by Lex Martin
“I’ll head out now, but it’ll probably take me forty-five minutes on the T.” The Boston subway system is pretty decent, but BC is a hike.
“No, I’ll call for a cab. That way you don’t have to drag your luggage all over the city. There’s cash in my top dresser drawer. Take fifty and get lunch afterward.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, you’re doing me a huge favor. The least I can do is pay for the cab. I’ll call for one now and text you with the info in a few minutes. Dani, I totally owe you.”
I shake my head. “No, Clem, you don’t.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
- Jax -
“Why the hell did you invite them?” I grip the steering wheel as Nick frowns at me from the passenger seat.
“I was under the impression that you had already invited the girls to go skiing with us,” he says with more sarcasm than necessary.
I grab my phone and check the time. Dani is late. Blowing out a breath, I grumble, “Newsflash, genius. I didn’t mean it.” I had ignored their calls and thought I was out of the woods.
I sit with the engine idling for ten minutes debating whether we should grab lunch now while we wait.
“Hey, if you don’t want to wedge yourself between two gorgeous women and their unnaturally large breasts, that’s fine by me. They’re not too discriminating if I recall correctly, so…”
He lets his comment hang in the air as he waits for me to lay claim to them. Which I don’t.
Shifting my car into first, I pull into the street as my phone rings. J-squared. Shoot me the fuck now. Maybe I should call this off before I find myself having to avoid them on the slopes.
I’m putting the phone to my ear and about to shift into second when Nick yells and throws his fist into my chest.
My heart is caught somewhere in my throat when Dani steps off the curb. Right in front of my car.
* * *
My whole life flashes before my eyes as I slam on the breaks, but my BMW slides on the damp road and barrels toward her. Dani watches as though frozen, her hair gusting in the wind. Her eyes close at the last minute when she makes contact with my car, her hand slamming onto my hood with a loud thud before she disappears on the other side.
“Dude, you hit her,” Nick says, stating the obvious.
I leap out of my seat and race around the car to find Dani on the ground, her luggage a few feet behind her. Her hair splays out beneath her like she’s floating in water. I fall on my knees next to her and brush a few strands out of her face.
Although I’m grateful I don’t see any blood, that doesn’t make me feel any better. She could still have internal injuries.
“Dani, can you hear me? Dani?”
She moans, and at the sound of her voice, my heart begins beating again.
“Jesus, man.” Nick stands next to me, offering nothing but ongoing one-liners.
Somehow I manage to find my phone.
“911, what’s your emergency?”
Speaking is difficult, but I manage to croak, “I hit a girl with my car. Hurry up, she needs an ambulance.”
I toss the phone to Nick to finish the conversation, and I turn to Dani. My thumb wipes away a tear that’s sliding down her cheek. Even though she’s unconscious, I’m struck by her beauty. Her smooth skin. Her perfect lips. The way her eyelashes barely touch her cheek. I’m overwhelmed the way a kid is the first time he realizes that space is somehow infinite and expanding.
Yeah, scared shitless.
A brief image of Dani dancing behind a cage flickers behind my eyes for some reason, and I fight the urge to cradle her in my arms.
“Why did you hit me? I wasn’t that late.” Her voice is soft, barely a whisper.
My breath catches in my chest and then I find myself laughing. “Fuck. Dani, I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.”
“The cab dropped me off on the wrong street…”
Her eyes flutter open, and one glance at her has me aching in ways I didn’t think possible anymore. Something taps my wrist a minute before I realize it’s her hand.
“You’re going to need this,” she says, wincing.
I look down as she unwraps her fingers to reveal my driver’s license. My heart pounds out a frenzied beat as I realize I’d be totally screwed right now without it.
A siren finally cuts through the sound of blood roaring in my ears. Nick bumps me hard with his knee. “Coach is going to have your ass, man. He’ll probably kick you off the team for this.”
I grunt at him, irritated that he’s probably right, but that’s not what’s important right now. Heavy doors slam to my right as a cop runs up to us.
