by Dylan Allen
He stands like that for a minute, kissing me, holding me in his strong arms like I weigh nothing.
I feel weightless, like if he let me go, I would defy gravity and float away. I drape my arms over his shoulders and pull myself up and slam back down.
“Oh, shit, Kal,” he groans my name and I feel a surge of power. I press my forehead against his. Our kiss is a teasing one, we nip each other’s lips, our tongues twine and our breaths intermingle.
Then, he lifts me off his dick and lets me fall back on the bed. He reaches to the lamp on the bedside table and the dark room floods with soft, hazy light.
I’ve never felt comfortable being naked with the lights on. Even before I had Bianca, but especially not since. My body bears the marks of carrying and nursing my daughter.
But Remi’s gaze is nothing short of adoring as his eyes burn a path up my body. I feel… nothing but beautiful.
Right now, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to feel him inside of me. To have his mouth on me. His tongue in my pussy. His dick in my ass, his cum all over me.
“Please… do something.”
“Tsk, tsk, tsk… no pleases here. You don’t ask for what is yours.” He drops to his knees in front of me. He big hands cup my thighs and he pushes them open.
“You haven’t shaved.” He sounds so pleased; his breath blows hot over me.
“Not since I got divorced.”
His expression darkens. “All of this is mine.” He drops kisses and drags licks on the inside of my thighs in between his words.
“Yes. Yours.”
Like he wants to reward me, he pulls my clit between those soft, sweet lips and he starts to suck me just the way I like it. He slips his thumb, just the tip of it, into my ass and I gasp at the surprise burn.
“Does that feel good?” he asks, and I’m so distracted by the scrape of his stubble against the inside of my thigh, that all I can do is moan and roll my hips and fuck myself on his hand. Just when I feel the first flutter of my orgasm, he pulls out.
His hips fill the cradle of mine and he holds me still while his thick dick becomes my master. I open my legs as wide as I can and wrap them around him.
He presses a kiss to my neck and then takes my lips in the most delicious kiss while he slides inside my pulsing sex. The sweet sting that accompanies his first stroke is prelude to my pleasure and I welcome it.
My body arches off the mattress, a slow, reach upward for something… and when his dick hits the top of my pussy, I wrap my arms around his neck to keep myself attached to him.
“Yeah, baby, hold on. I’m about to fuck you like the blessing you are.”
His muscular body quivers above me. My knees grip his waist and the ripple of muscle combined with each of his thrusts is almost as potent as his cock is in sending a fire burning through me. His mouth is pressed against my neck and the pace of his hot, heavy breaths match the pace of his hips between mine.
He tugs the tie from my wrists and growls, “touch me,” before my cocky, sweet, sexy, gentleman unleashes, lets go and fucks me like the beast only I turn him into.
My fingers celebrate their emancipation by running in hungry fascination over the grooves of his muscles and pinching my nipples until I start to come.
“Remington…” His name is a moan that curls up from deep inside of me and falls from my parted lips like a hosanna.
“Kalilah…” his reply is a promise.
And then, he lets out the most exquisite, rumbly groan I swear I’ve ever heard and comes so hard inside of me that I feel it at the very center of me. I follow him over the edge of my orgasm where I float, suspended on a cloud of fulfillment and pleasure so raw, tears spill from the corners of my eyes.
I wrap my arms around him, hold him close to me and savor being in his arms and knowing that, at least for now, I can stay here.
“Fucking delicious,” he whispers before he pulls me into him.
As his body relaxes into sleep next to mine, I think about my future.
I’ve come full circle. To the place where I first felt like a woman, in the arms of the man I belong to. I’ve imagined all of the worst-case scenarios and the only one I know I can’t live with is doing something that would drive us apart. Not when we’re both finally free.
It took fourteen years, but fate appears to finally be on our side.
I choose him.
This time, I’m going to outdraw love.
I won’t lose this again.
