Gray Hawk was both stunned and delighted to find the woman who plagued his dreams become a live vision as he stood on the rocks above the river. Jordan's eyes were huge, like a doe staring at a hunter. She stepped tentatively back into the water, depriving him of the view that he so hungrily devoured with his eyes. But he had seen enough, and his body was responding.
Knowing the river well, Gray Hawk gauged the distance it would take and without a second thought, jumped from his precarious position on the cliff into the cold water below. He heard her frightened yelp, and wondered if her fear was for his safety, or for herself. As he came out of the water, he watched as her face registered horror, then relief.
Although her body was submerged, Jordan wondered if he couldn't see right through the water, because his eyes were so dark with desire. "What are you doing?" she asked in a tight voice. When he said nothing, she took a step backward. Her teeth chattered, and it had nothing to do with the cold.
His gaze moved from her lips to her breasts. There was no doubt he could see through the water. Covering herself in a lame attempt at modesty, she quickly looked around, hoping someone would come and interrupt them, because right now she wasn't sure if she had the strength to resist him.
He moved so quickly, she didn't have a chance to react.
Pulling her against his chest, his lips crashed down on hers. Her hands pounded against his chest, but instead of releasing her, he held her tighter and nudged her mouth open, plunging his tongue inside.
Jordan tried not to respond to his passionate demands, but it was no use when every inch of her was pressed against his hard flesh, the desire that surged through her was more than she could fight. A second later all resistance fled as her tongue met his.
Fire raced through her veins. His hands seemed to be everywhere at once. When his hard arousal pressed against her stomach, her mind screamed for her to run, but her body refused to obey, wanting the release she craved.
Gentle fingers moved down her back, spanning her waist, then moved lower to cup her buttocks, raising her closer to the part of him that could end her torment. Suddenly he lifted her higher, his lips raining kisses over one breast, then the other. Holding onto him like a lifeline, Jordan tried to catch her breath and ease the mad pounding of her heart. His tongue flicked out, laving her nipple. A warmth flowed from her breasts, down to her belly and even lower. Her fingers wove through his hair, pressing his mouth closer.
He heard her groan low in her throat and it was his undoing. Ignoring the warning signals going off in his head, Gray Hawk continued his seduction. If this was all he could have of her, then he would take what she offered. The memory of this day would be all he would have left of her, and it would have to be enough.
Jordan's breath left her lungs as he continued his onslaught. As her head fell back, her body quivered with a need denied for far too long. Waves of pleasure washed over her, building an ache in that most private part of her.
His hand slid from her hip and moved between her thighs, achingly close to her throbbing center. Jordan's heart stilled when his fingers moved over the sensitive flesh of her womanhood. A delicious sensation began to grow in the pit of her stomach until it spread to every nerve ending.
Climbing higher and higher she reached for some unknown pinnacle. A part of her wanted him to stop, knowing what they were doing was wrong. Yet, his lips and fingers were working magic over her body, until she was sure she would burst.
Gray Hawk didn't know how much longer he could hold on. Her fingers clawed at his back as she found her release. Pulling her closer, he claimed her lips once more, swallowing her cry of passion.
With every intention of making love to her on the river's edge, he lifted her in his arms. Yet as he set her on her feet, he realized that if she gave herself to him, it would make separation more difficult. It wouldn't be fair to either one of them. A woman's maidenhead was a gift, and he had no right to take it, just as he'd had no right to take her captive.
She clung to him, her face pressed against his chest, her heart beating heavily. Gray Hawk fought the emotions that raced within him. He bent his head and kissed her slowly, knowing it would be for the last time.
It was the hardest thing he'd ever done, but he finally put her at arms length. Her brows were furrowed into a frown as she stared up at him.
He smiled softly as his fingers traced the outline of her jaw, and then her full pink lips as he memorized every detail. "I'll miss you," he said, watching as her desire cooled, turning quickly to rejection.
Unable to handle the hurt he saw in her eyes, he turned and left her, before he could change his mind.
KARI OPENED her eyes to find Shane Catalono standing at the entrance to the teepee, his hands planted on his hips. "Get up, sleepy head, it's time to go."
She sat up slowly, surprised to find Rebecca was wide awake and dressed in a pair of buckskin breeches, shirt, and moccasins.
"You have something other than that dress?" Shane asked, his gaze moving quickly over her. By the expression on his face, he obviously found her leather dress repulsive.
Kari threw the furs off and grabbed her worn pants and blouse that she'd put out for their ride to Brogan. Forcing a smile, she passed the cowboy, knowing she had to make an effort to be kind. After all, it was because of him they were leaving the village, and although he constantly taunted her, she mustn't let him nettle her. He was doing them a favor, and she owed him.
Heading toward the river for a bath, Kari kept her excitement in check. A small part of her was sad they were leaving, yet she could hardly wait to get to Brogan. Finally she and Jordan would have the independence they have craved for so long. If what Shane said was true, they would have jobs and make money in no time. Months ago she would have doubted she would like domestic work, but being in the village taught her she could do anything she set her mind to. In fact, she found she enjoyed the work, sewing especially.
