Secrets in the Lyrics

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Secrets in the Lyrics Page 9

by Sm Donaldson


  I look back and forth at Nana and Naomi. Nana puts her hand on mine. “Honey, there ain’t no secrets in this house. As a matter of fact, just this mornin’ I told Scarlet and Ryder if they don’t quit spending so much time naked in that bedroom up there, I’m gonna be a great-grandma.”

  Scarlet rolls her eyes as I bark out a laugh. “Okay, it’s more than friendship. I’m just not ready to put a label on it yet. I’ve screwed up so many times in my life with men, and I couldn’t bear the thought of messing up what I have with Gable. So, he’s being patient with me.”

  “What is it with these kids and their ‘no labels’ stuff? I just don’t get it, Naomi.”

  Naomi looks up. “Well, look at Ryder, that boy couldn’t keep his pants on to save his life, until he met this beauty here. I guess it’s all about finding the right person and until they do that, it’s their no labels rule. That’s like Judd. That boy, I know he was seeing a girl before he left, has he been forthcoming about any of it? No. He told me they were just hanging out. Whatever that means.”

  Scarlet stands up. “Come on, Ivie, I’ll show you the house.”

  I stand up. “Okay, sure.” What is she up to?

  As soon as we are out of the kitchen, she looks at me. “Okay, I’ll need your help tonight. Judd is Ryder’s best friend. Well, you met my friend Annabelle, she’s coming here later. She’s the girl Judd was seeing before he left, but we don’t need all the grown-ups knowing that. He’d kill me and Ryder. He’s private, kinda like my brother.”

  “Scarlet, we are grown-ups.”

  “Not compared to them. I mean really, you saw how they questioned you for my brother, who they hardly know. Can you imagine Judd’s mom or Nana with Annabelle?”

  I laugh, “Good point. So diversion is the game, then.”

  She nods. “Yep.”

  “Got it.”

  “Ivie, I am glad you’re here and I’m glad you and Gable are together.”

  Hearing Scarlet and Ivie laughing together when they came outside to get us was like music to my ears. They seem to have come to peace with things.

  Sitting down at Ryder’s massive dining room table, Ivie looks over at me and whispers. “Oh, the ladies know about us. Scarlet called me out and Nana beat it out of me.” She laughs. “But they know we don’t have a label.”

  Scarlet looks up as my mom walks in. “Oh, hey, Mom. Nana and Naomi, this is my big brother, Gable. You know, the one we talked about in the kitchen.”

  Naomi laughs and Nana looks at me. “Oh yeah, Ivie’s friend with no labels.”

  Ryder almost spits his beer out. “Nana, chill out.”

  “I am chilled out.”

  He shakes his head and I laugh. “Yes ma’am, that’s me. Although I want labels, someone is being cautious.”

  My mom looks like she’s entered a television talk show audience the way she’s watching us.

  Nana looks at Dustin. “So, now Dustin, what is it like for the gay people these days?”

  Ryder chokes and Dustin laughs. “It’s getting better, Nana.”

  Greer, Ryder’s dad, looks at Nana. “Momma, you are making everyone uncomfortable.”

  We all laugh when she swats his hand. “No, Ivie, I see that lovely artwork poking out of your shirt sleeve, what is it?”

  Ivie pulls up her sleeve a little. “Oh, it’s just a little music tattoo, nothing big. All the guys have way more than I do.”

  “I wanna get a tattoo.”

  Ryder laughs. “Nana, you’re too old to be going and getting tattoos.”

  “I’m not too old for anything.”

  The rest of dinner is spent with Nana’s quips and everyone’s laughter. When we were eating dessert, Ryder gave Scarlet her promise ring, and she almost freaked out thinking he was going to purpose. Which he basically did. I’m not real sure about the promise ring thing, it was all kinda weird to me. He wants her to move in here, too.

  Mom decides to tell us that she’s moving to Augusta with a man she’s been seeing. This makes all of us happy for her. Scar and I never really thought she’d ever move on from our dad, but I’m glad she is.

