by River Savage
Fuck!
“Do we have an ETA on the wife?” I ask Walker, watching as Team Two inches closer.
“She's a few minutes out.”
Knowing I don’t have much time, I pick up the phone and call Norman back.
“Is Sharon there?” he answers on the second ring.
“She's two minutes out. But I need you to know we’re not going to be able to let her on the bridge, Norman.”
“I don't need her on the bridge. I just want her to see.” He ends the call short, throwing the cell out the window.
Fuck. This is going to escalate fast.
“Okay, guys, we lost communication. We need to move this along,” I order as the front driver door opens and Norman exits the car. With Lucy held close to his chest, he makes a run for the side of the bridge.
Both teams step out from their positions, forming a basic formation they slowly inch forward.
“STAY BACK!” Norman screams, reaching into his jeans and pulling out a gun.
Fuck. He’s going to jump.
Acting on instinct, I step out of command, crossing over the perimeter and run toward him.
“You all need to stay back.” Norman spins when he makes it to the ledge, his left arm holding Lucy close to his chest.
“Drop the weapon, now.”
“Do it now.”
“Drop it.” A barrage of demands and shouts fill the air as both teams close in, guns drawn, as Norman draws his pistol up to Lucy’s temple.
“Norman, you don’t want to do this.” I push past Hart and Fox, hands raised in front of me. Lucy is screaming as she tries to claw her way out of his hold.
“Boss, you need a shield,” I hear Hart call out, but I keep my focus on Norman.
“Is she here? Can she see?” He frantically looks around, stepping back further toward the edge of the bridge.
“Let Lucy go and we can let you talk to her, Norman.” I inch closer. I don’t believe he wants to harm his daughter. He’s hurting, and sometimes desperate people go to extremes for something they love.
“I have the shot.” Tate’s controlled voice comes through on my earpiece.
I weigh up our options here. He's close to the ledge with Lucy held tight to his chest. If Tate takes the shot, we risk him falling back with Lucy.
“Norman, take a step away from the edge for me.” I risk another step closer to him.
“Stay back. I’ll throw her!” he yells, forcing another petrified scream from Lucy. I risk a quick look, regretting it instantly. Wild eyes, pupils dilated, her fear speaks to me in its cackling voice, telling me I’m not going to save them while taunting me with the idea I might.
I wish I could reach out and yank her from him, but it doesn’t work like that. I need to keep calm and in control.
“You won’t. I know you love her, Norman.” I force another step. “You would do anything for her.” Norman nods, his crazed stare slipping into realization.
“I just want to be with my kids.”
“Look at me, Norman.” I take a final step. “Give me the gun.”
“Why did she have to lie? I just want to be the best dad.” His voice drops to a whisper.
“Norman, give me Lucy.” He takes another step away from my voice, just as I see Sterling give me a hand signal in my peripheral vision.
I signal back, letting him know I’m reading him.
On his count of one, he takes a step to his left. On two, I take a step to the right. By three, we both lunge.
I grab for Lucy—Sterling for the gun. It becomes a tangle of arms and legs, and in a quick flurry of movements, I manage to rip Lucy from his arms as Norman dives over the edge.
“Daddyyyyy!” She tries to fight my hold, reaching for her father. I tuck her head into my chest, obscuring her view, and start moving her away.
She clings to me like a lifeline. Her small body is shaking harder than my composure.
“I’ve got you. It’s okay.” I try to soothe her, but as hard as I want to believe it to be true, I know it’s not.
The fear in her scream tears at me, taking me back to the moment I lost my father.
The moment he gave up.
And in that second, I know no amount of time will ever make this okay.
She will never be okay. Never forget this moment, and never forget the pain.
No amount of okays will take it away. It will be forever ingrained in her soul, like a piece of her.
Just like it is with me.
Twenty-Four
Liberty
“Oh, my God, your face when you walked up those stairs. I thought you were going to punch me.” Kota laughs as she drives me home later that day.
We finished lunch hours ago, but between her and her mom wanting to know everything about me, the hours flew by and before we knew it, it was edging closer to dinnertime.
“No way. Now Hetch on the other hand….” I trail off and Kota laughs, probably thinking I’m joking. I’m not. Before I found out he was hugging his sister, I could have easily punched his junk.
“Why do you call him, Hetch? Did he tell you to call him that?” She continues with her questioning.
“I don’t know. I guess when we first met, he introduced himself as Hetch, and it stuck. I notice you and your mom only call him Liam.”
“Yeah, Mom hates it, especially since Dad died. It’s what his friends called him too.” The air in the car stiffens, not in the same way it may have if Hetch had told the same story, but in a way which tells me their loss is still very fresh.
“Do you mind me asking how your dad died, Kota?” I whisper, hoping to get some kind of insight into what Hetch is dealing with.
“Liam hasn’t told you?” Her head whips around briefly to get a read on me.
“No, he told me he passed away. But since then every time it comes up, he kind of shuts down.” I tell her the truth. Whatever happened to Hetch’s father has defined the type of man he is. I just want an understanding of the matter.
“Umm, well, I don’t know. I mean, I don’t have a problem talking about it. It’s just Liam might not be okay with it.”
