The lord lowered his head. “Your parameters. Use is preferable. Destruction, if use is impractical or impossible. I choose not to maintain a prisoner,” he said with a smile that held no comfort.
My throat tightened, and my mouth felt full of sand. As he’d promised, he made the decisions on how I was to live or how I was to die. “And what sort of use would you make of me?”
Mzatal looked upon me as though seeking to determine some unknown. “The destruction aspect is far simpler. Slay and then disperse the essence.” He paused. “Use depends upon what remains of you when I remove the stigma,” he said, eyes dropping to the mark.
I fought to control the cold panic that thrashed within me. “‘What remains’? What the fuck does that mean?”
The skin around his eyes tightened. “Hostile removal of a mark is extremely rare and the process extreme. Madness is a possibility. Removal of this construct of Rhyzkahl’s risks essence sheer,” he said, with a shake of his head and a touch of a frown. “Nothing of use to either of us would remain.”
I stared agape then recovered enough to speak. “Are you fucking kidding me? Then why…?” I shook my head in disbelief that anything could be this convoluted. “You’re going to try it anyway, aren’t you? You don’t give a fuck if I end up broken. It accomplishes the same thing. My destruction. You have nothing to lose by trying.”
“No, I do not,” he said as though my destruction meant nothing. “And much potential to gain. As do you. The risk is worth the consequences to both.”
I snorted a laugh at the absurdity. “Oh, sure. A little madness or fucked-up essence is a walk in the park for me and totally worth it for some magic tattoo removal.” Sweat trickled down my sides beneath the damn shift.
“Your ignorance in the matter does not change the potentials or the values.” He shifted his attention to Gestamar and spoke in demon. I caught the summoner’s name twice—Idris—but couldn’t get any other sense of what was said. Gestamar grunted and bounded out.
Mzatal drew a deep breath and released it slowly. “Kara Gillian,” he said in a potent melodic tone that drove straight through to my core. “You are a dangerous unknown. I prefer you to become a dangerous known with possibilities other than death.” He paused and regarded me with keen intensity. “But if deep assessment reveals full essence-binding by Rhyzkahl, then I will have no option but to slay you.”
I dragged my hand across my forehead. “Whew! And I thought today wasn’t going to be shittier than yesterday!”
“It is in truth a most fortunate day for you,” he said as he raked a gaze over me. “Wait here,” he ordered, then turned and exited, closing the doors with a flick of his fingers.
Silence descended, broken only by my unsteady breathing. Dispersal, essence sheer, madness. Right now the available options were all pretty fucking heinous. Even if I survived the removal fairly whole, I’d be nothing more than a slave. He’d stated quite clearly his desire to use me.
My fear settled into a weird acceptance. There was one other possible out. Mzatal had told me there was less chance of making it through the void a second time. Less chance. Not “no chance.” And why would he need to disperse my essence after slaying me if there truly was no chance? In other words, the available options are “shitty” and “shittier.”
I heard two demons conversing outside the door, and cold slammed through me again. Gestamar back from having Idris prepare some new, horrific ritual? No way was I just going to stand here twiddling my thumbs.
Oddly calm, my gaze swept the room, even though I knew damn well there was no convenient knife or noose. Only the damn statue, and broad thick windows covered in wards. I moved to the window near the statue and put my hand toward it. A tingle of pain shot through it, along with a surge of queasiness. But I’ve gone through wards before, I reminded myself grimly. I’m wearing the collar. It’ll suck, but dying for good or having my essence ripped apart will suck worse. What choice did I have?
None.
I couldn’t let myself think about it anymore. If I did I might lose my nerve and would probably never have another chance to take the plunge. Literally. My heart beat triple time, as if counting off my remaining seconds.
I set my shoulder against Elinor’s hip, dug my bare feet into the floor and pushed. She was a heavy bitch, but no match for my desperation. With a creak of stone, the statue slowly tipped, then toppled into the broad window with a satisfying crash, creating a sufficiently large hole.
