She's Not There

by Marla Madison

  “Nothing confidential ‘bout it, if there’s no case.”

  “I suppose that’s true. You’re aware then of the statistics I brought to the police, and you probably also know they ran their own a while back. So why do you want to discuss this with me? ”

  10

  TJ lifted her legs off the ottoman and leaned forward. “Have to go back in time a little to explain. Left the force ‘bout six years ago and tried working as a PI. Got a license and hung out my shingle, so to speak. Didn’t do real well, but things picked up when I finally got a few referrals from contacts in the department.

  “Few years back, a doctor from Waukesha was arrested and convicted of killing his wife. Attorney who took up his appeal recommended me as an investigator. Thought my ties with the force would give me an edge in finding somethin’ new to use for his appeal. The Doc got off on the appeal because I found out the search that turned up his wife’s blood in his car was illegal. Great thing for him but pissed off the department and about put an end to my PI career.

  “The Doc was real grateful and got me a part-time job doing security for a big bank near Brookfield Square shopping mall.”

  “How long were you part of the police force?”

  “’Bout eight years. Like I said, why I quit is the long story part.”

  Lisa said nothing, opting to let the other woman continue her story.

  “Since then I’ve done real well doing the bank gig and free-lancing in security. Got to know the Doc well enough to know he was no killer or abuser. Loved his wife, but the woman was a drinker. One night he came home from the hospital late. She was drunk and started accusing him of cheating. She lost it, started throwin’ things around, smashing good china and glass, that kinda thing. When he tried to stop her she started screaming and dialed 911. So he ended up with an incident on record.”

  Lisa absorbed it all for a minute. “I’m still wondering why you’re coming to me with this?”

  TJ chuckled. “Forgot to mention I also hang with Patty Barkley from time to time. She told me all about you.”

  “Seems like quite a small world around that police department.”

  “Also need to let you know the good detective pawned you off on the department’s biggest tight ass. I gave him hell about it.”

  “You mean James Wilson. He was actually rather informative, but I agree he isn’t what you’d describe as warm and fuzzy.” Lisa smiled, remembering the man’s brusque demeanor. She neglected to add that Conlin hadn’t treated her much better.

  “Yeah, nothin’ warm about that guy. If he wasn’t engaged to the chief’s daughter, he’d a’ been out on his ass a long time ago.”

  Lisa’s eyebrows shot up. “That explains a lot. I wondered how he managed to be such a maverick and get away with it.”

  TJ stood, pacing. “Anyway, like I said, I been tellin’ Richard—he hates bein’ called Dick—that something’s going on. Didn’t need any fancy statistics to tell me that. The Doc didn’t kill his wife. An’ that woman never woulda left him; she was way too crazy about all the goodies that came with bein’ married to a rich doctor. She loved him in her own weird way—an’ there wasn’t any boyfriend. I never told him this, but after all my diggin‘, I’d have to say she wasn’t the sharpest knife in the block. That woman never woulda figured out how to disappear without leaving tracks.”

  Drawn into TJ’s tale, Lisa still had no idea why she was its recipient.

  TJ sat back down, her small butt balanced on the edge of the chair. “I know there’s another wife missing an’ there’s rumors she was seeing you. That true?”

  “You know I can’t reveal that.”

  “An’ you know with a little pokin’ around I can find that out for myself.”

  “TJ, although we do have the same concern, I don’t understand what you want from me. James Wilson did make some good points. No bodies have turned up, and the police believe there is an organization in Milwaukee helping abused women to relocate.” Lisa didn’t add that she too was desperate to find answers to why women were disappearing.

  “Miz Rayburn, the police ain’t gonna do nothin’ about this unless they get some solid info. I figure together, we do some snoopin’ around, get them something to go on, then they’ll have to open an investigation.”

  Lisa nearly slid off the leather chair. “Together? I’m a clinical psychologist, not a detective. And even if I was willing to help, I really don‘t see how I could. And you can call me Lisa.” Her feet getting cold in more ways than one, Lisa got up to retrieve her discarded shoes. She wanted to find out what was happening to the women, but this was way out of her league.