“Oh, okay. Of course it’s fine.” I push down my disappointment.
“I wish I could tell you, Liberty. But I think it’s probably better coming from him,” she offers, only confusing me more. What does Hetch have to do with it?
“I shouldn’t have asked, I ju—” My words get cut off by the ringtone of Kota’s phone through the car speakers.
“Sterling.” Her smile grows as she accepts the call, as if him calling is the highlight of her day.
Okay, something is definitely going on there.
“Hello?”
“Hey. Where you at right now?” he replies, less excited to speak to her than Kota seems to be by receiving his call.
“Driving back to town. Why, what’s up?” Her tone loses its spark. It’s only subtle, but I pick it up instantly.
“You see the news?”
“No why?”
“Good,” is all he says.
“What’s going on, Sterling. Is Liam okay?” My heart clenches at his name. It takes a second before Sterling answers before I can take a breath.
“We’re at The Elephant. We had a bad call. Surprised you didn’t see the news.”
“Shit,” she curses. Obviously clicking on to something I’m not getting. “How bad?”
“Lost the dad.”
“Shit. How is he?”
“What do you think, Dakota?” The way her name is delivered in a smooth, smoky tone makes my senses come alive.
Holy shit, there is something seriously going on with these two!
“Don’t be an ass, Sterling. I’m coming now. I have Liberty with me. Maybe she can talk him down.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Well it can’t hurt, can it?”
“Fine. Just hurry.” He cuts the call without a good-bye.
“What’s going on, Kota?” I ask, hoping like hell Hetch
is okay, and Kota reveals something. Anything.
“Okay, so maybe I should tell you how our father died. If things are as serious with my brother as I think they may be, you need to know what you’re dealing with.” Her confession sets my nerves on fire.
What the fuck is going on?
And why do I get the feeling what she’s about to tell me will change everything?
“Oh, Shit.” Kota pulls into The Elephant parking lot ten minutes later to find a very drunk Hetch taking a swing at Sterling. On the drive over, Kota filled me in on everything regarding Hetch and what their family has been living with the last few years.
To say I was shocked wouldn’t be a stretch. From the last few weeks of spending time with him, I knew there was something he was dealing with. What, I wasn’t sure. Never in a million years would I have guessed it was witnessing, and not being able to stop, his father’s suicide.
“Stop!” I call out as Sterling’s fist connects with his face, knocking him down on his ass.
“Sterling, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Kota rushes forward with me, but instead of kneeling down to check on her brother, she gets up in Sterling’s face.
“Stay out of this, Dakota.”
“Like hell, Sterling.”
“Hetch?” I ignore their bickering and reach for him. “Are you okay?” He looks up at my voice, the haze clearing in his blank stare.
“What the hell are you doing here?” He finally notices me.
“What the hell is going on?” I answer with my own question.
“You shouldn’t be here.” He starts to stand, a little wonky on his feet.
“Well, clearly I should be. Look at you. You’re a mess.” I reach for his hand to help him stay steady.
“I didn’t ask you to come, Liberty.” He pulls back like my touch burns him. “You need to go.”
“Not without you I won’t be.”
“Kota, get her the fuck out of here.”
“Liam, you’re drunk. Don’t be an ass.” Kota gives up her argument with Sterling and joins ours.
“Why would you call her, Sterling?” He turns and narrows his eyes on his best friend.
“I don’t know, ‘cause you were talking shit for the last hour.”
“What sort of shit?” Kota presses.
“Will you all just fuck off and leave me alone.” He turns and starts walking in the direction of home.
“What sort of shit, Sterling?” Kota presses while I jog to catch up with Hetch.
“Hetch! Will you talk to me? Tell me what’s happening here?” I don’t recognize this man. He’s normally so self-assured, has it together, and yet tonight he’s someone else.
“I don't think I can see you anymore, Liberty.” His words slap the air, and even though he is drunk, and probably doesn’t know what he’s talking about, it still stings.
“What?” My pace slows as I try to get my head around the change of events.
This morning we were heading out for a drive, I met his mom, spent the day with her and Kota, and by the evening, we are over?
“You heard me.”
“I did, but I was hoping the second time you said it you would realize you’re full of shit.” I catch up, my earlier shock morphing into anger.
“I’m full of shit?” he mocks, and I know I shouldn’t engage him, shouldn’t be discussing it in his state, but he’s baiting me.
“You know you are.”
“How so, Liberty?” The way he speaks my name makes me feel unsettled, like he’s distancing himself from me and the easiest way to do it, is to act cold and heartless.
“I'm getting too close, aren’t I? Getting under your skin?” I know I hit the nail dead on when he physically recoils.
“That has nothing to do with it.” Does he think I’m stupid?
“No? Then tell me what it is?” My voice rises and I catch Sterling and Kota’s presence in my peripheral vision.
“I don't do relationships. I don’t take women out to my house, and I sure as hell don’t do lunch with my mom and sister. You brought all this on.”
“Liam—” Kota starts to talk, but I don’t want her involved.
“And it scares you?”
“No, I just don’t want this. I don’t want any of this shit. I was happy before you came along.”
