Lady Victoria walked around the desk and gave Ian a hug.
“Merry Christmas, Colonel Grey,” she said.
“Merry Christmas, Lady Dallas,” replied Ian, and then he gave her a long kiss on the lips.
Second Elegy
© 2011, Bruce Edward Blackistone
What: comes she not to find me dead beneath the willow;
Rocks for my blanket and moss for my pillow;
Tumbled and Buried beneath these stones,
Whitened or mossy, but naught but bones?
Over here you’ll find me where the stream ran free;
Over there you’ll find me where the mice made free;
With fingers and fragments, and chips and flakes;
Calcium, Phosphorus; no pains, no aches.
Over here, m’love; over here come see!
She’s near I feel; still near to me.
But still. I’m still; m’love.
Be free.
In a place where Cortez fought the Dragon Quetzequatel on the steps of the largest pyramid in Mexico and George Washington equipped his men at Valley Forge with shoes made by Elvish cobblers, is it any wonder that the Victorian period in this world might hold a little magic.
The Life and Adventures of Thaddeus R. Turnbuckle Attorney at Law
© 2011,Jonathan David Baird
“A Lawyer, Gods yes I’m a Lawyer…. We live in a world full of people lobbing heads off with scimitars and gunning each other down in the street. Do you have any idea how much legal jiggery-pokery is generated by that sort of thing?”
Thaddeus looked the Troll right in the eye when he said this. He was dangling upside down from the Troll’s hand, which held him by the leg. Thaddeus had to crane his neck to catch the Troll’s eye all the while holding his kilt so that it didn’t fly down and over his face or expose himself to the young woman that stood aside looking up at the Troll wide eyed.
“This young lady has business with your Boss,” explained the harried Dwarf, “and I mean to see that we get in to see him, today”
How had he gotten into a mess like this in the first place? The girl yes, it was her fault of course. He had taken her case pro-bono because if she could be believed then the richest man in the central Mississippi basin was going to owe her a fortune and Thaddeus would be the one that brought down that pompous windbag that called himself a Senator. It might even set him up with a political career of his own. Thaddeus banished that thought from his head for the time being best to concentrate on the business at hand.
The girl had shown up at his door two days before. She looked quite a bit bewildered and seemed oddly out of place. Beyond those two obvious facts she was stunning. Jet-black hair framed her face and fell lightly on her shoulders. Her eyes were blue but not a true blue more of a violet color something that reminded Thaddeus of the sky at sunset. He could not readily decide what race she was. The eyes had a shape that suggested Asian origin but her skin color was very light and her nose was larger than any Asian’s he had seen. In fact on any other woman that nose would have seemed large but her face seemed to hang on that nose and in a way that worked to make her beautiful beyond words. She even seemed to be proud of that nose because a small gold ring hung from the nostrils like a crown. That alone would have marked this woman as out of place but her clothing, my God her clothing was not even something he had seen in a Carnival. Her blouse or shirt yes it was more like a man’s shirt was multicolored dappled with a mix of green browns and blacks. The shirt only covered her to her mid-stomach you could tell it had been made for a man because it rode up on the ample swelling of her breasts. When she moved the shirt rode a bit higher and you could just see that she had another small gold ring affixed to her navel. She was wearing pants and while you did occasionally see some rough women wearing pants these seemed as out of place as the shirt. They were indigo blue with brass rivets on the edge of the pockets. Thaddeus had seen a pair of pants like that just a year before. Yes that Archaeologist chap who had been heading west was wearing them. They had spoken several times after being introduced at the smoking club. His musing almost made Thaddeus miss the most outrageous portion of her outfit …..Her shoes.
They looked like leather but leather that had been rubbed until it almost glowed. No glowed wasn’t the word shined was the word. The boots were shiny black with three inch heels and looked a lot like the boots women were wearing in New York before he left, but these came all the way up the leg and were strapped over the legs of the pants by a row of small silver buckles. Around each buckle was a small cut out area where the blue of the pants peeked out. For some reason Thaddeus knew back in the dark perverted part of his mind that these boots were probably meant to be worn so that skin showed through those cut outs.
It was a wonder she was standing here and not in a jail cell for walking around in such a getup. Thaddeus looked up and down the street. She was lucky it was still early and the streets had not yet filled with the prim and proper Southern ladies that would have demanded that the Sheriff arrest her and the few men on the street were glaring admiringly but the last thing on their minds was calling for the Sheriff.
Thaddeus took in all this with a glance, which started at the top of her head moved down with a double take at the navel and another double take at the boots.
“Please come right in Miss?” Thaddeus questioned, he had a lot of questions but getting her off the streets seemed the right way to start the process.
She gave the Dwarf almost as complete a once over as he had given her. She seemed a bit non-pulsed at his appearance and if someone had been standing on the street corner looking at them that person would have seen almost identical expressions of surprise and bewilderment on both faces. She walked into the office and Thaddeus closed the doors almost as an afterthought he drew the curtains over the glass windows in the door and the picture window to its right. Already a small crowd had been gawking at her from across the street and he didn’t want that same crowd standing and leering at her through the windows.
