by Anne Conley
Rafe grabbed Grace's legs and put his shoulders under them, wrapping his hands around the tops of her thighs. He wanted to feel them squeezing against his ears, and from this position, he could use his hands to bring her pleasure.
One hand opened her folds while the other inserted a finger. He could feel the vibrations of her body, as it hummed with pleasure. His tongue continued flicking the tiny bud, while his finger slid in and out of her. Rafe could feel her body tense, and he put a second finger inside her, slipping it in and out of the folds. Her pearl was standing at attention, and Rafe used his tongue to flick and suck on it until he could feel Grace's climax shudder through her. Her thighs squeezed his head, as her muscles contracted around his fingers, and he could hear her cry out to the heavens as he continued to lap up her climax, savoring the sweet tang of her passion on his tongue.
When the spasms had abated and her gasps had turned to soft moans of contentment, he disentangled himself from her legs. Rafe crawled back up her limp body, to kiss her softly before pulling her into his arms and cradling her.
"I love you Grace. I've fallen for you. And I intend to show you how much I want to take care of you. Forever."
They lay like that for a while, catching their breath. Grace snuggled into Rafe's body, and he enjoyed the skin to skin contact.
Her hands idly played in his hair, sending a shock of tingly goosebumps down his back, as she murmured sounds of contentment. Rafe kissed her neck, where his face was inhaling her scent. She smelled like sunshine, sweat, and sex.
He loved this woman so much it hurt.
"So what happens now?"
He raised himself up on one elbow and looked down at her, fear gripping his belly. She hadn't lied to him earlier, he would have known, but the uncertainty in her eyes scared him nonetheless.
"What do you mean?"
"With…us. What happens with us?"
Grace, I want to spend a lifetime with you, making you scream with pleasure every night, making you laugh every day, making you feel contentment in immeasurable ways… "We go on with life, as a couple, until you realize that we're made for each other. I won't push you for more."
He knew she loved him, he could see it spilling out of her face, the contented smile, the sheen of her eyes, the flush in her cheeks. He would wait until she realized it, though. He meant what he said, he couldn't push her, or she would retreat back behind the walls she'd erected around herself.
Rafe felt a lump of emotion form in his throat as she snuggled into his body. This was heaven, right here. This was what all the fuss was about. He realized that this moment was what made poets write flowery imagery. He was overflowing with emotion that he had to hold back. If he let it loose, he would scare her. So he kissed the top of her head, and held her tight. Minutes later, her breaths were even as she slept.
Chapter Twenty-three
Grace woke up, remarkably satisfied. Feeling the strong arms wrapped around her and the familiar legs entangled with hers, she sighed deeply, contented. Examining the sensations and emotions swirling around her, she realized that she was actually happy, here in Rafe's arms.
Turning to face him, she saw he was awake, watching her with sleepy eyes.
"Good morning, beautiful." His smile broke his face wide open, and Grace felt cherished.
She raised her arm to tuck a stray lock of hair behind his ear and smiled back. "What did I do to deserve you, Rafe?"
He brought forth something in Grace that she was afraid to name. If she put a label on the emotion, she would have to give up a part of herself. A few weeks ago, she would have said that's what he wanted, but now she wasn't so sure.
After showering, Rafe tossed her her purse, and said, "Come on. We're getting out of here."
"Where are we going?" Grace's eyes widened in surprise.
"We're going to spend the day together, doing fun stuff. You need to spend time away." He came nearer, sending Grace's heart thumping. What was it about this man that made her an incoherent mess? He leaned in and his smell overwhelmed her senses. "I want to spend time with you."
Down in the lobby, Uri was waiting, Heather clinging to his waist like a lifeline. Grace thought, "That's a fairy tale love. They don't want to spend a second out of each other's sight." She had seen the way they interacted the day before, and it was nothing but respect and admiration for each other. They sent each other glances from across the table and whispered secrets into each other's ear. It was so sweet, and Grace felt a little pang of longing for something like that with Rafe. Could it be that way with him?