33
SURPRISE
KAL
I sit down with my cup of coffee and wince when my ass touches the wooden seat of the dining room chair. The apex of my thighs aches from Remi being between them for most of the night. I sip my coffee and moan at the slide of hot liquid down my throat combined with the memory of the way he used me.
All of my me. My mouth, my pussy, my ass.
God, I’d forgotten what it felt like to be thoroughly and completely fucked. His dedicated runs and work outs have left him in great shape and his stamina outpaced mine. He had to carry me to the shower when we were done in bed. I’m surprised I’m walking steadily this morning. I’m not looking forward to the long drive back to Houston.
“You have everything?” Remi walks out of the bedroom and shoves his phone into his pocket.
“Mm-hmm,” I mumble around a mouthful of Cheerios. Remi leans against the counter and his pocket starts vibrating.
I raise my eyebrows. “You turned it on.”
His dark eyebrows furrow in annoyance. “I’m ignoring it.”
I shovel the last bite of cereal into my mouth and stand to take my bowl to the sink. “Great. I’m ready to go. I need to stop for gas, but I’ll just follow you to town.”
“We can leave your car here and come back for it later.” He grabs my arm as I pass him and pulls me to him.
“I need my car for work in Houston. I’ll be right behind you.” I place the bowl on the counter and press my body flush to his.
“I’d rather you were right beside me.” His warm breath bathes the side of neck.
I roll my hips against his. “I’d rather be right on top of you.”
“You’re insatiable.” His grin is huge and proud.
“How could I not be?” I let him have that because I love that smile. He deserves to smile like that. I want to make sure he always does.
He hoods his eyelids and his lips, unobscured by the beard he’d shaved off this morning, curve into a sultry smile.
He lifts my sweater. “I’d like to be inside that spectacular ass of yours again.”
He bends his head and pulls my tight, already throbbing nipple into his mouth and sucks hard. His teeth circle the sensitive tip and he tugs.
“Oh, Remi.” I sigh. He lets go of my breast and drags his lips up my chest, up my neck and finally arrives at my mouth. But he doesn’t kiss me.
“We don’t have that kind of time. But… we could—”
Someone pounds on the front door and we freeze. We both turn to look at the door and see the silhouette of someone out there, but it’s so frosted I can’t even tell if it’s a man or woman.
“You expecting someone?”
“No, and Nancy didn’t bark. She’s outside.” He eyes the door and then heads toward it. He touches a panel in the wall that pops open and he pulls his shotgun out. The person pounds again. This time, they call out, “Hello?”
I follow him and by the time he’s pulling the door open, I’m standing behind him.
An old man, with a long white, unkempt beard covering half his face, a dirty, faded, worn light blue baseball cap pulled down so low his eyes are hard to see stands before us.
But there’s a friendly smile on his face. Remi’s dog is sitting docilely by his side.
“Hello there, sir. Sorry to knock like this.”
He pulls off his baseball cap and I gasp. He looks so much like… no. I shake the thought out of my head.
Until I see Remi’s face. Then, I know I’m not wrong. He�
��s thunderstruck and is just gaping at the man. The man’s eyes dart left to right nervously. He reaches down to scratch Nancy’s head, and she preens into his touch.
“I’ve been looking for her for almost a year.”
“Well, damn,” Remi says and the hollow shock in his voice makes me wince.
Oh, God.
“She been with you all this time?” The man drops down on one knee and looks his dog in the eyes. “Missed you, baby, did those boys hurt you?” He runs a hand down her sleek black coat and caresses the stump where her tail had been.
Remi puts his gun down.
“She’s yours?”
“Yeah, some kids led her away while I was asleep almost a year ago. I sleep down by the underpass in—”
“They cut off her tail and left her for dead in a ditch.”
The man’s face crumples in anguish and drops his head into his hands. And then he sobs hysterically. Nancy nuzzles him with her nose and after a few seconds his sobs subside.