“Sir, step away from the woman.”
I swallow. God, I’m in deep shit.
Dani tugs on my hand. “No, don’t leave me, Jax.” Tears well up in her eyes and spill down her pale cheeks.
The policeman kneels down to take a closer look at her.
She closes her eyes briefly before she says, “Jax is my friend. I want him here.” She struggles to say every word.
With a surprised look on his face, the cop stares at me long and hard before he turns back to her. At least he doesn’t ask me to move. He feels for her pulse, asks a few questions about her injuries, and then, satisfied she looks stable, takes out a notepad. “Ma’am, can you answer a few questions about what happened?”
She shouldn’t have to deal with this. “I hit her. It was my fault. I was driving and—”
“It wasn’t his fault.” Dani pulls on my hand again until I look at her. Her face is wet, and her eyelids are heavy. Her eyes shift back to the cop. “I was, uh, on the phone, and I didn’t look for traffic when I crossed the street. I was coming to see him. Jax is my friend.”
No, I was the one on the phone. The truth is hammering in my chest until I feel like I’m suffocating, and I look to Dani to tell her she doesn’t have to do this, but when my eyes meet hers, she shakes her head slightly.
The ambulance finally arrives, and an EMT races up to us and checks her vitals.
I stand there, answering the cop’s questions while the paramedic rips up the leg of her jeans to reveal a huge bruise along her knee and thigh. Jesus Christ. I could have killed this girl.
“Shouldn’t I know your name before you start ripping off my clothes?” she asks, making the paramedic grin. He’s a young guy, maybe in his mid-twenties.
I feel myself scowling at him.
The policeman takes another emergency call and prepares to leave. Satisfied that I didn’t intentionally try to run her over, he says I didn’t break any traffic signs and doesn’t even give me a citation.
Fuck, I owe this girl.
I watch the cruiser pull away. Nick lets out a sigh.
I’m starting to think everything will be okay, that Dani is alive and things could have been so much worse because I’m clearly a total dumbass, but that feeling of relief is short-lived as Dani starts crying when the paramedics load her in the ambulance.
“Can I go with her?” My voice is thick with emotion.
The guy shakes his head. “Family only, sir. I’m sorry.”
I don’t know where the words come from, but they’re out my mouth before I can stop. “She’s my girlfriend. I can’t let her go alone.”
Finally, he shrugs. “If it’s okay with her, it’s okay with me.” He mumbles something to her and then turns to me. “Come on.”
I toss my keys to Nick. “Here, grab her stuff and meet us at the hospital.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
- Dani -
Someone is stroking my head gently.
I’m cold. Freezing. And my mouth is dry. I want to reach down to pull up a blanket except when I do more than breathe, every muscle in my body cries out.
My chest radiates with fear. Why does everything hurt so much?
Opening my eyes, I stare at the face that’s been haunting me for the past two and a half months.
“Am I dreaming?” I swallow and wince at the pain i
n my throat.
Jax smiles weakly. “I wish you were, Dani.”
The rhythmic beat of machines pulsing draws my attention. I’m in the hospital. The memory of what happened comes flooding back to me.
Jax pulls away and runs his hands through his shaggy dark blond hair, leaving it sticking up at odd angles. I close my eyes, eager to shut out his magnetic presence.
He sighs, letting the air whoosh from his lips. “I am so sorry. For all of this. Shit, I almost had a heart attack when I realized what happened. And seeing you on the pavement like that. Fuck.”
Despite my exhaustion, I struggle to look at him. The usual don’t-give-a-damn glint in his eyes is gone, replaced with worry.
I lick my dry lips, but I don’t have enough moisture in my mouth to accomplish anything.
“Here.” Jax gets up and pours me a cup of water out of a pink plastic pitcher. He hands it to me, and I try to smile in appreciation. I can’t drink it yet because my whole body aches, and it takes me moment to catch my breath. Finally, I take a sip. I’ve never tasted anything so good before.
“Can I ask you something?” he asks. His blue eyes crinkle in the corners. His lips are tight.
