by P. G. Van
“I was outraged when I saw the terror in my aunt’s eyes and slammed the bat on the back of his head,” I said, clenching my teeth and wiping off the moisture on my cheeks, “He fell off the bed, and I used the sheet to press on her wounds to stop the bleeding. I just cannot forget the sight and even the smell in that room to this date.”
Reyan ran his palm on my back in silence as I continued. “I was untying my aunt when the guy woke up and attacked me. He brought the knife to stab me but I had a few inches of body height over him to tackle him. The knife ran through my chest when I fell on him.”
Reyan ran his fingers on the scar and cupped his palm over it.
“I was so pissed that he hurt my aunt that I picked up the baseball bat again and smashed his balls and called 911.”
“I am glad you did that,” he said through clenched teeth.
“Yes, I am too, and our life changed from that day. Up until that point, I couldn’t wait to go to college and start my life with Justin away from all this but after that night, I could not think about leaving my aunt and Meg. I hated my aunt when I found out what she did for a living and loathed the idea of living under the same roof as her but that night…” I paused to catch a breath and added, “When I took her to the hospital, my t-shirt was soaked with my own blood, but what hurt me more were the scars my aunt had from her previous encounters with such clients. I told myself that day I wasn’t going anywhere even if it meant I would be a high school dropout.”
“Where was Meg that night when all this happened?”
“This is what is different between you and all the other morons I dated in the past. You actually listen and care. You care about the people I love,” I said kissing him on his cheek.
“Meg is my baby sister and my best bud, I do care for her,” he said softly.
“She was sleeping, and the cops had one of the female cops stay back at home for her, and the next day we told her mommy fell sick and had to be taken to the hospital.”
“I am glad she didn’t have to...” Reyan said in a wobbly voice.
“I don’t want her to ever find out Reyan. I am not kidding,” I warned him.
“She won’t hear it from me, but you need to tell her at some point in time,” he said sternly.
“I know.”
“I thought your aunt worked at the bakery with your mom. When did she become an escort?”
“She was compelled to…her husband married her to bring her here to turn her into an escort. He was outraged when he found out she got pregnant right after they got married, and he left her.”
Reyan dug his fingertips into me and the pain gave me so much comfort. Just having someone who understands what I had to go through was all I wanted.
“The pimp that paid for him to bring her here from India was threatening her, and she needed the money for Meg’s medical bills so she did what she had to do.”
“I just can’t believe these bastards,” he growled.
“Oh, another asshole was Justin. When I told him I wasn’t going to college with him, he threatened to break up with me. When I didn’t budge, he went around telling everyone in school about my aunt and what she did for a living and spread rumors that I wasn’t going to college because escort services made more money.”
“I am glad he was an asshole.”
“What the heck?” I slapped his chest with the back of my hand.
“You probably would have gotten married to him and had a kid. Who would have saved me from my accident if you weren’t here?” Reyan said bringing his lips to my forehead.
“Not cool.”
“So, that’s why I dropped my big plans to go to college,” I concluded.
“What happened to your aunt’s client?”
“Robert was sentenced for eight years, and I got so many indirect threats in the mail, my aunt struck a deal with the Changs and we moved in here.”
“I promise not to be another Justin,” Reyan said softly.
“Do you still want to hang out with me with the newfound information?”
“Like I said, nothing will change the way I feel about you,” he said deterministically.
“What do you feel about me?” I asked looking into his eyes.
“I don’t know what I feel, but I know your are very important to me. Very important,” Reyan said, holding me to him as I drowned into a blissful sleep wrapped in the comfort of his body heat.
Chapter 12
“Let him go,” I demanded, looking into the bloodshot eyes of the man who attacked me when I was seventeen.
He laughed, a devious smile that would freeze anyone in his or her path.
“I am the one to avenge for your pain, let him go,” I pleaded when my demand only made him more amused.
He laughed again, but did not say anything.
“Reyan, get out of here,” I begged.
“Reyan…” I uttered, and my eyes flew open. I wiped the beads of cold sweat off my forehead and turned to look at the man sleeping next to me.
The early morning light streamed through the blinds giving me the right amount of brightness to observe Reyan. He was sleeping peacefully on his back, his breathing soft and steady. My heart rate was rapid; my breathing was heavy unlike his.
A shiver ran through my spine at the memory of the face I had forgotten for years. He was going to be out on parole in a few months for good behavior, and I knew he would come after me for revenge.
I looked at Reyan as he slept peacefully but deep down, I knew he would eventually get sick of my past and how my past has molded me. He was very supportive when I told him about my aunt and what happed that scary night, but I was sure I would end up with another annoying, time wasting breakup. Things that didn’t bother him at that point would soon start bothering him, and I couldn’t take the risk of getting in any deeper with him.
I gave him what he wanted, and I got what I wanted and it was time for us to go our separate ways.
Best thing to do.
I ran the tip of my index finger on his bare chest to follow the thin trail of hair on his chest. I smiled when he reacted to my touch and opened his eyes. He pulled me to him, eyes filled with joy and something deep in my stomach twisted when I realized I might not see him again.