Her head and shoulders protruded from the window into the open air. I clambered onto the statue, hissing as the first wards stung like a thousand bees. I pushed against them, feeling as if I was slogging through goo. A headache spiked as I forced my way forward. Only about a foot more and I could fall. Holy shit, it would suck, but staying here would suck worse. I dimly heard a bellow and the crash of the door being thrown open. Pain and nausea spiraled higher, and I gasped raggedly. I was on her shoulders now. Another inch and—
A different pain speared through my head as a clawed hand tangled in my hair. I let out a cry of pain and scrabbled to grab at the statue’s head. So damn close! Gestamar bellowed, pulling at me with a hard grip in my hair and on my thigh. Desperate, I tried to slash my forearm across a shard of glass. Oddly it didn’t break the skin any more than a piece of wood might, but the movement caused me to lose my grip on Elinor’s head. Pain from the wards seared through me again as the growling demon dragged me bodily back into the room and away from the window.
My knees buckled as the throbbing headache tripled in intensity, but Gestamar shifted his grip to my upper arms and kept me from completely collapsing. Maybe my head would explode and take care of the whole thing. That’d be convenient. Nausea rose, and I tasted bile. I’d almost made it through the wards. Another few seconds…
Mzatal entered and stopped before me. I dragged my gaze up to him, but the headache pounded so fiercely there seemed to be three of him. All three Mzatals lowered their heads and regarded me while Gestamar held me firmly before him. “Loss to wandering is a near certainty for death and a second passage through the void,” Mzatal told me, mouth pursing in a frown. “A poor choice. A poor option.”
Wandering. Like Tessa, I realized numbly. Not dispersed but lost in the void. Just as bad. Perhaps even worse.
I opened my mouth to tell him that he hadn’t presented any better options, but the nausea rose instead, and I spewed what little was in my gut onto the floor between us. Mzatal took a smooth half-step back to avoid the splatter, more of which ended up on me than him.
“The removal will take place in two days, after we return to my realm,” he told me, completely unperturbed, as if I hadn’t just tried to jump out of a window and then puked on the floor. “Until then, Safar is your guard and guardian.”
My head pounded as I shakily wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. Holy fuck, but I’d never hated anyone as much as I hated this fucking lord at this moment. Misery coiled in my empty stomach as if taunting me that it was there instead of food.
Mzatal regarded me. “It serves your purpose and mine for the unknown to become known, and Szerain’s realm holds many keys to unlocking your value. Do not waste the opportunity, Kara Gillian,” he said, tone rich and intense. His eyes remained on me for a moment more, then he turned and departed, hands behind his back.
Gestamar released me as another reyza entered, smaller and sharper in features than Gestamar. I swayed and rubbed at my temples, trying hard not to whimper as the two had a brief conversation in demon. I’d never had a migraine before, but I could only imagine this was what one was like.
Safar took hold of my arm in a careful grip, steadying me. “I am Safar, summoner.”
“I’m Kara Gillian,” I managed.
“Fair greetings, Kara Gillian,” he rumbled as he gently moved me toward the door. “Come.”
I didn’t resist and moved where he directed. A numbness descended on me as he led me through corridors, and my headache receded somewhat as we moved
further away from the room and broken window. It still hurt, but now it was more like bad-hangover than alien-about-to-burst-from-my-forehead. Even my nausea retreated. Now I was mostly starving.
“Gestamar is having a draught prepared for your headache,” the reyza told me as he maneuvered me through a debris-strewn hallway.
“Oh. Thanks,” I said. Not Mzatal. Gestamar. Maybe Mzatal didn’t give a fuck how miserable I was. Hell, there was no maybe about it.
My heel came down on a shard of glass as we walked but, to my surprise and relief, no slicing pain came with it. Remembering, I lifted my arm and peered at the long scratch from the window. It was an owie and little more.
“What is this stuff?” I said, nudging a piece with my big toe. “It’s not real glass, is it?”
Safar snorted. “It is very real, though not made like the glass of Earth. It is closer to a resin. Stronger, insulates against heat and cold more effectively, and does not cut like your glass.”
