by Dale Mayer
“How do you separate the two?” he asked. He didn’t know if he was delaying the stretches coming up—as the new muscles had to be gently teased into cooperating, when they didn’t have any intention of doing so. It was like they tacked cement on or a steel bar from each muscle point to the insertion point.
“Partly it’s my job,” Shane said. “Partly it’s experience. And partly I don’t separate them. I draw from one experience to the other. The same as you need to draw from your old experience to now.”
“I thought it’d be easier if I forgot all that beforehand.”
“Sure,” he said. “I want you to forget about the ten years in the navy before your accident, but I want you to remember way back to childhood, when you were still learning to do things. Where you had to learn to walk. Where you had to learn to bend over and touch your toes, and when you couldn’t do it. All because the back of your legs weren’t limber enough and your back didn’t bend enough. And how it felt to actually stretch out all those muscles and get there.”
“The thought of touching my toes …” He shook his head. “That seems a long way away.”
“It’s not,” Shane said. “Let’s get started.”
Chapter 7
When Robin woke up Saturday morning, she laid in bed, tired and worn out. She’d been up to help Stan in the night, the two of them unavoidably coming in to check on a patient they were each worried about, only to find that both the dog and the cat weren’t doing well. They’d stayed for a couple hours, until they were sure that their patients were improving. And then, they both crashed again.
Now she was lying in her bed on a Saturday, staring out and groaning. Stan would work a half day but another vet tech, one who came in to help when they got too busy, was here so that Robin had the full weekend off. But having the full weekend off when you lived beside the vet clinic didn’t really mean you were off-off.
She often went in and checked on the animals kept there. Hoppers always needed to come outside; the horses and the llama needed grain and to be fed. And, even though that wasn’t her job, she couldn’t help feeling like maybe she should check outside to make sure it was being done.
As she sat up in bed and swung her legs to the floor, she groaned again. “If this is how I feel after a bad night, I can’t imagine how Iain or the others feel.” She stepped into a hot shower and realized that was a big problem, almost an impasse between them.
It’s not that she couldn’t understand, but it was outside her experience to fully comprehend. And she had to let him have the full experience of what he was going through and also honor that, without criticizing or in any way making it look like she could understand—because how could she? She could empathize and be grateful that she wasn’t experiencing what he was, but absolutely she had no way to contemplate his situation to the same level which he was going through, day after day after day.
She’d been physically healthy all her life. She had worked with animals in difficulties and with major problems, but she couldn’t do a whole lot to help any animal or any person without being an empathetic person. Yet that wasn’t the same thing as being somebody who could say that she fully understood, had her own experience going through something the same, and could truly sympathize. Sympathy was fine and good, yes, in some situations, but that was the last thing she wanted to give Iain.
As she checked her watch after her shower, she realized she’d already missed the breakfast hour. But then that was okay because the last thing she wanted was food. What she really wanted was to go for a long walk out in the sunshine. She quickly braided her hair into a plait down her back, put on shorts, a decent walking shoe, and a T-shirt. Then she grabbed her phone and headed out to the animals. She had a bottle of water with her, and she’d do coffee and food when she got back.
She started off at the pasture with the animals, giving greetings and handfuls of grain to the horses and to the lovely llama that had joined them. Even the little filly was doing so much better, and she was definitely not the little-filly size that she had been before. She was growing every day. Her temperament was beautiful too, and she had an absolutely lovely blond mane.
Robin stood a moment, brushing the animals gently, just enjoying being with them. Finally saying goodbye, she headed off down the pasture where several acres of open land were. It could be more than that; she had no idea what an acre looked like down on the ground, and she wasn’t sure what property belonged to the Hathaway House. She knew Dani did a lot of riding, in the mornings especially, and seemed to stay on the property and yet kept going for hours, so Robin didn’t exactly know what property lines there were.
This morning she was just looking for something like an hour’s walk. As she walked along the pastures and came up on the far side of a fence and walked all the way around, back to where she had started, she realized that that had already taken her the better part of an hour. She came up to the front parking lot and then walked to the veterinarian parking lot and went back to her own apartment.
Stepping inside, she thought about putting on coffee and then decided that maybe she’d go to the cafeteria and grab one instead. Inside, she was hoping that maybe her path would cross with Iain. Something was so very wonderful about him. She’d met a lot of the other men here, but they didn’t have the same effect on her that Iain did. Maybe that was good. He was definitely the most interesting male she’d met in a long time.
As she walked inside, the cafeteria was empty, and all the trays clean and shiny, waiting for the lunch rush. She walked over to the coffee service, poured herself a cup, plus snagged a bottle of juice, then headed out to the deck. As she sat down, a voice hailed her. She turned to see Shane. She gave him a smile. “How are you doing?”
“I’m doing great,” he said. “How are you settling in? It’s been a couple months now, hasn’t it?”
“Almost, yeah,” she said. “And you?”
“Years and years and years,” he said with a big laugh.
“Well, it seems like you’re getting the job done,” she said.
