by Vella Munn
“Winter?” Pearson cleared his throat. “I’m not going to say this well, but Dad was certainly murdered? There’s no doubt of it?”
“None.” Her eyes burned from tears she couldn’t shed. She hadn’t spelled out what had been done to his father. Later, once she’d reconciled herself to the reality, she’d tell him everything. “I can’t say whether the investigators will want to talk to you.”
“Give them this number. I’ll help in any way I can. The last time Dad and I talked, I hogged the conversation. His oldest granddaughter is turning into a hell of a basketball player, and I was hoping he’d have time to come watch her. There was…”
Concentrating on Pearson was becoming difficult. Jay’s gaze was a mix of compassion, tension and something else. She appreciated the compassion but didn’t understand the other emotions. Maybe he was looking forward to not having to be around her.
“Winter?” Pearson asked. “Right after Dad and I talked last, I told my wife I couldn’t remember him ever sounding so excited. I asked if he believed he was going accomplish what he’d hoped to by going to Olympic. He said it was turning out to be better than he’d dreamed possible.”
She stared at Jay. “Did he explain what he was talking about?”
“I’m not sure.”
“What do you mean?”
“He asked how long I thought wood and hair would last in a forest.”
The wolf mask! “That’s all?”
“No, it isn’t. I was a little pissed at him. Does that mean anything to you?”
“I’m sorry.” She had to work at getting the lie out. “It doesn’t.”
“I wish my last conversation with my father had been different.” Pearson cleared his throat and repeated, “He was so excited.”
And that could have led directly to his death.
Jay waited until Winter had put her cell phone away before taking hold of her shoulders so she had no choice but to face him. Despite what they’d been through, they were virtually strangers. He had no right touching her, but maybe this was the only way he could get her to focus on him.
“We need to talk about what Dr. Gilsdorf’s son said.”
“You heard?”
“Yeah. Gilsdorf brought up how long wood and hair might last in a cool, humid climate. What was that about?”
She briefly closed her eyes. “Doc was talking to his son, not me.”
“But he might have said the same thing to you. Did he?”
“What is this about? I want to learn who killed Doc and why. That’s all that matters to me.”
She was sidestepping something. Well, hell, so was he. He also had to deal with her slight, warm body and dark glittering eyes.
“Listen to me. Dr. Gilsdorf talked to you about the lack of cooperation he was getting from the local tribes, right?”
She nodded.
“We’ve been hurt before, starting with when the first explorers showed up with diseases we had no defenses against. We’ve lost most of the land our ancestors’ bones are buried on.”
“You’re blaming Doc for what happened hundreds of years ago?”
She was right, that wasn’t the point. Damn it, he couldn’t say what he wanted to, after all. Yes, she was a woman in shock, but she was also an anthropologist, and that made her dangerous.
“Of course not,” he said. “Michael admitted Dr. Gilsdorf rubbed him the wrong way. The professor had the same impact on my people.”
“Your people?” Her lip started to tremble. She closed her teeth around it. “Earlier, you acknowledged that I’m Native American. Now, you seem to be deliberately putting distance between—”
“No. I didn’t mean that.”
“Then what?”
Tell her something. “You heard Wolf. You heard a spirit guide. I need to tell my uncle, let him decide…”
“Whether he and the other Hoh will help me continue Doc’s work?”
His heart suddenly pounded so it alarmed him. “You’ve made up your mind about that?”
She took several deep breaths. “I’m pretty emotional right now. I don’t trust myself to make an informed decision about anything. Jay?”
“What?” He let go of her. Stared into her black eyes.
“I want to show you something.”
“All right.”
She backed away, shrugged out of her backpack and pulled down on the left side of her shirt’s neckline. He wondered if she was aware that she’d exposed a little of her bra. Then it didn’t matter because he realized what she was showing him.
A small tattoo of a wolf’s head.
“I got this when I was twelve.”
His heart started pounding again. “Twelve? Your parents gave permission for—”
“I didn’t have parents, Jay. And, no, I didn’t ask the people I was living with if it was all right. The man who did it didn’t care about my age, just that I paid him in cash. Do—do you think Wolf knows about the tattoo?”
“Maybe.”
Chapter Ten
A sigh of relief nearly escaped Winter as Jay and she reached Potlatch. She now regretted showing him the tattoo and saying what she had about not having parents. In only a few words she’d exposed two deeply personal things to a man she’d recently met. Granted, she hadn’t given him details, but she’d be surprised if he didn’t want them.
She couldn’t do anything about his curiosity. That didn’t mean she owed him more than she’d given him.
He touched her sleeve. “Is there someone you want to talk to about what happened?”
Who? “I’m numb.”
“That’s probably good, but I’m surprised you haven’t made other calls.”
Her head throbbed. “I’m sure my coworkers know. News like that gets around.”
“What about friends, relatives, a lover?”
In addition to Carolyn, there were several women she hiked with, two other new hires she met for Friday night drinks, the sixty-something widow who was her closest neighbor. She’d already told Jay all she intended to about her lack of a family. As for a lover, she hadn’t dated in the better part of a year.
