by Wendy Wax
“Looking for these?” He handed her the bottle of Tylenol and a glass of water. “I managed to get some down your throat last night,” he said. “But I’m guessing your head is pounding like a bass drum about now.”
Furious that he was right, she washed the pills down with a long drink of water. He went into the bathroom and came out with a towel knotted at his hip.
“Coffee’ll be ready in a minute. We can go out for breakfast if you’d like. Or . . .” He waggled his eyebrows. “We can go back to bed. I don’t have to be on-site until ten. Or maybe you could take me by and show me the Wyatt build. I’d love to see it.”
She looked at her phone then back up at his shit-eating grin. It was almost eight. “I really don’t understand what happened here,” she said, though it was becoming way too clear.
“Well, I could draw you a picture but . . .”
“I mean why you’re here. And why we . . .” She couldn’t bring herself to say it and she definitely didn’t want to see any pictures of it. The satisfied thrum of her body indicated there was no chance of denying it.
“What can I say? You called and invited me over. In fact, the invitation was so graphic I’m pretty sure it made me blush. But as booty calls go it was damned persuasive.”
“Booty call.” She repeated the words dully. “You came over here for the specific purpose of having sex with me even though it was obvious I’d been drinking and might not be in my right mind.”
“Well, if memory serves, that’s how booty calls generally work.”
“We had sex because I called you while I was drunk. And asked for it?” She was going to have to have a talk with Bitsy. What was the point of walking an inebriated friend home and not confiscating a weapon as potentially dangerous as a cell phone? Friends shouldn’t let friends dial drunk.
Chase nodded. “I’m too much of a gentleman to use the word ‘beg,’ but I did my best to resist. You were pretty insistent.”
“Oh, God.” She pulled the sheet higher and wished she could simply disappear beneath it.
“Be right back.”
He went to the kitchen to pour coffee while Avery tried to remember making the call, but the only images she came up with were of the sexual gymnastics that had ensued. When he returned she took the coffee he offered, but only because she needed it so desperately. He looked way too comfortable for her liking.
“I’m surprised you were willing to come serve as my plaything,” she said tersely. “Given that you’ve taken such an all-or-nothing position.”
He searched her face. The smile she’d found so annoying flickered out. “Look, Avery. I came because I was worried about you. I figured I’d make sure you were okay and tuck you into bed.” He shrugged. “But you weren’t having it. You’re a hard woman to say no to. Then you admitted you missed me and wanted me back in your life.”
“I said that?”
“Well, only after you called Riley Hancock a number of names that I don’t think bear repeating. But then you told me that you loved me, that you always had and always would. I assumed that meant you were ready to take the next step.”
Now that the smile was gone she wished she could put it back, but the words that would do that stuck in her throat. “I do love you, Chase. That’s not in question. And I’m sorry if you think I called under false pretenses. I hated seeing you with someone else. And I miss you more than I can say.” She swallowed. “But it’s taken me all this time to get used to being alone again. I didn’t just lose you, I lost your dad and the boys. You were my family. I don’t think I could survive that again. That’s why I feel like we need to move more slowly. To be safe.”
Chase sighed, shook his head. “Safe? In my experience, love isn’t safe or predictable. Neither is life. There are no guarantees.” He stood, his hands on his hips. “We’ve known each other since we were kids. We’ve lived together. We love each other. I’m sorry as hell that I shut you out. But I don’t know how to prove future behavior to you. And I don’t see how a couple weeks or months of dating are going to make a difference. There’s a leap of faith required here, Avery. You either trust me and believe in us. Or you don’t.”
Her heart thudded dully in her chest. She understood his words, could even see the truth in them. But the fear she felt was real, the leap required too great.
“Right.” He took a step away from the bed. “Got it.” He gave her one last look. “I’m going to take a quick shower and then I’ll get out of your way.”
He came out of the bathroom wearing jeans and a T-shirt, his hair still damp from the shower. He barely paused as he strode through the bedroom. “You take care.”
When she went into the living room to microwave the coffee that had grown cold in the cup, the key she’d given him was sitting on the dinette. She sat down on the sofa and stared numbly out the window. But she was in no mood for sunshine.
* * *
• • •
When Maddie arrived at Bud n’ Mary’s Marina that afternoon, Hudson Power was waiting for her. She smiled as he walked over to give her a hug and take her suitcase, but she was unable to stop herself from looking around him.
“Will’s back at Mermaid Point making himself presentable.”
“Presentable?”
“Yeah. We went out to Cape Sable early Monday morning for an impromptu camping and fishing trip. We just got back about thirty minutes ago.” Hud handed her into the boat he’d taught her to drive, stowed her suitcase, and started up the engine.
“Did you have a good time?”
“It wasn’t the most fun I’ve ever had, no,” he said as he backed the boat out of the slip then putted out of the marina. “He couldn’t finish the damned song he was working on. Got all grumpy-assed. He was lucky I didn’t leave him out there.”
With the marina behind them Hud increased their speed. Within minutes they were skimming across the turquoise water, the wind whipping Maddie’s hair. She smiled as she inhaled the salt air. The lack of cell service on and around the isolated beach they’d camped on explained why Will hadn’t returned her call. What it didn’t explain was if he’d be glad to see her.