Without Gestamar breathing down my neck I could slow down enough to take in more of Szerain’s palace. I had to wonder how much of a hand he had in its actual creation since the whole thing was like a work of art, mostly curves and graceful arcs—even the doors—with sharp angles kept to a minimum. Portraits, paintings, and statues were ubiquitous—humans, demons, and some—well, I didn’t have a clue. Déjà vu integrated like an extra sense. At first it freaked me out; little things like knowing how many windows would be in the next room or which hallway might lead outside. It wasn’t always right, but enough for me to have no doubt Elinor had spent some time here.
Safar finally entered a chamber that wasn’t my cell. A big window draped in dust-free emerald silk dominated the far wall of a room about the size of my bedroom at home. In other words, not very big. A comfy looking chair of golden velvety stuff nestled by the window. A larger table and matching chair of heavy oak or similar wood dominated the center of the room. Déjà vu reigned supreme in here, and I knew without doubt that a bedchamber was beyond the closed door on the wall to the right.
Safar guided me into the chair at the table and then released me. I sat gratefully, rested my elbows on the table and rubbed at my head, grimacing. He stepped back into the corridor for a brief moment then returned with a mug that he placed before me. “From Gestamar,” he stated.
I took the mug and peered briefly at the contents. Couldn’t tell a damn thing about it except that it was liquid and it had a weird and tangy scent. Fuck it. It wasn’t as if this day could get any worse if the stuff turned out to be foul.
I slugged it down with only a slight grimace. It wasn’t vile, though I doubted I’d be asking for seconds.
“Your chambers are here,” Safar said as I placed the empty mug on the table. “Bed and bath there.” He gestured toward the door with a claw.
“My chambers?” I said. “You’re not taking me back to that other room?” My spirits dared to rise a few millimeters.
He crouched and shook his head. “Dahn.”
I peered at him. “How hard is it to learn y’all’s language?” I asked, pretty sure it was hard as hell given the gutturals, stops, and sounds that were just plain weird. Kri meant “yes” and dahn meant “no.” I’d picked that up from my dealings with demons through the years but not a lot else, since the demons I summoned all spoke or at least understood some English.
Safar spread his wings in a bone-popping stretch then settled them again. “Difficult for humans. Most who spend time here learn some words and phrases. Few become conversant. Only three have gained fluency.”
Most Who Spend Time Here. Well, let’s just hope I’m not here long enough to learn more than a few phrases. I grimaced and amended my mental statement. And not because some asshole lord decides to kill me because he thinks I’m a threat to his world.
“So, what do I do now?” I asked.
He peered at me. “Eat, bathe, rest, whatever you choose short of killing yourself or leaving the grounds.”
“Eat?” I asked as my stomach gave an accompanying growl. “Real food?”
He bared his teeth. “Kri…yes. It will be here soon.”
I eyed him dubiously. “Not that broth stuff, right? Real, solid food?”
Safar rumbled in what might have been amusement. “Real, solid food.”
My spirits rose a couple of inches this time. “Any chance I can get clothing? Underwear? Nifty shit like that?”
“In the bedchamber, awaiting.”
Now for the money question. I pursed my lips. “What about a toothbrush?”
“You will find the basics in either the bedchamber or the bath chamber.”
Hot damn. I pushed up from the table and headed for the bedroom, along the way realizing that my headache had vanished in the past couple of minutes.
Relief wound through me when I found my own clothing and shoes on the bed, obviously clean. I checked out the bath chamber next and stopped dead in my tracks, eyes fixed on the graceful gold-stone bath tastefully adorned with a pattern of leaves.
“You carved this for me?” I hear myself say, barely able to contain my delight.
Szerain sits on the edge of the tub, fingers idly tracing patterns of light on the surface of the water. He looks over at me, smiles. “Finished only yesterday. You will abide for some time to come. Rhyzkahl and I came to agreement.”
“And what of Giovanni?” I ask, barely daring to breathe or hope. He looks away, and my heart sinks. “My Lord?”
And there I was alone in the bath chamber staring at a tub already full of steaming water and no clue what happened to Giovanni. Like a fucking cliffhanger. Gah! I tried to get the image back but no luck.
