“Oh, no. She’s showing a house.”
So much for the hope Sass was using the kids as an opening gambit in mending their stalemate. Jacob frowned. “Who’s watching you?”
“Our babysitter.”
“She’s taking a nappy,” Corrine piped up while holding up her arms.
And that was what prompted this interest in his flower’s sleep cycle, Jacob guessed as he lifted her highness up in his arms. He caught the wistful look CJ quickly suppressed at seeing his sister picked up. Jacob knew that left-out feeling. He reached out and ruffled his hair, bringing forth the kid’s smile. Shit, the kid had a smile warmer than the sun. It felt good bringing it to the surface. Almost as good as it was going to feel to vent on the woman who was supposed to be watching these two.
“Let’s go have a talk with your babysitter.”
* * * * *
Sass stood in front of Jacob’s door, not sure whether the primary emotion she felt was anger or fear. Since she’d come home two minutes ago and found Jacob’s note on the counter, she’d demonstrated an amazing ability to ricochet between the two.
Babysitter fired. Have confiscated the kids. We’re holed up next door.
Jacob
Why had he fired the babysitter? She stepped onto the porch. Good manners demanded she knock. Anxiety overrode common courtesy, and she ended up bursting in, expecting to catch Jacob in the middle of…she wasn’t sure just what. It certainly wasn’t what she found him in.
Jacob was sprawled on the couch. If she wasn’t mistaken, that was Corrine’s special blanket draped over his knees. CJ’s stuffed bunny, which he’d outgrown but still considered special, was wedged between Jacob’s cheek and the arm of the couch. From the looks of Jacob’s bleary eyes, it was taking everything he had to stay awake. And from the look of the debris-strewn house, he might have nodded off a time or two.
“Mind telling me what you are doing with my children?” she asked as she slowly dropped her purse to the floor. It never ceased to amaze her how quickly her children could take a house from company perfect to D-Day havoc.
“Keeping them safe.” He struggled up to his elbows. Sass crossed the short distance between them. As she passed a wing-back chair, she dropped her coat into it. With the back of her hand pressed to his head, she pushed him back to a prone position. Her free hand she slipped under his sweatshirt to rest against his belly. The muscles immediately contracted and his breath caught. A quick glance at his face told her why. He wanted her. The knowledge settled deep inside, under her defenses, weakening them from within.
“You don’t have a fever,” she informed him, withdrawing her hand from beneath his shirt.
“Headache,” he muttered.
She could see the signs now. The pallor beneath his tan, the lines of strain around his mouth. “A nasty one from the looks of things.”
His smile was more of a grimace. “Not so bad anymore.”
He caught her hand and tugged her down to sit on the couch beside him. She told herself expediency was the reason she allowed it, not because she craved his nearness or the intimacy they’d lost. It was so hard to resist Jacob. He made her believe in rainbows and the pots of gold at the end of them.
“Where are the kids?” It was natural for her to rest her hand on his chest for balance while her mother’s ear searched for the children.
Jacob placed his hand over hers and the discord in their relationship vanished as if it had never been. “They’re in the kitchen making me juice.”
Sass heard water running. And a hastily smothered “rats” from behind the closed kitchen door. Something rolled across the counter and thumped to the floor. In unison, two young voices said, “Uh-oh!”
Sass removed her hand from Jacob’s. “I’d better go see what they’re up to.”
His fingers gripped her thigh, keeping her put. “If you give them a chance, they’ll clean it up themselves.”
Sass got to her feet, brushing his hand from her leg. “What on Earth makes you think they intend to clean it up?”
“CJ and I had a talk while you were gone. He’ll want to clean it up.”
He caught her hand as his eyes ran over her from head to toe, lingering on her breasts beneath her pink silk shirt with the intensity of a touch, until they swelled and the nipples peaked. With a completely satisfied grin, he moved that hotter-than-a-touch gaze to her groin. As she watched, his eyelids flickered, and he licked his lips.