"They're giving us a ride to the car lot. We're getting you a new car."
Shocked, "What? I don't have the money for a car, yet."
"I do."
"You are not buying me a car, Rafe."
"Then I'm loaning you the money for a car, Grace. Pay me back when you get it." She saw the determination in the steely glint of his eyes, in the square of his shoulders, and the way his feet were planted on the lobby floor in front of her.
"How do I even know you'll be around when I finally get the money, Rafe?"
His hands snaked around her waist, and he pulled her into an embrace, resting his forehead on hers. She admitted to herself that he clouded her thoughts, even when he wasn't inside her head.
"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right by your side until you tell me what I want to hear. And then I'll be by your side for the rest of your life." He crushed his mouth to hers in a kiss that ended all discussions. Wobbly in the knees, Grace meekly followed everybody out the door and into Uri's car.
They drove to a used car lot near the hotel, and Uri dropped them off. Seeing a sure sale, an eager salesman with glinting eyes and cheap dress-slacks rushed out the door to greet Rafe and Grace.
Extending his hand to Rafe, "I'm Danny. I see you need a ride." He gestured to Uri's car, leaving the lot.
Rafe's handshake lasted slightly longer than was polite, and Grace wondered if he was hopping inside the salesman's head. He’d said he’d lost that power, but there must be some residual something there, because she could see something plainly going on with the handshake. Feeling resigned to her fate, she didn't mind. She'd been screwed at the car lot before, and would take any advantage she could get.
Before Rafe could take over, she jumped in. "Yes. I need something dependable and cheap."
Danny perused her up and down, straight-faced, before glancing at Rafe again, briefly. He spun around and grabbed a couple of keys out of the office and led them to a row of cars parked behind the office. These weren't the flashy cars displayed up front. These were exactly what Grace wanted. An Acura, a Civic, and a Sorento were all lined up, clean and shiny, waiting for her to choose.
Two hours later, the deal was done. Rafe managed to haggle the man down to a price that Grace was willing to pay him back, and they left with a new/used Acura with a clear title.
In spite of the fact that she was feeling beholden to Rafe for purchasing the car, she was really pleased with it. It had more bells and whistles than any other car she'd ever had: power windows, a sun roof, and it had an automatic transmission, which was pure luxury for Grace, who'd driven stick shifts her entire life.
She pulled out on the Interstate, playing with the sunroof, while Rafe plugged her iPod into the speaker system.
"Where to now, Rafe?" She asked over the wind whipping her hair around.
"I want to meet your family."
She stilled in her seat, hands clutching the steering wheel. "Why?"
He smiled at her. "I just do, Grace. I want to see where you came from. Please?"
Grace continued driving, thinking to herself. It had been a while since she'd seen her mom and Carl, and Rafe was her boyfriend now, right? Most boyfriends got to meet families, even though Grace had never made the special trip to the other side of Houston to introduce one to her mom before.
"It's not that big of a deal, Rafe. You're not going to get any huge insights about me from meeting Mom."
; "Maybe not, but I'd still like to."
Her nerves were suddenly in her throat, and she wanted anything else but for Rafe to meet her mom. What if Mom said something embarrassing? What if she assumed something about Rafe? What if Carl was there? Would Rafe get any ideas about what would be expected in a relationship with her, based on her mom's relationship with Carl?
"At least if I get to see them together, I'll know how not to treat you…" He said hopefully. She glanced over at him, and the pleading look in his eyes decided for her.
She couldn't say no.
"Fine." She growled at him, stepping on the gas to increase her speed. She suddenly wanted to get the visit over with. "Just a short visit, and you're taking me someplace nice for dinner afterward."
He chuckled in response, and they drove the hour and a half to Grace's mom's house, making conversation about favorite music and food. Rafe was a bit uneducated about both, and Grace enjoyed introducing him to her iPod music and telling him about the joys of Italian food.
