One Moment

by Elizabeth Savino

  I believe him, I do.

  Quietly I tell another part of my story, “Steve was an ex. Thought he cared about me. My Dad had just died, I was looking for a safe harbor. He wasn’t it. I learned that the hard way. He hit me. He hurt me. Physically and mentally. But that’s in the past. I haven’t seen him in years. And if I never see again that would be great.”

  “Last name.”

  “Um, what?”

  “You owe me two last names now. One, your ex. And two your sister’s ex.”

  “I don’t see how that’s necessary Logan.”

  “You don’t see how that’s necessary? Your asshole of an ex beat you. You still flinch because of his actions. And I want to make sure your sisters ex doesn’t have a reason to try to be ‘creepy’ around you.”

  “Fine. Steven Barletta. And my sisters ex is John Moreti.” I figure why not. There are probably five thousand Steven Barletta’s and ten thousand John Moreti’s in New York.

  “Thanks honey.” Logan says softly and kisses my forehead.

  “Um, Logan” I say hesitantly.

  “Yeah babe?”

  “Um….”

  “Honey, don’t ever and I mean ever be afraid of me. Ask me what you want.” With that he squeezes my arms.

  “What about you?” I ask shyly looking down to his pants.

  “I’ll live. I’m not keeping count darlin’’.” Logan say’s smiling at me.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Laura’s Man

  We walk hand in hand up to the ranch. It feels natural, right. The reality of the situation is it feels good, too good. I don’t ever want to pull my hand away. Not ever.

  So I do. Logan chuckles. It’s like he knows I’m internally fighting a losing battle. I need to make sure I protect my heart and not fall further for Logan. Which I think, no I know, would be really easy to do. He’s a good man. A good father. A good friend. If I’m being honest with myself I have already fallen for him, hard. But I’ll keep lying to myself that I haven’t yet.

  When we make it up to the ranch I’m introduced to a few of the men that work for Logan. How he can keep all of this running smoothly and raise a child, while still helping occasionally on special cases as a detective, I haven’t a clue. I stress when a piece I am working on isn’t turning out the way I hoped it would.

  I turn to look up at Logan, God he’s beautiful. He’s staring back at me. “What are you thinking honey, I can see your mind racing behind those gorgeous eyes.”

  He thinks my eyes are gorgeous!

  I feel the blood rush to my cheeks, causing them to burn. Can I blame it on the heat? Absolutely, but detective Logan would see right through it. So I just turn my head to look away while asking, “I was just wondering where Magic was. Not that I want to get on her, just doesn’t she need to be brought back?”

  “No, she knows to come back here. Look over there,” Logan points to one of his men. He has Magic by the reins and is walking her back to the barn.

  “Oh, that’s pretty cool.” And it is.

  “Yeah, cool.” Logan say’s teasing me.

  “Laura, Laura…………….” I hear being yelled for me.

  Cody. He is running full force towards us. He doesn’t look like he’s going to stop, and he’s not heading towards Logan, he’s heading towards me. Just when I would have been struck by the incoming speed of a six year old impact Logan intercepts and swoops Cody up.

  “Hey buddy. You can’t run full force into a lady. Yeah?”

  “OK daddy-o.” Cody say’s beaming his full smile at Logan. Logan graces him with a beautiful smile back.

  “So how’s my little man? You being good with Helen and Ashley, taking care of things?”

  Oh, my God, this scene is too much. Logan must have felt me tense in his hand (which he reclaimed). I try to pull it away. He doesn’t let me. He gives me a squeeze instead and pulls me a little closer. He put’s Cody down between us.

  “I’ve been good. I even killed a huge spider for them. Ashley was screaming, and Helen came running. But I already took care of it. Like any man would do.” Cody say’s this last statement and stands up taller, obviously proud of himself.

  “Good job buddy.” Logan tells him while scruffing his hair.

  “Well now I know who to call if there’s a spider in the cottage. I hate them. (I give an exaggerate shudder and Cody laughs) And they are huge here! I think Mrs. ChubbyWubby Meowy Pants likes to eat them.”

