a breath and ran his hand along the top of it. “I don’t even know where to begin processing all I feel right now.”
Pride. That was the biggest thing I could feel radiating from him. If anyone deserved this, it was Wally. This man willingly volunteered at homeless shelters, just because. This was a man, who throughout his whole life, told everyone to shove it; he was going to find his own happiness. More often than not, he was happy, but he always lacked the validation that we all crave—the acknowledgement and respect of our peers. No matter what lies we tell ourselves, deep down we do care. And now…he finally had that.
“I’m proud of you,” I said.
He gave me a bashful smile. “It doesn’t really feel like I did anything for it, though. It was just handed to me.”
No. I wasn’t going to let him belittle this. “Don’t say crap like that,” I said. “You’ve done tons of things. You’re a good person. You didn’t watch over and care for your grandfather because you hoped to get this. You did it because it was what your heart told you to do. I wish there were more people like you in the world.”
He rolled his eyes. “Please. Stop acting like I’m some saint. We both know that ain’t true.”
Realizing that he was getting uncomfortable with the conversation, I changed the subject. “You don’t have a desk in here. Is there one lying around somewhere that you can borrow?”
He smiled. “Actually, I’m about to go get one.” With a wink, he cryptically left. I started sorting through boxes as I waited for him to come back.
I heard them grunting down the hallway, the sound of wood scraping as they pushed it. It took three of them, but eventually they maneuvered the desk inside the room.
I knew that desk. I stopped my rummaging and stood. Wally kept giving me sly smiles as they moved it to where he wanted. When the placing was finally perfect, Wally asked them to leave.
“You remember this desk?” he asked, rubbing the top of it.
“Yes,” I said, my body heating.
“Come over here,” he said.
I walked to him and loved how easily he made me eager for him. When I was directly in front of him, my breathing was already heavy. With strong arms, he grabbed my waist and placed me on top of it. I didn’t miss the fire in his eyes as he pulled me to the edge and settled between my legs.
“This is where I had you for the first time,” he said huskily.
“I remember,” I said. How could I forget? Not only had it been the most spontaneous sex I’d ever had, but he’d recorded it. And mailed me a copy.
“Do I make you happy?” he asked, out of nowhere.
He didn’t look insecure or like he was fishing for reassurance. He honestly seemed curious. “Absolutely,” I said.
“Good.”
He nuzzled my neck with his mouth and began kissing a trail from my chin to my shoulder. My eyes closed and I could feel our bodies priming for what we what was to come.
Slowly, he pulled my shorts off my legs. It was fitting, I thought. This is where it all started, where he imprinted himself on me. My hands went to his belt, and I gradually released him as our mouths found each other.
“Is the door locked?” I whispered as he positioned himself.
“No,” he said, steadily pushing into me.
“Maybe-…maybe we should…” My eyes couldn’t stay open as I felt every inch of him.
“Shhh,” he said. “Who cares? I want you.”
This is what it meant to be with Wally. You never knew what he would say or what he would do. Sometimes he embarrassed you. Sometimes he swept you off your feet.
As he started moving, all thoughts of the unlocked door faded, and I freely fell under the spell of Wally Nikolokakis.
Epilogue
Wally
My grandfather’s house was old and dusty, but I couldn’t even begin to express how fucking happy I was that this place, somewhere that had been such a huge staple in my childhood, was now mine.
My mother and Kristen were the only ones who helped me go through his possessions. That was hard, but necessary. I was making it my own now. It was tough moving out of the home I’d been in for years, but I knew my roommates were ready to move on too. It was time.
I was in the living room trying to hang some pictures but couldn’t find the hammer.
“Baby!” I called, instead of walking the few feet into the kitchen. “Hey, baby!”
“Yeah,” she said, coming around the corner. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail. The work of the day had pulled several strands loose and her mascara was smeared. She looked tired, worn out, and I couldn’t help it. I pictured her naked. Before I lost myself to it, I asked her what I needed to.
“Have you seen the hammer?”
