by Diana Palmer
"I had a girlfriend who couldn't get pregnant at first," Dani said, recalling an old friend from years past. She grinned. "Five years after she got married she had triplets, followed by twins the next year."
Gabby burst out laughing. "What a delightful
prospect!"
"What's all the noise in here?" J.D. asked, opening the kitchen door. "Are we eating tonight?" he asked Gabby.
She got up and kissed him tauntingly on his hard mouth. "Yes, we're eating tonight, bottomless pit. And we're laughing about triplets."
His eyes widened. "What?"
"Tell you later. Let's eat!"
It was late when Dani and Dutch got back to his elegant lakeside apartment. She hadn't expected such luxury, and it emphasized once again the difference between her lifestyle and his. During dinner the conversation had inevitably gone back to old times and comrades whose
names Dani didn't recognize. And then mention was made of the new job Apollo had offered Dutch, and Dani listened with wide eyes as it was outlined. It wasn't as dangerous as what he was doing now, of course, she reminded herself. There wasn't half the risk. She'd have to get used to it. She could, too, if she tried.
"I don't think I can manage a desk job," he told her as if he sensed her deep, frightening thoughts.
She turned from the window, where she was watching the lights of cars far below, and the city lights near the river. "Yes, I know that."
He looked at her for a long time, hands in his pockets, eyes narrow and dark and searching. "But I'm going
to try."
She nodded. "I won't ask you for anything more than that," she said then. "I'll settle for whatever you can give me. I...have very little pride left." She sighed and she seemed to age. "I'd like to go to bed now, Eric. I'm so
tired."
"It's been a long day. You can have whichever bedroom you like."
She looked at him across the room, started to speak, and then smiled faintly and walked down the hall.
"Dani..."
She didn't turn. "Yes?"
There was a long, trembling silence. "My room is the first door to the left," he said thickly. "The bed.. .is large enough for all three of us."
Tears stung her eyes. "If you don't mind," she
whispered.
"Mind!" He was behind her, beside her; he had her in his arms, close and warm and protected. His mouth found hers in a single graceful motion. She clung. He lifted her, devoured her. His dark eyes sought hers as he
kissed her.
"Now?" he whispered, trembling.
"Now," she moaned huskily.
He bent to her mouth again and she trembled with delicious anticipation as he carried her slowly into his bedroom and closed the door behind them.
Two WEEKS LATER SHE HAD to go back home for her checkup, and to hire someone else to help Harriett at the bookstore. Dutch flew back with her since the weekend was coming up. But he had to be in Chicago for a conference on Monday.
"I don't like leaving you here," he said curtly, glaring around at her small apartment. She'd become so much a part of his life that it felt odd to leave her behind. She didn't want the parting, either, but she hadn't switched to a Chicago doctor yet, and she needed to be sure about the baby.
"Don't worry about me," she told him, holding his big hand in hers as she walked him to the door. "I'll be fine. The nights will last forever, but I'll manage," she
teased.
He didn't smile. He touched her cheek, feeling tremors all the way to his soul. It was because of the baby that he felt this uneasy, he told himself. Only because of the baby. "I'll be back day after tomorrow," he said.
"We'll spend the week here, getting things in order. Tell Harriett I said to look after you."
"Harrie will." She smiled. "Do I get a goodbye kiss?"
He pulled her against his tall frame. "I wonder if I'll make it out the door if I kiss you?" he murmured with a dry smile. "Come here."
He drew her up on her tiptoes and covered her smiling mouth with his. It was like flying, he mused, eyes closing as he savored the taste of her. Flying, floating. She made his head light. He lifted his lips finally and searched her loving eyes. It didn't bother him so much these days, that adoration. Perhaps he'd gotten used to it.
He brushed a last kiss against her lips. "Behave. And watch these steps, okay?"
"Okay. 'Bye."
He touched her hair. '"Bye." He walked away without looking back. She closed the door, and realized she hadn't felt so alone since her parents had walked away from her years and years ago.
