“Yeah. I guess. Still… Next time, warn me when you’re intent on mass slaughter,” she grumbled. “I seriously did not know where to look.”
“Neither did your mother,” Ryan teased. “Which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Her flirting definitely toned itself down a notch then, didn’t it?”
She rolled her eyes. “I guess I should be thankful for small mercies. She’ll flirt like hell with you when you’re my boyfriend, but deigns to tone it down when she knows you’re going to be my husband.” She huffed. “It’s a wonder she hasn’t come on to you, Shawn. She always knew how much I liked you.”
Shit. If the conversation could have gone anywhere, he’d have wished like fuck it hadn’t gone down that particular track.
Speechless for a moment, and utterly uncertain of what to say, he just kept quiet, hoping beyond hope that the conversation would veer off and head somewhere else.
When it didn’t, and when silence continued to overwhelm the cab, with it, a looming sense of rage from El’s part, he wished like fuck he could roll into a ball and never come out.
This was not going to go down well.
“Shawn?”
Her voice was deadly. So cold, and so rammed with icicles, the single syllable sound of his name tore through him like a sharp dagger.
“Yeah?” he asked gruffly.
“Did she come onto you?”
The poisoned words had him tensing up behind the wheel. He pulled off onto the road that would take them to the compound, and with the traffic far less dense, caught her gaze in the mirror and said, “A few times.”
He could feel the other guys glancing at one another, wondering what the fuck was going on, and could understand why they were staying out of this. This was his war, not theirs.
It wasn’t them pushing him out into the cold because he was the odd one out. He knew that, so wasn’t offended. He just wished like hell they’d try to change the subject.
Although, maybe they sensed like he did that that wasn’t going to happen.
El had grabbed a hold of this particular topic and she wasn’t letting go.
“A few times?” she whispered softly, but it wasn’t out of a need to lower her voice. More like she couldn’t control the volume at all.
“Yes,” he confirmed roughly. He wouldn’t lie to her. Even if lies would serve him better. And there was no way that this conversation was ever going to go well.
“And did you act on those ‘few times’?”
Because the question was loaded with a world of hurt this time, not just female rage, he indicated to pull in and braked to a halt on the side of the road a mile or so away from the compound.
From his vantage point, he could even see the weird turret Pride House had atop its roof. The creepy tower reminded him of a fancied-up Gomez and Morticia Addams mansion. He half turned in his seat, using the wheel to keep him in place so he could see her, process her reaction.
The look in her eyes was something he’d never forget, and he wished like hell there was another answer he could give her, but the truth hurt for a reason and he didn’t want to start out this new section of their life with lies.
That is if this ‘section’ lasted once he revealed the truth. Of course, after what Ryan had showed him the other day, he knew what they had wasn’t something that could simply be thrown away.
Thanking God for that particular truth, he murmured, “Yes.” When she sucked in a sharp breath, he quickly stated, “It was a long time ago.”
“You think that makes it okay?” she demanded, her voice hoarse now. The betrayal etched onto her face felt like a knife to the heart.
“No, of course not, but it was a different time. I was a different person, El. You have to understand that. It was way back in the beginning.”
“You fucked my mom. You think something like that has an expiration date?” she spat. Then, shaking her head, she turned to Trip who was at her side and asked, “I need to get out of the SUV.”
Shawn’s eyes widened. “No! You have to stay in the car, El. For your own safety. I’ll get out. One of the others can come back for me.”
El sliced a hand through the air. “I need to get out of this SUV right this instant, and if you don’t fucking let me out, I’ll open the goddamn sunroof and climb out through there.”
The deadly hiss had him narrowing his eyes. “Then that’s what you’ll have to do. For your own safety, you have to stay in this vehicle.”
She let out a yell, one loaded with impotent rage, and reaching up, began to scrabble with the sunroof settings.
He reached over to stop her, trying to grab her hand to halt her foolishness, but when his fingers connected with her wrist, she let out a shriek. “Get your fucking hands off me!”
