by Joanna Wylde
“Um, probably,” I told her. “I mean, I’d like to have kids someday.”
“That’s good,” she said, biting her lip. “Because we didn’t use any condoms last night, and I just realized that I forgot to refill my prescription this month.”
I blinked, growing very still. “So, you could be pregnant…?”
“Theoretically,” she said. “I mean, people have sex all the time without getting knocked up. But it’s nice to know you wouldn’t be upset. At the very least, it seemed like something I should mention before we have sex again. Because that’s the direction this is heading, right?”
“Yeah, that was the plan,” I said. “Are you okay with it?”
Her eyes turned thoughtful, and then she started to nod slowly. “I think I am. We should do this, Eli.”
“What? Fuck? Buy the bar? Get married?”
“All of it. I want to do all of it.”
“Can we start with the fucking?” I asked.
“I think that can be arranged.”
Epilogue
One year later
~Peaches~
“Okay, you can look now,” Mom said. “What do you think?”
I opened my eyes, gasping at my reflection in the half-circle of mirrors strategically surrounding my little platform. I still looked like me, of course—same dark hair, although it’d gotten thicker. Same face, complete with a random zit on the chin. Same waistline I’d had when Eli and I had finally admitted how we felt about each other.
Hadn’t seen that for a while.
Kinda nice to realize it still existed, even if it took a corset to coax it out.
My boobs were another story. They’d always been generous, and they’d gotten more so with a side of backache once the babies arrived. I’d come to accept this new reality, even if I wasn’t totally comfortable with it. Usually, I just threw on a big T-shirt and called it good.
This dress was a hell of a lot more tailored than a T-shirt, though. I took a deep breath—well, as deep as I could—watching first with awe and then something closer to fear as my chest expanded upward and outward from the dress, yet somehow didn’t break free in an explosion of overpriced fabric.
“Do you have any idea how much money you could make stripping right now?” Megan asked.
“Not enough to cover daycare for twins,” I told her, turning to the side to study my profile. Holy shit, was that really me in the mirror? Nipped-in tummy, massive rack. Hips that flared out just the right amount, all draped in a classic white mermaid dress so perfect a princess could’ve worn it.
“Do you see that?” I asked. “Or am I hallucinating?”
“See what?” Mom asked.
“My waist,” I said, feeling almost giddy.
“Of course, I can see your waist,” she said. “Don’t tell me you aren’t happy with your figure, Peaches, because you look amazing. I know you’re frustrated that you haven’t lost all the weight yet. But that’s not realistic. Women are supposed to have some extra while they’re nursing. It took a million years of evolution to create those curves of yours, and you should be proud of them.”
I laughed, shaking my head.
“I’m not upset,” I told her. “I’m just excited to see it again. When the salesperson brought that corset into the changing room, I thought she was crazy. I’m a believer now.”
“Foundation garments are critical,” said the sales associate, smiling at me.
“What about her boobs?” asked Randi, one of my friends. We’d grown up together, but we’d only gotten really close over the last couple of years. “I think it’s amazing they haven’t popped out yet, but that fabric looks really delicate. Are you sure it’ll hold?”
“This is where strategic taping comes in,” the associate said, her voice confident. “It may look like her décolletage is insecure, but she could jump on a trampoline if she wanted to. We take these things very seriously.”
I gave a little hop, watching as my girls flew up and then came in for a safe landing.
“We’ll take it,” Mom announced. “All of it. And throw in some extra tape, too.”
“It’s too much,” I said, shaking my head. “Things are tight enough already financially, and we’re still getting hospital bills. It’s really gorgeous, but I can’t justify it. What about that other one? The one on sale?”
Megan and Randi exchanged dark looks, and the sales associate literally flinched—a response reflected back to me in all six mirrors.
“James and I will be paying for the dress,” Mom said.
“Mom—”
“He said if you argued, I should threaten to tell you what we did in bed last night. And then again this morning. I don’t want to give out any spoilers, but it involved a new kind of lube. Originally developed at NASA, according to James. You can use it for anything, but I really like it for—”
My vision narrowed, turning black around the edges as I swayed. The sales lady and Randi each caught one of my arms, easing me down.
“Are you all right?” Randi asked. I shook my head.
“No,” I said, shuddering.
“Still want to argue about who’s paying for the dress?” Mom asked.
I looked up at her, wondering how such a sweet-looking woman could be so sadistic.
“Thank you very much for your generous gift.”