CHAPTER TEN
HARRIETT WAS ALL EARS, fascinated by the news that Dani's unlikely husband was actually going to try to settle down.
"He must feel something for you," she said, smiling at Dani. "I don't care what you say, no man is going to go to those lengths just because of a purely physical involvement."
Dani had been afraid to think that, much less say it. But she stared at Harriett for a long time, wondering.
"In some ways you're still very naive, my friend," Harriett said with a wicked grin. "He's hooked. He just hasn't realized it yet."
If only it were true, Dani thought, praying for a miracle. If only he liked the job Apollo offered him. Even moving to Chicago wouldn't be any hardship. Harriett and Dave would visit. And she could come back to Greenville from time to time. Harriett could be godmother. She smiled.
With her mind on Dutch, not on what she was doing, she went to step up on the long ladder against the wall to get a book from a high shelf. She was halfway up when she slipped. Terrified, screaming as she hit the floor, she looked up at Harriett, her face white.
"Oh, God, the baby!" she sobbed, clutching her stomach.
"It's all right," Harriett said quickly, soothing her. "It's all right, I'll get an ambulance. Lie still! Are you hurt anywhere?"
"I don't know!"
Harriett ran for the phone. Dani lay there, panic-stricken, clutching her stomach. No, please don't let me lose my baby, she prayed. Her eyes closed and tears bled from them as the first pain began to make itself felt in her leg, in her back. Please, please, please!
The next few minutes were a nightmare of waiting, worrying. The ambulance came, the attendants got her on the stretcher, took her to the hospital, and into the emergency room, with Harriett right behind. She hardly knew Harriett was there, she was so afraid of losing the baby.
She was examined by the emergency room doctor, who would tell her nothing. Then the tests began and went on and on until finally they took her to a room and left her shaking with worry. Her doctor would talk to her when they got the test results, she was informed.
She cried and cried. Harriett tried to soothe her, but it was useless. She was feeling a dragging pain in her lower stomach, and she knew she was going to lose the baby. She was going to lose her baby! Harriett asked her for something, a name in Chicago to call, to tell Dutch. Numbly, she gave her J.D. Brettman's name and closed her eyes. It was no use, she wanted to say. Dutch would come, but only out of responsibility., .and then she re-
',
membered the other time, the other pregnant woman, and she was terrified of what he might do.
Dr. Carter came walking in a few hours later, took one look at her and went back out to call for a sedative. He came in again, took her hand and nodded Harriett toward the door. He didn't speak until she was gone.
"The baby's going to be fine," he said. "So are you.
Now, calm down."
The tears stopped, although her eyes remained wet
and red. "What?"
"The baby's all right." He smiled, his blue eyes twinkling. "Babies are tough. They've got all that fluid around them, wonderful protection. Of course, you're bruised a little here and there, but bruises heal. You'll
be fine."
She leaned back with a sigh. "Thank God," she said. "Oh, thank God. But—but these dragging pains," she added, pressing her stomach.
"False labor. A few twing
es are normal," he said, grinning. "Now, stop worrying, will you?"
The nurse came in with a syringe, but before she could go any farther, the door flew open and a blond man burst into the room with eyes so wild that both doctor and nurse actually backed up a step.
"Eric!" Dani whispered, astonished at the look on
his face.
He went to her, a wet, disheveled raincoat over his gray suit. He was wild-eyed, flushed as if he'd been running, and half out of breath.
"You're all right?" he asked unsteadily, touching her
as if he expected to find broken limbs. "The baby's all right?"
"Yes," she whispered. "Eric, it's all right!" she repeated softly, and the look on his face was the answer to a prayer. "It's all right, I just fell off the ladder, but I'm—"
"Oh, God." He sat down beside her. The hands that touched her trembled, and there was a look in his eyes that struck her dumb. He caressed her face and suddenly bent, burying his face in her throat. "Oh, God." He was shaking!
Her arms went up and around him, hesitantly, her hands smoothing his hair, comforting him. She felt something wet against her throat and felt her own eyes begin to sting.
