by Lucia Jordan
Landon pressed his lips to her shoulder. “He really did a number on you didn’t he?”
“He never physically hurt me.” The sting of Zane’s betrayal—while fading—was still there, and she had a feeling that it would be for quite some time.
“Sometimes the scars on the inside are the ones that are the hardest to heal from.”
She couldn’t help the slight giggle that slipped from her lips.
“What’s so funny?”
“Are you some Zen master now?”
He didn’t laugh with her and when she looked over her shoulder at him she could see the seriousness in his beautiful eyes. “I know because I am still healing from scars that cut too deep to tell.”
“I’m sorry,” she apologized.
“Don’t be. We all deal in our own ways. This—what we just did—was how I learned to channel my hurt and frustrations. Little by little the pain eased.”
“How does that work?”
“It gives you something you lost.”
“Which is?”
“Control.”
“I hardly think I was in control, seeing how I was tied up and all.”
“On the contrary. Whether you realize it or not, you were controlling the whole scene. You held the power all in your hands.”
“How?”
“You controlled everything I did. From how and what I did, to when and where I did it. I waited on your cues.”
Gina was shocked at what he was saying because it actually made a lot of sense. She was already beginning to drift to sleep when he pulled the blanket up and over her shoulders. For the second time in her life she fell asleep feeling protected and completely safe. Sleep drifted around her as she relaxed completely inside the protective barrier of Landon’s arms.
The sound of a hushed voice brought Gina from the depths of sleep’s clutches. She could tell from the coolness at her back that Landon was no longer in bed. She looked toward the door and in the pale yellow of the hall light she could see him standing there, naked, with his back to her. He held the phone pressed to his ear with one hand on his lean hip.
“I told you not to call here,” he said in an annoyed whisper. “No I didn’t see it in my luggage and that’s a stupid excuse for you to call. Yes she’s here. That doesn’t concern you. No, I didn’t tell her. She doesn’t need to know. I’ve got to go, don’t call here again.”
Quickly Gina closed her eyes, just as Landon came back into the room and climbed into bed with her. She wanted to pretend to be asleep but the truth was, something just didn’t add up. With a sigh she sat up and hugged her knees to her chest.
“Are you sleeping with someone other than me?” she asked him bluntly. There was no need to beat around the bush.
Landon lifted himself up on an elbow and looked at her. “No.”
“Then what are you hiding? Because I just heard you on the phone. I am assuming it was Lydia from the annoyance in your voice.”
He blew out a sigh. “Yes, that was Lydia.”
“What is it that I don’t need to know?” she asked accusingly.
He blew out another labored sigh and raked his hands back through his hair. “It really doesn’t concern you. It’s not a big deal.”
“Wow! Seriously with that right now?” She slid from the bed and rounded up her clothing, most of which she had no recollection of losing during Landon’s assault on her senses.
“What?”
She just shook her head. “You are here trying to teach me how to trust again and you’re lying to me.”
“I’m not lying to you,” he defended. She could see his own anger rising. This was it. This was the moment that she would be able to tell who Landon really was.
“You sure as hell aren’t telling me the truth.”
“You want the truth? The truth is that Lydia is my partner at the law firm. We had to take the trip together.” His jaw clenched and his nostrils flared angrily.
“And?” she coaxed.
“And…while we were there we slept together.”
Lick Book 3
The only thing Gina could do was stare at Landon incredulously. Her mouth was hanging slack as her hands rested on her hips. She’d already tugged her shorts on and was in the process of doing the same with her shirt when his words stopped her cold.
As a rainbow of emotions ran rampant through her system, she had no idea what the hell she was feeling. She went from shocked to hurt, from pissed to outright furious. Finally regaining motor skills, she tugged her shirt angrily over her head. It would be so easy to break down in front of him and cry. Well, that wasn’t going to happen. She was done crying over men, and she was most certainly done with men that couldn’t keep their dicks in their pants.
Landon opened his mouth to say something but she quickly cut him off, holding up her hand.
“Don’t.”
“Gina, it’s not what…”
“If you tell me it’s not what it seems I may very well throw something at you right now. It’s never what it seems, is it Landon? Well, if it’s not what it seems then why in the hell were you not going to tell me? Hmm? Or why isn’t it any of my concern?”