“No, you don’t want it because you’re scared. Admit it. You’re running scared right now.”
“No, it’s because I don’t love you,” he corrects, and my body flinches at the rejection. “I don’t need to be dragged down with your bullshit drama. I don’t need the stress of having to worry about you. About the boys. I’m done. I’m so fucking done.”
“That’s enough, Liam.” Kota steps in front of me, blocking me from his line of sight, but it’s too late. He’s already hit his mark.
He’s trying to hurt you, Liberty.
Maybe he doesn’t love me the way I thought he did, but he still cares. He’s just too lost in his head right now.
“No, it’s fine, Kota.” I step around her and take three steps toward him. “You know what you are, Liam Hetcherson?” His nostrils flare when I spit his name at him. “You’re so lost you can’t see what’s in front of you. You think a night out on the booze fixes everything? Makes it all go away? You’re only hurting yourself here.” I turn and start to walk back to Kota’s car. There’s no getting through to him tonight. The best thing for all of us, especially me, is to walk away.
“You don't know what you're talking about, Liberty!” he shouts, only because I hit a soft spot.
“Right, I wouldn’t have a clue, ’cause I'm just some platinum pussy who has no idea what you could be dealing with right now? I couldn't possibly know what I'm talking about.” I spin back, using the words he used this morning.
“How could you? You weren't there. None of you fucking were. So why the fuck do you get to judge me?” His voice starts to rise, and I wonder if this is going to be it for him.
Rock bottom.
“No one is judging you, Hetch.” I keep my voice low and calm as I risk a step back to him. “I wasn’t there, but it doesn’t take a trained professional to know you need help, Liam. You need to talk about it with someone.”
“YOU DON’T GET TO TELL ME WHAT I NEED!” I recoil from his scream, feeling ridiculous for it. Hetch may want to hurt me with his words, but I know he would never physically hurt me.
“Enough, Hetch.” Sterling steps in front of him, his voice carrying a warning with enough menace to scare me. “Liberty’s right. You need to talk to someone. If you don’t, I’m gonna report your ass.” His finger pokes his chest, pushing his opinion literally into him.
“Fuck you, Sterling.”
“No, fuck you. I love you, man. I do. But this shit has to end. You have a family who cares about you. A woman who’s holding on, even though you stand here pushing her away, and friends who would do anything for you. What more do you fucking want?”
“You know what, I don’t want anything from any of you. I’m done. Kota,”—he points to his sister—“I’ll see you later. Sterling,”—he flips his middle finger toward him—“fuck you very much, and Liberty,”—he steps up into my space, reaching for me. He holds my face so gently I can feel my heart skip a beat—“I’m only gonna hurt you.” He kisses me once. “It’s for the best.” He kisses me twice. “Don’t make it harder on me.” Then a third before he steps back and drops his hands.
“You don’t have to hurt me.” My voice is small, weighed down with pain.
“Damn it, I already am!” His shoulders slump forward, his hand rubbing through the mess of his hair like he’s trying to rein in his emotions.
“Hetch.” I reach for him, only for him to brush me off.
“Kota, make sure she gets home.” He turns without another word and starts walking away from us. I want to call out to him. Want to tell him he’s not hurting me, but it would be a lie.
He is hurting me. He’s hurting us.
And I'm not sure if we ca
n come back from it.
“I’ll make sure he finds his way back home. Kota, make sure you get her back too,” Sterling orders before taking off to find him.
“Come on, babe, let’s get you home.” Kota reaches for my hand, but I pull away.
“Maybe I should follow too.” I look over at her, despising the pity I see in her eyes.
“I think you should let him be, give him some time. He’ll come back to you. I know he will.”
I want to believe her, believe that he will find his way back to me, but I'm not so sure.
I'm not sure about anything anymore.
“Sweetheart, open the door.” Hetch finds his way back to me four hours and seventeen minutes later. My eyes open from my broken sleep, adjusting to my dark living room before slowly sitting up.
“Liberty.” He knocks harder while I try to force my racing heart down. I’ve been sitting here since Kota dropped me home, wondering where he was and when he was getting back. Praying he would come to me. But now he’s here, I’m not sure I’m ready to see him. I’m not ready to see this other person who’s a stranger to me. A broken man. A heartless man. A man who doesn’t care who he hurts.
“Please open the door, Liberty. I need you.” The desperation in his voice calls to me and all concern and worries I may have been feeling are left behind as I move to the door.
“Hey.” I open up, keeping my body inside the doorframe and my hand on the door.
“Baby, you opened.” He looks shocked; his bloodshot eyes tell me he either continued drinking wherever he walked off to, or he’s been crying.
My guess, both.
“Don’t make me regret it.” I open the door wider to let him pass.
“Sweetheart, I—” He reaches for me, but I step out of his way.
I’m not sure I’m ready for him to touch me.
“Please don’t.” I close the door and move back over to the sofa. I didn’t let him in so we could fuck. We need to talk. We need to be real.
Following my lead, Hetch walks around and takes a seat next to me.
Not too close.
Not close enough.
“I don’t know where to start.” He looks so defeated, so rejected. A little less self-assured. A little less cocky.