“Have you been reading Shakespeare again?”
“You do know there are other classical writers other than Shakespeare, right?”
I waved the question off and finished putting my name tag on before heading out. I didn’t need to listen to one of Jo’s literature rants. After all, I had a sexy Santa to scope out.
***
I looked at the clock to check the time. Sure enough, it was hitting noon, and I looked down at the paper Jo and I had been keeping track on to see twenty-six little tallies there.
“Dammit,” I sighed, shaking my head. I had really thought it was far too early in December for families to be all gung-ho about Christmas, but it just went to show what I knew about the holiday.
“Oh, would you look what we have here? It seems like someone is gonna have to go make acquaintances with the cute Santa!”
Sighing, I straightened my outfit and crossed over to the line of kids. Luckily, with it being noon and almost all our customers heading for lunch, there were only two before me and none lined up behind me as we waited. I almost wished a huge line would come so I could make the excuse of not depriving the customers, but of course, the store had practically turned into a graveyard.
I reached the guy, and I had to say, the costume really did a good job of making him look old and pudgy. He had on a thick white beard, a fake stomach, and what looked like blush on his cheeks.
He waited until all the children were away before looking to me. “What’s up?” he asked, voice still low and sexy. “Did Jimmy need something?”
“Oh, uh, no,” I said, fumbling with how exactly I was supposed to explain this. “I just, uh, I—”
“She lost a bet with little ol’ me and now has to sit on Santa’s lap,” Jo said, apparently having snuck up behind me while I was in line. For being a chubby girl who was almost six feet tall, she certainly could move quietly.
“Oh, is that’s what’s going on?” the Santa said, laughing richly. “Who am I to let an opportunity like that pass me up?” He made a broad gesture to his lap. “By all means, have a seat.”
Why was I suddenly feeling so chicken? It wasn’t like this meant anything or was some sort of sexual contract. I just needed to sit on some hot guys lap and that was that.
In reality, I knew exactly what it was. With everything that happened with my ex two months ago, I was still recovering. Part of that meant I had difficulty trusting or being comfortable around men my age. He had really done a number over on me, and it had been one of the hardest things I had ever gone through. Which was saying a lot considering what else had happened to me all during the Christmas season.
But a bet was a bet was a bet, so it wasn’t like I had a ton of choices in the matter.
I stepped up onto the platform and turned around, lowering myself onto his bright red lap.
Oh, man! I did not expect him to be so well-built, but I could already feel the forms of his muscles against my rear end. Jo, naturally, was loving it and whipped her cell phone from her bra to snap what seemed like a hundred and one pictures.
I sat there patiently, painting a massive grin on my face to look that much cheesier in the ridiculous situation. But as the whole situation ended, and Jo firmly tucked her phone back into her shirt, I could have sworn I felt something poking against my bottom.
I bolted upright, my eyes going wide, and I turned to look at the Santa in surprise. It seemed so incongruent with the rest of his outfit, but the only way I could describe his expression was utterly wanton with passion.
My face flushed red, and my heart skipped a beat. If I didn’t know better, I would say he wanted me.
What the hell?
I didn’t know what to say, so I just tipped my head in what I hoped was an appropriate way to say thank you for borrowing someone’s lap and then walked off quickly. Geeze. Had it all been in my head? Or had he really gotten a hard-on just from me sitting on him?
Either way, I didn’t think I would be taking any more bets from Jo anytime soon.
Chapter 3
Drayer
I looked around carefully to make sure we were alone as I put my beard on. Since I was Santa, I had to roll into the store a half an hour after opening which made me miss the first shift of actual openers but put me in before the relief shift came in.
Which meant I had the employee locker room and bathroom completely to myself.
Oh, and Nick too. Apparently working there for five years had given him the perk of never having to come in to open and only to help after people set things up.
“Hey, you know everyone who works here, right?”
Nick looked to me, an eyebrow raised like he knew exactly what I was going to ask him. “Yeah. Why?”
“Um, there’s this girl walking around. Short, dark hair. Petite. Big blue eyes. You know her?”
He practically snorted. “I’m about ninety-five percent sure you’re talking about Ella, and she’s the girl I’m always telling you to meet. Seriously, bro, I’ve been trying to give you the in for two years, and you’re telling me you noticed her on your first day on the job?”
“Wait, are you serious?”
“As a heart attack, my friend.”
“Well, shit.”
“Looks like you’re gonna need to get her number, my friend.” Nick just chuckled and walked off, leaving me to finish dressing and head out to my throne at the North Pole. “Oh, and, I told ya so.” That was his parting gift before he was out the door.
Naturally, on my way there, I spotted Ella talking to a customer. She was so drop-dead gorgeous, and her look was exactly my type, so of course, I couldn’t help it when I popped a woody after she had sat on me. I mean, could anyone blame me? She looked cute enough to be a Christmas elf but still had plenty of curves on her shorter frame to show she was undeniably a grown woman.
But as much as I would like to brush the incident off, I knew it wasn’t the best first impression I could have made. I tried to counter it by politely wishing her friend a good rest of her shift and being as polite as possible, but Ella had booked it too quickly for me to gauge whether she was disgusted by my body’s reaction.