I nod slowly and then let my head rest on the pillow, too tired to do more than convalesce. A silence yawns between us.
Finally, he asks, “Why did you tell the cops this was your fault? I know you saw me on the phone.”
Because I have a huge-ass crush on you? Because I want to have your babies? Because I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we met?
I stare at him, realizing that while those sentiments are true, they’re probably not why I did it.
“I heard you and your friend talking.”
“My roommate Nick?”
“I guess.” I take another sip of water. “I heard what he said about you getting in trouble with your coach, and I didn’t want to be the reason you got kicked off the team.”
Jax frowns and looks at me like I’ve sprouted an extra head. “Seriously?”
“Yeah.” I laugh a little, but it hurts, and I groan. “Don’t make me laugh.” I take a couple of deep breaths until the pain subsides. He’s sitting so close I can smell his gorgeous cologne, which is crisp and clean. “Your sister always talks about how you’re supposed to go pro and how you have scouts at all your games. She’s really proud of you.”
He scoffs, and it’s funny to see doubt on his beautiful face.
“Anyway, I didn’t want to screw that up for you.”
The silence between us is thick. Jax tilts his head up and stares at the ceiling for at least a minute. “Well, shit.”
I’m taken aback by his intensity. “Don’t think so hard about this. Let’s just chalk it off to the fact that I hit my head, okay?”
His mouth pulls up into a crooked grin. “I might fucking love you right now.”
My eyes widen, and I’m sure I’d be blushing right if my circulation was working properly. “If love nearly gets me killed by your Beemer, I’d hate to see what hate gets me.”
He barks out a laugh that makes me jerk back, and I smile once the pain of that sudden movement subsides.
I start to look around the room, and when I see the clock, my heart sinks. “Oh my God. I can’t believe it’s so late. Where’s my phone?”
“The nurse put all of your stuff in a bag. Hold on.” Reaching over me, he grabs a plastic sack that says “patient” and hands it to me.
I slowly root around in the bag until I find my phone. I have messages and texts from my mom, Travis and Brady.
Jax tells me he’s going to track down some dinner for us. I don’t bother listening to the messages. I just dial home. My mom picks up on the second ring.
“Danielle, shouldn’t you be on a plane right now?”
Tears prick my eyes. “Mom, don’t freak, but something happened. I’m okay, but…” My voice trails off as I fight to not cry.
“Tell me everything. I won’t be mad. You’re on the phone and alive. That’s all that matters.” Her voice is cool and calm. I love this about my mother. In a crisis, she’s amazing.
“I kind of got hit by a car, but I’m okay,” I say over her gasp.
Twenty minutes later, when Jax walks in, I’m a mess.
“Shit, Dani. What’s wrong? Are you in pain?”
I’m crying into my hands, every sob transporting pain throughout my body. I keep my face covered. “I promised my mom I’d be home for Thanksgiving, but I missed my flight, and everything is sold out.” The last few words sound more like hiccups. “She was really sick last year. She had cancer. And I haven’t seen her since this summer. And…”
The bed sags as Jax sits on the edge and leans over to hug me, making me cry harder. “I’m sorry, babe. This is my fault.”
I cry into him until the tears run out. I cry until my heart can’t take it any longer. Tilting my head back so I can wipe off my face, I see how wet his shirt is.
“You’re going to drown if I don’t stop crying.” A shudder runs through me.
“Come here. Don’t apologize.” He wraps his arms around me again, and he smells so good, so fresh and sexy. He’s warm and comforting, and for a minute, I forget about my flight home.
I snuggle into him, relishing his muscular chest and how nice it is to be pressed up against him again.
And then it hits me. I’m snuggling with Jax Avery.
My heart starts beating furiously, and an alarm goes off next to me. Jax pulls back, and we look at each other. A second later, an older nurse scurries in and presses a button, making that horrible sound stop.