He opened his mouth to answer but she stopped him again.
“You know what, I don’t really give a shit anymore.” She gave a dry laugh. “I’m sick of every man in my life being unable to keep his dick where it belongs. I thought you were different, but apparently you are just the same as all the others.”
“Now wait a minute,” he said, his face turning to stone. “If you’re thinking about comparing me to that douche bag ex-husband of yours then don’t. We are nothing alike.”
She lifted a shoulder. “Not from where I’m standing.”
“Well you don’t know shit,” he snapped.
“Apparently not. I should have gone with my better judgement and just kept away from you.”
“But you didn’t did you? You were so eager to feel something you spread your legs at the first sign of attention.” His voice was saturated with venom and fury shot through Gina like a bolt of lightning. Before she knew what was happening, her palm whipped out and landed soundly across Landon’s face.
“You bastard,” she hissed, ignoring the stinging pain in her hand.
Landon’s eyes flashed dangerously and for a moment she thought he might hit her back. Before he could touch her, she spun around and marched from the house.
Landon flinched as the front door slammed with such force, the entire house seemed to shake. “FUCK!!!” he roared. What in the hell had just happened? Everything had been going smoothly until… “Lydia,” he growled.
Landon didn’t make a habit of hating people. However, over the course of the past year, he’d rapidly begun to hate Lydia with a fierce passion. Somehow, if he had to guess, she knew that Gina would be with him, which was why she chose to call at three in the morning.
He lifted his hand to the side of his stinging face and rubbed. He needed to talk to Gina and get things straightened out. He eyed the phone in his hand and thought about calling her, but then thought the better of it. Perhaps it would just be better to allow her to cool off for a couple of days. That theory was probably a good idea for him as well because, honestly, he was pissed as hell. The down side was he wasn’t sure who he was mad at.
Gina stormed into the house with the force of a hurricane. She was trembling violently as she leaned against the front door and slid to the cold tiled floor. Tears burned her eyes as she rested her head on the tops of her knees.
“Stupid. Stupid. Stupid,” she chanted as the tears slipped from her lashes. Landon’s words had sliced through her like a knife, and what sucked the most was the fact that they had been right. She’d been so desperate to shed Zane and the past that she’d been all too willing to bend over and flash her goods for Landon. She felt cheap and used, but nothing short of what she deserved.
From somewhere overhead she heard a thump. Soon following was the sound of squeaking bed springs and heavy moa
ns. She ran her fingers through her hair and clutched her head. The makings of a breakdown were close on hand.
She took several deep breaths, calming her thundering heart and frayed nerves. She was wide awake and knew there would be no possible way she could go back to sleep. Slowly she hauled herself to her feet. For a moment she contemplated going upstairs, but the chorus of moans had turned into a rather annoying scream.
“I don’t think so,” she said as she walked toward the patio. She really didn’t want to hear any more about her brother’s prowess. Instead, she stripped out of her clothes and dove into the dark pool. The water was cold and it nearly stole her breath but it was already starting to calm her. When she broke the surface, she gasped and went right back under.
After she’d swam the length of the pool several times, her arms felt like lead. Rolling over onto her back, she floated along the water’s surface. The stars glittered overhead against the inky blackness of the night sky.
“What am I going to do, Momma,” she said softly.
She stared at each shimmering star, hoping to find the answers written in their silent beauty. But, no matter how long she waited, her answer could not be found there.
Her thoughts swirled around Landon. She’d gone too far and knew it. She hadn’t realized until she was wrapped up in Landon how desperate she’d been for attention. It had been so long since she’d been showed any type of affection that it made it easy for her to get lost in the feeling. It was the feeling that she mattered so much to someone that made all the difference in the world.
Tears slipped from her eyes and softly splashed into the pool. The air was slightly cool but it didn’t matter. Parts of her body were still humming from her lovemaking session with Landon. As her thoughts began to take her back to what had happened between them only a few hours earlier, she let out a frustrated growl and put her feet on the pool’s floor.
Her eyes were pulled up to Landon’s bedroom, and she could have sworn she saw a flicker of movement on the other side of the glass. Was he watching her? The thought of him laughing at the naive fool she’d been stabbed through her head. How stupid could she have been?