  TJ followed, still talking. “What if I told you that I know something the police don’t? This secret group Wilson’s so proud of finding out about is only one person, and I’m pretty sure there’s only been about two women in the past two years who went that route.”

  Lisa stopped where she stood. “Have you told Detective Conlin about this?”

  “Can’t. Technically, it’s illegal cause most of the women take their kids with them against child custody mandates. He’d feel obligated to report it. Wouldn’t put Richard on the spot like that or risk giving these ladies one less chance to get out.”

  “I still don’t see what you or I could possibly find that would change the minds of the police.”

  TJ grinned. “I have a plan. Can’t do it alone though, I’m gonna need your help.”

  Lisa paused, intrigued but unsure of the wisdom in getting involved. “Let’s say I would be willing to help. What do you think I could do?”

  “Most important part of the plan is to get a list of names from the Women’s Center. Names of abused women who’ve gone missing in the last few years. Then we start crossin’ off names. Exclude any helped by this ‘source,’ any who’ve shown up, any who’ve contacted someone, and most important–any who we’re pretty sure were not offed by their abuser. Once that list gets narrowed, we look at what the rest have in common.”

  Lisa frowned, thinking of all the time it would require to get all that information.

  “Can also throw into the mix the Doc’s wife and your gal that’s gone missin.’ Maybe this gets us something, maybe it doesn’t. It’s a place to start. Be a lot of people to interview, that’s where you come in. Not trying to suck up here, but you must have damn good skills at siphoning through B.S.”

  As concerned as she was—and Lisa had been even more so since talking to Jeff Denison—part of her felt like she’d done what she could with her less-than-fulfilling trip to the MPD and agreeing to take Denison on as a patient. And Amanda was meeting with the heads of the area Centers this week to go over the statistics in question.

  “Wouldn’t the police object to outside interference?”

  TJ started pacing again, gesturing wildly with her hands. “Interference with what? They ain’t investigating anything! If we piss someone off with our questions, the police can’t do a freakin’ thing about it. We aren’t police. And don’t forget, lots of folks will be real glad to see some interest in their missin’ women.” TJ took a deep breath, appearing to rein in her emotions.

  Lisa realized TJ’s initial coolness had been a cover-up. She couldn‘t help but wonder if the woman had told her everything. Maybe she had more personal reasons for wanting to get an investigation started.

  For years Lisa’s entire focus had been on raising Paige and building her practice. The textbook she’d begun writing had been her first outside interest in a long time other than fixing up her house. Her fleeting affairs didn’t take up much of her time. Her head was shouting at her not to do this, but her heart remembered her own troubled marriage, begging her to do everything she possibly could for these women. Pandora’s Box creaked open. “All right. What do we do first?”

  TJ looked triumphant, her smile radiant. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”

  “And that person is . . .?”

  “The guy who helps women disappear.”

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nbsp; Finally slipping into her shoes, Lisa stopped, dumbfounded. Balanced on one heel, she asked, “You really know this person?”

  “Yep. What are you doin’ Saturday?”

  Lisa managed to get both shoes on her feet. “I‘m . . . not sure yet.”

  TJ moved toward the door. “I’ll meet you in town on Sixty-Second and North Avenue at the Coffee Cup Café. Four o’clock, Saturday. An’ don’t wear what you’re wearin’ now. Turn it down a notch; don’t look so shrinkish, you know?”

  11

  Saturday afternoon Lisa drove into Milwaukee to meet TJ Peacock. It was a crisp autumn day, the trees proudly displaying their bright warm hues. Giant white and steel blue clouds moved lazily across the sky. The kind of day that made a person glad to be alive.

  Lisa, feeling good, but with reservations about the meeting, arrived on North Avenue and found a parking spot a few doors down from the coffee shop. The neighborhood, caught between the inner city and Wauwatosa, was filled with a diverse blend of people, interesting shops and every kind of ethnic restaurant.