“Honey, you all right?” She shoos Jax off the bed before she pulls back the neck of my gown to check the leads that are taped all over my chest, and then she gives me a once over, surveying me for signs of distress. “I’m Charlotte, and I’ll be your nurse tonight.” She checks the heart monitor and turns to me. “You need to stay calm. I don’t know what has you all riled up,” she says, looking to Jax, “but you can’t get so excited.”
“Sorry. I was upset about not being able to go home for the holidays.” That sounds so much better than “I was so excited Jax had his hands on me.”
She pats me on the hand and gives me a sympathetic smile. “Of course. Well, at least you have your cute boyfriend to keep you company.” I start to tell her we’re not together, but she cuts me off to talk to him. “You’re a lucky guy. Danielle is gorgeous. And what a smile! You two make an adorable couple!”
My mouth falls open, and I stutter, trying to find words to clarify my relationship to Jax, but the smirk on his face stops me, as do his next words.
“She is gorgeous.”
The alarm goes off again, my heart rate racing. The nurse laughs, and my face heats up. “I should have known you were the reason.” She clucks at Jax as she walks around my bed and turns off the alarm. “I’ll be back in half an hour to give you your pain meds. Until then, no more alarms.” She points at Jax, who holds up his hands like he’s innocent. His charm works, and my nurse grins and walks out.
Jax’s attention shifts back to me, and I look down. God, that was embarrassing.
Picking up my phone, I scroll through my texts, ignoring Jax’s stare. It takes me a few minutes to focus on anything besides how much I miss his warmth in this cold room. But when I read Brady’s text from this afternoon, the reality of where he and I are headed comes crashing back to me.
“I’ve met someone.”
I groan. Those three words fill me with such doubt.
The rest of his text is worse. “I wanted to let you know. To see if you felt any differently about us.”
Am I doing the wrong thing in letting Brady go? I’m sitting here enjoying Jax’s attention, but just because he’s flirty and sweet doesn’t mean he likes me. Brady actually likes me, and he actually wants me to be his girlfriend.
Jax taps me on the arm. “Your heart rate is spiking again. I don’t want Charlotte coming back and busting my balls.” When I dare a glanc
e at him, his beautiful blue eyes look concerned. He nods toward my phone. “Message from your boyfriend?” He sits forward in his chair and rests his elbows on his knees.
“Oh, Brady? No. He’s not my boyfriend. Not really.” I rub my face. “Or not anymore. I don’t know.”
“Is it because of you or him? The reason why you’re not together.”
I bury my attention in my lap. “Uh, because of me.”
He doesn’t say anything for a while. “So you broke up with him?”
Shaking my head slowly, I say, “No, I didn’t break up with him. You have to be together to break up.”
Jax seems to think about this for a minute. “But he wanted more?”
“Yes. But I didn’t feel right about it.”
“What do you mean?”
My lips purse as I think of how to explain. “Brady knew I didn’t feel that way about him—I was honest from the beginning—but he still wanted to give it a shot even though I’ve been trying to get over someone else.” I don’t look up. I can’t. I’m afraid Jax will see straight through me. But it feels good to get this off my chest in some small way. “Anyway, I think he gave up because he texted that he met someone, and I was about to write him back when you decided to add some excitement to my afternoon and run me over.”
Jax doesn’t laugh. “What are you gonna tell him?”
I rub the side of my head where a swollen lump throbs. “To go out with her. That I want him to be happy.”
“But you don’t sound excited about it.”
My shoulders slump. “In my heart it feels like the right thing to do—to let him go—but I’m upset with myself for not moving on, for not being able to try things out with Brady, because he’s been a great friend despite my hang-ups, and I know he cares about me.” I sigh, my fingers fidgeting with the strip of medical tape that binds the IV to my wrist. “But if he found someone, I don’t want to be the reason he can’t be with her.”
“Even if it makes you unhappy?”
When I look up at him, I’m struck by how we can have this conversation even though there’s so much between us that Jax doesn’t even know exists. But maybe we can be friends. Maybe this is what I should have wanted with him all along. And I guess friendship starts with honesty.