Jordan passed by her, saying nothing more than, "You ready?" By the tone of her voice, it was obvious she was very ready to leave. A moment later Kari had her answer to Jordan's strange mood when she saw Gray Hawk coming toward her in long strides. His hair was wet, and water clung to his body. Kari smiled, but he did no more than nod.
Indeed, it was a good thing they were leaving today.
Kari didn't linger in the river, knowing if she didn't hurry, Shane would come looking for her. Bathing quickly, she put on the clothes she'd worn when Gray Hawk had captured her.
Shane was readying the horses, and when she approached he turned around. One dark brow lifted, and she swore she saw appreciation there. "Looks like they've seen better days."
Her shoulders slumped. "Believe it or not, these garments were new six months ago."
"A little testy this morning, Miss Hoffman?"
Folding her arms over her chest, she lifted her chin a notch. "Not at all, Mr. Catalono."
One side of his mouth lifted. "Could have fooled me?"
She'd been ready with a retort, but it died when she saw his gaze wandering down her body. To her horror, her skin tingled as though he touched her with his hands. Instinctively, she checked the buttons of her blouse to make sure they were fastened. Meeting his gaze again, his grin was so wicked, it suggested more than words ever could. "Don't worry, Miss Hoffman, I only take willing women to my bed."
His words brought an outraged gasp from her lips, loud enough to turn heads. The nerve of him to say such a thing!
"You think all women will just drop at your feet, don't you, Mr. Catalono?" Her voice was trembling, but that didn't stop her from voicing her thoughts out loud. "It's men like you who give all males a bad name."
He took the steps that separated them until she was forced to look up into his handsome face. "You wouldn't know how to handle a man like me, Miss Hoffman."
Was it her imagination or was he challenging her? "Don't flatter yourself," she replied through clenched teeth.
"Have I angered you, Miss Hoffman? Your color is
a little high, considering the coolness of the morning."
She could feel the warmth of his breath against her face. The blue of his eyes were startling, so light, so full of--what exactly? Oh, but he was so sure of himself! No doubt he was used to women throwing themselves at him. Well, not her!
"We could be friends?" His voice was deceptively soft.
Kari took a step backwards. "Fine, friends then." His hand was extended, and it took her a minute to realize he expected a handshake. Although she didn't want to, neither did she want to look childish. She grabbed his extended hand. It was rough, callused, strong, and lingered longer than necessary.
"You've rough hands for a woman."
She ripped her hand from his grasp, leveling him with a hostile glare. "I'm a woman who's used to hard work, Mr. Catalono. Yes, my hands are rough from the work I've endured. I'm sure that even the best of women, who I'm sure you know personally, should they have been in the same situation would find their hands as dry, cracked, and rough as mine."
He regarded her with amusement. "I wasn't comparing."
"Oh, yes you were."
She was flustered...and he loved it. Even though he'd told her that he wanted to be friends, she had to wonder if he was serious. He was constantly sarcastic to her, and friends weren't that way.
Turning her back on him, she missed the appreciative stare as he took in the sight of her feminine curves in pants.
Shane's mocking smile died on his lips as he watched her. Gone were any traces of the woman who lived among Indians and survived it...perhaps except for her work worn hands. He truly hadn't intended to criticize her, but when they were together, he couldn't help himself, and all his good intentions were buried in the dust.
He watched as she walked around the camp, talking and laughing with the Indians as though they were friends, and not the people who captured her. She shook each of their hands, her smile serene and peaceful by the time she returned to her horse ready to leave.
"Well, it looks like all we have to do now is wait for Jordan," she said, as she walked toward Rebecca. His gaze lingered on her derriere that was so clearly defined in her pants. A coincidence because his pants had grown uncomfortably tight in the last few minutes. He shifted on his feet, wondering why in the world he hadn't just offered to buy them tickets on the next stage out of the territory once they reached Brogan, instead of inviting them to stay with him.
AS JORDAN prepared to leave, a few friends came by to wish her well, while others showed their obvious delight she was leaving--none more so than Running Deer.
Having learned her nemesis would soon be out of the way, Running Deer was pleasant, almost taunting, and although Jordan tried not to be jealous, she was.
The woman would have Gray Hawk to herself, and Jordan would never see him again.
The thought ripped at her insides. It was crazy to want a future with him--impossible. But in her dreams lately she'd done just that. They'd been together and were so happy, living at the ranch, raising horses, having children. How happy and at peace she was in those dreams. Despite their differences, she and Gray Hawk had made things work between them.
But this was harsh reality.
There would never be anything between them, and she would never see him again. She told herself that she should thank her lucky stars that he hadn't taken her virginity, especially when she'd been so willing to give it.
Yet what frightened her more than anything was the fact that she wasn't thankful. She'd wanted Gray Hawk with a ferocity that scared her. And worse still was the fact she still wanted him.
Taking a deep breath, she headed toward the corral where Kari and Shane were on their horses packed and ready to go. Jordan helped Rebecca up, then looked around at the villagers who came to say goodbye. Not so very long ago she feared these people and now she was sad knowing she'd never see them again.