  I decide to share my news and everyone is happy. I almost choke up when Naomi comes over to hug me. She looks at me with tears in her eyes. “You be careful over there. I know you guys are supposed to be safe, but just take care, your sister needs you back here. If you happen to run into my son, you tell him I said the same to him.”

  Later, on the way back to my mom’s house, I look at Ivie. “So, I’m glad you and my sister seem to be getting closer.”

  “Yeah, she’s lightened up since she’s with Ryder. Maybe it’s all that sex Nana was telling me they’ve been having.”

  I almost run the car off the road. “Shit, I don’t want to hear that. His grandma knows about it?”

  She laughs telling me about Nana calling them out this morning. Now I have to say that is funny. She’s a tough old lady, I like her.

  “Well, as long as he doesn’t knock up my little sister, we’ll be okay. Oh shit, speaking of that, you have your doctor’s appointment set up for while we’re home, right?”

  “I didn’t but Annabelle said she’s pretty sure she can get me in with her doctor on the 28th. I guess she’s a family friend. She said with me going out of the country, it’d probably be best if I went to someone besides the clinic. That way he can kinda check me over, to be on the safe side.”

  “Yeah, that’s a good idea. I mean we should be careful, you know? We have a lot riding on this tour.”

  She laughs. “Well you’re the one who gets so carried away.”

  I rub my forehead. “Yeah, I know.” The 28th jogs my brain. “Hey, don’t let me forget to call the bar about us doing a show there on the 28th.”

  She nods. “Yeah, sounds good.”

  Once we are back at my mom’s house, she and I exchange gifts that neither one of us knew we’d picked up for each other. Sitting in the living room, I suggest we watch a movie. She smiles. “Okay, what did you have in mind?”

  “How about something scary?”

  “Really, on Christmas Eve, you want something scary?”

  “No, really I just want you to snuggle with me.”

  She laughs, “Well all you had to do was ask.”

  She scoots closer to me and we start watching some cheesy Christmas movie.

  After about an hour she’s dozed off. Picking her up in my arms, I take her to my room. She smiles, “Hmm, I like this.”

  I lean over her. “Oh, you do? Do you want me to do more?”

  She nods. “Oh yeah. Let’s make it a Very Merry Christmas.”

  I laugh. “Sure thing.” I start stripping my clothes off.

  She puts her hand out to stop me. “No, I’m in charge tonight.”

  Damn that’s a turn on. “Baby, you keep bossing me around and I may blow before we ever get started.”

  She stands up and pushes me back on the bed. While I’m naked, she still has her clothes on. “Hey, are you gonna lose the clothes?”

  “Shh, I’m in charge.” She slowly starts taking her clothes off.

  After what feels like an eternity, she crawls on top of me, and if my dick gets any harder, it’s going to explode.

  She slowly slides her pussy down on my cock and it starts out slow, up and down. Up and down. She leans over me and starts riding me harder and harder.

  She’s slick with her own wetness and I feel like we are both about to explode. She’s riding me faster and I grab her hips. Suddenly, she makes an erotic move with her hips and my dick slides out of her. The next thing I know pain shoots through my body.

  “ARGH!”

  She freezes. “Are you okay? Oh my god, I think I broke your dick.”

  I roll to the side, now holding my limp dick. In some roll with her hips, it felt like she bent my dick in half.

  I look up at her with tears leaking from my eyes. “I think I blacked out and I think you may have broken him.”

  She looks scared and she
’s trying to touch me. “Do I need to call a doctor or something?”

  “Babe, if you call the doctor, they are going to laugh us out of the ER.”

  “I’m so sorry, so sorry.”

  A few minutes later, after the pain has stopped throbbing through my junk, I start laughing. “Holy crap, we are like the Special Olympics of sex right now.”

  She can’t help it, she starts laughing, too. “Are we insane? Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “Probably yes on both questions.” I’m still laughing. “Okay, but if you ever tell the guys this happened, I’ll spank your ass.”

  “Really? Do you think I want to tell the guys that I’m a dick breaker? Literally.”

  We both burst out laughing again.

