The two brothers furthest from us met my gaze straight away, their expressions surprised but also curious. They both had partners, nice-looking women who appeared to be aged in their thirties. One of the women smiled tentatively at me and I smiled back, then the brother holding her hand nodded at me.
I might have tried to smile at the other brother but the man closest to us cleared his throat. It was an angry sound, more like a growl. Or a threat.
I looked up at him. And I do mean up. If Jake was tall, this man was a giant. An angry giant. He was an unattractive shade of red. Despite that, there was no mistaking the family resemblance, although he looked old enough to be an uncle instead of a brother. His hair was thinning and receding and hard lines were etched into his face.
“How dare you,” he whispered, but it came out more like a threatening rumble.
A petite woman I’d only just noticed on his other side tugged on his arm. “Joel, that’s enough.”
Her appeal didn’t have much effect, and he shook her off. She wasn’t just petite, she was tiny. A slip of a woman with haunting green eyes and a sophisticated blond bob.
“Oh, right,” I said casually, “you must be that brother.”
Chapter 38
Joel narrowed his eyes at me. “I’m only going to ask you to leave once.”
“That’s good,” I said, darting a glance at Jake, who was still staring straight ahead but with a muscle twitching in his jaw. “That means I’ll only have to ignore you the once.”
Shock widened Joel’s eyes to saucers, and I noticed they were bloodshot, too. I doubted it was from grief. More like a perpetual state of anger.
He turned to face me slowly and I made no attempt to move. I didn’t shy away like my body was urging me to do—like I really, really wanted to. I stood my ground.
Joel cast his furious gaze over my head at Jake.
“Get her out of here, Jake. This isn’t a red carpet.”
“We’re not going anywhere.” Jake was still looking straight ahead but his voice was firm. “I have a right to grieve my father.”
“No, you don’t!” The word echoed around the tent. “You lost that right when you walked out on us!”
Pretty much everybody was watching us. We had become the sort of spectacle you couldn’t look away from despite it being inappropriate to stare.
Joel went to move around me—to get to Jake, no doubt—but I darted in front of him again.
He bared his teeth like he was preparing to fight, which he probably was.
“You mean Jake didn’t want to be on your team anymore?” I accused.
“What? No.” He shook his head like he was annoyed by the presence of a mosquito. No prizes for guessing who the mosquito was.
“Don’t deny it,” I continued. “When he stopped playing football, you didn’t want to have anything to do with him.”
“Because he gave up!” he roared.
I stiffened but stayed where I was. Jake’s brother really did have a lot of unresolved anger issues.
“I didn’t give up, Joel.” Jake came to stand by my side.
“You’re right,” Joel spat. “You betrayed us. That was worse.”
“Betrayed you?” I gaped. “Are you for real? Jake giving up football was a betrayal?”
“Yes, of course it was. We believed in him and he threw it all away—”
“Because you bullied him, you big oaf!” I leapt forward and prodded a finger into his chest. “Did you ever ask him if he liked it? Even once? Because newsflash: he didn’t! He hated it.”
Joel frowned, the lines on his forehead caving in on each other as he processed my words. But I wasn’t done yet.
“And do you know how hard it was to walk away for him? Do you? You have absolutely no idea! Jake is one of the best actors in America, which means he has a pretty damn good grasp of his emotions, unlike you. Yet he still can’t talk about this. You betrayed him. You turned your back on him because he didn’t live up to your expectations.”
“Ally.” Jake grabbed my waist and pulled me back. “It’s OK. Leave it.”
I reeled on him, tears welling in my eyes. “It’s not OK! Do you hear me? It’s. Not. OK. They’re your family. Families are supposed to love you no matter what. Whether you’re the biggest movie star in the entire world or you choose to do carpentry for a living. It doesn’t matter. They love you. Period. End of story.” I whirled around again. “You betrayed Jake! You failed him. So don’t give me some bullshit story about Jake walking away, because you gave him no choice. The only way for him to stop doing something he hated, something that was making him sick, was to walk.”