Gray Hawk wasn't among those who came to say farewell as they mounted up, and it hurt, especially with all they'd been through. She was hoping for at least one last look, to memorize his features, although they were already etched in her memory.
Certain she'd seen the last of him, she was surprised when he came out of the teepee and headed straight toward them. With heart in throat, she watched as he went to Rebecca, who was saddled up before Shane.
"Goodbye Little One," he said, his hand cupping the side of her face. "You take care of yourself."
Rebecca threw her arms around Gray Hawk's neck, clinging to him before finally letting go.
Shane shook Gray Hawk's hand, and she didn't miss the gunmetal stare that spoke volumes where words couldn't.
"Don't worry, I'll take care of them," Shane said in response to the unasked question.
Jordan could see the tears swimming in Kari's eyes as she took the hand he offered. Her own throat growing tighter by the minute, she waited for him to say goodbye to her, all the while trying to convince herself this was the way it should be.
But her defenses crumbled when he stood before her, his gray eyes staring into hers. They'd come so far together. To think she hated him not so very long ago, and now her heart was aching knowing this was to be their last goodbye. She wondered if he too was feeling the pain. He was always so good at masking his emotions, and she was curious what it was he was thinking now.
"Gray Hawk..." She hesitated, closing her mouth, taking in every feature and the familiar proud stance. "I'll miss you," she said, her voice breaking.
For a moment she thought he would touch her as his hand lifted toward her, but just as quickly, he dropped it to his side. "Take care, Jordan" he said, taking a step away. "I hope you get everything you want."
Jordan was tempted to tell him that all she wanted was for him to come with them; that perhaps together they could make a future together. Yet her gaze shifted past his shoulder to his people. She swallowed hard. This was his life. These were his people, and he would never pick her over them. Her gaze returned to him and she smiled softly. "I'll never forget you--not ever." Her voice cracked, and before she said something she would surely regret, she turned her mount toward the hills.
AS GRAY HAWK watched Jordan's back, his mind was telling him that her leaving was for the best, but his heart was telling a different story.
Once the four disappeared out of sight, the others in the village went about their normal routine, most of them relieved to have them gone, but Gray Hawk felt their absence all the way to his soul until a sense of panic came over him. He wanted Jordan desperately, with a need he never experienced before. If she would have stayed, she would be his, but he had been the one to send her away. It had been he who had given her the freedom she so craved.
"Your heart is sad."
Gray Hawk looked down at Tawanka, a woman who he loved and respected, and who had taken Jordan and Kari under her wing, showing them the ways of the Cheyenne. He nodded. "Yes."
"Perhaps you should have gone with her."
Those were not the words he expected from Tawanka, or any one of his tribe. He was a Cheyenne warrior, their war chief, a defender of his people, and they should come first always. "But this is my home."
She didn't reply, but there was something in the way she looked at him that made him wonder if she couldn't see into the future as she so often claimed.
"All will be right one day. All will be right." Without another word, she left him to his thoughts.
But the day was far too long and torturous. He tried in vain to put Jordan from his thoughts, yet the more he fought it, the more embedded she became in his memory. That night he barely ate, and went to bed early. As he lay in the teepee alone, he closed his eyes, envisioning Jordan laying there beside him, her sweet smile as she looked at him, the taste of her lips on his own, the feel of her body pressing against him in need.
Why hadn't he taken her? Why hadn't he slated his lust? Perhaps if he had, then it would have been enough.
What he needed more than anything was a woman. He should visit Running Deer, satisfy his
craving, and hope that Jordan would be just a memory. Yet as he came to his feet, he couldn't get the vision of Jordan out of his mind. Would she so easily go into the arms of another? Right now would she be sleeping with the cowboy, while trying to get him out of her mind?
He knew she wouldn't.
Laying back down on the furs, he closed his eyes, hoping he would find peace.
Chapter 13
TRAVELING WITH three females, one under the age of six, was proving to be easier than Shane originally thought it would be.
The first day they traveled in silence, each person in their own thoughts. Now on the second day of their journey home, they were making better time than he could have possibly hoped for.
The anticipation of seeing his son after being parted for over a month was enough to make him push the group even harder. They were all exhausted, and he could tell by the dark circles under their eyes that the four hours of sleep the night before hadn't been near enough, but he had no desire to stop. They could rest all they wanted once they reached the Triple T.
After long hours in the saddle, Kari rode up beside him. He was surprised since she'd been avoiding him the entire trip, and he could tell by her angry expression that she was not happy.
"Don't you think we could stop now?"
He ignored the sharpness in her voice, knowing she was tired. Hell, they were all tired. He looked past her to where his niece rested against Jordan, who stared blankly ahead. A pang of regret and guilt assaulted him. But why should he feel bad? He had done the right thing by bringing the women with him now, although this one beside him was surely getting under his skin. "I suppose we can stop for a spell."
"I meant for the night."
He looked up at the sun before turning back toward her. "Got a good hour or so of daylight left."
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