Well, there was no doubt that Elinor had a thing for this Giovanni. How did all that turn out? I wondered. Elinor died. I knew that much. Murdered? Was that it? I couldn’t shake the utter certainty that there was something more to her death than simply being consumed in a gate. Not that there was anything simple about that, but still. And then the biggest mystery of them all: How had a slip of a girl with only adequate summoning skills come so close to destroying the world? There was a missing piece to all of this. I knew that. Even if no one else knew what had really happened, surely I could figure it out, right? After all, I had the best eyewitness camped out in my head.
And then there was Szerain. I took a step forward and touched the carvings on the lip of the bath where the memory-vision had been. He didn’t look anything like Ryan in the face, but his build, green gold eyes and hair were right. Well, Szerain’s hair was longer than Ryan’s FBI-regulation cut, but the color and texture were a match. What else about him was different? Elinor hadn’t been afraid of him. That was some consolation at least.
Every answer seemed to raise two more questions. I gave a mental shrug and dipped my hand in the water. Plush towels, basic toiletry items—including the much-desired toothbrush—and a full hot bath. Looked like just what I needed. Yeah, a nice long soak could make up for a lot.
I stuck my head out of the bedchamber. “I’m going to bathe, okay?”
Safar snorted and crouched, which I took for acknowledgment.
I returned to the bath, stripped quickly, and sank to my neck in the water. For a moment I wondered who the hell filled the damn thing since there was nothing resembling a faucet, but then decided I really didn’t care. It was completely awesome. Would’ve been better if I didn’t have a death-or-madness sentence coming up in two days, but what the hell. All the more reason to enjoy the shit while I could.
Chapter 4
After about twenty minutes I felt more human and more certain that I was well clean of any lingering Tracy-bits and my own puke-spatter. I dried and dressed but paused before returning to the main room, taking this chance to peer at the damn collar in the mirror. No seam that I could feel or see. My gaze swept the bathroom and finally rested on the edge of the stone table that held the basin. Crouching awkwardly, I scraped the edge of the collar against the table about half a dozen times then peered at it
in the mirror.
Shit. The edge of the table had a long gouge on it, but the stupid collar was as pristine and whole as ever. Not even the slightest mar or scratch. What the hell was this stuff?
Sighing in annoyance and disappointment, I returned to the main room just as a pair of faas burst in, one carrying a mug and the other a tray of what I sure hoped was food.
“For you. For youuuuu!” one burbled as they placed tray and mug on the table. With a body about three feet long, a sinuous tail about twice that, and six legs, the faas reminded me of a sleek blue-furred lizard. It peered at me with near comic curiosity, its vertically-slitted bright golden eyes round and shining over a broad snout. Its tail coiled and undulated ceaselessly, and the demon itself vibrated all over as though it could barely contain itself. I’d summoned faas on several occasions to do arcane warding in my house, and I didn’t think I’d ever seen one be still. “Jekki! Jekki! I am,” it said, vibrating yet more, purple iridescence shimmering over its fur.
I smiled. Couldn’t help it. Faas had that effect on me. “Kara Gillian. I’m honored to meet you, Jekki.”
The second faas raised up so that it supported itself on the back four legs and had free use of the front two as hands. It traced a quick blue sigil in the air and coalesced it into what looked like a little azure gem which it promptly tossed to Jekki. “Faruk. I am Faruk. Kara Gill Ian,” it said, holding its fisted right hand out as though waiting for a fist bump. “Faas of Mzatal say greet to Kara.”
I found myself grinning despite the trauma of the past couple of days. I had no idea what the protocol was for this, so I just went with what I knew and gave the faas a fist bump. “Right back atcha, Faruk. Greetings and all that,” I said, hoping I hadn’t made a social blunder like eating with the wrong fork. Apparently it was okay, because Faruk bared its teeth in a smile and held its hand out toward Jekki, who returned not only the blue gem but two red ones it dug out of a belt pouch. “Eaaaaaaat! Drinnnnnnnnk!” Faruk said, and then both darted out without another word.
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