by Manda Scott
He had been the best hawk-scout of his generation and Valerius had treated him as an arrogant hound whelp in need of training. The men of the horned god saw him the same. She thought that Valerius might have been right, but that the journey to Mona and all that had happened there had changed him so that now the deer-men were making a mistake. She was not certain that they would treat him any differently if they could be made to understand that.
Gunovar finished her bannock and wiped her fingers on her tunic. She said, “They will make him the Horned One, with paint and antlers, and have him dance with me, and mate at the end of it. If he will not dance, or refuses the mating, they will flay him and use his skin to cover one of their own who will do it instead. If he does as they ask, and dances well, they will kill him differently, and keep it short, so that his death fills only the time just after dawn when the sun and the horned moon share the sky.” She splayed her fingers, so that they could see the scars where they had been broken. “It helps to know,” she said. “If I were you, I would dance when they ask it, and everything else. I will not hold it against you.”
Hawk’s head turned on his shoulders, smoothly, like an owl’s. “How?” he asked. “How differently will they kill me if I do as they want?”
“As they have started, with knives. Or with the fire. I believe you will be allowed to choose.”
“That’s what our mothers told us,” said Hawk. He sounded surprised, almost relieved. “You were right. It is easier to know.” He hesitated a moment, then sat down to join them, and accepted one of the burnt bannocks and let Efnís and Dubornos draw him into conversation about the cave and the way it had been painted and the talk drifted into other things and he did not go back to looking out at the darkness.
After a while, when nothing had yet happened but that more deer-men came and built the fire higher, he asked Dubornos and Efnís to help him braid his hair after the manner of the Eceni, with a warrior’s knot at the side and a single black kill-feather woven in at the temple. Efnís gave him a necklace to wear with amber beads carved in the shapes of dream-animals; six-legged bears followed wildcats with long teeth and otters that held snakes between their jaws. Bellos had an armband in bronze that sat well on Hawk’s arm and Gunovar took some red wool from the edging of her tunic and bound it about the quill of the feather to mark him as one who had saved others in battle at the risk of his own life. He looked quite different when they were done.
Dubornos said, “They want you as Coritani, not as Eceni.”
Hawk grinned. “Then they can change me. But they will know they have done it.”
The rite of the horned god began with three young women painted all in black spirals who played whistling pipes carved from deer horn that made low, fluted noises like night birds.
The music looped up and down, weaving laceworks of sound that encircled Hawk as a net circles the salmon, and drew him away from the others to stand by the fire. They made him stand in the north, the place of the hunter, of the warrior, of the horned god. The leader was the same one who had taken them in the beginning. He stood, and, for all his strength, was smaller than Hawk, and his hair did not gleam on his head, nor was the bronze of his skin set off by the armband of the same colour and the flowing amber about his neck. He bore no kill-feathers, red-banded or not, and was less for it, and must have known it.
Hawk said, “The Coritani worship the Horned One above everything except Briga. Even so, we do not send unwilling life to any god.”
“Nor do we. When you understand what we ask of the gods and they of us, you will embrace your death willingly. The music and the dance alone will make it easy.”
Three young men, painted in white lines, brought Gunovar to join him. She was lame from the Roman inquisitors and had done nothing to adorn herself and still she looked regal. With care, they removed the dreamer’s thong from her brow and gave her a neckband instead made of the backbones of deer.
The deer-warriors made a corridor, and two at the front took the skulls and tapped on them with bones to set up a rhythm, as the bear-dancers did on their skull drums, but less discordantly.
The elder took his knife and made a third cut on Hawk, who stood still and let him do it. The man stepped back and grunted and was half deer again.
“Outside. Everybody.” His arms swung wide. “All of us, from youngest to oldest, will dance to meet the god outside, under the stars and the horned moon.”
CHAPTER 35
IN THE LAND OF THE CORNOVII, ONLY ARDACOS COULD travel safely.
The pathmakers of the Brigantes were fast and silent and left no trail but they did not see the scout who watched from a hillside. Ardacos saw him and found him and killed him and returned with a Cornovi knife, with a deer’s foot hilt, as proof. Breaca thanked the pathmakers and sent them back to Venutios.
Soon after that, Ardacos left his horse on open land where it could be found by others and went on foot, ranging from side to side on the rolling heath and into the open weave of the forest, leaving marks that only Cygfa could find. Breaca followed her lead, as safe or as dangerous as it might be; she could do nothing else, nor speed their travel. Miraculously, she felt herself free of all responsibility for the first time since she had come east from Mona to the lands of the Eceni.
It was an illusion, but she accepted the gift of its freedom and chose not to think deeply on what they were nearing, or the failed quest behind, or the question that Venutios had offered as an unexpected, unwanted gift.
With Cygfa ahead and Stone at her heel, she rode fast on small paths, or no paths at all, heading south and a little west. The gritstone and heather moors of the meeting place became high limestone crags and deep clefted valleys with forest eaten at the edges by the axes of the legions, but not yet reduced all to farmland.