I rush up to stand next to him and put my hands on the man’s shoulders. They are bone thin and shaking from his sobs. But what strikes me is how thin the fabric of his shirt is. Then he coughs, a rattling, wet, unproductive sound that I can tell isn’t a normal cough.
I look at Remi, and his expression has morphed. From shock to anger.
“Remi, we need to bring him inside. He’s not well.”
“Who are you?” Remi barks down, his voice is brittle with anger.
The man’s sobs grow loud again. The dog whines and rubs her head on his shoulder.
“Remi!” I chide him and stand in front of the man and put what I hope is a reassuring hand on his chest. His heart thunders under my palm. His eyes are narrowed and menacing, his square chin wobbles as he struggles to maintain his composure.
“I know you’re scared. I’m scared, too. But we’ve got to bring him inside. Something is wrong with him.” He just stares straight ahead at the sobbing man.
“Please,” I add softly. He looks down at me, and the anguish in his eyes makes my knees weak.
“Kal, what the fuck is going on?” He grabs my arms; his eyes darken to that unreadable black that they were when I met him.
“I don’t know. But we’ll figure it out, okay?”
I turn back to the crying man and drop to my knee so we’re face-to-face.
“What’s your name?” I ask him gently.
“They call me John.” He darts a nervous glance at Remi, his eyes widen at whatever he sees there and then he looks back at me.
“I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“We don’t think you did. I’m Kal. This is Remington.” I say Remi’s full name because I want to see if there’s a spark of recognition. There isn’t.
“Well, from the looks of that fella, I’m not so sure about that.”
“He’s just surprised to see someone come looking for the dog. He’s had her a while.”
“Oh, yeah. Thank you for that. She’s been with me since she was a pup.”
His face is dirty, his beard is knotted, and hanging in straggly strands almost to his chest. But there’s no mistaking that he looks just like Remi’s grandfather. His nose, the color of his hair. But it’s his eyes, that blue that rivals the cloudless sky behind us, that seals the deal.
“Sir. Will you let us bring you inside?”
“Why?” he stands back up. He adjusts his posture and I can see the same pride that runs through Remi straighten his shoulders.
“How did you find her?” Remi asks. His voice isn’t angry, but its tone is taut and clipped.
The man takes a step back and shrugs slowly. “She must have seen me—she always had the keenest way of knowing when someone was coming. I was walking up that way from town”—he points in the direction of Fredericksburg— “and she just ran up beside me and then turned and came up this way.”
“I see.” Remi’s response is distracted, his voice hollow.
He eyes the house and nods his head. “This place still looks good.”
“You know this house?” I ask and Remi and I share a surprised glance.
“Oh, yeah, I’ve walked this way once a year for decades. Back to the place I was found.”
“Where’s that?”
He slips his baseball cap back on and his eyes disappear from view again. “A ditch near San Antonio,” he says and then starts to cough again. I put an arm around him and have to stifle a gasp when I feel how prominent his bones are.
“Sir, come in. Let me get you something hot to drink for your cough. I just made some turkey sandwiches. Think you’d like one?”
His eyes light up. “Oh, that sounds nice. I can eat out here though. Being in that house. It gives me a headache.”
“You’ve been inside?” I wince at how harsh Remi’s voice is.
“Well, whoever owns it, is always having work done to it. You know renovating. The contractors pick up day workers from outside the Home Depot in Fredericksburg. I always jump on those crews. But I stopped working here about ten years ago. I would get these headaches, so bad they’d end up sending me home, and once, they wouldn’t even pay me for my time.”
“Headaches?”
He reaches to touch the base of his skull. “Bad ones, right here—”
“Tell us about the ditch,” Remi interjects
The man’s eyes widen at the impatience in his voice. I shoot Remi a disapproving look. But inside my heart is racing and impatience is making my pulse race, too. I want to know, too, but I know that the fastest way to get it isn’t to demand it from him like that.