  She smiles. “Do I need to check on him?”

  I instinctively put my hand over myself. “Um no. He’s going to be out for the night.”

  We both keep laughing until we fall asleep.

  I would really like to go back to Christmas Eve and start this week over. First, I thought I broke

  Gable’s dick. He was in pain, I could see it. I was concerned and embarrassed. At least before it was over with, we could laugh about it. Then, my mother called again on Christmas Day and come to find out, she’s running low on money because her latest money ticket kicked her out. She saw that I’m in a band that’s on tour, actually she knew I played in Biloxi, but she just didn’t have time to make my show. Yesterday, I got a phone call that Chad was out on some kind of house arrest until his trial. Now, the lovely doctor I’m seeing just came in here to tell me that I’m pregnant, she did an ultrasound to see how far along I am and I’m five weeks. So this must’ve happened the first time we forgot a condom. I just laid back and cried, my life is too much sometimes. She’s giving me a few minutes and she’ll be back in to talk. I hear the door rattle and I know my few minutes are up.

  She sits down next to me and gently touches my hand. “Ivie, everything is going to be okay. I can tell you weren’t expecting this.”

  I shake my head. “No. This is not a good time at all. I’m leaving in a week to go on a USO tour in the Middle East. They won’t let me do that if I’m pregnant.”

  She rubs my arm. “Well, you have other options. I will say you should talk to the father about your decision, unless you don’t have a relationship with him.”

  Oh my God, Gable. What am I going to tell him? This is all wrong. We can’t do this. “I have a relationship with him. Thank you for being so kind.”

  “Well, if you decide to terminate, we don’t perform that procedure in this practice, but I have a friend who is an OBGYN and I can give you his number. I don’t personally have anything against it, that was just the policy set in place when I started working here.”

  I nod. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you again, but I really need to go, I have some things to think about.”

  She smiles. “Okay, well once you decide, let me know and I’ll get you the number. I do know the earlier you decide, the easier it will be on you mentally and physically.”

  I nod as she leaves the room. What in the hell am I going to say to Gable? What if he hates me? What if he never wants to see me again? What do I really want to do about this? Do I want to keep this baby? That means giving up everything I’ve ever worked for. It will all be gone. I can’t ask the band to wait for me, I can’t ask them to give up this tour, this opportunity. Once again, I’m the fuck up of the group.

  I sit in one of the Historic District’s many squares until it’s time for us to perform. I can’t face the guys about this right now. I’ll just get through tonight and then figure this out.

  Before we go on stage, I can tell Gable wants to talk to me. He finally corners me about the time we are walking to the stage. “Hey, how did your appointment go today?”

  I am about to cry, I know it. “Um, it went fine. Come on, we can’t be late getting started.”

  We make it through our set. We stop at the bar to talk to Dottie and she offers us a round on the house. “I’ll just have some water, I’m really thirsty.”

  Gable walks around to me. “Hey, is something wrong? Do you wanna talk?”

  “I’m fine, just tired tonight. I think I’m going to head on out.”

  “Wait, where are you gonna go? Why don’t you wait for me and I’ll go with you.”

  “No, you should visit with Dottie. Between Mom calling and all of that crap, I just have a headache. I’ll head back to your house, we can talk when you get there.”

  He nods. “Okay, well call my cell if you need me.”

  “Okay.”

  ~*~*~

  After getting to Gable’s, I take a long shower. Well, I mostly sat in the shower and cried. I have to tell Gable and it’s the hardest damn thing.

  Walking into his room, I open my towel, looking at myself naked in the full length mirror. What will I look like pregnant? Will I gain a ton of weight?

  “You look just as shitty as you looked when you left me.”

  That voice, “Ch-Chad, what are you doing here? You can’t be near me.” I close my towel, clutching it tight.

  He walks to me grabbing my arm. “You are coming with me. Once I’m done with you, no one will recognize you to ID your body.”

  “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

  “Because you fucked up my life.”

  I look around the room to see if there is anything I can use as a weapon. I see a bat by the door, there is a huge lamp on the night stand, and a jagged looking statue thing on his TV stand.