As if his imagination was connected to her pussy, her muscles contracted. He released her hand, bringing his to the side of her hip. She could have stepped away, but she made the mistake of glancing at his face. She hadn’t known blue eyes could be that expressive, hold that much passion. The heat in his gaze seared through the last of her defenses, holding her hostage to the emotion between them. He cupped her right buttock, squeezing briefly, tracing the swell of her hip before circling forward until he grazed the front of her mound through her pants. His glance flicked hers as the jolt of white-hot pleasure shot through her. A purely masculine smile spread his lips before he pressed his fingertips deliberately into the seam running between her legs. “You look good enough to eat.”
Every nerve ending in her body leapt to life. Her hips tipped forward, encouraging his touch even as she captured his hand in hers in a last ditch effort for control. “What happened to Mrs. Sheridan?”
The question came out a broken squeak, lacking substance. She wasn’t surprised that he ignored it. His palm turned in her grip. His fingers slid between her thighs, cupping her intimately. The incipient heat, the impending caress, hovering just beyond delivery, teased her passion higher. Desire licked along her nerves like a living thing, devouring common sense, destroying resistance. Her pussy, her soul wept with anticipation. This was Jacob. And he wanted her. She gripped his wrist like a lifeline as he murmured, “Part your legs.”
It didn’t occur to her to resist. The husky order blended with the tension in her core, coiling tighter and tighter with every second his touch lingered…doing nothing. Promising everything. She closed her eyes, letting the power, the beauty of wanting him sweep through her. It had been so long since she’d felt this magic, and she was so hungry for him. “Mrs. Sheridan?”
“Come for me, and I’ll tell you.”
Her eyes flew open. She looked down. He couldn’t mean it. Her kids were in the next room. Might come in any minute. But all she found in his gaze was that simmering passion and a sensual determination that brooked no argument. “The kids…”
His fingers rubbed high up, just under her clit. Weakness seeped into her knees as pleasure bloomed in her center. “I’ll hear them before they come in.”
“They might peek.” She’d die if they were caught. She’d die if he stopped.
His nail scraped her sensitive point once. Twice. She bit her lip on a betraying whimper. His palm opened and pressed up. “I can feel your heat.”
The whimper burst past her control. Her knees buckled. Jacob caught her weight in his palm, supporting her. She braced her hands on his shoulders. His finger stroked further back, reminding her of their last encounter.
“The door squeaks, and I have a clear view,” he elaborated as he pressed high and hard, staying with her as her hips bucked, not granting her any respite from the lust riding her principles into the ground. “Trust me, baby. Let me make you feel good.”
For a second, she couldn’t think of anything except the way his thumb and index finger were burrowing into her pussy and ass through the thin barrier of her clothing. “Do you promise?”
“I won’t let you down, Sass.”
Beneath the husky timbre of desire, there was another inflection. One she knew she should be paying attention to, but then his thumb centered on that taut, eager bundle of nerves and all coherent thought fled. She gave him the trust he asked for. Gave him her heart, her soul, things that had always been his, and let him stroke her to heaven. And along the way, she closed her eyes and pretended, one more time, that th
is meant more than this moment. More than sex.
The climax hit her with no warning. Fast, hard and all-encompassing it crashed through her in a thundering wave of unbearable sensation. She could only gasp his name as her breath seized and her muscles locked. The scream started way down deep, rumbled and shook, before exploding outward. Before the first note hit the air, Jacob yanked her against his chest, pressing her face into the hard pad of muscle, muffling her pleasure and her tears against the broad expanse. Cradling her as she shook, whispering nonsense in her ear as the last shudders rocked her resolve.
When she regained control, he was still holding her, his big hands gentle, a broad smile upon his face. One she couldn’t begrudge him. He was the only man who could wring her out so dry, a dishrag had more substance. She touched the corner of his smile. “What about you?”
He caught her hand and brought it to his lips, teasing the palm with his tongue, his eyes crinkling at the corner as her well-primed body quivered to attention. “You can owe me one.”
“It’s not right—”
“I’m not asking for right, baby, just a fair shot.”