  TJ was nowhere to be seen when Lisa walked into the coffee shop, so she slid into a booth near the back to watch for her. Two Asian women, who looked like mother and daughter, were the only patrons, sitting by the window sipping coffee and having a serious conversation in their native tongue. The lone waitress, decked out in a black smock embroidered with brightly colored coffee cups, wore multiple earrings, including one through her right nostril.

  An adolescent boy entered the store wearing a blue, logo cap sideways, making most of his face invisible. Pants with legs wider than his shoulders and a sweatshirt that hung down nearly to his knees completed his look. He crossed the room and sat down in the booth across from her.

  Startled, Lisa asked, “Are you looking for someone?”

  His face crinkled up with laughter. “Yeah, you!”

  “TJ? Is it really you in there?”

  “Great disguise, huh? Still do some security work for an outfit downtown on weekends. Thought I’d try to fit in with the crowd. See you dressed down too, but I still recognize you.”

  Lisa had worn her Saturday uniform of jeans, sweatshirt, and walking shoes, her hair tied back in a hasty ponytail. “Do you wear a disguise often?”

  “Sometimes, when I wanna blend in. Like when I went to Pewaukee to see you the other night.”

  “You think that outfit made you blend in?”

  “Yeah, guess it was a little overkill. All them rich soccer moms out there wear that snooty casual stuff from L. L. Bean and Eddie Bauer.”

  “They do. People don’t dress up much anymore.”

  “Bring your wallet?” TJ asked.

  “My wallet?”

  “You’re gettin’ your hair done. Made an appointment for you next door.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Person you need to talk to works there. If he’s gonna give us what we need, he’ll need to trust you, too. Get to know you.”

  So the mysterious person who could help women disappear was a hairdresser. Lisa did her own hair, even the highlights, because she hated to spend her precious off time sitting in a salon. “Well, I suppose my hair could use some attention.”

  A young receptionist with hair gelled to defy gravity and colored to challenge a rainbow, told them to have a seat, Roland would be ready for Lisa, “In a wink.”

  Roland had a face graced with perfect features and was one of the handsomest men Lisa had ever seen. He looked a little under six feet tall and wore slim pants with a silk T-shirt that exposed every bit of his buff body. His hair looked like a natural dark blond, the top frozen into hundreds of tiny, light blond, one-inch spikes. Golden brown eyes lit up when he talked, and his bright, wide smile belonged in toothpaste commercial.

  As he hot-ironed the long, nut-brown tresses of a teenager, she beamed as he appeared to be complimenting her on her look.

  When the she left, he invited Lisa to sit in his chair with a “Hello, lovely lady,” that somehow didn’t sound like empty flattery.

  He ran his fingers through her hair. “Looks like you aren’t ready for color yet, but come back to see me in a few weeks. I think the new multitones would soften your look. For today, I’d suggest a shaping and texture cut. This length flatters you so I won’t take much off. And a ten-minute honey and aloe conditioner would make your hair very happy.”

  His good humor and smile were contagious. “Sounds like a plan.”

  She followed him to the back room where he began to shampoo her hair, his fingers gently massaging her scalp in little circles, slowly draining all her tension. Just as she was about to start purring, TJ zeroed in on them.

  “Rollie, I know you ain’t gonna like this, but I have to tell you I brought Lisa here for more than a ‘do’.”

  Roland said nothing as TJ whispered their real purpose in visiting the salon. He rinsed Lisa’s hair, wrapped her head in a towel and had her sit up. She felt his fingers tighten as he spoke softly to TJ. “TJ. I told you no one other than the people involved could ever know about it. I understand why you told Lisa, but you should have discussed it with me first.”

  12

  An hour later, Roland, wearing faded jeans, and a leather jacket, came into the coffee shop and sat down next to Lisa.