“El! Calm down,” Trip’s voice oozed command, and Shawn shot him a surprised glance. The computer nerd always seemed pretty chilled when it came to anything other than his work—he’d watched the guy powerhouse through hours’ worth of admin yesterday evening, just so he could spend the night with El uninterrupted by any calls his team might place to him.
“I can’t calm down,” she raged. “Get me out of the fucking SUV!”
“Ryan, calm her down, dammit. This isn’t good for her,” Marc demanded.
Ryan grabbed her shoulders, stared her in the eye, and stated, “Relax, baby. Relax.”
She’d been vibrating with her rage. Her body humming with a tension that he’d created in her. Shame and misery filled him at the sight of the beautiful woman he’d loved for so long shaking with hatred for him. He closed his eyes a second, then when he opened them El was far less tense but still brimming with emotion.
“What the fuck did you just do to her? Fucking mesmerize her?” Well, mesmerize was a bit strong. She was still furious; he could see it in her eyes. But she wasn’t trying to tear the sun roof off anymore.
Ryan shot him a warning look as he opened the door to the SUV and climbed out. “Come on, sweetheart,” he told her softly, ignoring Shawn’s angry words. “Let’s get some fresh air.”
She wasn’t ‘mesmerized’ enough to not shoot him a glare as she got out of the car, though. He watched, heart aching, as she used Ryan’s arms for support as she jumped down from the vehicle’s not insubstantial height.
Marc clamped a hand on Shawn’s arm when he made to open the door and get out too. “Ryan can keep her safe. Not only would he never put her in any danger, he’s primed and pumped. She’ll come to no harm with him at her side.”
“They’re sitting ducks,” he argued. “Walking on the side of the road the way they are, anyone could target them.”
“Yeah, they could, and anyone would come to regret it when a half-ton of pissed off Lion came at their throats,” Trip told him unconcernedly. He peered out of the back window as Ryan guided El onto the sidewalk, and tucking her hand through his arm, they began a gently paced walk toward the compound in the distance.
“Fuck,” he raged, slamming his fists into the steering wheel before him. How had that conversation gone so goddamn wrong? “Motherfucker!”
His fit glanced off the horn and the sound pierced through the air making Trip and Marc jump. About twenty feet away now, Ryan and El did too, and Ryan turned around to glower at him before concentrating on El once more.
Shawn could see his lips were moving, constantly, and he knew Ryan was soothing her. Trying to keep her calm.
That was his job.
He should have been the one to make this fucked up situation better. Not Ryan.
He had no idea how this mate bond was supposed to work. This wasn’t his world. He’d heard about mate bonds from the guys in his battalion. Knew of them, but that didn’t make any of it make sense. It just took away the surprise. They’d discussed mate bonds with a hesitancy rarely found in brutal conversations held on the battle front.
If there was a place where honesty was required, it was when you were about to head into a FUBAR situation where you might not come out alive.
El looked like she was in a constant state of shock at the moment as more and more of the relationship she was involved in was revealed to her.
Though he’d never expected to have anything with El, and was grateful to be included in this mate bond, it didn’t make it any easier.
The three Triad brothers were well at ease with their place, their roles, in El’s life. Whereas he, accustomed to the notion of a one-on-one relationship with a woman, felt superfluous.
Maybe Marc sensed that, because he said softly, “We’ll settle into our proper places soon.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he demanded, shooting the man a glower. Marc was more chilled than Trip, but there was an air about him… an air that was distinctly ‘old’.
Not that he looked it. He looked younger than Shawn, truth be told. But that wasn’t true. He spoke with a sagacity that only came with having seen many years on this plane, and as a result, Shawn knew he should listen, even if he didn’t have to like the words being spoken.
