by Jeff Inlo
Sy waited for the messengers to depart and then turned a frustrated expression back to Ryson.
"You wanted soldiers here, you get one. That's it, no more. I'm not going to have this out with you in front of an entire audience. You want a witness, it's going to be Klusac." The captain paused out of respect to ask a question of the man he knew would follow his orders. "Is that alright with you, sergeant?"
Klusac simply nodded and took a position off to Sy's side, making his loyalties obvious.
The captain turned back to Ryson and decided to make his own position quite clear.
"If you don't like this, you're free to leave, but when we talk again, it will be in private and I can guarantee you I won't be any less angry than I am right now. If anything, I'm going to be more annoyed that you made me wait to deal with a problem that I feel is critical to the safety of this town."
Ryson decided the sergeant was sufficient. As he said, he didn't want to have the conversation in complete private. People often said things they regretted when there was no one else around. The presence of Klusac was enough to keep things civil, or so he believed.
"I'll stay." Ryson acknowledged. "What is it you want to say to me?"
Sy almost blurted out every angry curse he could recall, but he held his temper in check. He didn't want to admit it, even to himself, but he was actually very thankful Ryson requested someone to remain. Having the sergeant present forced him to address the issue with a greater degree of control.
He decided to cut right to the most important aspect of what he believed was more than just a valid concern, but a matter that could no longer be ignored. He focused not on what he saw as the delver's near insubordinate behavior, but on the consequences of Ryson's actions.
"You put my soldiers in unnecessary danger tonight."
It was a rather broad accusation, and to the delver, an unfair one. Still, he understood the underlying cause. Ryson knew that Sy was referring to his refusal to allow the soldiers to simply kill the rogues. Rather than argue the complicated ethics of his decision, he offered what he felt was a more diplomatic response.
"We all put ourselves in danger. It's part of what we do… part of life. You don't think your soldiers realize they face danger every time they step outside?"
Sy was not deterred.
"Not unnecessary danger. You can try to paint in any way you want, but that's inexcusable!"
Ryson realized his attempt at diplomacy was not going to be effective. There was too much hostility. He felt it himself; a swelling dissatisfaction that he believed came from Sy's lack of appreciation for the delver's service… and beliefs.
"Why don't you come out and say what you mean?"
"Fine. Your unwillingness to utilize appropriate force with the river rogues hindered us tonight. It wasn't just the rogues that got through some broken drainage gate; a goblin raid broke through our defenses. That's totally unacceptable. Things spiraled out of control tonight, I'll take ownership of that. My soldiers were distracted because I didn't prepare them properly, but that doesn't change the issue I have with you. You cannot dictate to me how I protect this town, especially when it puts people in danger. Rogues came into this town to kill us. We have every right to protect ourselves."
"I'm not trying to dictate what you do. I only told you what I was willing to do. You asked for my help. I wasn't going to help you find the rogues so you could kill them. If you wanted to shoot them down, you should have gone after them yourself."
"And that's exactly what I'm talking about. You're putting your own preferences ahead of the safety of this town."
Ryson felt the charge was not only unfair, but completely ludicrous.
"The safety of the town? I've saved this town more times than I can count. If I'm not mistaken, I saved it again tonight."
"You keep trying to change the subject. This is about your decision regarding the rogues!"
"And that's just a matter of opinion. You see it one way. I see it another. I said it before, I'm not a soldier in your guard. I don't have to follow your orders."
"You may not be an official soldier, but we pay you to work as a scout."
"Pay? This is about money? Unbelievable. Go try to hire another delver to do everything I do for what you pay me. Good luck."
"No, this is not about money!" Sy responded with growing impatience. "Whether you are paid or not is irrelevant. You're a member of this town. Everyone else does what is expected of them. Civilians follow orders, just like the soldiers… everyone but you!"
The delver quickly became as equally annoyed as the captain. He did not appreciate Sy's tone or his claims.
"And that's what this is really about, isn't it?" Ryson shot back. "You have everyone under your control, but not me. You tell people what to do and they all just jump right to it, but not me. That's what's really bothering you. Isn't it?"
Clenching his teeth in mounting resentment, Sy found the accusation totally unjustified. He was not some dictator that issued edicts at a whim. He was willing to give his life to protect the people of Burbon. If it was simply control he was after, he could have clapped the delver in irons and let him sit in the stockade for several days. Rather than make that threat, he pointed out a very clear truth as to the consequences of several mistakes made on that evening.
"What's bothering me is that people died tonight!"
Shocked, Ryson's own emotions bubbled over.
"They didn't die because I wouldn't let you kill the rogues!"
"How do I know that? My soldiers were watching you streak across town with your sword like a blasted comet!"
"You're the one that told me to use the sword as a signal."
"Because you wouldn't let me use archers to take the monsters out as quickly as possible!"
"You're not making any sense! You asked me to find them and I did. I still would have had to signal for your troops… even if I let them shoot the rogues. I would have been a distraction either way!"