  Logan’s smiling face is now pointed in my direction. Cody has a wide eyed expression. Then say’s in his little boy voice, “I think she needs to go on a diet.”

  “I think your right, but she can eat spiders any time she wants.”

  “I’ll get them for you Laura. I just stomp on them like this.” Cody stomps his little cowboy booted foot hard on the ground.

  Logan’s pocket begins to ring. He pulls out his phone and answers. “Hey Vinny.”

  He looks towards the mountains, face serious for a minute, then tells Vinny that he’ll call him back after he speaks to me. Then hangs up. Oh, Vinny, the mechanic. Uh,oh.

  “OK darlin’’, I know this has not been a great day for you so far, but here’s something you need to process. Your truck. Or what you like to call a truck.”

  I scowl.

  Logan’s lip tip up, “Vinny looked at it, thoroughly. He say’s to fix it will cost a mint, and you could get something new or almost new for the same money. He’s honest, as honest as they come. It took longer because he was calling around seeing if he could get you all the parts, which is most of the engine, the transmission and the shocks at cheaper prices. Even with the cheaper prices, he said it ain’t worth it.” Logan cups the side of my face with his palm. Comforting. “Sorry babe, don’t know if you were really attached to it.”

  He’s being sweet. I bet he’s wondering if I have memories of my family attached to that truck. It was old enough I could have memories of long lost great, great grandparents driving around in the truck. But no.

  “That’s fine. No attachment to the truck.” And I emphasize truck. It did get me from New York to here, safely. “Does Vinny know what I should do with it?”

  “Well there’s the good news. He said he can sell it for the metal, get you five hundred dollars. I wanted to run it by you first, and make sure that’s what you’d want to do.”

  “Yeah, that’s actually good.” I have the money for a new car, or truck, or whatever. I hope they have a dealership somewhere around here. “Are there any dealerships around here?”

  Chuckling Logan answers, “Honey you’re in Texas, not in Never-Never land.”

  **********

  After Logan called back Vinny, Cody ran off to play with Ashley. Logan then proceeds to show me his ranch. He’s proud of it, as he should be, it’s beautiful. It was his father’s ranch, and when he passed, being an only child it all became Logan’s. He points out where the stables are and the latest adjustments that are being made before opening it up for more children to come for equine therapy.

  Helen comes by walking slowly with Zoe. I felt myself get nervous after my last encounter with her where I acted like a marathon runner. Thankfully Helen just smiles at me and gives me a little wave. I smile back. I’m thankful that she let my earlier incident go.

  From what Logan has told me Helen is really passionate about the program that is just getting off the ground. They have a handful of kids already enrolled on a half day program along with Ashley and Cody. Logan beams as he tells me the progress some of the children are already making, including Ashley.

  Standing in the shade is Zoe. Logan walks up to his Aunt and puts his arm around her frail shoulder. He towers over her, it’s nice to see him look at her with love. “Aunt Zoe, why don’t you go in where it’s cooler?”

  “Logan boy, don’t worry about me. I’m good for a few more minutes and then I’m going to go inside. They are having a new competition on television soon.”

  Logan informs me in front of Zoe that she is add
icted to reality TV. A friend of hers is picking her up soon and they go to her place to watch it and laugh.

  “I am not addicted, it’s just interesting.” Zoe slaps Logan’s arm playfully pretending to admonish him.

  Then Zoe turns to me and grasps my hand, and smiles at me. She has a kind face. “Cody tells me a lot about you. I’m glad you entered into my men’s lives my dear. Take it from an old woman, I’m glad you’re here.”

  “Zoe.” Logan say’s in warning.

  “I’m just stating the facts my dear, hush. Gotta get inside and grab my stuff. See you later my dears.” With that Zoe starts to make her way to the beautiful log mansion. Logan eye’s one of his men, and they run to the side of the barn to drive around in a little tractor that looks more like a two seated golf cart. He stops next to Zoe and speaks for a minute. She seems to argue, looks over at Logan and shakes her head. Logan pretends not to notice. But Zoe gets in and is driven back to the house.

