I walk over to get us drinks, leaving her with the pen poised, ready to sign her first book.
When I come back over, the book is closed in front of her and she has a weird look on her face.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
I place her drink in front of her and she immediately picks it up and drinks half of it. I want to warn her to take it slow, because I wasn’t shy with the vodka, but I bite my tongue because a tipsy Emma can only work to my advantage for how the rest of the night might go.
I put my drink down and pick up the book to see what she wrote. I glace at her before I open the cover. She is biting her lip and looking very unsure of herself. I blow her a kiss as I open the cover.
I look down at her script and it’s like the world stops spinning.
Ruben,
I love you
E R Morrison x
No wonder she was looking unsure of herself.
Fuck!
I have to clear my throat, “You…uh,” I stutter like a fucking idiot.
When I look up, I see the tears that were in her eyes earlier are about to break free. She stands up and goes to turn towards the bedroom. Her movement breaks me from wherever it was I went, and I quickly step to the side and stop her with an arm around her waist. I pull her with a little too much force, because she crashes into my chest. She keeps her head down, so I lift her chin with my hand so I can see her. She is resistant to move at first, but she doesn’t have a choice. When her face tilts up, she has one tear rolling down her cheek. I lean forward and stop its tracks with my lips.
I keep hold of her chin while I whisper, “You love me?”
Her eyes break from mine and she looks at my shoulder.
“Em?” I say, gaining her eye contact again and this time a subtle nod of her head.
“Yeah, I do,” she says, so quietly I almost have to make her repeat it.
“Good, because I fucking love you too,” I say, before I lift her and walk us backwards until her back hits the wall. Her legs wrap around my waist and I begin showing her just how much I mean those words.
I’m not sure I can put my finger on the point where I fell in love with her, but somewhere along the line, I did. I think I might have even started to fall that day we got caught in the rain and I piggybacked her home.
I told Emma that we could go out. I’d heard all the other women talking about them all going to a certain club, but much to my delight, she told me she’d rather stay in with me.
She went to run herself a bath after I finished showing her how much I love her, because she was complaining her legs and back were hurting from walking around all day. I used the time she was gone to make a call down for room service. I told them I’d pay double if they could get it here in the next fifteen minutes, and a whole thirteen minutes later, there was a knock at the door.
“Who’s that?” Emma calls out from the bathroom.
“No one,” I shout back before letting the guy at the door wheel in the cart with everything I ordered on. He has a smug look on his face the whole time. Yeah, I know it’s a little cliché, but so what?
I put what I want right now on a tray and carry it into the bathroom. Emma is just sinking into the mammoth about of bubbles in the giant freestanding bath that sits below a skylight showing the sunset overhead. I don’t think it could be more romantic if we tried.
“Wow, that’s impressive,” Emma comments as I place the tray on the side and slide my boxer briefs off.
“I know,” I say with a wink.
She looks over at me from the tray and her eyes go down to my dick. “Oh yeah, that too!” she says with a laugh.
If I hadn’t already made her come three times tonight, I might be slightly concerned, but I don’t have any issues with the size of anything down there.
I get myself sat at the opposite end of the bath before passing Emma a glass of champagne and balancing the plate of strawberries on the edge of the bath.
“Notorious womaniser Ruben Foster is having a bubble bath with champagne and strawberries; whoever thought that day would ever happen?” Emma jokes.
“Yeah, alright, laugh it up. I’m as shocked as the next man, but you see, when you fall in love with an amazing woman, you do things you never thought you were capable of.
“Aw.” She raises her glass before saying, “To us.”
“To you,” I say as I clink my glass against hers.
The rest of our stay was great. We got back to Emma’s early afternoon the next day, after stopping off for lunch on the way home. We spent the day doing really domesticated couply things that I never thought I’d enjoy doing. We went food shopping together, and I mowed her small patch of grass while she put the shopping away and ran the hoover around.
We just sit down to dinner when the front door gets knocked. I get up to get it, but Emma stops me, and I watch her arse as she walks off instead.
The minute I hear Emma say, “What do you want?” I’m up out of my chair and standing behind her in the doorway, looking at Danni, who has tears streaming down her face, along with a lot of black makeup.
“I just came to tell you both that I’m pregnant. And it’s yours, Ruben,” Danni says, waving a pregnancy test around.
Emma immediately stiffens in my arms and tries to shrug me off, but I just hold on to her tighter as Danni’s words settle into my brain.
“Bullshit,” I snap. “I used a condom the last time we… And don’t try the whole ‘it broke’ crap because I took it off, and I know for damn sure that it fucking didn’t.”
Danni starts sobbing harder as both Emma and I just stare at her.
“No, you didn’t, you liar.”
“Yes, I did. When you came to my house all those weeks ago, I used a condom. I’m not likely to go anywhere near you without one, if I’m honest.” I can’t help being a prick. I’m angry now, really fucking angry.
Danni’s head snaps up and she looks like she’s been slapped. “That wasn’t the last time we were together, you arsehole. The night of the fashion show ring any bells? Against the wall in the toilet of Elements, and then again over the sink.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Emma
If I don’t do something, I’m gonna be sick on my doormat.