"But it would have been quicker! You added to the distraction by forcing us to use nets, and you put more soldiers at risk than necessary. I heard about the corporal!"
"Don't even think about hanging that on me! What happened to him was his own blasted fault!"
"Like I said before, I'll take responsibility for the failings of my soldiers, but that's still not the issue!" The captain paused, caught his passions.
Despite Klusac's presence, the conversation had eclipsed combative. It was becoming an angry shouting match. Sy didn't want that. He wasn't trying to rebuke a soldier, he was hoping to get a trusted friend to realize just how dangerous certain decisions had become. They lived in difficult times that required hard decisions and harder actions. None of them had the luxury of making every choice that would fit their particular preferences, and the captain tried to refocus on the true matter of contention.
After taking a heavy breath, he pointed to the war blades that Ryson wore at his hips. "I gave you those blades when you lost your sword. You took them because you knew that sometimes weapons are necessary. I don't give orders because I like to tell people what to do. I do it because they trust me to keep this town safe. I do it because it's necessary. We have to defend ourselves."
Ryson looked down at the blades at his sides as he also tried to find a calmer tone. He understood what Sy was stating, but he had his own perspective on the matter.
"You're right. I still wear these blades… just in case. They're not enchanted. There's very little I can do with them… other than kill."
Ryson took his own heavy breath and then explained how he saw the truth. "Not so long ago, they were taken away from me by a bunch of separatist dwarves that wanted to kill me. I could have left them behind after that, never picked them up again. I had the excuse, but you know what? I retrieved them. I retrieved them because I understand exactly what you're saying."
"Do you? Because I'd like to see you use those blades once in a while."
"That's exactly my point; I did use the
m once, once when there was no other choice. I killed shags by the hundreds… actually, probably more like the thousands. Sometimes it keeps me up at night when I think of how many lives I ended in the desert sand."
"You killed shags during a battle. They're just monsters and they were there to kill you."
"They were monsters to me. To them, maybe I'm the monster. But yes, they were there to kill me, and also to kill innocent algors. As hollow as it sometimes sounds, I justify what I did by saying that to myself over and over again… that if I didn't kill them they would have killed me… they would have killed me and I don't know how many innocent algors. I killed because I really didn't have a choice. That's my line in the sand… when there's no other choice."
"I have to make choices, too," Sy noted. "Some of us can't draw a line in the sand because other people are depending on us to make the hard choices. Some of us can't afford to take the easy way out."
The delver stared into the captain's face with pure disbelief. It felt as if he had been stabbed, and his emotions began to erupt once more. The calm tone left his voice as the accusation sliced into Ryson's core.
"The easy way out?! You're kidding right?"
"No, I'm not. I'm telling you how it is."
"You think it's easy? Easy would have been to do exactly what you wanted me to do! I could have simply allowed you to make the decision for me. Easy would have been for me to find the blasted rogues, point to them, let your guards shoot them down, and then just forget it ever happened."
Ryson almost shook with fury. He could barely stand still. He looked from the captain to the sergeant and then back again. He saw defiance in both their expressions, a total unwillingness to accept the delver's viewpoint.
"Easy?" Ryson questioned. "You think it's easy to try and do what's right? You think it's easy to live with making that kind of decision day after day? Let me tell you about a hard choice. You're going to let three rogues loose down river because I told you to. I have to live with that! They still have to eat. They have to kill something. You think that's easy to wipe out of my mind?"
"Hey, if you're upset over this, it's your own fault!"
"My fault?! You really are narrow-minded. I didn't bring the blasted rogues to this world. All I'm trying to do is set a standard for myself. None of it makes any sense to me."
Just like Ryson, Sy's emotions bubbled to the surface once more and his frustrated tone returned.
"Sense? You're trying to find sense in all of this? Good luck! You keep looking at these monsters as some kind of innocent bystanders, like maybe a herd of deer in the forest. I see them for what they are… a dangerous threat, total insanity that decided to enter our lives. There's no sense to it. This is about doing our duty, doing what's best for the town, not about trying to make sense of it all."
"That's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard you say! Your duty better make sense. If it doesn't, you should step down right now. And don't start giving me that 'best for the town' nonsense. Maybe it would be best for the town if I just went out and killed every small time thief out there. Put the fear of Godson in them. Hey, if I should kill a river rogue, why not a human thief?"
And with that, all attempts at civility dissolved.
"And that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say," Sy countered. "There's no comparison!"
"There's not? Maybe not to you, but there is to me. If I start killing indiscriminately, then why stop at river rogues? I might as well just start killing anything that starts annoying me."
"That's also idiotic!" Sy replied. "How can you possibly say that? You think that fighting off rogues-killing them when it's necessary, when they invade our town-is the same as indiscriminate killing?"