  Everyone that I meet seems so genuine. Like a real family, they genuinely care about each other. I’m glad that Logan and Cody have them in their lives.

  I’m tired from my emotional breakdown and running away like a damsel in distress. Even though everything is beautiful including the people around me, I feel like I need to get back to my cottage. I need to decompress. Plus I have a few pieces of jewelry that I need to finish.

  Logan understands and doesn’t let me argue when he turns and starts to walk me back.

  “Logan, seriously, I appreciate the offer, but, uh, no. I can make it back just fine.” I try to give Logan a smile, but it’s shaky.

  “Laura, let me do this. My Mama instilled manners on me, and one of those is walking my lady home.”

  “Oh, all right.” I give in, but I feel all mushy and warm inside. Chivalry is so not dead in the Thompson household.

  We are walking in comfortable silence when I hear the song “baby’s got back” playing from my pocket.

  I feel my face flame, again. Logan smiles at me.

  Quickly pulling the phone from my pocket answering it, I know its Jenny. She programmed that ring tone. I would have called Jenny back, but I needed that song to end. Like before it started. Yeah, I could have just silenced it, but answering was faster.

  “Yup.”

  I hear Logan chuckle from my greeting.

  Jenny is trying to keep it together on the other end of the conversation, but I know her too well to know when she’s upset. And she’s very upset. I stop walking. Logan turns me fully so he can watch me, intently. I really need today to be over. What else is going to be thrown my way?

  “Jen, slow down, breathe, and tell me everything.”

  She does. She takes in a loud calming breath.

  “Laura, I went to your place because the closing is Tuesday, and I have the company coming tomorrow, sorry honey, to get Ellie and Graces stuff that I donated to the shelter we agreed on. When I got there today just to go through it, make sure everything was in order for them to pick up… brace yourself honey.” I braced. Logan felt me brace and went on alert. “Your place was ransacked.”

  I wobble as the blood rushes from my face.

  Logan places a steady hand on my back, “What the fuck Laura, who is that?” Logan growls.

  “What do you mean ransacked, and don’t sugar coat it. Tell me Jenny.”

  I feel Logan get solid next to me. He grabs my phone. Can this day get any worse? I thought by moving here I was getting away from this bullshit.

  “This is Logan Thompson, Laura’s man.”

  Laura’s man? What. But I just stand there staring.

  Laura’s man.

  Mine.

  Logan’s smooth voice must have calmed Jenny right down. “Talk to me, and tell me everything, don’t leave anything out, even if you think it’s not important.” It’s at this point I tune everything out, I hear a lot of uh, huh’ing, ok’ing, and ended with a nice talkin to you too darlin’’. He gave Jenny his number and the number to the station, told her to stay safe. Then he hands the phone back over to me.

  I put it to my ear feeling totally and completely numb. That with a full dollop of helpless thrown right on top.

  “Jenny.”

  “I love him!” Jenny screeches in my ear.

  “You just spoke to him for a few minutes.” Even though I am in a daze I am able to proclaim this.

  “Doesn’t matter. From what you said, and from our conversation, although brief, he is the shit. Don’t let go. Hold on, and hold on tight. Don’t over think it. Don’t let your fear of letting someone in ruin it. Do you hear me Laura Gennings? I am coming next weekend anyway.”

  “You’re coming here next weekend.” I reply on a half sob.

  Jenny gently say’s “Yeah sweetie, I’ll see you next weekend. Love you like a sister, you know that.”

  “Love you too sweetie.” I say while hanging up.

  Logan takes my phone back from me and starts punching in all different numbers. He then takes out his phone and starts punching in different numbers.

  “OK, babe. My numbers are programmed into your phone, my cell, my house, and my office, and last Jonsie’s cell. I only work on a few cases with the department, so best bet is to reach me on my cell not at the station.”

  “What’s going on Logan?”

  “Something isn’t adding up. I don’t like it.”

  “Why would someone break into my apartment and ruin what I had left there?” I ask quietly.