She searched his expression. He wasn’t talking about sex. He wanted a fair shot with her and her kids. Oh God, she wanted to give it to him, but if she did and he later walked away, he’d take her heart and soul with him. She’d never survive. She closed her eyes and took a breath. “What happened to Mrs. Sheridan?”
“I fired her.”
Jacob was not vindictive or mean. He wouldn’t have fired her without a reason. A good reason. “Why?”
“She was drunk.”
Of all the things she had expected him to say, that wasn’t it. “Drunk?”
“And passed out. Apparently, that’s her modus operandi. She comes. She drinks. She sleeps. At least according to the kids.”
Sass sat up, running her hand through her hair, tugging at the snarls as if the small pain could create sense from chaos. “She had such good references. I had no idea…” How could she have had no idea?
Jacob’s hand settled on her back, soothing, warm. She had to steel herself against the lure of his touch. It would be so easy to rely on him, to become dependant.
“How could I not know?” she whispered, staring at the oak door between her and her children, the weight of guilt pressing down on her.
Jacob’s hand opened wide on her spine, covering her rib cage, as if he wanted to shield her from the reality she couldn’t escape. He was always trying to protect her, but he couldn’t. Nothing could. She pushed her hands off her face. The tremor in them reflected the shaking in her soul. How could she have messed up so thoroughly?
“It’s not your fault, Sass.”
She couldn’t look at him. “Then whose fault is it?”
Jacob’s sigh blew across her neck. “She’s a functional alcoholic, sweetheart. Unless you came at the right time, there’s no way you could know.”
The words didn’t assuage her guilt. She could have lost one or both of her children, all because she’d trusted the wrong person. She sucked in a breath, holding it. His fingers pressed on her ribs, rubbing lightly, encouraging her to relax, to lean against him. She did, resting against his chest, just for a minute, listening to his heartbeat as CJ’s bunny pressed into her cheek while in her mind, a thousand “what might haves”—none of them pretty—ran through her head.
“The kids are fine,” Jacob said in his deep, soothing voice. “Nothing happened.”
“But something could have—”
He kneaded her back, massaging away the painful tension pulling her spine so tight she thought she’d shatter. “But it didn’t.”
No. But probably only because Jacob had been there and had taken charge. Sass turned and kissed his chest through his well-worn sweatshirt, then his chin and, lastly his lips. “Thank you.”
His hand slid up to cradle her head in his palm. She loved it when he held her like that. Strong, tender, and in control. She relaxed into his kiss, letting the pleasure wash away the uncertainty and the loneliness, focusing on this minute. This now. It was easier than thinking about tomorrow.
Tomorrow. Oh God, this weekend! She pushed off his chest. “What am I going to do about Saturday?”
“What’s Saturday?”
She lowered her voice. “I’ve got a conference to attend. I’m supposed to give a seminar on writing from the heart for the first-time novelist.” It was her first big moment as a published writer. It might even get her a bit of press coverage. She closed her eyes. “I’m going to have to cancel.”
“I could watch them.”
He got her full attention with that outrageous statement. Even pale and red-eyed from illness, Jacob looked all male. Someone who belonged in the pages of Playgirl, not in her kitchen slapping together peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Jacob a babysitter? Sass simply could not imagine it. Not for her two children who had been known to intimidate the most experienced of caregivers. “I really don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“I just don’t think you’ll be up to it.”
He sat up, the paleness of his skin and the wince as he reached upright not diminishing the blow of his displeasure. “I took care of them today.”
She looked around his house and bit her tongue on the immediate retort. “CJ and Corrine can be…trying.”
Jacob waved that description aside like it was nonsense. “They’re great kids, full of energy and independence.”
He had no idea of the trouble he was inviting. Hot on the heels of that thought came another one. Maybe he deserved the dose of reality a weekend with her kids would impart. A taste of real parenthood. At least then they could stop this charade.
“I’m sitting here thinking,” she said, holding his gaze with hers, “that I really ought to let you see what the real world is like.”