She strode across the room like she owned it. Grabbing the small chair in front of his desk and sitting down in it backwards. Thaddeus hurried around to his chair and stood behind it looking at the strange girl again.
“Miss can I help you?” stammered the Dwarf who felt a out of control in this situation and that was a feeling he rarely had.
“Yes, you can you sawed off land shark,” she was obviously angry, ”I have been beaten abused and used and it’s only Tuesday.”
She didn’t look beaten thought Thaddeus and she was showing a lot of skin so a beating would show.
“Are you listening to me or are you just going to stare at my breasts all day?” She questioned and Thaddeus looked up to her face blushing just a bit with embarrassment. This girl really had a mouth on her.
“No, Miss, sorry Miss what can I help you with?” Thaddeus asked still a bit jittery.
“Ok first I noticed you’re a Lawyer at least your sign says so?” questioned the Girl.
“Yes that I am.” responded Thaddeus in a matter of fact tone now the conversation was turning more to his liking.
“Ok first, My name is Kathryn Sarah Turner,” said the girl, “I’m 27 years old I work or should I say worked as a legal assistant, that’s how I knew to go straight to a Lawyer, and I was born in 1983.”
Thaddeus again was thrown off by the strange girl. “You mean 1863 don’t you?”
“No 1983,” stated the girl flatly, “1983 almost a hundred years from now, and I don’t think my now is the same as your now. Since I got here I have seen stubby legged Dwarves like you and pointy-eared alien looking guys I assume are elves. At first I thought I got knocked over the head and woke up in a Renaissance Faire until I noticed everybody was packing heat and I saw that damn river boat. I blackout out in Atlanta Georgia in 2010 and woke up in Memphis by god hell Tennessee in 1886.”
“Look I don’t know who put you up to this joke…”Thaddeus started but never finished
She held up an object and what it did addled his mind.
Now here he was daggling from the claws of one of the most ignorant dunder headed creatures in existence but all the rage as doormen and personal bodyguards. The troll looked bewildered and Thaddeus even wondered if he spoke English. He was about to try to reason with the creature in German or maybe some Scandinavian tongue that’s where these guys generally originated from when the front door opened and what looked like a human butler stepped out. “Please Franz put down our guest.” The butler looked to Thaddeus, “Please come with me I am afraid your female companion will have to wait here for the time being. I was sent to fetch you and ask her to wait.”
Thaddeus smoothed his kilt down and grabbed his bowler hat off the ground dusting it off with a quick flip of his wrist. He was about to open his mouth to tell the Butler where to stick it that he and the girl would be seen or not at all when the Girl looked at Thaddeus and said, “Go with him you don’t need me for this anyway I’ll be ok out here with Franz.”
She seemed fine and hey who was he to argue with what the client wanted. He turned to the Butler and said “Lead on.”
Thaddeus was led down a large dark hallway corner niches were filled with the detritus of a long family history. Here a portrait of a dead relation there a suit of armor probably worn by some crusader that the family boasted about to their equally illustrious friends. Or it was all a sham a put on to fool those friends and make them think you are one of those blue blood types. Sometimes it was hard to tell but Thaddeus had a feeling this guy was the real deal and the real deal always had deep pockets. At last they came to a study lined with books and dominated by a huge dark Oak desk behind which sat the Senator. He looked almost foreboding. In fact Thaddeus thought him lanky almost to the point of cadaverous in this light. Even his eyes looked sunken and black and his cheeks had a pallor to them that one often sees on a fresh corpse. But a few years ago when Thaddeus had seen him on the campaign trail the Senator had been the picture of health and vitality. So it was probably the light playing tricks this room was dim and the corner dark. Even the air in this place seemed stifled and like a crypt.
The butler excused himself and closed the massive doors of the study leaving Thaddeus and the Senator alone in the room.
“Mr. Turnbuckle please come sit down.” The senator stood and waved Thaddeus to a seat while sitting back down in the throne like chair behind his desk. “Sorry about that scene out front of the house, good help is always hard to find.” The Senator seemed to Thaddeus’s first impression as suave and gentile as any New York flesh presser and that was high praise indeed out here in the hinterlands, but on a second look he could see the reality behind the façade here was a snake in a three piece suit.
Thaddeus took the seat and waved away an offer of a cigar from a teak wood box. The Senator did take a cigar and began puffing it between curious looks at the well-dressed Dwarven lawyer.
“Well, let me start then,” Thaddeus eased forward a bit in the chair, “What we have senator is a young girl who claims that you have misused her.” The Senator looked a bit amused at something Thaddeus had said but allowed the dwarf to continue. “Sir, if you don’t mind this is not a comical situation. You are up for election this term and if the situation that has been related to me has even the barest measure of truth in it your opponent could use it to propel him into your seat in the Senate.”