“How do you figure?” he asked with a questioning look in his eye.
“This place is such a success, and you are a huge part of that.” She smiled. “A certain comfort is in that though,” she said. She lifted her cup, blew at the hot brew, and added, “Not the least of which is you’ve had so many years of Dennis’s cooking.”
“I have, indeed,” Shane said, patting his belly. “And eight years of trying to combat the extra waistline.”
She burst out laughing. “I think that’s a common complaint here.”
He grinned. “So, how are you and Iain doing?”
She slowly lowered her cup and leaned forward. “Does everybody think something’s going on between us?”
“Well, I personally notice things like that,” he said. “And I know that Iain is often searching anytime he’s out in the public spaces, as if looking to catch sight of someone.”
“Might not be me,” she warned.
“Might not be,” Shane said cheerfully, “but I bet it is.”
She could feel some heat flush her cheeks. She shrugged self-consciously and said, “Well, I must admit I hope he’s looking for me,” she said. “He’s an interesting man.”
“He is. He is also struggling in some ways.”
“Why is that?”
“I don’t think he thought it would be as hard as it is.”
“I think he figured he had done as much improvement as he could,” she said. “This was kind of a last-ditch effort to go beyond what the surgeons had said. And then, when nothing happened in the first two to three weeks here, it’s like he gave up. He was getting ready to walk away, giving up his bed for someone else who really needed it. With that thought, he had to start thinking about having a different life.”
“I heard something like that from him,” Shane said. “Only it’s not that cut-and-dry. And he’s a long way away from seeing his optimum self yet. And that’s good.”
“
I’m glad to hear that,” she said seriously. “We do a lot of very deep talking,” she said with a half smile. “It’s interesting getting to know who he is on the inside.”
“It’s one of the reasons I love my job,” Shane said, “because the real person only shows up when trouble moves into their lives.”
She thought about that for a long moment, then sat back and realized he was right. “You must have seen some incredible people throughout your years here.”
“I have, indeed,” he said. “It’s been a joy and an honor to help these people.”
“Do you have any concerns about Iain?”
He shook his head. “Not really,” he said. “I think, as long as he’s striving and still driving for something better than what he has, he’ll be fine. We’ll end up in trouble only if he gives up.”
She frowned at that. “And is there any reason he would give up?”
“He’ll come to a point in time where his body can’t be improved anymore,” Shane said. “When the muscles are as strong as they’ll get, without expending more time and effort into building them up. Meaning, more energy than he has available.”
She had to work her way through that convoluted explanation and then understood. “So, really there’s a point where he’ll max out his potential. Even here.”
“Yes. To know if he’s happy with where he’s at then is hard to say.”
“I know he really wants to get a prosthetic on that leg so the one that had all the surgery is strong enough to support him.”
“And that may or may not come to pass,” Shane said. “I know he’ll try it no matter what we say, but that doesn’t mean he’ll like the end result.”
“Right,” she said. “And I guess that makes sense, even though it’s sad to hear.”
“It doesn’t have to be sad,” he said. “The thing to remember is that life is all about finding where you’re at and going forward with what you have. There’s a certain comfort in having hard rules to follow.”
“If you say so,” she said. “It seems very odd though.”
“No,” he said. “It’s a good thing.”
“Maybe.” But she seemed doubtful at first. “I know what he really wants is to walk on his own two feet.”
“We’ll do our best to get him there,” Shane said. “But it’s not just about building up. It’s also about letting go. It’s releasing the stiffness from the muscles as well as the stiffness from his needs and wants. As much as this is a physical process, it’s a mental one as well. That can be the hardest part.” And, with that, he got up and walked away.
She sat here for a long moment, thinking about their conversation. She had never really considered that psychological part of the equation, but it matched up to what she could see in other people around her. Even with her brother Keith. Only she hadn’t really put two and two together. Because she dealt with animals, she didn’t have to explain what was going on to the animal itself. She couldn’t ask the animal to stretch and to do what it needed to do. They almost instinctively did it anyway.
She had seen some horrific injuries where, when she saw the animal next, they were completely comfortable with that. And, in some cases, they’d healed better than before. The human body was just as marvelous, but the human mind had the ability to stop or to start the healing process. She wondered if Iain understood that too.
When another voice called to her from the doorway, she shifted to see Iain standing there on crutches, a surprised look on his face.
She got up and walked her empty coffee cup to the sideboard for dirty dishes, then headed toward Iain. “Hey,” she said. “How are you doing? I expected you to sleep all weekend.”
“No,” he said. “Not something I was intentionally trying to do. I felt like it, but I haven’t even eaten yet.” He glanced at Dennis, who was wandering around in the back. “But it looks like we still have an hour until lunch.”
She nodded. “Do you need food though? Because I’m sure Dennis can get you something.”
Iain laughed. “No, that’s fine,” he said. “I was just stretching out by walking up and down the hallway a bit. My shoulders are still pretty stiff.”
“You can go for a swim in the pool,” she suggested.