I was so busy observing Ella that I almost didn’t notice the work bulletin board as I passed it. Someone had placed a colorful piece of neon paper on it, and my eyes went straight to it.
A holiday Christmas party, huh? That would be a great opportunity to get to know Ella. If I played my cards right, maybe this month wouldn’t have to be so lonely.
I ripped one of the reminder cards from the bottom and tucked it into my pocket. Whistling, I continued my journey to my seat at the North Pole.
I had honestly thought I would have to tolerate the job a lot more. And while I did have to deal with a few bratty kids every now and then, most of them were pretty sweet, and I enjoyed making them laugh and giggle. The moms weren’t half-bad either. Most of them just wanted pictures of their little babies with Santa, and getting them made them as pleased as punch.
The morning went by quickly, and before I knew it, Nick was coming by to tell me it was my break. I finished up with the couple of kiddies still in line, laughing and shaking my belly, before making my way to the break room.
As luck would have it, none other than Ella was sitting at one of the tables, her head bent over a book.
Drat. I didn’t want to interrupt her. If there was one thing I had learned from my many literature-inclined friends, it was that you didn’t try to talk to someone while they were reading.
I helped myself to some of the coffee and sat not quite across from her but close enough that I could strike up a conversation if she did ever put the novel down.
I kept my eye on the clock, however. The last thing I wanted to do was overstay my break and end up on bad terms when I was so recently hired. Although I planned on quitting in January, I still wanted to leave on good terms. Plus, I didn’t like the idea of making the kiddies wait any longer than they had to, especially considering how busy their parents were.
But, to my utter surprise, it was Ella who spoke to me first. Setting down her book, she gave me a bit of a smirk.
“You clean up well,” she said, the corner of her plush lips going up even more.
I gave her a hearty Santa laugh and rubbed my stuffed belly. “What can I say? Some men are just born with it.”
“Oh, wow. You’re so humble for being so genetically blessed.”
“Well, you know, I try to keep a level head. Not the easiest thing to do considering I’m the patron of all of Christmas, but it’s a work in progress.”
She laughed at that and slid her book into the purse beside her. I noticed it was a bit worn and even looked like it had been patched up in a few places. Maybe a possible Christmas present idea then? I tucked that into the back of my mind for later.
“Then I wish you the best in your self-improvement. I know the mantle of the jolliest, most wonderful man must be quite the heavy one.” She tipped her head, and then she was walking out. I could only stare at her, perhaps a bit in shock, wondering what had brought that on and how I could repeat the experience.
The rest of the day went well, without a single person puking, peeing, or crying on me. Sure, there was a stinky diaper or two, but that was what life was like sometimes when dealing with little ones. When I finished, the manager stopped me to tell me I was doing great, and I walked out of the doors feeling pretty good about myself.
But as soon as I was home, my thoughts immediately went to Ella, to the sly curve of her lips, the way her eyes crinkled, the sound of her voice, and even the sweet way she dealt with tedious customers. I felt myself already tenting in my pants and heaved a sigh. What time was it anyway?
Glancing at my phone, I saw it was just after ten. Not the worst time to get into bed and put myself to sleep. With a shrug, I went through my night routine, showering and washing my hair and all that. But almost as soon as I was under the covers, my hand was in my pajama bottoms, and I was palming myself.
I could see her so clearly as we bantered, her eyes flashing and her poise impeccable. I thought about all the things I wanted to do to her, and all of the ways she would challenge me in return. I could very easily imagine her being a saucy sort of lover, one who pinched or flipped things over and clearly kept you on your toes. The very thought made my length throb in my own grip, and I let out a gasp.
I thought about the erection I got the day before from her just sitting on my lap, and how good her soft body had felt pressed into my lap. She was surprisingly warm and so perfectly soft, I wanted to bury myself within her.
That last mental image was enough to do it for me, and I was releasing all over my hand and comforter. Oh. Well, I was going to definitely need to do some laundry, but that could wait until tomorrow.
For now, I had the feeling I had some very vibrant dreams to get to.
Chapter 4
Ella
“Why does our work have to pay us on Wednesdaaaayyyy?” I groaned, lying on Jo’s carpeted floor like I was a starfish.
“Because having a non-traditional pay period is cheaper, and you know how the department store is struggling in today’s economy, so they’re going to take every step they can to save money.”
I rolled my eyes. “No one asked for your logic.”
She laughed and tossed my jacket at me. “Come on. Bundle up for us to go.”
“But I don’t wanna!” I was being extra petulant, but it was my only day off in what felt like forever, and Jo miraculously had off too. We were supposed to veg out, watch stupid movies and maybe a few comedies, and then drink until we were sleepy enough to pass out on her couch.
“Isn’t your phone bill due, like, tomorrow?”
“Fair enough.” I rolled onto my stomach and pushed myself up, feeling my back crack as I got to my feet. Geeze, I was tense. I really needed a massage, but it wasn’t like I would be able to afford that anytime soon.