As they rounded the mangrove-shrouded island and approached the Mermaid Point dock, the nerves she’d been shoving aside during the drive down from Pass-a-Grille reasserted themselves. She’d turned tail and run like some deer startled out of the bush without thinking why she was running, where she was headed, or what consequences she might face when she returned. And now she was about to find out what kind of damage she’d done.
Hud walked her into the foyer of the main house and set her suitcase beside her feet. There was a sound at the top of the stairs and she looked up to see Will. As always, her heart swelled at the sight of him. His dark hair hung damp to his broad shoulders, which were encased in a plain white T-shirt. The sharp planes and angles of his face stretched beneath newly bronzed skin. His dark eyes gave nothing away as he came down to join them.
“So, a fishing trip, huh?” Maddie hoped her smile didn’t look as uncertain as she felt. “How was the catch?”
Will’s smile was friendly enough as he greeted her, but his eyes remained guarded and his hug was nothing like the one he’d bestowed the last time she’d arrived. Nor did he seem inclined to drag her upstairs for a “nap.”
“It would have been better if Hud had ever stopped talking,” he said. “I keep waiting for him to realize that fishing guides are men of few words. But Hud here feels compelled to spout all kinds of nonsense. Scared away most of the fish. The ones we caught threw themselves on the hook just to get him to shut up.”
“Ha!” Hud replied. “I wouldn’t have had to talk so much if you would’ve stopped moping.”
“I wasn’t moping, I was thinking. There’s a difference.” Will glared at his old friend.
Lori appeared from the first-floor office. “You came back!” She threw her
arms around Maddie. “Thank God,” she said as she let go. “We were all afraid that . . .”
“You can go now,” Will said, expanding the glare to include the young woman. He made a shooing motion at the two of them. When they took off, he gestured toward the open glass at the rear of the great room. “I think the pavilion’s empty. Feel like sitting outside?”
She tried not to notice how formally he’d made the request. As if she were a guest and he the courteous host. She followed him outside and into the shade of the open-air building that he’d had rebuilt after Irma. It was an almost exact replica of the original where Dustin had first shared a smooshed PB&J with the rock star who had so intimidated her. He pulled two cans of lemonade out of the refrigerator of the updated version of the outdoor kitchen where they’d once cooked together on camera. This place, this whole island, was filled with the memories of their meeting and what became their relationship. Her horror at what she’d done rose up in a tidal wave of regret that threatened to swamp her.
“I’m so sorry I left the way I did,” she said without thought or plan. “I really don’t know what came over me. I mean part of it was worry about Kyra and Dustin and I am glad I was there for them but . . .” She paused for breath, but nothing could halt the words that flew out of wherever she’d stuffed them. “I don’t know. For some reason I . . . I guess I just kind of panicked.” She winced. “And then when you didn’t return my call I thought maybe you were so mad you didn’t even want to talk to me.”
He studied her face then scrubbed a large hand over his own. “Yeah, well, I didn’t even take my cell phone with me. I just picked up the message when we got back.” He stared out over the crescent-shaped beach, but she doubted he was watching the small seabirds running around on their matchstick legs.
“I’m not going to lie,” he finally said. “I didn’t like it when you ran off and left me that way.”
“I didn’t mean to,” she said honestly. “It took me half the week to realize I was running. And the other half to even understand a little bit of what made me do it.”
“Well, I hope to hell you’re planning to enlighten me,” he said gruffly. “Because I tried swimming, fishing, and camping. And you know those three things have gotten me through a lot of shit. But you? I never expected you to mess with my head like that.”
“I know.” She could barely swallow around the emotion clogging her throat. But she owed it to both of them to try to explain. “I’ve never been into drama myself. And I never expected to fall in love a second time in my life. And you’re not exactly the sort of man a woman like me expects to find herself involved with.”
“This is sounding way too much like the kind of ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ that ends in good-bye.” His tone was dry, but she could see him bracing.
“No,” she said quickly, reaching for his hand. “That’s not the way I mean it. But I, well, it’s one thing when we’re alone together and we’re just us, you know? But I think I’m afraid of what it’s going to feel like on tour. What other people will think. How you’ll see me compared to all the women you could have instead of me.” His hand was large and warm, his gaze steady. He deserved total honesty even if it revealed the mess of insecurity that had been bubbling inside her. “And I sucked at hanging out doing nothing here. I’m not at all sure how I’ll handle that when we’re in a different city practically every day and I have no defined role or responsibilities. I’m even worried about whether I’ll still be me.”
When she finished, he reached a hand out to cup her cheek. “Personally, I don’t care what the rest of the world thinks. I’ve been through enough to recognize the real thing when I find it. And you’re it. I don’t want to get over you, Maddie. I don’t.” He looked her in the eye, looked all the way inside her. “I hope like hell you don’t want me to, either. But I will if I have to.”
He gave her hand a final squeeze and trailed the fingers of his other hand down her cheek. What came next would be up to her.