  “Can I at least put some clothes on?”

  “Yeah, put some fucking clothes on, I can’t stand looking at your fat ass.”

  I reach for some clothes and I touch the icon with Gable’s number. Hopefully Gable will try to figure out why I don’t talk to him when he answers.

  Pulling on some yoga pants and a t-shirt, I try to work my way over to the lamp or something. I’m worried that if I ever leave here with him, I will never make it back.

  He moves closer to me. “Let’s go”

  I start walking towards the door and I reach over, grabbing the bat. “Back away from me, Chad. Just leave.”

  He laughs. “Do you really think that bat is going to scare me away?”

  The next few minutes go by in slow motion and in warp speed all at one time, between the hitting, kicking, punching and being thrown across the room.

  I feel my stomach cramping really bad and I feel a hot gush in between my legs. I have to protect this baby until Gable knows. I finally manage to grab the large lamp and knock him over the head with it. He stumbles but runs back towards me. I grab a large shard of the lamp and drive it straight into his chest.

  I fall backward and darkness takes me over.

  The next thing I know, I hear Gable far away. “Ivie, baby hang on. You’re in the ambulance.”

  I hear the paramedics asking him questions, but I can’t make any of them out.

  Darkness takes me over again.

  On my way home from the bar, my phone started ringing. I look down to see Ivie’s face on the screen.

  “Hello, beauty.”

  She doesn’t say anything, but I hear noise in the background. “Back away from me, Chad. Just leave.”

  “Do you really think that bat is going to scare me away?”

  I automatically floor it as I hear screaming in the back ground along with stuff crashing around. Then the phone disconnects.

  “SHIT!”

  I call 911 and pray to God that she’s at my house.

  I skid into the driveway as the cops do. Running inside, I make it to my bedroom. There is busted shit everywhere. I see Ivie on the floor and there is blood all over the place. Looking at her, I can’t tell which of it is hers and what of it is his.

  Chad is lying on the floor and I see a large piece of glass jammed into his chest. He’s gasping and gurgling. I hope the son-of-a-bitch dies. I run my hands over Ivie. I don’t see that she’s stabbed, but I still see blood co
ming from somewhere.

  Everything is happening at once. The paramedics get here to load them up and I jump into the ambulance with Ivie. Once we’re moving, I call my sister to meet us and let the guys know.

  “Ivie, baby hang on. You’re in the ambulance.”

  Her eyes flutter a little. The paramedics start asking me questions about allergies and medical conditions.

  Finally, once we make it to the hospital, we are rushed in. I overhear the doctors saying that Chad coded on the way here and wasn’t able to be brought back. I can’t say it bothers me.

  The doctor steps over to me. “Sir, are you with Ms. Butonelli?”

  “Yes, I’m her only family. Is she okay? There was so much blood.”

  “Yes, we located the source of the bleeding and she is being moved up the fourth floor to take care of everything.”

  “Okay, can I go up?”

  “Once she’s in her room yes, but they have to do a small procedure before they can allow visitors.”

  “What kind of procedure?”

  “I’m sorry sir, that’s all I can say. The nurse will let you know when you can head up.”

  For the next hour I sit there on pins and needles, waiting for the nurse to come talk to me. My sister, Ryder, and the guys come in.

  I look at Scar, “There was so much blood her pants were soaked, I don’t know if he stabbed her or what. I’m scared.”

  Just then the nurse comes in to let me know that we can go up for a few minutes.

  When the elevator doors open to the fourth floor, I storm out. Right before I reach her room, Scarlet grabs my arm.

  She’s looking around the halls. “Gable, you said Ivie’s pants were soaked in blood, nothing else.”

  I just need to get in her room. “Yeah.”

  “Gable, look what floor we are on.”

  I look around, finally taking in the area. It’s the Maternity floor. I burst into Ivie’s room. She’s sedated still looking at her face.

  Scarlet grabs my hand and locks it in hers. “Gable, had she told you?”

  “No, she had a doctor’s appointment today with the doctor Annabelle told her about.”

 

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