With a few more grunts and whines, I successfully bundled myself up and followed along beside Jo.
Thankfully, the subway wasn’t nearly as crowded as it was on the weekends, and we both got to sit the entire way. I berated myself for the tenth time that I should get direct deposit, but after a couple of horrible experiences when I was younger where my checks had been deposited in a coworker’s account instead of mine for two weeks without my noticing, I was a little wary of it.
We marched in with purpose and headed straight to the office where, sure enough, Jimmy was handing out checks.
“Wow, I’m surprised you two came in on your day off.”
“Desperate times call for desperate measures,” I answered with more than a fair bit of cheek. He shook his head, long since used to Jo and my shenanigans, and handed us our little money slips.
We headed out, and I was already planning on what lunch I would treat myself to when I suddenly realized someone was standing in front of me.
Startled, I stopped in my tracks and looked up to see none other than Drayer, dressed in casual clothes instead of his normal outfit.
God, he was so yummy. He had no right to look so good in plain old jeans and a muscle shirt, and yet there he was, looking like a model. It was such a strange conflict to feel both immediate attraction and immediate distrust, so I had no idea what to do about the whole situation.
“Hi,” I said, keeping my tone flat.
“Hi,” he answered back. “You here for your paychecks?”
“Why else would we lug ourselves through the cold on our days off?” Jo asked, snorting slightly.
“Hah, right?” But I could tell our weekly pay was not what he wanted to talk about. “Hey, Ella, are you going to the Christmas party next Saturday?”
“Um, I’m not sure, to be honest.”
“Well, yeah, I’d much rather you be honest than deceitful.”
I didn’t know why I kept talking, but before I could stop myself, words were coming out of my mouth, and I was smirking like we were both goddamned hilarious. “I’ll make sure to put that under your preferences.”
“Oh, you’re keeping a list, are you?” He jammed his hands in his pocket and gave me a broad wink. “I could think of much more interesting things to put down.”
“I’m sure you could,” I countered. “But who they are interesting to is under debate.”
“Fair enough, but if you’re ever curious, I think you’ll find I’m an open book.”
“I would make a pun about checking you out of a local library, but then I’m sure you’d counter with something about fines, and then we’d miss our ride.” Deciding enough was enough, I strode past him, my heart thundering. “But we’ll see you tomorrow, Mr. Santa.”
That same expression of utter desire was on his face again as I glanced over my shoulder. It thrilled me, but it also made me feel incredibly nervous. If there was one thing I had learned, it was that you couldn’t trust anyone and men especially.
“Oooh, what was that?” Jo asked as soon as we were outside and back in the cold.
“What do you mean?” I asked, rolling my eyes.
“You were flirting! Like really, hard-core flirting. I haven’t seen you do that since … since you know.”
“We were not flirting.” I marched primly ahead of her. But, as much as I would deny it always and forever verbally, I couldn’t lie to myself. I had been flirting. What was wrong with me? I had sworn off relationships for the foreseeable future, so why was I bantering back and forth like I was interested?
“Oh my god, you totally were! Come on, the chemistry between you two was practically palpable.”
“You should really stop pushing things so hard. It’s not good for you.”
“Yeah, yeah, deny it all you want, but both you and I know what’s what.”
“What’s up is your overactive imagination. Just because a guy is hot, and I talk to him for all of two seconds, doesn’t mean I’m pining for him like some sort of forlorn lover.”
“So, you do think he’s cute then?”
I leveled my gaze at her, giving her a look that said exactly what I was thinking. “I have eyes, Jo. Anybody can see he’s fairly good looking.” Boy that was the understatement of the year. He was unfairly hot, and that crooked sort of smile he liked to pull was almost straight poison to my ovaries. He was the kind of guy the old me would have absolutely fallen for, but after my ex, I had sworn off all forms of romance until I graduated and in a new dating pool.
Besides, he was a coworker. If there was one thing I knew, it was not to crap where you eat and to leave the workplace romances alone.
“You can try to deny it all you want, but I see what’s going on,” Jo insisted.
I turned back to face the direction I was walking and ignored her. What was that phrase? Once bitten, twice shy? Well, I was more like quad-bitten, forever shy, and that was just the way it was always going to be.
Chapter 5
Drayer
I looked at the newly posted schedule and couldn’t stop the cheer that came out of my mouth. Jimmy had told me he was trying to get me a weekend replacement, and it looked like he had done just that, which meant I was getting Saturday and Sunday off.
Sure, not having the overtime would suck, but I already was at forty-four hours, so I supposed I didn’t have much to complain about. Besides, I could really use the downtime and a chance to not have to wear a scratchy beard and big, fake belly.
A quick look at my watch told me I still had about fifteen minutes before I needed to start getting dressed, so I headed toward the break room, figuring it would be empty since all of the openers were still, well, opening.
Sure enough, only Nick was there, helping himself to some break room pastries and generally looking like he could use a few more hours of sleep. I grabbed one myself and sat across from him, leaning my chin on my hand while I chewed.
My Sexy Santa Page 2