“Take your time, tell us what you can.”
He glances wearily at Remi and then at me.
“Well, that’s why I started crying just then. Just the thought that my girl suffered the same fate as me.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, foreboding crawling up my arms.
Remi hand closes over mine and he squeezes it hard.
“When they found me, I had parts cut off, too.” He holds up his left hand his ring and pinkie finger are gone. Right down to the root.
I gasp in horror.
“What happened?”
“I don’t know. Don’t remember. Never have. They call me John and it suits me just fine. My first memories are waking up. Calling for help. Help coming. No one knows how I got there. No one’s ever come looking for a fella who looked like me.”
I’m speechless and can’t fathom what he’s been through.
“John, let me get that food. And of course, we can sit out here while you eat.”
“Sure. That would be very nice, indeed.”
“Okay, we’ll leave you and Nancy to get reacquainted.”
“Her name’s Gigi.” He pets the top of the dog’s head.
“Of course, it is.” I smile at him.
I grab Remi’s hand and we go inside. “We’ll be right back and then we’ll talk.”
34
JOHN DOE
REMI
My heart is beating so fast my whole body is vibrating from the speed of the blood rushing through it. I’m trying to think, but in my ears, there’s this loud whooshing sound that I can’t get rid of.
The way it was when I saw Kal standing on my doorstep a few days ago.
Times ten.
I let Kal lead me back inside and push me down into a chair at the table. She sits down next to me and grabs my hands and starts to rub them as if she’s trying to warm me up.
“Is that my father?” I ask the most improbable question. I feel like someone dropped an anvil on my head.
“He looks just like your grandfather.” She shakes her head and covers her mouth like she can’t believe she said it. Then she drops her hand and leans forward, her eyes wide with shock. “I mean, they could be twins. His eyes.” With every word she speaks something I can’t define but know I won’t be able to contain grows inside of me.
“Kal—”
“Remi. He woke up in a ditch. With his fingers cut off.”
“I know,” I roar. My hand slaps the table, and the salt and pepper shakers in the middle rattle with the force of it.
Kal’s eyes bulge and she slaps both hands over her mouth.
“I know,” I say more quietly and then I drop my head into my hands.
“Oh, Remi. I’m here.” She jumps up and puts an arm around me.
She presses her body into mine and strokes my neck. She feels so real, so warm, so here…
But all I can think is that this won’t last either. That something will come along and destroy it. My heart constricts with each glide of her fingers across the tense muscles in my neck.
I can feel his presence outside the door, innocuous and yet goading me at the same time. I glance back at the door.
“Let’s go talk to him,” I say after a minute. I’m terrified of what he’s going to say. But, I’m more terrified that he’s going to leave and I’ll never know.
She slides off my lap, and hurries over to the small coolers she packed this morning. “Let me get him his food.”
A startling thought comes to me and I grab her hand as she’s walking past me.
“Let’s take him to Houston with us.”
She puts the sandwiches on the table and places both hands on my shoulders. I look up at her and her eyes soften with sympathy. Normally, I hate that look, but right now it’s very welcome.
“Let’s see what he has to say first, Remi. See if he’s even willing to come to Houston,” she says gently.
“Oh, he’s fucking coming to Houston. If I have to tie him up, throw him in the truck and drive with him kicking and screaming the whole way.”
I stand up and take a steadying breath and then walk outside. She puts a hand on the door handle as I start to turn it.
“Remi, I want you to take it easy. He’s sick. If we take him to Houston, we’ve got to get him to a doctor before we do anything else. I think he’s dehydrated, and that cough doesn’t sound good.”
“Those are the least of his troubles.” I open the door and squint against the morning sun. We’re going to be late getting back to Houston, but it doesn’t matter. He’s sitting on the porch steps with his back to the door and I recognize the set of his broad, but very frail shoulders. It’s just like mine. And Hayes’.