"Oh, darling," she whispered, holding him closer. Her eyes closed as the enormity of what he felt for her was laid bare, without a word being spoken. She laughed through her tears. She could conquer the world now. She could do anything! He loved her!
"Reaction," the doctor said, nodding. He took the syringe from the nurse. "Pregnancy is hard on fathers, too," he murmured dryly. "Off with that coat, young man." He removed the raincoat, and the suitcoat, then rolled up the sleeve of the shirt without any help from Dutch, who wouldn't let go of Dani, and jabbed the needle into the muscular arm. "I'll have a daybed rolled in here, because you aren't driving anywhere. Dani, I think you'd do without a sedative now, am I right?" he added with a grin.
"Yes, sir," she whispered, smiling dreamily as she rocked her husband in her arms.
He nodded and went out with the nurse, closing the
door behind him.
"I love you," Dani whispered adoringly. "I love you, I love you, I love you...."
His mouth stopped the words, tenderly seeking, probing, and his lips trembled against hers.
He lifted his head to look at her, unashamedly letting her see the traces of wetness on his cheeks. "J.D. came himself to tell me after Harriett called." He touched her face hesitantly. "I went crazy," he confessed absently. "J.D. got me a seat on the next plane. I ran out of the terminal and took a cab away from some people.... I don't even remember how I got here." He bent and brushed his mouth softly against hers as he let the relief wash over him. His wife. His heart. "I was.. .1 was going to call you tonight. I wanted to tell you how much I like what I'll be doing. I found us a house," he added slowly. "On the beach, with a fenced yard. It will be nice, for the baby."
"Yes, darling," she whispered softly. He brushed the hair back from her face. "I was so afraid of what I'd find in here," he said unsteadily. "All I could think was that I'd only just realized what I felt for you, and so quickly it could have ended. I would have been alone again."
"As long as I'm alive, you'll never be alone," she
whispered.
He touched her mouth, her throat, her swollen stomach. "Danielle, I love you," he whispered breathlessly, admitting it at last, awe in his whole look.
"Yes, I know," she answered on a jubilant little laugh.
He laughed, too. "I've never said that before. It isn't hard." He looked into her eyes. "I love you."
She smiled, stretching. "I love you, too. Ooh," she groaned, touching her back. "I'm bruised all over. That stupid ladder!"
"No more stupid ladders," he said firmly. "We're moving to Chicago, where I can watch you. Harriett can visit."
Her eyes searched his. "This is what you really want?"
"How can I take care of you from across the world?" he asked reasonably. His voice was slowing, and he looked drowsy. "Anyway, I was getting too old for it. And I like the challenge of teaching techniques I've learned." He kissed her softly again. "J.D. told me I could do it. When he and Gabby got married, he decided that marriage was more exciting than dodging bullets. I think he has something there."
He looked down at her stomach and the last of the barriers came down. "He's going to be all right, they're sure?" he asked touching the swell.
Her lips parted, smiling. She sat up and touched his face with soft, loving hands. "I'm giving you a baby," she whispered, smiling. "A healthy, strong boy. The doctor said so."
He started to speak, and couldn't. And tried again. "I'll take care of you both," he whispered.
She reached forward and caught his full lower lip gently between her teeth. "I'll take care of you, just as soon as they let me out of here," she teased.
He chuckled softly, putting a hand to his temple. "I may need taking care of. My God, what was in that syringe?"
"A sedative. They brought it for me, but I guess they decided you needed it more."
He smiled ruefully. "I'd like to talk some more, but I think I'd feel better lying down."
Dr. Carter came in with a nurse and a spare bed even as the words were echoing in the room. He glanced at his watch and grinned at Dutch. "I thought you'd be about ready for this. Lie down, father-to-be, and you can both have a nice nap until supper. Feeling okay now, Dani?" he asked.