"I thought we were talking about choices, the choices we have to make in life. I have to make a choice about where I draw the line. That's what I'm talking about. And if you'd think clearly for a minute, you'd understand. How many times have you told me people have to live with the choices they make? We can't save everyone, especially from themselves… I've heard that from you as well. But at the same time you expect them all to follow orders. That's rather inconsistent."
"I don't see it that way. People have to be held accountable for their actions."
"Accountable? How can they be held accountable if they're just following orders, doing what you tell them to do?"
Sy suddenly felt the need to defend himself. The issue had changed from Ryson's unwillingness to compromise to whether or not Sy was acting as some kind of tyrant.
"We need order here!"
"So which is it? Order or freedom to choose?"
"You can have both!" the captain declared, fiercely defending both his honor and his methods. "I don't interfere with people's lives. Every order I give is based on keeping this town safe. That's what I'm charged with, that's what the people of this town want me to do! You want to question my orders? Fine. I'm not happy about it, but I can take questions, I can even take criticism. What I cannot take, what I will not accept, is you putting your personal preferences over the safety of my soldiers and this town. That stops now!"
Ryson felt as if he was just given an order he could not, would not, follow.
"Or what?" the delver demanded, unwilling to simply accept Sy's declaration as the final word.
Sy understood Ryson's question all too well. The guard captain was placed in a situation where he had to exercise his authority. It was not a position he savored, but it was a duty he would not shirk. With one deliberate decision, he put an end to the argument.
"I'm not giving you an ultimatum, if that's what you think, because it's not up to you. I've had my say and you've had yours. Hopefully, you'll understand my next decision. What you said is true, you have saved this town many times over, and for that, I am eternally grateful. Still, I don't believe I can rely on you as I have in the past. In my judgment, your actions contributed to the breakdown of our defenses tonight. Whether you want to believe it or not is irrelevant. In the future, I will not be calling for your assistance."
The finality of Sy's tone caught the delver completely off guard.
"Just like that?" Ryson asked in disbelief.
"No, unfortunately, it's not that easy. I have a great deal of work to do. I have to retrain my guards, have to break my own reliance on you, but I don't have a choice. Your official service to Burbon is at an end."
A thousand questions burned through the delver's mind. He wondered exactly what that meant and how Sy would treat him from that moment on. He had grown accustomed to working with the town guard, in being part of Burbon's defense. Did Sy take all of that away because of one disagreement? It certainly seemed that way. He wondered what he would do, how he would feel about being excluded, about not being allowed to help, something that was part of his very nature.
He was a delver, a scout, and he used his abilities to track threats, defend against invaders, and unravel mysteries. One such mystery faced them that very evening, and he could not remove his focus from it once it reentered his thoughts.
"And what are you going to do about the elves?" the delver demanded.
"That's not your concern," Sy stated, holding to the very core of his decision, disregarding the assistance he knew the delver could offer. It didn't matter. If he was going to move forward without Ryson's aid, he would have to start that very evening.
"Not my concern?" the delver responded with growing astonishment. "I'm afraid it is! I worked with the elves long before you did."
"Your relationship with the elves is not relevant to my duty."
Ryson considered what Sy had said, but he also realized he was still a delver. Just because Sy made some irrational decision, that wasn't going to alter his identity or diminish the natural curiosity that burned within him.
"I need to find out what happened to them," the delver declared. "By tomorrow morning, I'll be out in Dark Spruce searching for answers. Are you going to want to know what I find?"
Sy felt as if he was be
ing maneuvered. He decided against playing along. He meant what he said about breaking his reliance.
"What you do from this point on is your business," Sy responded coldly, "as long as it doesn't interfere with the safety of this town. As for the elves, I'm going to send a messenger to Connel. I will inform Enin of what happened here tonight, and I'm going to request the assistance of Holli Brances. That's how I'm going to handle this. As far as I'm concerned, this matter is concluded."
The statement was as abrupt as it was final, and Ryson decided that suited him as well. He turned about and left the command post.
As Sy watched the delver leave, he wondered if he just made one of the biggest mistakes of his life. He looked to Sergeant Klusac and made a very honest admission.
"Well, I didn't handle that very well."
"No, you didn't," the sergeant conceded, but then added to that concession. "Then again, neither did he. He's got no right to question your judgment, and anyway you slice it, that's what he was doing here tonight."
Sy reflected on that thought, and for one moment, tried to examine the events that transpired from a different viewpoint.
"He doesn't want to kill. I knew that when I asked for his help. Why was I surprised?"
"That, I can't answer, but were you really surprised?"
"No, but I was angry. I can't lie about that."
"Angry doesn't mean you're wrong," Klusac offered. "It doesn't mean either of you are wrong. You're just in different positions. He sees things his way, you see things yours. As long as you're looking out for the best interests of this town…"
"I believe I am," Sy interrupted. "I honestly do. What do you think?"
"I wouldn't serve with you if I didn't."
"Thanks, but what did we lose tonight?"