Two hours later, I walked through the door of the Starkwood Saloon in full wedding hair and makeup. It was only a test run, but seeing my sleep-deprived eyes without black circles was almost as good as discovering I still had a waist.
Several of our regulars were already there for the afternoon, all of them asking about the wedding plans as I passed through. I answered as quickly as possible, eager to see my babies. The office door stood open a few inches, which meant they weren’t asleep. They weren’t crying, either. Things must’ve gone well.
“Eli, you won’t believe—” The words died as I stepped into the room. “I didn’t realize Gus was here.”
Eli sat on the couch, cradling Lynette as he gave her a bottle. Next to him was Gus, holding my son, Augie. Gus looked up at me, his face full of wonder.
“I can’t believe how tiny they are,” he said. “You did a hell of a job, Peaches.”
“I thought you were still in Mexico,” I said slowly. “You should’ve let us know you’d be in town.”
“So you could avoid me?” he asked. I considered lying, but decided the truth was better.
“Yes.”
I shot a dirty look at Eli, which he pretended not to notice. We’d have words about this little ambush later.
“Gus needs to talk to you about something.”
“I’m not sure we have anything to talk about.”
“I’m pretty sure you do,” Eli said, leaning forward a little to balance himself before standing up from the couch. “Lynette and I are gonna go check on the bar.”
He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek as he brushed past, which I allowed because I looked particularly good at the moment. Best for him to be fully aware of what he was missing when he didn’t get laid tonight.
I closed the door, then walked over to the couch. Gus looked old, especially next to the baby. I wanted to rip Augie out of his arms, but my boy was asleep. Eli and I had a second rule now—never wake a sleeping baby. And it came with built-in consequences.
“You had something you wanted to say?” I asked.
The old man nodded.
“I love you,” he said.
“Great,” I told him. “Glad we clarified that. You can leave now.”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t a better man,” he added. “I’m really proud of you, Peaches.”
Silence fell between us, broken only by a tiny baby snore.
“You know I love you, too,” I told Gus.
“You always have. I took that for granted for a long time. I won’t do that ever again.”
His words pulled at my heart, reminding me of how much faith I’d put in him. How much I’d been willin
g to overlook. A part of me wanted to fall into his arms and cry because he’d always been my safe place.
“I had you on a hell of a pedestal,” I admitted. “I should’ve seen it earlier.”
“That I’m a selfish bastard?” he asked, quirking his mouth.
“Something like that.”
“I can’t go back and change things, baby girl,” he said quietly. “But I’d sure like the chance to prove I’m a changed man now.”
“Actions speak louder than words,” I said. Augie snorted, stirring in Gus’s arms. We both watched as little hand stretched open, then relaxed again as he drifted back to sleep.
“I understand,” Gus said. “I know it won’t happen overnight. But sooner or later—if you give me a chance—it’ll happen. You’ll see that I’ve changed.”
“Did you have anything else you wanted to talk about?” I said, suddenly uncomfortable. “I’m sure you have things to do. Wouldn’t want to keep you.”
“I have a present for you,” he said, nodding toward a large manila envelope sitting on the desk. “You and the babies. Go ahead and open it. Eli already knows about it.”
“Nice of you guys to wait for me…”
“I needed to run it by him,” Gus explained. “Make sure he understood.”
I shot him a look, then picked up the envelope. A sheaf of papers slid out, and I skimmed the one on top. Letterhead from a lawyer’s office. Was I reading it wrong? Because it looked like…
“It’s the house,” Gus said. “I’m giving it to you.”
I blinked. “You’re giving me and Eli the house?”
“No,” he said. “I’m giving you the house. I’m hoping you and Eli will decide to live there, but that’s your decision to make. Not mine.”
“Why?” I asked, stunned. “This isn’t about money, Gus. You can’t buy me off with a house. I can’t accept this.”
“Don’t accept it for yourself. Accept it for your babies. You can sell it someday, maybe pay for their college.”
“I have absolutely no clue what to say,” I admitted. “This feels wrong. Weird. What the fuck, Gus?”
“I want you to have it because I made a promise to your mother,” he said. “When she left me.”
“What was that?”
“That if she let me stay in your life, I’d never hurt you. And then I broke that promise. Like you said, actions speak louder than words. I can’t give her the security or peace of mind that I took from her all those years ago. But I can give it to you, and her grandchildren. This is my apology.”
My eyes watered, and I blinked furiously, trying not to cry. “Fuck you, Gus. I can’t believe I’m falling for your shit again.”