Near evening, under a clear sky with the sun vastly red on the horizon, they saw Ardacos for the first time since he had abandoned his horse. He sat on a fallen birch, eating flowers of cow parsley and elder, so that his lips were dusted in yellow and his thighs streaked where he had wiped his fingers clean on them. He had taken the time to braid his hair and weave in the eye teeth of the bear that were his right. His face was painted with white clay and his eyes were no longer haunted. There were three deer-handled knives newly hanging from his belt.
Breaca said, “You have met with the bear.”
“I have. And she is content.” There was a life in his eyes she had not seen for years; he, too, was revelling in the gift of a day’s freedom, whatever may come at the end of it. He met her gaze and held it and said the things without speaking that she needed most to hear.
Breaking off, he nodded over his shoulder to the forest, where the undergrowth grew to chest height and seemed impassable. “From here, we need to leave your horses also.” He looked up the length of her, from feet to head. “Are you fit to run?”
It was a challenge of the kind they had set each other on Mona, long before, when the world was young. She lifted one shoulder and said, “I don’t know. Shall we find out?”
She could run, which was good to know, and exhilarating for a while before it became simply hard work.
The challenge was greater than they had ever set on Mona. Then they had not been flogged, had not walked the grey lands between life and death, had not lost — and so refound — the reasons for living. Only once on Mona had they had to run and fight and hide with death all around from undiscovered sources.
Here, it was not all running: Breaca crawled along paths through dense brush that opened only barely and closed behind them; she crossed rivers on stepping stones screened by drooping hazel and river alder so that they were invisible until she trod on them; she sheltered under a whitethorn bush for the duration of a storm and then ran on.
Long into dusk, she scrambled up a narrow path by feel alone and sat for a moment at the top of the limestone crag clutching the bent rowan that had anchored her with one hand and Stone with the other and thought that, if she was not as fit as in her
youth on Mona, she was no worse than she had been before the procurator’s flogging, and perhaps a little fitter.
Soon after that, they saw the fires in the wooded valley down and to their right.
“Wait here.” Ardacos laid a hand on her arm. Breaca sat and watched him slide alone into the dusk.
Cygfa did not wait. She vanished and returned as a ghosted shape in the dusk; only her hair was visible, and the silvered whites of her eyes. “Graine’s there, in the valley.”
“And the others?”
“They’re all there, and more than a hundred Cornovii, all dancing. Hawk is in the centre, wearing a stag skull with antlers. There’s a woman with him. I think it may be Gunovar.”
From somewhere to the right, Ardacos said, “It is.” He pushed through branches that drenched him with old rain and came close enough to let her read him in the dusk. He loved Gunovar, as he had once loved Breaca. The weight of that carved new lines in his face.
To him, Breaca said, “If we attack a hundred Cornovii, we’ll die and they may kill the others. To live, we need to reach the elders alive. If we walk in openly, do you think the scouts will kill us before they recognize who we are?”
“They know already.” She saw the tilt of his face in the part-light as he looked down at his hands. “It is only because of who you are that we have been allowed to come this far. If they did not have orders to guide us to their elders, we would have been sent away long since.” The admission hurt; he was once the best there had ever been. He raised his voice so that the words carried to the sighing trees. “I know of six who watch us, and have done so since we entered the woods. Another two I am less certain of.”
It was not impossible, only unexpected; Breaca had never yet felt unsafe in Ardacos’ care. She said, “If they knew you were there, why did they let you kill three of their scouts?”
The sun-lines deepened about his eyes. “The ones who died were not good enough. The men of the deer, like the followers of the bear, test their young thus against worthy opponents. I am … not unworthy. Those deaths will not be held against us.”
“But they didn’t kill you when they knew you were there. They, too, are not unworthy. Does the same not apply?”
He grinned, a youth again, who has won a challenge. “They didn’t know where I was, except when I was with you, and you are the Boudica who is guarded now by more than Briga and the grandmothers. You make your own rules, or the gods make them for you.”
“How do they know that?”
He shook his head at the stupidity of the question. “Breaca, it shines from you. It has always done, just less so when you were ill. The elders of the Horned One are not so different from the elders of the she-bear. They will see it as we would. If you would stand now, and address those who are hidden, we can test if I am right.”
Graine danced for the horned god under pine made heavy by rain, to skull-drummed rhythms and pipe music and low urgent chants that the god had given to the ancestors and had never been changed.
The skull-beat was a heartbeat, calm sometimes, sometimes hunted, sometimes — and Graine shut herself away at these times — fired by the rut and the power of the god in the stag battles and the mating afterwards that was the right of the victor.
Those times apart, she danced through the sweat and the smoke and the weaving net of noise because she could do nothing else; the songs sang into her blood, the skull drums pulsed into the marrow of her bones, the whistling pipes drew her soul forward so that her flesh had to follow.
She danced in a ring of Cornovii. They were not all men but all of them except her were old enough to have had children and all the women showed the linear marks of childbirth on their bellies. They were all unclothed and no-one tried to protect her from the sight of it and she found that she no longer cared.