Eventually, they pulled into the driveway of a tiny house in dire need of a paint job. An old rusted out car sat in the yard on blocks, surrounded by a barbecue pit and empty beer cans.
Grace took a deep breath, exhaling a long sigh. Turning to Rafe, she asked, "You ready?"
He grinned at her, that smile that split his face in half, blasting her with dimply goodness. She got out of the car and started walking up to the door. Rafe followed quickly.
She knocked on the door once, and it was answered by a woman who could be none other than Grace's mother. She was tall, like Grace and had the same blond hair and blue eyes. There were more lines on her face, but it was the same. When she saw who stood at her door, the lines around her eyes and mouth broadened when she smiled, transforming her face into a thing of beauty.
"Grace!" She clasped her daughter into a bone-crushing hug, before pulling apart and looking at her, tears in the woman's eyes. "Carl!" She yelled over her shoulder. "Grace is home!"
A man that had at one time been handsome came lurching into the foyer, a beer in one hand. "Hey, Grace. Lookin' good. You married, yet?"
Grace shook her head and grabbed Rafe's hand, pulling him forward. "Mom, Carl, I want you to meet Rafe."
"Hey, buddy. Wanna beer? Y'all stayin' that long?"
"Yeah, go ahead Rafe. I need to talk to Mama for a minute." Rafe looked at her before nodding and following Carl to the kitchen.
Grace and her mother sat in the aluminum clam shell chairs on the front porch for a while before Jeannie broke the awkward silence.
"I see you seem to have found a man."
"Yeah, and he's going to be good for me, I think."
"That's good." More awkward silence. Jeannie's hands were in constant motion, fiddling with the skirt of her faded sundress. "I'm glad you came out."
"Yeah, me too." Grace was glad. Something about seeing her mother again was helping with the pain of thinking about her. Suddenly, she wasn't as angry, and she couldn't explain why.
"I know you don't like to visit."
"It's not that, Mama…It's just…" What?
"You've made your feeling about Carl clear. Crystal clear. I know you don't like him."
"I know you love him. I just don't like how he takes advantage of you all the time. And you let him."
"I know I do, but it's my life." Jeannie smiled ruefully. "I'm a big girl. It's time for you to learn from my mistakes and not repeat them. Just quit dwelling on them."
Grace didn't know what to say to that. She just sat there, staring at her mother's hands. Hands that looked older than her mother's true age. Hard-working hands.
"Can I tell you something?"
"Sure, Mama."
"Love is one of those things…It's the best feeling in the world, and it's the worst feeling in the world. But the good outweighs the bad. I'm not trying to excuse the way I've treated you, the way I've ignored you at times, I'm just trying to explain a little of why, if it makes any sense."
"I know, Mama. I think I'm figuring that out."
Jeannie turned her body towards Grace. "I realize that you probably don't put much stock in what I say about love."
"I didn't used to, but I'm willing to listen now, Mama." Grace reached out her hand and squeezed her mother's gently. "I stopped by here because Rafe wanted to meet you. I decided to tell you I'm not going to give you a hard time about Carl anymore. If you're happy, I'm happy. I promise."
They hugged, silent tears streaming down both faces, before going back inside the house. They found Carl and Rafe sitting at the kitchen table laughing.
"Jeanie. You won't believe this. Rafe just bought Grace a car. She let him do it, too. I'm shocked." Looking back at Rafe, he said, "You must have bewitched her or something. She’s never let guys do stuff like that for her." He was laughing a silent wheezing laugh that had tears streaming down his red cheeks. It added a comical depth to Rafe's deep rolling laughter.
Grace's face burned. "I'm paying him back."
"I made some iced tea this morning. Who wants some?" Jeannie asked brightly. Grace shook her head.
"We're good, Mom. We've got to go. Rafe's taking me to dinner." Rafe took his cue and finished his beer, managing only a slight grimace before standing to leave.