Joel’s mouth gaped open like a big, cavernous hole, and he didn’t say anything. I could hear the crowd murmuring behind us and even caught a few who-is-she’s. Ignoring everyone, I grabbed Jake’s hand again and turned us to face the front, then nodded at the pastor like I was giving him a signal to commence the service.
Despite’s Jake’s slightly paler-than-usual complexion, his lips twitched.
The pastor nodded grimly—like it wasn’t the first time he’d witnessed a family meltdown at a funeral service—and cleared his throat.
To my relief, everyone remained silent. For several minutes I could feel Joel’s death stare penetrating my skull, but I didn’t give him the satisfaction of acknowledging him. I tried not to roll my eyes when he was asked to give what turned out to be quite a moving eulogy.
By the time the service wrapped up, my heart rate had returned to normal but my palm in Jake’s felt unusually sweaty.
Jake leaned in close to my ear. “Come on, let’s slip away while we still can.”
I nodded in agreement. I’d caused enough trouble for one day and I was surprised Jake was still speaking to me.
We’d almost made it to the exit of the tent when Jake’s good manners failed us.
“Jake. I’m sorry about your father.”
A broad-shouldered, graying older man extended his hand toward Jake.
Jake froze. I saw the panic in his cool blue eyes before he covered it expertly and flashed one of his full-wattage, movie-star smiles. “Rob. Thanks for coming.” He reached over and they shook hands.
I groaned inwardly. Now was not the time to start a conversation. Jake had been put on the spot but we really needed to get out of here. I tugged on his other arm gently.
“Um, Jake? Remember we said we had to get going?” I reminded him.
“What? Oh, yeah. Right.” His smile tightened and I could see him trying to formulate a suitable excuse, but Rob was now talking about a friend of the family.
I was contemplating saying I was sick and needed to leave when an arm wrapped around Jake’s shoulders.
“Just telling your old coach how much you hated football, hey?” Joel’s face was back to a more human color, but I noticed his eyes weren’t. They still flared with hatred.
Rob looked between the two brothers, confusion creasing his forehead. “What’s that you say? Jake didn’t like football?”
“Apparently not,” Joel went on. “Loathed it, as it turns out.”
I darted a glance at Jake. His smile was gone and it took me a moment to recognize his expression. Oh. That zombie movie. The one where he’d had to hunt down and kill the undead.
“Joel, that’s enough,” said Jake quietly.
Joel smiled at us, the sinister curve of his lips making me shudder. “Oh, I don’t know. I think it’s time we caught up properly. So, Jake. When did you start hating it so much?”
Rob interrupted. “You hated it?”
Jake dropped his eyes to his feet and didn’t say anything, but I saw the way his fists were clenched hard against his legs.
“Don’t be shy, bro,” Joel said. “Now I think about it, I don’t know why I didn’t work it out earlier, you being a famous movie star and all. You’re a good actor, aren’t you? Had us fooled.”
“Jake. Is it true?” Rob asked, his voice rough with age or emotion, I couldn’t quite te
ll. “Did you really not like it?”
Jake met Rob’s gaze and I saw the defeat in his eyes. “No. I didn’t.”
Joel, who was still holding Jake around the shoulder, patted his arm. “There you go. Feels good to have it out in the open now, doesn’t it? So, how old were you, huh? High school? College? Pressure become too much for you, did it?”
What a condescending prick. I imagined he’d taunted Jake just like that when they were kids, too. Once again I was grateful for my only child status.
“The beginning,” Jake replied. “I hated it right from the beginning.”
That shut his stupid big brother up.
Rob shook his head. “You never liked it?”
“No.” Jake found his voice again and his response was clear and firm. “Even when I was four, I didn’t enjoy it.”
Joel dropped his arm from Jake’s shoulders like he’d been stung. “You never liked it?”
Jake answered with a challenging stare.
Joel stepped back. “I don’t get it,” he said, almost to himself. “You were good at it.”