“I’m all right.” She worked up a semblance of a smile. “Don’t worry about me.”
“But I do.”
“I appreciate your concern.” She couldn’t look him in the eyes. Between the words and quiet tone, she had to fight tears. Damn it, years ago she’d learned to keep her emotions hidden. The lessons should be ingrained. “Right now, I feel as if I’m wrapped in cotton.”
“That won’t last.”
“I know.”
She thought he might touch her again, and when he didn’t, she was torn between relief and disappointment. When she spotted the path leading to Doc’s cabin, she started down it. Jay followed close behind.
Still walking, she looked over her shoulder at him. “I didn’t thank you for making it possible for me to leave where…everything was closing in on me.”
He indicated the sky-hiding trees. “This isn’t exactly an open space so I understand what you’re talking about. What do you want to do now?”
“I keep replaying what Booth said about needing back the library material. I won’t touch anything in the cabin, but I’d like to take another look at what Doc had borrowed.”
“I’m glad you realize law enforcement needs to go through the cabin’s contents. Saves me from pointing out the obvious.”
Beyond the warped door now only a few feet away lay much of what had been important to Doc. A fresh wave of disbelief overtook her. Why was it so difficult to acknowledge the word murder?
“Are you sure you’re up to this?” Jay asked.
“I don’t have a choice. I need to assure Pearson that his father’s personal belongings are safe.”
“I’ll stay with you until you get it over with.”
Supported by his words, she squared her shoulders and, as Jay had done yesterday, pushed against the door. It swung open. At first, she couldn’t see anything of the interior, but
then her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting.
Empty. Not completely, but close. She stared, simply stared as she struggled to wrap her mind around what she was seeing. It was all too much. First, Doc had been killed, and now—
“What the hell?”
Jay’s shock echoed hers. She wiped suddenly sweaty palms on her jeans. Someone had walked into Doc’s domain, picked up his belongings and stolen everything of importance. He or she had left Doc’s sleeping bag, the cereal on the counter and his clothes, but precious little else. The books, the papers—gone. Nothing remained of what he’d borrowed from the park library, but that didn’t bother her nearly as much as the empty space where his laptop had been. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up.
“Jay?” It hurt to talk. “Maybe law enforcement rangers—but I don’t get it. Why would they clear out his place so soon?”
“It wasn’t rangers.”
It took Jay’s words for reality to sink in. Maybe whoever had killed her mentor had taken everything connected to his grant work. Maybe the theft was the work of an opportunist. The Hoh and other Natives hadn’t wanted Doc around. It could have been any one or more of them. Maybe she was letting her initial reaction to Booth’s bluster get to her, but, at this point, she couldn’t dismiss anyone—including Michael, who impressed her as primarily looking out for himself.
Booth or Michael, killers?
“Don’t touch anything,” Jay said. “I need to call Christian.”
Of course he did. A crime had been committed. It was as simple as that. And it had happened less than twenty-four hours ago.
Jay placed his hands on her shoulders. Her sense of having being violated eased a little, and she leaned back toward him.
“We need to get out of here,” he said. “Can you walk?”
“Yes. Thank you for asking.” His touch made it possible for her to fight the urge to run for safety. The slippers she’d given Doc last Christmas peeking out from under his bed were so ordinary.
“Why?” she muttered when Jay and she were back on the path. Shadows surrounded them. The guilty party could be watching. “What were they looking for?”
“Your guess is as good as mine.”
Her lips went numb, and she made no attempt to continue the conversation. He stared down at her for too long, then withdrew his radio from his belt and activated it.
“Christian,” he said in response to a faint hello. “It’s Jay Raven. Where are you? Already? You made good time. Look, we’ve got a problem at Potlatch.”
She listened, and yet she didn’t, as Jay spelled out what they’d discovered. He’d handle everything, say what needed to be said, answer the investigator’s questions. All she had to do was start feeling again. Only she didn’t want to.
“Christian is with the others at—you know where he is,” Jay told her after completing his conversation. “He isn’t sure when he can get down here but is sending a couple rangers this way. In the meantime, he charged me with making sure no one goes inside.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she whispered. “The damage has been done. Doc’s laptop is gone. I’m certain his notes on what he’s been doing here are in there, to say nothing of his lecture and reference materials going back years.” She closed her eyes in an attempt to get through what she needed to tell Jay. “That’s also where he keeps pictures of his grandchildren.” No matter that Doc was dead, she’d spoken of him in the present tense. Maybe he’d always remain alive in her mind.
“Are you saying everything he’d been compiling about this area’s history was in one place?”
She opened her eyes. Instead of the criticism she half-expected to see in his expression, she noted a slight sagging to his shoulders and took that as proof of how tired he was. Unlike her, however, he had reserves of strength to draw on. She couldn’t imagine him being afraid.
“Unfortunately, yes.” How long had it taken her to respond? “He loves—loved—that old laptop. He called it his personal workhorse. It has tons of memory. All his class notes are in it.”
“What about backup?”