With Dubornos in front of her, animated as she had never known him, she danced time and again through the cycle of life that was most sacred to the Cornovii; through the growth of the small thing seeded by the stag in the belly of the hind and the quick slither of its birthing and its first steps in a world where the Horned One held the new life sacred.
With Efnís wild-eyed and leaping behind, she danced over and over the enfolding breath of the mother and the calf’s first knowing of cold, first fear, first taste of milk and of green things growing and of bark in the winter when the snow hid the ground.
With Bellos close to her side, surefooted as any mountain hind, she danced and became the deer and lived and almost-died free of humanity’s care and so began to touch the edges of what that might mean.
She was one of hundreds and they all danced in a ring about the horned man in the centre, who was Hawk and not-Hawk, and the woman who was more than Gunovar who met him and painted her face with his blood.
They danced and the rain dried on the grass and the stars spun and made new shapes and every one of them was carried by the magic of the drums and the horn pipes and they were no longer Eceni and Cornovii and a single Coritani, for ever at war, but one pulse, one heartbeat, one breath, one dance through life towards the inevitable death and there was not one of them who would not willingly have stepped over the precipice that their dancing made to fall into the arms of the waiting god when he called them.
Each time they came close and backed away and started the cycle again with the rut and the setting of seed, they felt envy that the one in the centre was the chosen; that his seed would remain to make new life and he would fly to the god in the moment of his perfection, and be honoured for it ever after.
Graine stubbed her toe. It was a small thing, and only came about because she was by far the youngest and the smallest of the dancers. She was a hind, or perhaps a young buck, and the hunt began and she was trying to out-leap the hounds, which meant leaping higher than Efnís and Dubornos, and she came down awkwardly and twisted her big toe and it hurt so that she hopped and lost the rhythm and thereby lost the dance.
She understood the power of it only by the shock when she stepped back. She did not stop dancing — to do so now would have been to risk being trampled by the rest — but the salt sweat on her lip was no longer the salt of birthing and the pounding heart in her chest was from exertion, not from the hunt, or the rut, or the closeness of death.
She looked about her and saw Efnís completely given to the god and, far more surprisingly, Dubornos, dancing with his eyes half closed and rapture painted on the hills and valleys of his face such as she had never seen in him in the whole of her life. He was a man transformed, aching with the fear of the hunt and the proximity of death and yet in ecstasy of a kind his troubled heart had never given him.
She looked for Bellos and found him nearby and that was the greatest surprise of all. He leaped with the others and shook his head with the pound of the beat, but when she sought him and found him, he turned his blind face to hers and smiled, quite normally, and then blinked both his blind eyes together in such an obvious signal that she stopped dancing for a moment, and havoc and discord shivered down the line.
“Don’t stop.” Bellos was at her side, lifting her forward so that they could continue. “Stay in yourself and watch and learn. It is not a bad thing to be given to the god, but the moon will rise soon and things will change and it is good for one given to Nemain to be able to step away from her when the need arises.”
“But you’re given to Briga.”
“And she is mother to all things. Even the horned god. Even death. And I think, if you look now between the trees, that she has sent one who will change what was to have happened here. You may not have to watch Hawk die.”
Graine stared about, confused. She was dancing again and the fire was bright. Beyond it, the forest was a swirl of dark and other dark and none of it had shape more than a shadow except for the silver haze on the horizon that was the first cutting edge of the sickle moon. Bellos picked her up and whirled her high and set her on his shoulders. His hands held her tightly, buoyantly; he was as exuberant as the others, only w
ith a different reason.
“Be my eyes for me,” he said, laughing, so that she laughed too, “and tell me that I am right and that not only is the Boudica healed, but she has found the heart-song of a blade that will carry all of us past the legions.”
Breaca heard the song of her father’s blade long before she came to it.
Because of Stone, she could not climb down the rock to the valley’s floor.
Because there was no other way down nearby, the Cornovi scouts who had become their guides led them south along the top of the cliff, towards the far southern end where the limestone dipped away to join open heathland and a hound could run safely down.
Because of that, they came to the horses, and the packs that they still carried.
Ardacos had been right: the scouts had known who Breaca was and were in awe of her; even in the dark, they were careful not to hold her gaze for long, or to look her full in the face. He had been wrong about their numbers. There were nine scouts leading them and surrounding them and following behind in case they should lose the path; the eight that he had known of, and one he had not.
The shame of that one left unseen hung about him the full length of the silent, leaping run along the crag’s head, past the fire and the dancing and the rattled drumbeats and mourning pipes that reached up from the valley’s floor and snared them, almost, in the net of their rhythms.
They were not moving slowly; the scouts could run through dense forest at night as easily as in daytime and they were good guides; those who followed them were not much slower. Even so, the stars had moved a long way across the sky before they came to the crag’s end, so that Breaca had begun to wonder if she should have tethered Stone and gone back for him in the morning. Then they found the path and ran down it to the valley’s floor and a horse that she recognized whinnied in the dark and it was not, after all, a waste of time running to the end of the valley.
“That’s Graine’s mare,” she said.