“So you’ll take the house?”
I reached for a tissue from the box on the desk, blotting my eyes carefully, then nodded.
“I’ll take it. But I’m still pissed at you for a lot of reasons. Including fucking up my makeup when I finally look decent for the first time in months.”
A slow smile spread across his face, and Gus looked ten years younger. “Thank you, baby.”
“Don’t read too much into it,” I snapped. “I’m not asking you to walk me down the aisle.”
“I know.”
The door opened.
“All good in here?” Eli asked, pitching his voice low as he stepped inside. “Lynette fell asleep.”
“Not yet,” I replied. “But it will be. Kids will have to share a bedroom, though. Sooner or later, we’ll have to tell them we did the same thing. Could get weird.”
“Shit,” said Gus. “I hadn’t thought of that.”
“It’ll be fine,” Eli told me. “We’ll just need to make sure they’re both scared of snakes. Mutually assured destruction.”
“Is that how it works?” I asked.
“It’s always worked for us,” he replied. “Hey, Gus?”
“Yeah?”
“Why don’t you take Augie for a little walk so I can have some alone time—well, partial alone time—with his mama.”
“Too soon,” I told him. “I’m still pissed at you for setting up an ambush.”
Eli gave me a look. “Seriously?”
I decided to let him off the hook. “No, I’m not pissed at you. But I’m not ready to let him take Augie for walks around the bar yet, either.”
“That’s good with me,” Gus said, clearing his throat. “Because I think this kid needs to be changed. That’s a little outside my area of expertise.”
“I got it,” Eli said.
“I can do it,” I told him. “You watched him all afternoon.”
“Yeah, but he might spray you and ruin your makeup. That’ll put you in a bad mood, which could fuck up my plan to get laid tonight.”
“So you think you’re getting laid tonight?” I asked, catching a strand of my hair, then twisting it around my finger.
“Pretty sure of it,” Eli said.
“Why’s that?”
“Because I have something you want.”
“I’m still in the room,” Gus said. “Just in case you’ve forgotten.”
“Shut up, Gus,” I said, watching as Eli carefully set Lynette down in her little bassinet. He walked over to the battered old file cabinet that’d been in the office for years, opened the bottom drawer, and pulled out a brown paper bag. It looked old, and I could see dust in the creases.
“I meant to give you this years ago,” Eli said. “But I kept putting it off, and then I forgot about it. When Gus talked to me about giving you the house, it came back to me.”
“I had no clue it was in his closet,” Gus said, clearing his throat. “He only told me this morning.”
I frowned as Eli handed me the bag. The paper was stiff, but after a few seconds, I managed to open it. What was that? It almost looked like...
“No way,” I said, pulling out a little stuffed animal. He looked exactly the same…well, mostly the same, anyway. Probably better not to think about his tail. “It’s Lemur. I thought you buried him out in the woods!”
“I know,” Eli said, clearing his throat. “I always planned to give him back. I really did. The tail, too. That was supposed to be a joke, but then you freaked out, and I realized how bad I fucked up.”
“Why didn’t you just tell me?” I asked. “I missed him so much, Eli.”
He shrugged. “Maybe holding onto him was an excuse.”
“To do what? Fight with me?”
“Fighting was better than nothing,” Eli said. “In a weird way, Lemur tied us together. Except we’ve got kids now, and we’re getting married. Pretty sure I can fight with you anytime I want at this point.”
I hugged Lemur close, closing my eyes to savor the feel of his tiny body in my arms. It wasn’t the same, though. He smelled weird. And his fur wasn’t as soft as I remembered. Nowhere near as soft as Lynette’s and Augie’s hair.
“I’ll take him now,” Eli said to Gus. I opened my eyes to watch them—the two most important men in my life, carefully transferring my son from one set of hands to the next, and something inside me shifted.
It took a second to realize what it was.
My anger.
It was gone.
Gus had been right. He’d said it would happen, and it had. I’d forgiven him. It didn’t change what’d happened in the past, and I had no clue how things would be in the future. But for the first time since I was five years old, everything was right again.
I gave Lemur another hug, then set him down on the couch. Lynette had started to wake up, and she needed me a lot more than Lemur did. Someday, she’d be big enough to have tea parties on the porch, I realized.
My porch.
I couldn’t wait.
* * * *
Also from 1001 Dark Nights and Joanna Wylde, discover Shade’s Lady and Rome’s Chance.
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