“We’re all at sea here,” Marc told him softly, his eyes trained on El’s back. “We wouldn’t have been if it weren’t for you. You’re a definite spanner in the works, but El’s bound to you in ways that we’re used to seeing from the female of our kind… Adapting to that will take its time. Until then, we’ll find our place. And we’ll all earn certain roles with her. At this moment, Ryan is what she needs. As leader of the Pride, he has certain talents that will allow him to keep her calm.”
“What was that about?” he demanded. “It was like he hypnotized her or something?”
“No. It wasn’t hypnosis. He just calmed her down.” Marc wrinkled his nose. “He took on some of her emotion so she wouldn’t act irrationally. They’ll walk back to the compound and she’ll go to sleep—not because of anything he did to her. He didn’t mesmerize her like you said. He just eased her pain. He’ll take her to bed though. What he did can be quite draining for both of them. Hopefully, when she wakes, she’ll feel better. If not, you may be in the doghouse for a while.”
Shawn sighed. “No less than I deserve. It happened a long time ago, but that doesn’t change the fact I fucked her mom.”
Trip cleared his throat. “You do know how fucked up that is, right?”
He grunted. “Of course I do, idiot. It was a long time ago though. Back when El was still half-kid half-woman. Annabel didn’t look like Frankenstein back then. She was beautiful. Probably still would be if she hadn’t had so much surgery.” He sighed, scraped a hand through his hair. “I’d just gotten out. Active duty wasn’t even a distant memory. Some nights it was like I was back in a war zone. She came onto me, we fucked. It helped me sleep.” He shrugged. “It died a death because we both got bored. Plus, I had to move. I’d been on the perimeter, mostly. But then El pulled that stunt with her school, where she refused to return, and she moved to live with her grandparents. Maybe her father knew I was fucking his wife and sent me away because of that…? I don’t even know. He could have fired me, but I’m too good at what I do for that. He’d have been losing a good bodyguard. Guys with my record and past are hard to find. So, anyway, I was assigned to El’s detail and I’ve been there ever since.”
“And how long have you loved her?”
“Since she was twenty-four.” He closed his eyes at the memories that assailed him.
Jesus, that had been a fucked up time.
Hell, when hadn’t El’s life been one long round of fucked up though?
In so many ways, he felt for her. She didn’t deserve the shit that rained on her every goddamn day. But that was her lot in life.
Before he’d come to work for her family, he’d figured, just like everyone else, that the one percent lived a life of ease and comfort. That their money cushioned them from the harsh realities of the real world.
And though, in many ways, that was true, it also wasn’t.
Sure, they got to wear fancy designer gear and had houses in exclusive areas, but not one part of their day was their own.
They were monitored and watched, protected and guarded. They were driven places in bullet-proofed cars, and couldn’t even walk down the street without having security surround them. Their lives were not their own.
It sucked. He knew that now. El, though she was unlike her family, suffered more than most because she didn’t particularly want the money.
Sure, he knew everyone could say that when they had it, but it wasn’t like that.
The sheer quantities El had at her fingertips was beyond obscene.
Her wealth was the same as a small, developing nation’s GDP, for fuck’s sake. No one person should have that kind of money. And El’s family agreed with that.
She didn’t even have them at her back.
Everyone wanted a piece of her. Everyone.
Trip broke into his memories with a soft, “What happened when she was twenty-four?”
He sank into the driver’s seat, but he looped his hands on the wheel, gripping tightly onto the hard rubber. “You’ve both slept with her now.” And how those words hurt. Had they both fucked her? Marc had slept with her often enough for that to be a possibility. Trip had spent the past few nights with her too… If he had their senses, he’d have been able to scent her on them, or vice versa. He wasn’t sure whether to be grateful over the fact his nose was just a regular goddamn nose. He cleared his throat and stated, “You know she doesn’t like to sleep alone, right?”
Marc blinked, but nodded. Trip just frowned. “I didn’t know that.”
Marc shot Trip a look. “She told me that first night. Said she slept in a single back at her place?”