“GET OUT,” I scream at the top of my voice. Danni takes a step back, but Ruben doesn’t move, so I turn to him and take in his shocked face as I do. “I said get out. Yes, you. Get out now,” I say, as I start to attempt to push him towards the door.
“But, I didn’t... Emma, I haven’t… It’s not mine, I swear.”
“You would say that. Now get out of my house.” As soon as he steps over the threshold, I slam the door on them and run towards the kitchen sink to empty my stomach.
I knew it was all going too well. There must be a catch when a man like Ruben Foster tells you he loves you. If I wasn’t so wrapped up in him, I might have kept my wits about me long enough to see something like this coming. Okay, well not exactly this, but something to ruin it for me.
I panic when I hear the back door rattling once the shouting has stopped outside my front door, and I’m relieved that I locked it after Ruben finished doing the garden earlier.
“Emma, open the fucking door,” he shouts, but I ignore him, instead walking to the living room and sitting down on the sofa with my head in the hands. “Emma, I swear I didn’t do anything with her that night. She’s lying. Emma, please.”
“Go away,” I sob out. I have no idea whether he hears me or not, and I don’t care. I just want it all to go away. I want to go back to twenty minutes ago when I think I was happier than I have ever been in my life, instead of being sat here now with my heart ripped to pieces. Haven’t you said from the beginning that he’s going to break your heart? the little person inside my head says, and I want to slap her into next week for being so fucking right.
“Emma, come on. I promise you that I spent all night with Fin. Yes, we went to the club, but I stayed with
Fin. I don’t think I even saw Danni there.”
The image of Ruben and me in the toilets in the exact same club from Connie’s birthday comes crashing back to me and makes me cry harder.
It takes forever, but eventually Ruben gives up when he realises that I have no intention of talking to him. As predicted, it’s not long before my phone starts ringing and Connie’s face lights up the screen. I turn it off and head up to bed.
My suitcase and bags full of books catches my eye in the doorway of my spare room, so once I get changed and settled into bed, I start hunting for the perfect bookcase for my living room to try to distract myself.
The next morning, although feeling like my heart has been run over by an articulated lorry, I decide it’s time to sort out another relationship in my life. I know she works first thing in the mornings, so once I’m confident she’ll be home, I jump in the car and head to Cheltenham.
I ring the buzzer when I get there and Taylor, her flat mate, lets me in.
“Hey, chica, it’s been forever. You look amazing, how are you?”
“Thanks, Tay. I’m good.” He looks at me with a raised eyebrow, because even I could tell from looking in the mirror this morning that I’d been crying most of the night. “Everything okay with you?”
“Always, darling, always.” He holds the door open for me and I follow him into their flat. “Lilly, you have a visitor,” he shouts down to her room.
“Do you want a coffee, Emma?” Taylor asks as he heads for the kitchen.
“Yes please.”
Lilly appears fresh from the shower just as Taylor puts a mug down on the coffee table for both of us.
“I’ll leave you to it,” he says, before disappearing down to his bedroom.
“Are you okay, Emma? You look like you’ve been crying,” Lilly says, looking concerned.
As always, when I look at her, my heart skips a beat. Yes, she looks a little skinnier and slightly more gaunt than I’ve seen her before, but it’s not her fault she looks like Hannah though, and the reason I’m here is to try to rectify the issue so we can try to be close again like we once were.
“I’ll tell you about it in a minute,” I say, blinking back the threatening tears. When she gets closer, I notice something I’ve not seen before. I reach out and move her hair out of the way. “Is that new?” I ask, referring to the scar above her eyebrow.
“Oh, yeah, Tay and I got drunk one night and I fell on the coffee table,” she says, looking a little shifty.
“Right, okay. Anyway…I want to apologise to you.”
Frown lines appear on Lilly’s face as she looks back at me, confused. “Why, you haven’t-” she starts, but I cut her off.
“Lil, you don’t need to pretend like you haven’t noticed the distance between us since Hannah died. I want to apologise for letting what I was dealing with get between us. You’re my sister and I love you. I hate that we have grown apart because of my inability to move on. I know you know how much you look like her, and that has been hard for me. But that isn’t your fault, and you shouldn’t lose your sister because of it.
“I hate that you have been ill and I haven’t been here for you, or you have felt like you haven’t been able to reach out to me. I’m so sorry, Lils. Can you forgive me?”
“Oh, Emmie,” she says, before pulling me towards her for a hug. I know she’s been ill, but she’s lost so much weight, she is skin and bones in my arms. “You don’t have to apologise. I can’t begin to imagine what you have been through; I cannot imagine my life without Dec. You have dealt with it in the best way you can. I can’t be mad at you for that.”
The tears are streaming down my face by the time she has finished. Lilly is so sweet and caring, I never should have thought she would think less of me because of this.