“Yes, I was. But it’s not my passion,” Jake said simply. “Acting is.”
Joel’s face contorted in disbelief. “Acting is? Acting? Your career is a joke, do you hear me? A fucking joke. You prance around on-screen in superhero costumes and earn millions of dollars because you look good. That’s not passion. That’s luck. But you were good at football. Genuinely good. And you threw all that way because you didn’t enjoy it? You’re a fucking spoiled brat, do you know that?”
The sound of conversation dropped away again and we were once more center stage. At least Jake was used to it and he seemed unperturbed.
“No, I wasn’t spoiled. I was bullied, as Ally has already pointed out. Bullied into doing something I never wanted to do in the first place. Who cares if I was good at it?”
“Who cares?” Joel bellowed, and I thought I saw the tent walls puffing out a bit. “We cared! Dad cared. I cared!” He was jabbing his chest with his own finger this time, saving me the trouble.
“Why?” Jake demanded.
Joel blinked. “What?”
“Why did you care?”
“Because I’m your brother. Because I’m your family!” he sputtered.
Jake shook his head like he’d just tasted something bitter. “Then where have you been the last twelve years of my life?”
When Joel didn’t reply, Jake nodded at Rob and grabbed my hand.
At the door to the tent, Joel’s voice followed us. “If you leave,” he threatened, “you’re dead to me.”
Jake shrugged. “What’s changed?” He pushed aside the flap that was shielding us from curious onlookers and cameras.
“No, Jake. Don’t go.”
The murmuring in the tent fell completely silent at the sound of a female’s voice. Jake turned slowly, but I didn’t need to. I already knew who it was.
It was her.
“Sally?”
The impossibly tiny woman who’d stood beside Joel earlier pushed her way through the crowd. It was the first time I noticed properly what she was wearing: a white tailored skirt and matching jacket. All white. Which was incredibly unusual for a funeral—or poor taste depending on your opinion—but I understood her choice of wardrobe immediately.
Defiance.
I wanted to hate her, but I just couldn’t. She had style and balls. They were the best accessories a woman could have, in my opinion.
Sally arrived in front of Joel and fixed him with a steely green-eyed gaze. “You’re embarrassing everyone in your family with your behavior today, Joel Swan, and I’m glad we’re getting a divorce. Your father would be ashamed.” She turned to us. “Joel is jealous. He always has been. He was good at football, but never as good as you, Jake. It’s a bitter pill that’s eaten him up all these years.”
“You bitch.” Before any of us had time to react, Joel hit out at her.
The back of his palm connected with the side of Sally’s cheek. It sent her sprawling and some of the other female guests cried out in shock and surprise.
Jake rushed to Sally’s side.
I stood, transfixed, all the fight gone out of me. I watched as Joel shook his head in disgust and walked away. To my relief I saw the other two brothers cutting through the crowd to chase after him. I hoped it wasn’t to cheer him on.
A crowd of people formed around Sally and Jake, including the two women I recognized as the other brothers’ partners.
I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Come on.”
I blinked at the sight of Faith beside me. I’d almost forgotten she was here. She led me out of the tent and down the pathway until we arrived at a nondescript black sedan. Faith leaned against the passenger door, rifling through her black handbag for something.
“Cigarette?” she asked.
I shook my head, then saw that we were being watched and my eyes widened.
Faith cast a derisive glance at the media waiting near the cemetery gates and lit a cigarette. When she’d released a long puff she looked at me. “Forget about them. Let them take a few shots of us. Me and you, all buddy-buddy together at Jake’s dad’s funeral? That ought to fuck them up.”
In spite of myself, I smiled. “Yeah.”
“You know who she was, don’t you?” Faith asked after another exhale.
I nodded.
“Has Jake spoken about her?”
I shook my head, my conversational abilities deserting me.
Faith huffed, like she was annoyed on my behalf. She watched a spiral of smoke fade. “The legendary high school sweetheart.”
Chapter 39
“How much do you know?” Faith asked me.