She drew a deep breath of salt-tinged air into her lungs and continued to meet his eyes. Her heart felt too big for her chest. “Well, as you unfortunately just heard, I seem to have a high degree of uncertainty about who I am, what I want, and even, oddly, whether I might somehow cease to be me.” She smiled with trembling lips. “But one thing I have no question or qualms about is you. I love you, Will. Truly and deeply. And no matter what happens, I suspect I always will.” She felt the prickle of tears. Saw his face through their sheen. “I’m so sorry that I hurt you. You seem so strong, you’ve survived so much that sometimes I think I forget that you can still be hurt. I hope you can forgive me.” She swallowed, but there was no holding back the tears. “If you still want me to come with you tomorrow, and I hope that you do, I’m in. If there’s a problem or a question, we’ll talk about it. I’m in it for the long haul.” Her smile grew and as full as it was, her heart felt so light, she thought it might sprout wings. Tears slipped down her cheeks and she swiped at them with the back of her hand. “In fact, I’m going to be just like Tom Cruise in Top Gun. No matter what happens, I’ll be there. I will not leave my wingman.”
Twenty-one
“You go relax and get pampered. Treat yourself to that mani-pedi, and let them blow out your hair. Maybe even have a massage so you’ll feel at your best when Mr. Giraldi returns this evening,” Luvie said to Nikki.
“Yes, well, I have all that scheduled but not until . . .”
Luvie didn’t wait for Nikki to point out that she had several hours before those appointments, but escorted her to the door of the cottage and ushered her out of her own home. Without a squeak of protest from Sofia or Gemma.
She stood on the porch, the closed door at her back, wondering how she had ended up outside and where, exactly, she was supposed to go now.
She’d already taken the girls in the stroller for a run that morning. She’d also already eaten the two-egg-white omelet with a quarter cup of spinach and a pinch of feta, so when she entered the Sunshine’s main building she was careful not to breathe in the intoxicating scents of French toast or chocolate chip pancakes, both of which were apparently being served with warm maple syrup.
Bitsy stood in the gift shop. An iced cinnamon bun sat on the counter next to a whipped-cream-covered cappuccino. Nikki’s stomach grumbled with longing.
“Where are Sofia and Gemma?” Bitsy asked, taking a bite of the warm flaky pastry then licking icing off her fingers. Nikki’s mouth watered.
“Luvie came in early and my hair appointment isn’t until one. I know she means well, at least I assume she does, but . . . do you think the Bankses would have figured things out themselves if Mary Poppins hadn’t come along?”
“Mary Poppins and the Banks family are fictional. You and Luvie are flesh and blood. Personally, I think you should enjoy the help and find something worthwhile to do with your free time. But then I’ve never had children and grew up spending more time with servants than family members, so my thinking may be slightly skewed.”
“Right.” Nikki turned her back so that she wouldn’t have to watch Bitsy take another bite of the cinnamon bun. “I love the way the vintage bathing suits look there.”
“Yeah. One of the ladies over in the mah-jongg game asked about the price of the teal Rose Marie Reid. She said she used to have one like it and thought it might make a fun gift for her daughter.”
Nikki winced at the reminder of her promise to research prices. It seemed the less she did the less she was inclined to do. “Sorry. I totally forgot. I promise to have pricing by Monday.” In no hurry to go out and kill time or add on to her grooming appointments, she studied the space. A pyramid of aqua-colored luggage had been piled in a corner. “Where did those come from?”
“Avery brought them in—Martha Wyatt is downsizing and she found the set in the attic. I’m not sure what we should do with them, but I think they’re really cool.”
Nikki l
ifted the smallest piece, a lightweight train case with rounded corners, and set it on the counter. It was covered in some sort of stain-resistant material. The clasp and trim were brass. “It’s Lady Baltimore.” She pointed to the delicately scripted brass letters. “It was really popular in the sixties.” She released the clasp and lifted the top. The past wafted out as she leaned closer to examine the aqua silk lining with its faint floral pattern. “I’ll figure out what we might sell them for when I research pricing. And you know, I think we could use them to display more of the vintage bathing suits. They might look interesting mounted on the wall over there.” She motioned to an open expanse of wall between the floor-to-ceiling glass and the double front doors.
“Sounds great,” Bitsy said. “And since we’re throwing out ideas, what do you think about doing a poolside fashion show like Renée and Annelise’s Nana used to do? We could ask beach club members to model some of the vintage beachwear. And maybe bring in some of the current retro designs so we have plenty of different price points to sell. We could treat it like we did the Sandcastle Showdown—you know, to draw people in and sell beach club memberships and the cottages. Do you think something like that would be promotable?”
“I do,” Nikki said, already imagining the fifties-era food and drink that could be served and the local women’s groups they might tap into. “The more visible we can make the Sunshine the better. The rest of the cottages need to be sold and finished out. And this might help.”
She left Bitsy to run important errands like picking up dry cleaning and filling the car with gas. She used up another thirty minutes having it washed. The manicure and pedicure ate up another hour. Her hair, including color and cut, took two. Each hour killed felt like ten as her anticipation and impatience grew.