  “From what Jenny described, it sounds like they were looking for something honey. The cops are there now taking pictures. I’m gonna call in some favors and have them sent to me so I can see what’s going on too. And I fully intend on finding out what’s going on. I hate to ask, I do, especially now, but do you have a picture of your sisters ex? And of your ex boyfriend.”

  “My ex? What would he have to do with it?”

  “Darlin’, I like what we have here, and I think you get me when I say I protect what’s mine. That means leaving no stone unturned. So yeah, even your asshole ex.”

  “But I’m not yours.” I say stubbornly. “And isn’t that a little caveman of you? My woman. Newsflash, you can’t claim ownership of a person. And trust me on this Logan, I don’t think you want to lay claim to me and my truck load of baggage.”

  Logan puts both hands on my face and holds my head gently, yet making sure I am looking right at him. With his sexy as fuck voice he answers, “Yeah you are. And everyone has baggage darlin’. If I only wanted you during good times then I would only get a piece of you, and I want all of you. So I’ll take all you have to give, even the baggage.”

  “Why, seriously why? You’re a good man. You can find a better woman without problems biting at their heels” I put my hands on my hips genuinely curious.

  “You went to the school to pick up my son. You took care of him when he was sick. You also had my back when that bitch came up to us in the restaurant.”

  “Anybody would do the same,” I try to interrupt.

  “No, not everyone would do the same. We’re good together. When you let go you’re funny, sweet, and caring. You’re my woman, get used to it. You like it, stop fighting it just because you’re scared. We’ll find out what’s going on, and in the mean time I’ll keep you safe. Besides, I made you come and I didn’t even do it using my cock yet. I’m looking forward to getting you naked, in my bed.”

  “Don’t be crude Logan.” I try to glare, but am getting extremely turned on, despite the news I just got.

  “Darlin’, what we have here works, it feels good, tell me you feel it too.”

  “Logan, I don’t think….”

  “Don’t think, just feel. Tell me you feel it too.” He looks into my eyes studying me. I hate when he does that, I am sure he can see how much I want him. Grace always said you can tell everything I’m thinking just by looking at me. I totally have to work on my poker face.

  Problem is I do feel it. A connection. I feel safe with him. His son’s adorable. He
’s a gentleman. He’s kind, genuine. I enjoy hearing about his life, and love being the one to have new experiences with him. He’s caring. He brings out a side of me that I have kept hidden and makes it feel right. He’s hot. Sexy. Oh, and did I mention…HOT!!

  “Yeah, I feel it Logan, but….”

  “No, no buts. Just feel. I know that scares the crap out of you, we’ll work on that too.”

  When I finally open my mouth to respond Logan silences me by crashing his mouth against mine. Whatever I was going to say get’s lost when my mind goes to mush with his kiss. Damn he can kiss.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Hidden Journal

  I’m sitting on the floor inside a closet with the door closed. I’m contemplating the idea of never venturing out. Constant drilling and hammering is all I’ve heard for hours. I think Logan wants to secure this tiny cottage as well as Fort Knox. When they’re done with the “basic alarm system” (Logan told me he was planning on updating the cottage with anyway when I argued about paying for it), the Queen herself can come for a visit, sit on my couch and drink tea with me and have no fear. Then why do I still feel afraid?

  That’s easy to answer.

  I’m afraid of the strong feelings I have for Logan. I’m afraid of opening my heart again. I’m afraid of losing the people that I am beginning to love. And I am afraid of what problems are following me from New York, if anything, and why.

  I’m also ignoring the fact that Logan gave me a car to use. Actually it’s not a car, it’s a jeep. I think I can handle that. He took me to a little supermarket and the post office to see if I was comfortable in it after I explained my anxiety of closed in vehicles.

  Instead of judging he was sympathetic. He insisted when I tried to decline. Then he gave me that look, which still had me trying to decline. But then he kissed me. I think he now realizes that his kisses work. They shut me up, and he can get away with almost anything. We will have to discuss this form of convincing or should I say lip induced mind control.