“Only what I read online,” I answered numbly. My mind kept replaying the image of Joel hitting Sally and Jake rushing to her side.
“So you know that she left him?”
“Yes. While he was in a coma.” Saying the words out loud didn’t make them any less disturbing.
“Pretty low, huh? He wakes up and she’s gone. Maybe she thought he wouldn’t remember her when he woke up,” she quipped. At my sharp look, Faith shrugged. “She was in love with the idea of him, Ally. Like the rest of his family.”
I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. I was too busy trying to understand but I wasn’t sure I ever would.
“I fell in love with the idea of him, too,” Faith added. “At first.”
That got my attention and I gestured for the cigarette like my life depended on it. After Faith handed it to me, I took a long drag and choked.
She took the cigarette away from me and politely ignored me struggling for breath. “But then I got to know him better and discovered we were better friends than anything else.”
“I knew it!” I said, still coughing and sputtering.
Faith patted my shoulder. “Surely you’ve figured that out by now, though? Everyone likes the idea of falling in love with Jacob Swan.”
I put a hand to my forehead because my head hurt. I’d stopped coughing but now my eyes were watering from the stupid cigarette. “It still doesn’t excuse what his girlfriend did next,” I said hoarsely, discovering I didn’t actually want to say her name.
“Yeah,” Faith agreed. “I’ve got to admit that was pretty low.”
“It was fucked up.”
Faith’s dark eyebrows shot up. “I like it when you’re feisty. Jake needs a bit of that now and then. But yeah, ditching him when he was in a coma and then getting engaged to his older brother? Not so nice.”
“Nice! I can’t even imagine. No wonder all of his Hollywood relationships have been superficial. You’d never trust anyone again.”
“He trusts you.”
I shook my head fiercely. “No. He doesn’t.”
Instead of arguing, Faith studied me thoughtfully. “Why do you say that?”
“Because he didn’t tell me about his father.”
Faith dropped the rest of the cigarette and crushed it under her towering, black high
heel. “Oh, that,” she said, like it was nothing. “He wouldn’t have told anyone about that.”
“Except you,” I accused.
“Relax. When I was at the café with him he received a call from one of the brothers he still talks to occasionally. Even he’s not that good an actor.”
I fell silent again. To my surprise, Faith didn’t try to continue the conversation. She relaxed against the car beside me, taking in the eerie view of the graves. After a while she spoke.
“Give him a chance,” she said.
“Do you think he still loves her?” I hated myself for even asking it.
“What? No.” Faith’s contemptuous expression told me what she thought of that idea. “No way. You don’t come back from something like that. Trust me.” Her eyes had turned a darker shade of brown and there was a hard certainty to her tone. I had the feeling she was speaking from experience.
“Jake's not the problem,” I said with a sigh. “It’s everything else.”
Faith nodded knowingly. “It’s a strange life. What do you think the headlines will read tomorrow? ‘Faith Martin and Allegra Valenti mourn unrequited love’? Or how about ‘Up and coming fashion designer dying to dress Faith Martin’?”
I scoffed out loud at the last one. “You wish.”
She grinned. “Oh, come on. You’d love to dress me.”
“In a white pantsuit,” I threatened.
Faith laughed. “You’d make it look good, I’m sure.”
“You mean that?” I asked, almost shyly, my bravado evaporating.
“Hell, yeah. You’ve got style. If you can get over the fact you hate me, I’d let you dress me.”
“I don’t hate you!”
She shrugged. “Less now maybe. You didn’t like me at first.”
“I didn’t think you liked me,” I protested.
“I don’t decide I like anyone for a while. I have to figure them out first.”
And suddenly I understood. Faith Martin trusted no one. Whether it was because she’d been in the business too long, or because someone had damaged her heart, her toughness wasn’t a front. It ran to the very core of her and I pitied the man brave enough to chip away at that amount of armor. I actually felt sorry for her. As stunning and talented as she was, Faith needed a friend, and Jake was trying to be that friend.
Heartthrob (Hollywood Hearts, #1) Page 27