The Senator’s eyes quickly narrowed and just as quickly returned to those open smiling eyes he used to put his constituents at ease. “Now see here Mr. Turnbuckle that sounds almost like a threat.” The Senator was close to laughter, “You must know that I am a happily married man and have no young women on my staff nor do I frequent the kinds of places where women of that sort would linger.”
“The particular young girl, I am on about is not someone from around these parts and I think you know exactly what I am speaking of,” countered Thaddeus placing an object on the desk before the Senator, “Have you ever seen anything like this before?” The Senator looked down and frowned at the object. It was black with silver highlights but it wasn’t made of metal. It looked to have been made of a hard rubber or horn. On its face was a glass square inside of which a series of numbers magically spelled out the time and another series of numbers flashed but whose meaning wasn’t quite clear. Below this glass were rows of buttons some with numbers others with words and markings whose meanings also were also not quite clear.
The Senator started to reach under his desk; Thaddeus interrupted “I wouldn’t advise taking it that far yet Senator. We still have time for some discussion and you must realize that I would not come here unarmed and vulnerable if I didn’t have some sort of ace up my sleeve.” The Senator moved his hand away from the secreted gun.
“So what do you want from me Mr. Turnbuckle”, said the Senator “Is it money you want? I can set you up as one of my campaign advisors funnel you the kind of cash the likes of you only dream about. Leave the girl out in the cold, keep her as your jilly, just keep her away from me and I’ll see to it that you become an important man around here.”
The offer was tempting and Thaddeus rolled it around and around in his mind. Tempting but too dangerous the man had went for a gun too quick. Either the Senator was the kind of person that always made problems disappears or what had happened to the girl was a bigger problem for the Senator than he let on or she knew. She had told Thaddeus that she had woke up by the river that the Senator was standing over her and so were several others in robes. She had played dead and that they had taken her and dumped her just outside of town in a ditch. She had heard one of the figures use the Senators name but that was about all she knew. When they had gone she got up dusted herself off. Made a fool of herself to several passersby trying to find out where she was, and then later when she was. This all before she walked to town and to his office. From what they said she believed they thought she was dead because she didn’t act like the others…. Thaddeus did wonder who the others were.
She had proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was from when she said she was. Her…phone..She called it, had played out an orchestral piece by Beethoven then played some kind of raucous noise she called rock and roll. Hell she had even used it to take his photograph and showed him his picture on a thing she called a screen. It was a small area on the phone that actually could contain and show back pictures even moving pictures to the user. Thaddeus had heard of moving pictures before even seen some in a nickelodeon once but nothing like these in living color and everything.
“I’ll have to ponder on that question a bit,” Said Thaddeus reaching for the phone.
“I think you should leave that thing here.” The Senator leaned over and moved as if to snatch the phone away.
Thaddeus got to it first and placed it in the pocket of his waistcoat. “No better for me to have it for now. When I decide to start work for you I’ll turn over all the little baubles that she is carrying with her even the insurance because I am sure I can trust you on a matter of honor like this.” Said Thaddeus giving the Senator a slight wink. The Senator looked pleased and Thaddeus was sure he had convinced him that he was going to take the offer and he got up to leave. About halfway to the door the Senator spoke up, “I will expect you tomorrow for the conclusion of our deal.”
When Thaddeus turned back to look the senator was standing and his eyes looked more like inky black pools than they had before. Thaddeus almost wanted to cross himself his skin was literally crawling and all at once knew that the Senator had just sent some magic or cantrip at him. Thaddeus knew that the next words he spoke would have to be true. He didn’t know how he knew it but he knew that if those words were not true that the Senator would know and that He would not leave that house alive.
“Yes we will conclude our Business tomorrow. I hope it will be concluded satisfactorily.” said Thaddeus as he stepped out the door and forced himself to walk a brisk but natural pace to the front of the house. At the front door the butler saw
him out. What Thaddeus had said was true but all the while he was saying concluded satisfactorily he was thinking it will be concluded to MY satisfaction and that was a true statement as far as he was concerned.
The scene in front of the house was almost surreal. Thaddeus wasn’t sure of what he was seeing. Kate was on her tiptoes and was rubbing the back of the troll’s ears. The troll Franz was… well the best way to put it is he was purring not a cat’s purr more like something that would come out of the throat of a jungle cat or even a lion. Kate caught a glimpse of Thaddeus and stopped. Franz came back to himself and blushed beat red and on a big dark yellow troll a beat read face looked rather absurd.
“Never mind explaining what you’re doing,” Said Thaddeus, “We need to go now.” Climbing aboard his buckboard.
When she was on the wagon and they were headed down the drive from the Senator’s mansion Kate said wistfully, “Do you know how much Body Mods like that guy had cost where I’m from? God he looked so hardcore.”
“That guy as you put it is a seven foot tall troll and that body he has, he was born with it.” said Thaddeus, “And if you like your body intact you might want to keep your hands to yourself and your legs crossed. Human women don’t live through childbirth when they sire a troll’s baby.”
Monsters, Magic, and Machines (The SteamGoth Anthology Book 1) Page 9