His gaze didn’t flinch from hers. “Go right ahead, Sass. I told you, I’m ready for the kids.”
“Not my kids.”
“Try me.”
Chapter Seven
Sass hesitated Saturday night before putting her key in the lock and opening her front door. She didn’t really expect to find Jacob in a good mood. More than likely he’d be spitting bullets and ready to murder her children after spending the entire day with them. A day way harder than it should have been for reasons that had seemed so sensible in the panicked state of mind in which she’d made them, but appeared so shallow and self-centered after spending the three hour drive home analyzing her conduct of the last month. Fear, she decided, did not make for sound decisions and she hadn’t been fair to Jacob.
Jacob had been trying so hard with her kids this week. He had good intentions, but every time CJ’s smile faltered, or Corrine’s eyes teared up, he would reverse a perfectly sound decision. Her kids weren’t stupid. They recognized an easy mark when they saw one. Sass could have put a stop to it by taking Jacob aside and talking with him. Heck, she could have stepped in when her kids had cast her hesitant, I-know-I’ve-gone-too-far looks, but she hadn’t. By her silence, she had given tacit approval to their behavior and had undermined every effort Jacob made to show he could handle the role of father.
All because she was afraid to take a chance. She didn’t know when she’d turned into such a chicken shit, but it had occurred to her on the car ride home that she didn’t like herself like this. She looked at her key poised at the entrance to the lock. Her fear may have cost her a good man, because no matter how good a man Jacob was, everyone had their breaking point and with the way she’d set him up, in all likelihood Jacob had reached his today. And since staying out here on the porch wasn’t going to change anything, she might as well go in and face the music.
She, sighed, slid the key in the lock, and stepped into the foyer. She halfway expected to find Jacob asleep on the couch. Lord knows, she would be if she had just spent the day with her kids.
He wasn’t on the couch. He was in her small kitchen, mopping the floor. On his hand
s and knees.
“I have a perfectly good mop.”
He gave the floor an aggravated swipe with the cloth. “Not anymore.”
She looked at his hair, which had been neatly tied back this morning, but was now escaping its confinement in rampant chunks. She set her purse on the table. She had to push aside what appeared to be three decks of playing cards. Straightening the mess was a convenient distraction. “Why not?”
“Because CJ used it to clean up the jelly.”
One dollop of jelly didn’t ruin a mop. As discreetly as possible, she strolled by the trashcan. Out of the corner of her eye, she noted the contents. Well, that solved that mystery. A dollop might not ruin a mop, but a whole super-size jar would certainly do a number on it.
“Well, then why don’t you let me finish cleaning up the last of the jelly, and you can go home and get some sleep?”
Jacob looked up. His gaze traveled from the blue and white pumps on her feet over her blue silk skirt and jacket before coming to rest on her face. He was not a happy camper. If she was to speculate, she’d say he was holding on to his temper by a thread.
“It would take more than sleep to make me forget this day. A keg of beer might get me started on the job, but it sure as hell wouldn’t finish it.” He got to his feet in a quick surge of power. He threw the rag he’d been wiping the floor with into the sink. “And I’m not cleaning the jelly off the floor. I’m cleaning up orange juice.”
“Oh.” She eyed the refrigerator. She was dying of thirst, but from the set of Jacob’s shoulders, it would be worth more than her life to set foot on his pristine floor. She sighed, veered to the left and drifted into the living room. In the corner the tree stood bedecked in lights, ready for decorating. With all he’d had to cope with today, he’d managed to put the tree up. She walked over and plugged it in. The lights glowed steady for a heartbeat, and then one strand at a time began to blink. She touched a bright red light. He must have heard her telling CJ this morning that she’d try to get the tree up this weekend and also heard the child’s disappointed response. The man was going to drive himself insane if he continued to attempt to be everything to her and the kids. He needed to learn there was more than just giving in a family. With a couple swipes of her hands she knocked the empty light boxes off the couch and took a seat. He needed to learn to take.
A Bit of Sass Page 6