“Oh, I’m sure he did that.” Damn it, she had to concentrate. Function. “I asked him about that. He said not to worry.”
Jay looked at the closed cabin door. “Whoever it was didn’t miss anything. I didn’t see any of those memory stick things. He couldn’t have used a remote storage service, because there’s no Internet reception within the forest.”
“He told me that.”
She hadn’t opened any drawers or gone through Doc’s personal belongings, which meant maybe the thief hadn’t found Doc’s backup.
She looked at Jay, not wanting any of this to be happening.
“You’ve been thrown a new curve,” he said. “Are you sure there isn’t someone you can call?”
“It’s all right.” She forced a laugh. “I’ve heard of thieves who break in while people are at the funeral, but this—”
“Is that what you believe happened?”
“Right now I can’t answer. Point me in the direction of a shower and something to eat, and I’ll be…” She’d been going to say she’d be good as new, but that was a lie. Just the idea of being alone made her uneasy when she seldom felt that way. “A shower first.”
“I get the sense you don’t want to talk about this, but I’m going to ask anyway. Are your parents dead? What about siblings?”
Suddenly, her pack felt as if it weighed a hundred pounds. Even more disconcerting, she was getting lightheaded. “I don’t know.”
“You what?”
She started to shrug, then swayed. The questions had come out of left field and were more than she could deal with right now.
When he stepped behind her, she couldn’t muster the strength to determine what he had in mind. When he pulled the pack off her shoulders, she sighed in relief.
“It’s all right if you cry. You don’t have to prove anything to me.”
Didn’t she? Seeking the answer, she spun around and watched as he shrugged out of his own pack. They had been through so much since they’d met. Granted, only she’d had to deal with the emotional component, but he’d been part of everything. He’d seen her raw and emotionally naked. In some ways, he got her better than she did herself right now.
“I don’t know how to cry.” Tears burned her eyes, built, but didn’t release.
He held out his hands. “I don’t believe you.”
“I have a hell of a defense mechanism.”
“Which you need why?”
Why couldn’t she keep her mouth shut around him? “Don’t play shrink on me. It won’t work.”
“This isn’t a battle, Winter. I want to help.”
Help. Even Doc hadn’t attempted to reach beyond the barrier she’d erected around herself. Now she wanted to tell someone about the holes in her. She placed her hands in his. He drew her close. Lowered his head.
She lifted hers. Touched her mouth to his.
Hopefully no one was around, but even if someone had been, it wouldn’t have changed things. Moments ago, responsibility and grief had weighed on her. Now, she became weightless, floated above mortal concerns.
Her body felt as if it were flowing into this strong, competent, compassionate and physical man. The lines between their separate selves were being sanded away, barriers breaking down. Wrapping her arms around Jay’s waist, she pressed herself against him. He was so tall that continuing the kiss had her off balance, but that was all right. He’d keep her safe.
“Damn,” he muttered.
When he made no move to draw away, she held on even tighter.
“Winter.”
She reluctantly pushed back. When she was free, she stood staring up at him, with her arms heavy at her sides and disbelief enveloping her. What had she done?
Not just her, both of them.
“You need more than a shower and something to eat,” he said on the tail of an awkward silence, “but those things are a start. It’ll help you get your emotional equi
librium back.”
He was right, of course. More than right—he’d become her lifeline. She hated feeling so vulnerable right now, and yet there wasn’t much she could do about it until a little time had passed.
“I’m tired of hurting,” she admitted, as if that explained her eagerness to press her mouth, her body against him.
“Of course you are. When my parents died—it was bad.”
“It had to be.”
“But I got past it,” he said. “So will you.”
She rested her right hand over where the wolf tattoo lay. “I want to make sense of why Doc was killed and his cabin ransacked. I can’t help the investigation if I can’t get past how Doc’s murder impacts me.”
“So you’re staying.”
Staying. Letting the forest envelop me. Listening and longing for another howl. Asking myself if I belong here. Maybe finally feeling whole. Connected. “For now.”
“Is helping law enforcement the only reason?”
She focused on Doc’s cabin. “No.”
“That’s what I thought you’d say, and I get your commitment to your friend, but it might not be safe.” He drew her hand away from the tattoo and placed her palm against his ribs. “There’s a killer out there. Maybe the same person ransacked Dr. Gilsdorf’s cabin.”
Her hand rose and fell with his breathing. Close. Warm and alive. “Are you trying to scare me?”
“No. Of course not, but you shouldn’t stay where you might be in danger.”
Because I have the wolf mask? The thought broke the spell, prompting her to pull free and back away. As soon as she did, she regretted her action. “I appreciate your concern, and I need to consider that possibility, but I’m dealing with more than just what happened to Doc.”
“Wolf.”
“Yes, Wolf.”
His expression became darker. “I can’t tell you how to handle that. I wish I could, but—Winter, Christian needs to talk to you, which means you have to spend at least tonight here.”
Near you. “Yes.”
“You’ll need a place to stay. I might have a solution. There’s a cabin not far from the one I use. For years, it was reserved for summer staff, but with the cutbacks… Anyway, there’s a shower in it.”