Shawn nodded when Trip scoffed and stated, “No way. Who sleeps in a single when they’re older than twelve? She said the bed was too big… not that she sleeps in a single. Jesus.”
“She does,” he confirmed. “She sleeps badly most nights anyway. Back then, I used to have a day off every ten days. I don’t anymore. El doesn’t like it, so she makes sure we chill out and do something together that she knows I enjoy.” His lips twitched. “She hates baseball but we have season tickets because of her. In fact, we have a box at the Rangers, and standing front row seats at the Lakers, again because of her.” He laughed. “There’s me, roaring my lungs out while she does Sudoku or listens to an audiobook. She hates that I don’t have free time, but I’m not leaving her. Never again.”
His strident tone had Marc blinking. “Explain.”
“That night… I’m watching a game, it’s my day off, and someone breaks into the perimeter, gets through all our security, and makes it into her bedroom. She’s fast asleep, and they wake her up and knock her out with chloroform. They abduct her. Take her to a secure location, make their demands. She’s asleep through all of it. Her father paid the ransom as soon as the bastards sent over notice of their demands, didn’t involve the cops, and we were given her location and told we could collect her.” His jaw worked.
“The minute I heard she’d been abducted, I rushed back to base. I was there for it all, and the waiting, the fucking waiting, that was the hardest part. I was scared shitless something would happen to her. That the bastards wouldn’t let her go, that they’d kill her. Or, that one ransom demand wouldn’t be enough. They’d demand more, and more. Milk a cow that could afford to keep on giving.” He sucked in a shuddery breath. “I have no idea why they didn’t, but like I said, they gave us her location and I was the one who found her.” He gritted his teeth at the memory.
“She was on this dirty fucking mattress in the dark. Unconscious. Limp. I thought she was dead at first, but then she moaned. The chloroform was starting to wear off, and I moved as quickly as I could because the last thing I wanted was her waking up in that shithole. As I moved, she just… El was wearing one of her nightgowns. They’re like something from the Victorian era. They cover her up from neck to toe, and they’re white linen. She looked like a ghost at that moment. It scared me. Shit, worse. It terrified the fuck out of me, and I kept my eyes train
ed on her mouth, making sure she was breathing.
“I couldn’t seem to process that she was still alive. It wasn’t sinking in. As I took her out of that Godforsaken building, she was so goddamn still in my arms, it scared the life out of me. Then, when I got her into the SUV, she started to wake up again. It was like, before, when she’d started to stir, she’d known I was there. Known it deep in her bones, and had managed to relax because she knew she was safe.” He sucked in a juddery breath. “When she awoke properly, I was there with her. We were in the hospital by that point, and her eyes, when they opened, connected with mine. Before anyone else. Like I was the only one who mattered. It felt like that,” he whispered.
“Maybe that’s how it was. She’s obviously not close to her family,” Marc said softly.
Shawn nodded, the memories still flooding him, still having the power to hurt him. “I knew at that moment that I loved her. That I’d do anything to keep her safe, to protect her. Even if it meant dedicating every single one of my fucking days to making sure that what happened that night never happened again. And until Saturday night, it hasn’t.”
Trip’s hand landed on Shawn’s shoulder, jolting him a little. The other man squeezed, then tightened his hold to the point of pain. “The Mother works in mysterious ways, Shawn. Maybe she knew it was time for you to chill out. It can’t have been good for you; always being on guard. Now, you don’t have to. We’re going to take good care of her, but more than that, we’re going to go to the root source. We’re going to find out what the fuck is going on with El’s past. Because something has to be. Rich people are targets, sure. But as badly as El? I don’t think so.”
Though he could feel relief at sharing the burden of El’s safety with three men who were not only older, undoubtedly wiser, and could turn into a fucking Lion at will, he knew it would take many years before he dared lower his guard.
He felt certain he’d been born to keep her safe, and that’s exactly what he wanted to do.
Finding Luna: A Lion Shifter Reverse Harem Romance (PRIDE Book 1) Page 17