“And I didn’t ring you when I was ill because I felt so rough and didn’t want to pass it on to you, not because I didn’t feel like I could ring you. It really knocked me for six and I basically hibernated. Dec only came because he could tell something was wrong and wouldn’t take no for an answer. I was quite happy locked away on my own.”
“You’re feeling better now though, yeah?”
“I’m not totally there, but yeah, I’m feeling much better. So, come on, tell me why you look like a panda,” she says, steering the subject away from her.
I guess she’s referring to the black bags under my eyes, so I go on to explain about my latest drama with Ruben.
“I’m sorry, but you believe her? She sounds bat shit crazy, if you ask me,” she says when I’ve finished.
“I’m not saying I believe her, but I’m not saying I believe him, either. After the bet thing, I don’t think I’m wrong in questioning him.”
“True, but that was one mistake, Em. Look at everything else he has done for you to prove how he feels. He wouldn’t do all that if he didn’t care. She sounds like the unreliable one here, if you were to ask me. You need to speak to him.”
“I know, I know. I just need to figure out what I want to say, and to try to work out what I want, whatever the truth is.”
“Em, you’ve already told me you love him. Would you really throw that all away?”
That question plagues me for the rest of my time with Lilly and all the way home. If Danni is pregnant with Ruben’s child, would I really throw away everything I have with him?
I’m just taking my shoes off when there is a knock at my front door. I rush over to the window and peek out, thinking that it’s Ruben, but the person I see stood there has me running to the door and flinging it open. I run at such speed at him that he has to take a step back. “Daddy,” I say into his chest.
“Are you going to invite me in?” he says with a laugh, as I continue to hold on to him.
When I pull back, he directs me back into my house with his hands on my shoulders. He steers me until I’m in front of the sofa then pushes down until I sit.
“Lilly rang. She thought you might need a chat.”
And that’s all it takes for me to burst into tears again. I repeat the story again but to my dad this time, who sits and listens to the whole thing. I love that my dad cares enough to listen to my girly drama. Growing up, I didn’t know anyone else whose Dad would do that. I’ve been a Daddy’s girl from day one, though, and I know he loves the bond the two of us have.
“You just need to follow what your heart tells you, angel. No relationship is straight forward, not even mine and your mother’s. They take work, compromise, and sometimes they need fighting for. And it sounds to me like Ruben might just need you to fight for him right now, because no matter the outcome of this, I imagine he’s worried he’s going to lose you because of it. I’ve seen the way that boy looks at you, and there is no doubting his feelings.”
I feel better after a long chat with my dad. I hadn’t realised how much I’d missed him while he was away. After finding some dinner, I head to bed and sleep like a baby.
I spend all the next day at work, and thankfully it takes my mind off everything that has happened. I was grateful when I turned my phone on to find a message from Connie, letting me know that she has told Ruben to give me some space and that she will do the same, but letting me know she is there if I need anything. It must be hard for her, not getting in the middle of the stuff between us. I know she has loyalties to me as her friend, but ultimately Ruben is her brother, so she will always be on his side, no matter what.
I didn’t manage to leave the office until after six in the end. One of my regulars was having some issue with his tax that needed investigating. When I get home, there is an unexpected visitor stood at my front door, waiting for me.
“Hi, Elliot, do you want to come in?” I say when I get to him. I’ve never spoken to him. I’ve only ever seen him in passing or when he was getting beaten up by Ruben. Connie spent a lot of time with him, though, and despite Ruben’s dislike of him, I trust Connie’s judge of character. “Do you want coffee?”
“Uh, yeah, please,” he says, shifting
around on his feet, looking awkward.
“What can I do for you?”
Ruben
I promised Connie that I would give Emma some space to get her head around whatever the fuck it is that is going on. I’m trying not to be pissed off that Emma doesn’t seem to believe that I never slept with Danni that night. I know I was pissed; the amount of alcohol I put away that night was about as stupid as the fucking hot pants I had to wear, but I know for a fact that I did not sleep with her. I was too cut up over Emma finding out about the stupid fucking bet I had with Fin and her running away to even look at another woman, let alone touch one.
Fin confirmed it for me by agreeing my story about us propping the bar of the club up for the couple of hours we were there. Even he wasn’t on the pull, which I remember thinking was weird. When I got so drunk I could barely sit on the stool, he practically carried me home.
It actually hurts that she believes Danni over me, after everything that I’ve done to prove to her what she means to me, yet at the first sight of trouble, she turns on me and runs. Again.
I keep telling myself she kinda does have a reason to doubt me after the whole bet fiasco, but I thought she’d forgiven me for that, and believed it wasn’t serious.
I told her I loved her this weekend for fuck’s sake. Does that not mean anything to her? Because it sure as fuck means a lot to me. I’ve never said it to anyone other than my family before, and I don’t actually intend on ever saying it to anyone else, either. I just need to somehow come up with a way to prove that that baby isn’t fucking mine.
“Here have a beer and try to cheer the fuck up,” Fin says, throwing me a can. We have been at my new place all evening, getting the first coat of paint on the new plaster.
Angel Series Books #1-2.5 Page 92