"Hey, we're having a big barbecue party next month, y'all are welcome to come." Carl stood and extended his hand to Rafe.
"I would like that. Thanks." Rafe's smile was genuine, and he turned his gaze to Grace. "What do you say?"
She shrugged, looking at her mother, whose eyes were hopeful. "I guess that would be good. Call me with details, Mom." She hugged Jeannie and Carl and led the way out the door to her car.
Grace decided to go easy on Rafe for dinner and chose a quiet Italian bistro near Memorial Park on the way back home. Over lasagna and wine, they chatted about family.
"You know you're going to have to let it go, don't you?" His eyes twinkled over the rim of the wineglass.
She knew what he was talking about and didn't want to go there, just yet. "Why are you drinking? I ordered the bottle out of habit, but you don't drink."
He appeared thoughtful. "Well, I haven't drunk much, because I haven't used my body much. I gotta admit though, I like this better than the beer that Carl drinks."
"Well, go slow. I don't want you drunk."
He tittered at her, and it was such a strange sound coming out of his mouth, Grace smiled in spite of herself. "You're drunk already, aren't you?"
He flashed her a Cheshire grin. "Maybe."
She took another bite of the lasagna, using her tongue to lick the cheese off her chin, watching his eyes widen at the gesture. His fingers gripped his fork, whitening his knuckles. He seemed to recover himself though.
"Don't change the subject. You have to let it go." He gestured broadly with his hands. "This thing with Carl and your mom. They're adults, living their own mistakes. You can't dwell on them all the time, worried you'll do the same thing. You won't."
"I know." She sighed, and felt a small weight lift. "You're right. I was thinking the same thing earlier, with Mom. I'm not her. I won't repeat her mistakes." She took a thoughtful sip of wine, and Rafe eagerly refilled her glass. "Are you getting me drunk?"
His eyebrows rose innocently. "Me? No way. You've got to drive us home."
She laughed, and it felt really good. "There is a park right down the street. We can go for a walk or something to clear our heads after we eat."
His eyes softened, and his fingers reached for her hand, tracing the lines of her palm softly. "That would be nice." His touch sent tingles through out her body, and Grace shivered.
"How much…How often have you been inside my head? Since you've been here?"
"Only when I’ve been sleeping, since that time you were eating those chili cheese fries, which I want to try, by the way. They looked really good."
"Have you done that often? With other women?"
"Done what?" His comically innocent look sent her into giggles a
gain, and she slapped at his hand.
"You know what you did to me that day."
"Did you like it?"
Grace blushed. "No. You left me hanging!"
"I had to get your attention."
"You've had my attention, since the first time I saw you, Rafe." Grace suddenly felt shy talking to him. For the first time, his gaze made her feel something click inside and she was almost ready to admit what it was.
"I didn't want your attention, Grace." His green gaze seared her insides.
"I want to talk to you about that." She'd been meaning to talk to him about the sex thing. After last night, she realized he was playing with her. Probably not intentionally, but as a superhuman being, he really should know better. As much as Grace should have been pissed off about it, though, she wasn't.
Rafe's expression opened up, and he looked at her eagerly, completely clueless about what she was going to ask him.
"Why are you using sex as a tool?"
Surprise etched his features. "What?"
"You keep telling me you won't have sex with me until I tell you I love you, and then after what happened last night…It's like you're trying to get me to say the words, and you're teasing me mercilessly."
"I'm not trying to tease you…" His voice was soft, and apologetic. He ran his hands through his hair, as she crossed her arms in front of her. "I've been trying to find love for so long, it's hard to explain…"
"Try. Just for the sake of argument."
He looked her square in the eyes, and clutched her hands in his. His eyes had a drunken glaze to them, for which Grace was a little thankful. Maybe he would be honest with her, not that he hadn't been, but alcohol tended to erase any inhibitions.
"I've had sex before love, and it doesn't work like that, Grace. I love you, and I want it to be different with us. I want us to be forever. I'm too scared of screwing it up."