“Good morning beautiful!!” he reached up to brush his lips against mine. I ran my fingers through his hair, pulling his closer wanting to take advantage of every last second with him.
“Coffee?” he asked getting out of bed and walking towards the bathroom.
“No, but we need to talk,” I managed to stay calm.
“Gimme two minutes.” He disappeared into the bathroom, and I sat on the bed with a deep ache in my chest. He wasn’t like any other guy I had ever met; he and I had some kind of connection that I wasn’t willing to foster.
“What did you wanna talk about?” he said interrupting my thoughts. I watched him button up his dress shirt as I rehearsed what I wanted to tell him.
“I have my answer for you Reyan.”
He looked at me with a puzzled expression on his face.
“You told me on Sunday morning that I have until tonight to think about us.”
“And…” he prompted smiling.
“There will be no ‘us’ Reyan. I have too much going on in my life.” I managed to utter looking into his eyes.
He looked at me in disbelief and when he finally spoke his voice was coarse, “What changed from last night?”
“Nothing, I still want you as much as you want me, but I know there is no future for us,” I said softly and added, “You and I are very different, and I cannot keep up with maintaining a relationship, even if it’s a casual one.”
He dug his fingers into his trouser pockets and asked, “What is the real problem?”
“Nothing, we just have different lives.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyes bore into mine with anger simmering in them.
I took a deep breath to calm my trembling body and said, “I am the kin
d to work at a bar to earn a living and you are the kind to relax after a long day of work. I can’t keep skipping work to meet and mate with you,” I said flatly.
“You are being ridiculous!!” I knew he was about to lose his temper.
“Reyan, this is what you suggested, and I am making a choice,” I said firmly.
He took two steps towards and said softly, “You are okay to never see me?”
“Yes…it’s best for both of us.”
“What the fuck Vinnie, you are saying this after what we had last night?” he was upset and it hurt me deep inside.
“Yes,” I said and felt the lash of pain deep inside my chest.
“Fuck you!!” He was clearly angry, and I knew I had to hold up to it. I could not take the risk of getting hurt when I was neck deep with him.
“You can fuck yourself, Reyan. It was your fucking idea to do this because you didn’t want to be friggin friends with me.” I lashed out angry at myself.
He looked at me for a few seconds, and I felt the heat on my skin from his stare but I held my chin high and held his gaze.
“Have a fucking good life saving assholes that roll off the highway.” He grabbed his wallet and stuff from the end table and stormed out. I sat in bed, unable to move as I replayed the conversation.
A couple of minutes later, I heard the familiar growl of the powerful engine of his car, and I heard it race down the street. I knew exactly how Reyan felt from the way he drove off.
I sat frozen in my spot as moisture gathered in my eyes. My eyelids fluttered at the unfamiliar experience of moisture gathering in my eyes. I grabbed the sheets closer to me, and I caught a whiff of Reyan’s cologne on the sheets.
As if something deep inside blasted through a wall, tears rolled down my cheek at the thought of not seeing his handsome face again. Why did I always end up in this situation no matter when I broke up with a guy? It was worse with Reyan, he wasn’t even my boyfriend and I was already moping over a non-existent breakup.
“Vinnie, open up,” Meg urged from the other side of the bathroom. I did not respond but she would not stop banging on the door.
“Open up or I am getting the spare key to your room from mom,” she said adamantly.
I wiped off the moisture from my eyes and went to open the door. I turned away immediately so she wouldn’t see my face.
“Vinnie, why is Reyan so upset?” she asked sounding worried.
“I don’t know, ask him. I need to sleep,” I said and pulled the sheet over my head hoping she would leave.
She wouldn’t be my cousin if she did what I asked her to do. “I am not leaving until you tell me what happened.”
A lump formed in my throat, and I tried really hard to swallow while fighting my body’s need to cry and let out the pain. I felt the sheets come off my body.
“Meg, get out. Leave me alone,” I fumed at her.
She looked at me like she saw a ghost and when she spoke finally, her voice was barely audible, “Are you crying? I have never seen you cry.”
“I am sorry, I didn’t realize there were rules about that.” I mocked and Meg dove into me and put her arms around me.
“It is shit scary to see you cry, please don’t cry,” she sobbed.
I laughed amidst my sorrow and said, “Not really crying Meg, just the body’s way of dealing with an unsuitable situation.”
“What happened, Vinnie? Reyan looked so sad,” she asked, her voice muffled.
I knew instantly why my body reacted to him leaving. I couldn’t bear the idea of him being sad. I really shouldn’t care, but he comforted me and listened to me all night and I hurt him first thing in the morning. I didn’t even wait for him to get some coffee.
“I told him I didn’t want to see him again,” I said softly.
“Are you fucking insane? Why would you do that?” Meg fumed.
“Watch your language, Meg,” I growled.
“I don’t care Vinnie, you can tell mom but what the fuck?” she asked not letting go.
“It’s best for both of us, Meg.”
“I don’t understand, Vinnie. Not everyone is an asshole like Justin,” she blurted.