She smiled. “It’s right there.” Her finger pointed to a box in the corner.
“Of fucking course,” I muttered.
“I’m almost done in here,” she said. “I’ll come help when I’m finished.”
“Thanks, babe,” I said.
As I began hanging some pictures on the wall, I realized how much I appreciated her. She had no reason to be with me. No reason to love or even want me. But she did. God, for whatever reason she did.
I tried to imagine how my life would be right now if she weren’t in it. I couldn’t. All of this, all of the things I was able to do now, they would feel so empty. Hollow with no meaning.
That’s what she’d brought to my life. Meaning. Purpose. She made me a better man. I stopped my hammering and leaned a hand against the fireplace mantle. You almost lost her, I thought. The time I’d been without her had been dark. I spiraled back into my usual shitty behavior of drinking and women.
For months, I’d been a shell of myself, but was too stubborn to see what I could have. I didn’t know if that guilt would ever fade. The hurt I’d caused her. The unnecessary pain I’d inflicted. Because I saw now, it didn’t matter which road I took, they all led to her.
I walked over to the kitchen and stuck my head in the door. “Hey,” I said and she looked up from sorting dishes. “I’m gonna marry you one day, Punks.”
She blushed and looked back down to the glasses in front of her. “Okay,” she said, smiling bashfully.
She might have thought I was joking, but I was serious. One day. Not tomorrow. Probably not in a month. Maybe not even a year. But one day, I was gonna marry that girl. There was no question about it.
Five Months Earlier
Paul
I was sitting on a lawn chair in Marlowe’s backyard. Lucas had called and asked that I be there for something important. Apparently it was really important, because it seemed like half the town was here. How long had it been since I’d been back? A month? Maybe two?
Mia.
Both of us were pretending not to notice the other, but each time her back was turned I took the opportunity to study her. Her long, caramel colored hair was flowing down her back. She was wearing white shorts and a red, polka dot top that flowed with her movements. Her sandals twined up her ankle.
Mia.
She was smiling with everyone, her eyes lighting up. What had I done?
I needed her.
Marlowe was the only other person here that I really knew, and she was busy. I felt so out of place, pathetic, creeping around the back yard.
I saw the flash of red in my peripheral, and quietly observed Mia disappearing into the house. My cup of coke was ha
lf-full, but I took a big swig and followed after her.
Inside, she was nowhere to be seen, but there were fewer people in here. I filled my drink and stood in the living room. Down the hallway, I heard a door open and turned.
Mia.
The breath left her as she saw me. My sudden appearance had taken her off guard, shaken her. Good. With determined steps I approached her. She was nervous, looking down, to the side, contemplating stepping around me. I blocked her path.
“Talk to me,” I said.
“About what?” she said, unable to make eye contact. “There’s nothing more to say.”
I grabbed her hand and pulled her into the bathroom. After I closed the door and turned the lock, I leaned against the counter. Her hand was still holding mine, her fingers rubbing my knuckles.
Even though there were hundreds of things I needed to say to her, we weren’t speaking. Her other hand landed on my stomach, and I palmed the top of her thigh, pulling her closer.
Her big, doe-eyes looked up at me. I took my chance.
Our mouths met and she sighed, stepping into me. Her hand was soft as it moved to my hair. Her lips and tongue were warm connecting with mine. God, had I missed her. I’d been such a fool. An idiot.
She missed me too. I could hear it in her quiet desperation, the shallow breaths leaving her. She hadn’t forgotten how much she loved me.
My hand push under her shirt and settled on her waist, trying to pull her closer, but suddenly she stepped away and slapped me across the arm.
She was breathless and I was too. Fire was in her eyes. Anger. Resentment.
“Don’t do this,” I said.
Her mouth set and she unlocked the door. I stayed in the bathroom for a few more minutes to try and calm myself.
I shouldn’t have come. I knew that seeing her would rattle me.
At the back door I watched Lucas call everyone’s attention to the middle of the yard and stepped out. Mia was across the way smiling with one of her friends. She could fool them, but not me. I saw how fake it was.
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