"Just wonderful." She sighed, trading soft looks with her drowsy husband. The nurse was eyeing him wistfully, and Dani only smiled with the confidence of a woman who is deeply loved. As Dutch lay down her eyes closed on the smile he gave her. Minutes later she was asleep, with the future lying open and bright ahead.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
THE CHRISTENING TOOK place six months later, with little two-month-old Joshua van Meer cradled in his mother's arms. At Dani's side Dutch burned with pride in his young son, and amused looks passed among an odd group on the front pew of the Presbyterian church in the outskirts of Chicago.
Harriett felt uneasy, sitting next to them all, and Dave had actually started to get up except that she'd caught him in time. What a collection of unusual men, she thought, gaping. There was an older, wiry little man sitting beside a wiry, tough-looking woman and they were holding hands. There were two black men, a tall, dignified one and a shorter, grinning one. There was a huge dark-eyed, dark-headed man sitting beside a green-eyed brunette who was obviously pregnant. On the other side was a swarthy Latin, arms folded, looking elegant. Harriett turned her attention back to the minister, who had taken the child in his arms and was walking it up and down the rows of pews. Harriett smiled. Her godchild. Dani had wanted her to stand with them during the ceremony, but she'd twisted her ankle getting on the airplane, and could hardly manage to stand. Just as well,
she thought with a smile at the big blond Dutchman. She and that handsome giant were too much alike to ever get along. But even she had to admit that he was a terrific husband and father. A surprisingly domestic man, all around. A really normal man. Except for his friends here. After the ceremony was over, the group beside Harriett sat still. She wondered for a wild minute if they were escaped fugitives, because they seemed to be looking around them all the time.
Dani rushed forward and hugged her. "Wasn't Joshua good?" she asked enthusiastically, kissing the white-clad baby in her arms. He cooed up at her. "I was so proud of him! Harrie, you haven't met our friends.
Gabby!"
Gabby Darwin Brettman drew her tall husband along with her, beaming as she made faces at the baby.
"Isn't he gorgeous! I want a girl myself," Gabby said, her bright green eyes gleaming, "but J.D.'s holding out for a boy."
"I don't care what it is, as long as it's ours," J.D. grinned. "Hi, Dani. Nice ceremony. Dutch didn't even pass out; I was proud of him."
"Imagine Dutch married." The wiry old man shook his head. "And with a child!"
"Could have knocked me over with a feather when I found out," the tall black man j
oined in.
"Hush, First Shirt," Gabby growled at the older man.
"And shame on you, Apollo," she told the tall black
man. "Dutch just had to find the right girl, that's all."
Apollo shrugged. "Well, I'm glad he did," he told
Dani with twinkling eyes, "because he's sure made the best vice-president any consulting firm could ask for. Shirt, when are you going to give in and join up? Semson and Drago already did. And I need someone to teach defensive driving."
"You corporate tycoons give me a pain," First Shirt scoffed. "Besides, Mrs. Darwin and I are contemplating a merger." He grinned at the blushing widow beside him, who was Gabby's mother, from Lytle, Texas. "We're going to raise cattle and sand."
"I owe it all to J.D.," Apollo said, smiling warmly at the big, dark man beside Gabby. "He got me off. Years of hiding, over. I'm glad you decided to go into law, J.D." "So am I," J.D. replied. He looked up as Dutch joined them. "I was just coming to find you. Gabby and I are starting natural childbirth classes. Any advice?"
Dutch grinned as he put an affectionate arm around Dani. "Sure. Go buy a can of tennis balls." Gabby stared at him. "Tennis...balls?" "Tennis balls." He leaned forward conspiratorially. "They're for your backache. J.D. is supposed to roll them up and down your spine."
"It really does help," Dani said. She bent and kissed her son. "The best part is when you get to hold him for the first time."
"Yes," Dutch agreed. "Let's go grill some steaks," he said. "Everybody know how to get to our place?"
"Sure," Apollo said. "I'll lead the ones who don't. You got enough steaks?"
"Shirt and Mrs. Darwin brought a boxful. If we make
you stand last in line, there should be enough to go around," he said with a grin.
Apollo glared at him. "I don't eat that much!" "Only half a ham at a time," Dutch shot back. "Remember Angola, when you ate the rabbit I'd just