“How the heck do you know about Justin?” I asked shocked, as I had not shared the ordeal with Justin with anyone.
“It doesn’t matter, Reyan is a good guy,” she deflected.
“Meg, I am not asking again, how do you know about Justin?”
“I might have come across something on your computer, or I might have read one of your manuscripts and pieced things together,” she confessed.
“I don’t need to be lectured by a fourteen-year-old on my relationships,” I retorted.
“Yes, you do. Who else would care to lecture you about this?” Meg said without backing down.
I wrapped my arms around her and said, “You are a good girl, Meg.”
“I love you too Vinnie, and I will be okay with you if you broke up with him because he is no good in bed,” she giggled.
“Meg, stop the crap and get out.”
Meg continued to giggle and said looking at me, “So he is good, and I am guessing a lot better than the other idiots you’ve dated.”
“You are way out of line here,” I warned.
“Okay fine, don’t tell me, but why did you break up with him?” she asked the million dollar question.
“It’s not a break up because we were never together to begin with,” I shrugged.
“How could you when he brought you home in that awesomely hot car?” she pouted.
“I wish I were shallow, Meg. Now get out, because I am working an event tonight, and I need to sleep.”
“Yup, I am sure you barely slept last night,” she teased getting out of bed.
I glowered at her and that seemed to amuse her.
“When were you planning on telling mom about Reyan?” she asked not giving up.
“Nothing to tell her now,” I said slipping back under the sheets burying my face in the pillow.
*****
“I had to wait four weeks to see you,” Jason grumbled taking the opportunity to hug me. He continued his futile efforts to take me out every time I worked an event at the club. He looked very charming in a crisp gray dress shirt and dark wash jeans, and looked his part as the owner and host of the club. His father entrusted him to run the club in the South Bay while he took care of the bar and restaurant in the City.
I had strictly said no to Jason based on the fact that he was in a way my employer, but now I had a more solid and disturbing reason to not be interested in Jason.
Reyan.
I took a deep breath and said softly, “Good to see you too, Jason.”
“Where’s the energy gal?” he teased.
“I’ll get there.”
“Oh, and I have the private booth set aside for your friends,” he cheered.
Crap!!
I had totally forgotten that I had invited my new group of friends to the event. I didn’t have the courage to face Reyan, not yet. I had told him I didn’t want to see him so I hoped that he wouldn’t show up.
“Thanks J, you are the best.”
“Anything for you, love,” he purred.
I snorted and shook my head refusing to fire back with one of my usual comments.
“Seriously? That’s all I get? I don’t see you for four weeks and you turn into a softy?”
Darn it, Reyan. I blame you.
“Saving up energy for the night J,” I said softly.
Almost an hour and a half later, the club was loaded with the VIP guests and members of the club. I mixed up drinks and chatted away with the patrons, Dave, and Jason endlessly but could not be part of the conversations. My mind wandered back and forth, and I could not stop thinking about Reyan. I loathed being held hostage by my own emotions.
I thought I had just cleared my mind and had started focusing on the drinks I had to make, when my phone buzzed. I excused myself and took a few steps away from the bar to check my phone.
> Annie: We are here!!!
Me: Cool!! Tell the bouncer that you guys are Jason’s guests.
Me: I don’t take breaks tonight, so come grab your drink, I’ll have it ready for you!!
Annie: Muaaah!!
I smiled putting my phone away.
“That’s the first time I’ve seen a genuine smile on your face tonight, what’s up girl?” Dave observed.
“I have been a bit distracted, but I’m okay.” I smiled at Dave.
“Is your boy toy here yet and are you gonna show him off to Mr. J here?” he teased.
“No, he is not my boyfriend and was never one…now get back to work,” I mocked, swallowing the lump that formed on my throat. I wasn’t sure what to say if Reyan were to show up at the event.
“Vinnie!!” I heard Annie’s voice cut through the loud heart-thumping music and the chatter at the bar. I laughed looking at the petite yet strong personality girl walk right through the crowd. She had a presence about her that made people take a step aside to make way for her.
“Annie, I am so glad you made it,” I walked around the bar to hug her.
“Vinnie, I am so pissed off at you right now!!” she snapped.
What an ass? I never expected Reyan to go running to Annie to tell on me.
I did not respond not knowing what to say and shook my head.
“How could you not tell me about Jason? That guy is so hot!!” Annie whispered.
I was relieved to find out she was mad at me for something completely unrelated.
“Oh, Jason is kind of an ass so I didn’t think he would be good for you,” I defended.
“Stop sounding like Reyan now and set me up with him. Whatever happened to meeting Mr. Wrong so I know when I meet my Mr. Right?” she winked.
“Fine, I will introduce you to him. Where is everyone else?” I asked without looking up just so I don’t look into the overly familiar brown eyes accidentally.
“At the booth settling in...oh and why did Reyan ask me to set him up with a date for tonight?” Annie whispered leaning in.
I heard my heart crack and the pieces fall freely into my stomach, and my stomach clenched into a tight knot. I held my breath and looked at her in silence unable to find my voice.