  “TJ, I’m sorry I got upset with you, but you should have talked to me about this first, instead of putting Lisa in the middle. When you get this list of missing women I’ll tell you which women we did not help. That might not make sense to you two, but then I’d feel like I didn’t actually give you names.”

  Lisa frowned. “We can work with that. But you said “we.” I thought you worked alone.”

  Roland snorted, looking at TJ. “Well, at least you didn’t tell her the whole story.”

  “Roland, we can do it any way makes you comfortable,“ Lisa said. “If you don’t want to give me any details, that’s fine. The important thing is that we find something we can go back to the police with. And eliminating women who left willingly will be a necessary first step.”

  Lisa realized she was committed now. Someone had to find out what was happening to these women.

  “I’m glad you feel that way, Lisa,” Roland told her. “I’ll tell you this much—I do this by myself, but sometimes there are things I can’t do alone. I have a few close friends who help out, but on an as-needed basis, and they’re never given names. The process can get expensive, and the women most in need are always the ones with the least funds.”

  Roland paused when the waitress appeared with their coffee. “About five years ago, when I first started doing this, I paid all of the expenses myself. The first time a close friend was beaten so badly by her boyfriend that she nearly died. I helped her leave town, and now she’s happily married and living in another state. She’s repaid me for what I covered when she left, but not everyone has been able to do that.

  “My partner and I are going to buy a condo together in the third ward and that’s cut down on how much I’ve been able to contribute. I’ve only been able to help out two women the last year or so.”

  “It sounds like there are quite a few people who know about this.”

  “They’re all friends who care about women. Our world is different. In our network of friends, there are never betrayals.”

  “Never is a long time,” Lisa said.

  TJ interrupted, before Lisa and Roland could argue about it. “Lisa, hope you’re goin’ out tonight. You’ll really turn heads with that great hair.”

  TJ was right. Lisa loved what Roland had done with her hair. Before she left the salon she’d made an appointment to have her hair colored.

  “No plans. I don’t go out much.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s a long story.”

  Roland dropped a bill on the table. “I’ll leave you two ladies to finish your coffee. Let me know when you want to go over that list.”

  Lisa watched him walk out of the shop. “He’s an impressive man.”


  “Yeah. Rollie and I go way back. So what’s your story? You gay, too?”

  Where did that come from? “No. Although life might be simpler if I were.”

  “Simpler how?”

  “I was married a long time ago. It ended badly and left me with a young daughter to raise. I wasn’t a great mother—well, not really a bad mother—I just wasn’t there for her emotionally during the years that mattered. After my marriage ended, I was on a quest to find Mr. Perfect. I was gone a lot.” Lisa felt a tug of guilt, remembering.

  “So what happened with your girl?” TJ listened eagerly, leaning forward with her elbows on the table.

  “I raised her on my own.” Talking or even thinking about her inadequacies as a mother was difficult.

  TJ studied her. “Funny, you and me have more in common than I woulda’ thought. Me, I have commitment issues. That’s why the good detective and I have lasted so long. We’re alike that way.”

  “Have you ever discussed that with him?”

  “Sounds like a shrink question, so I’m gonna ignore it. Save it for our ‘therapy’ session.” She snickered. “So what do you do for male companionship?” TJ raised her eyebrows for emphasis on the word ‘companionship’.

  Lisa didn’t want to get into the details of her poor choices in men or confide that she was a forty-two-year-old romance junkie. “I’m just coming out of a relationship that didn’t work out well. I guess you could say I’m taking a break right now.”

  “Yeah, best to take a breather.” TJ stood up and stretched. “I have plans tonight, so better be moving on out of here. Thanks for comin’ Lisa. Wasn’t sure you would. Now that we know Rollie’s gonna check off his ladies, our next step has to be the list. If you have any problems gettin’ it let me know and I’ll see what I can do.”

  “What if it leads us nowhere?”

  “There’s always plan B.”

  “And that is . . .?”

  “Didn’t want to mention it, but I have a friend who works at the Journal if we get desperate.”