He studied her in surprise, then said, “Join me?”
She frowned, then nodded. “Sure. Why not?” she said. “It’s a beautiful day out, and we still have at least an hour until we can eat.”
“Did you not eat?”
She smiled, shook her head, and said, “No, I didn’t. I went for a walk instead.”
“Good,” he said. “I’ll meet you down at the pool in ten?”
She nodded and said, “Ten it is.”
And they split at the doorway. She headed back to her apartment and quickly changed. She grabbed a cover-up and then a big towel and headed up to the pool deck. Self-conscious but grateful she was here first, she tossed off her towel and her cover-up, and dove in with a nice, clean breaking motion into the water. And as soon as she broke the surface, she kicked out strongly and did several laps.
When she slowed down, she noted somebody in the pool stroked out strongly beside her. She smiled and made one more lap with him, then waited at the pool steps for him. And finally Iain stopped his laps, looked at her, and said, “You’re right. This was a good idea.”
“It’s a great way to loosen up muscles,” she said. “And I find it helps me to loosen up my thoughts.”
That startled a laugh out of him. “Interesting way to look at life again,” he said. “I really like that about you.”
She smiled and said, “I like that about you too.”
Iain hadn’t really expected her to come to the pool with him, yet having her here beside him felt natural. Water was his element, where he didn’t need both legs to stand; and he was as much a fish as any good swimmer was, so he could hold his own. He dove into the water, then came up several times, just loving the feeling of being free. “My muscles do feel a lot better.”
“Good,” she said. “I’ll do a few more laps, so I can work up a bit of an appetite.”
“I highly doubt that’s an issue,” he said. “Especially if you haven’t even eaten anything and already did a long walk.”
“No, maybe not,” she said, “but I don’t get enough exercise as it is. Plus I find that I get fairly stressed in my job too, since I worry about all the animals that come through the clinic. So this is a great way to unwind.”
“Well, it’s not that I need to unwind,” he said, “but I do need to stretch.”
“How are you finding Shane to work with?”
Iain looked surprised at her question, then glanced around to see if anybody was close enough to hear them. “I think he knows his stuff,” he said. “I’m not sure I always understand his instructions though.”
“I hear you on that,” she said, “particularly if it’s cryptic.”
“It’s often cryptic with him. Some of the instructions are dead straight with their wording. Lift your arm, lift this way, move this direction,” he said with a laugh, “but a lot of it isn’t clear from Shane. A lot of it is much harder to sort out.”
“You can always ask him for added clarity.”
“I could,” he said. “But sometimes it’s almost like the confusion or the lack of clarity is part of the challenge, and I’m supposed to figure it out myself. As if, by figuring it out, I’ll gain an extra reward in there for having done so.” He shook his head. “Listen to me,” he said. “I’m daft.”
At that, she burst out laughing. “I’ll race you.” Without giving him a chance to respond, she started toward the far side.
He immediately dove in after her, his right arm and his left arm finding that same steady rhythm that he used to be so good at. And, by focusing on keeping his hips level and flat, he plowed right ahead of her. When she finally got to the far side, he was already there, waiting.
She laughed. “You might not be able to walk fast,” she said, “but you swim like a
dolphin.”
“I do,” he said. “It was one of the reasons I was absolutely ecstatic to find out a pool was here.”
“Have you recommended this place to any of your friends yet?” She stroked out slowly, heading to the shallow end with the steps.
He looked at her in surprise and then slowly shook his head, following after her. “You know what? I haven’t. But I should.”
“If you think it’s helping you, then you should,” she said. She nodded to the far wall. “I’ll do another lap.” But this time, she laid on her back and just floated her way to the far end.
He floated gently beside her. “I didn’t even think about it,” he said. “I met a couple guys at the other hospital. They were kind of stuck, figured that this was their life.”
“Kind of like you, huh?”
He looked at her in surprise, then nodded slowly. “Yeah, exactly like me. They had the same mind-set.”
“Makes you wonder if you didn’t have that mind-set because everybody around you also had that mind-set. And the same for them. If they don’t know that there’s another way to look at life and if they don’t see any progress, then maybe they won’t know to expect that either.”
“Huh,” he said. “I may have to say something to them.”
“And a place like this always is interested in helping as many people as they can,” she said. “I don’t even know that they have any beds available as my own brother is on the waiting list, but if your friends need a place … get them on too.”
“Well, I definitely think a couple guys might benefit from being here,” he said. “Jaden is one. Lance is another.”
“Tell me about them?” They had reached the far wall to the pool again, and they both hung on, kicking with their feet to stay afloat.
“They were teammates in a mission that went bad. A roadside bomb hit them. Jaden got badly hurt, his right leg damaged, then burned, and their vehicle overturned and landed on his right shoulder. His thigh bone took a lot of shrapnel, so he has more steel pins in that leg than bones. So he’s got a leg, but it’s pretty useless,” he said. He gave a clipped nod. “Shane might very well do something about that.”