Refusing to let him see her deflated—if he was watching—she climbed from the pool with squared shoulders and a defiant tilt of her chin. Brazenly she removed a towel from the shelf and wrapped it around her torso, securing it tightly between her breasts. Slowly she turned and looked up at his window but the only thing she could see was blackness. The urge to flip him off was strong. She knew he was there watching her because she could feel his eyes on her, and it pissed her off.
Angrily she turned her back and marched into the house. Once up in her room she went directly to the window and drew the heavy blinds closed roughly. There would be no more peep shows for him.
Somehow those thoughts left her feeling more empty and alone than ever.
***
Four weeks passed before Gina was ready to move out of her brother’s house and into her own place.
“You don’t have to move,” Bryan said as they drank coffee and ate breakfast.
Gina took a bite of her toast but it tasted like sawdust. Washing down the offending toast with a sip of orange juice she nodded her head. “Honestly, Bry, I need too. I can’t handle running into anymore half-naked or completely naked chicks. Not to mention the walls are not sound proof.” She half groaned in disgust.
Her brother had the decency to blush as he looked down at his half eaten bagel. “Yeah, sorry about that.”
“Seriously, dude, what’s with all the sex?”
“Okay, one—don’t call me dude, and two—I don’t believe it is any of your business,” he said playfully.
“It is if it’s going to get your whorein’ ass into trouble at the college,” she said with a frown.
“Look at you all grown up and speaking your mind,” he said as he lifted his brows.
She frowned and threw a spoon at him. “Shut up. Seriously though, what’s the deal? You haven’t always been like this.”
His playful demeanor shifted suddenly. “Just leave it alone, Gin,” he said as he grabbed his dishes and walked to the sink.
She frowned. Her brother was rarely bothered by anything, but it was very obvious that he was troubled. So she pushed. “What is going on with you? You can’t tell me that sleeping with all these random girls is helping you or making you feel better.”
Bryan turned and leaned on the counter, crossing his muscled arms over his chest. “I’ll share if you share. Tell me, sister. What happened with Landon? Why haven’t you returned any of his calls, or come out of your room much at all for that matter?”
The tables had just turned and she had to admit she was not a fan of being cast in the spotlight. Her brother gave her a smug look. “That’s what I thought.”
There was no resisting the urge as she lifted her middle finger. He just laughed. On the table Gina’s phone buzzed. The smile fell from her face when she looked at the screen. Landon was calling her again. He usually tried calling once or twice a day and every day she ignored him.
“I don’t understand why the dunce just doesn’t come over here,” Bryan muttered over his coffee.
“Are you seriously sticking up for him?”
“No, I just think you should hear him out. I know him and he hates Lydia. She’s a bitch.”
“Yes, I know this, but he out right told me he slept with her.”
“And did you let him explain?”
“BRYAN, what is there to explain? He lied to me and then out right admitted he was sleeping with her.”
“I just think there might be more to it than that,” he said as he dumped the remaining coffee down the drain.
“What happened to you breaking his neck if he hurt me?” she shot as she crossed her arms over her chest.
“I meant if it was valid.”
“And you don’t think this is?”
Bryan shook his head. “I really don’t. Do I think you jumped in too quickly with him after your divorce, yes I do. Do I think you made a mistake with him? No I don’t. He’s a good guy and I know he would never hurt you.”
“You know what. I don’t give a shit what you think. Stay the hell out of my love life,” she snapped. She grabbed her phone from the counter and made her way to the foyer where the last of her boxes was sitting. How in the hell had she accumulated so much junk in only four weeks?
About as pissed as a person could get, Gina grabbed the boxes and marched out the front door and down the sidewalk to where her car was parked. Her divorce settlement had finally cleared the bank and what a beautiful little settlement it had been. Apparently, Zane had been hoarding their money, making her wear clothes that were worn or bought at a second hand store. She’d been shocked to see that her part of the settlement had been close to two million dollars. Her lawyer said that while Zane had a crazy amount of money, he’d been forced to sell a share of the company to get the remaining.
With Bryan’s help, she’d found a two bedroom house a block away from his house. It was perfect and it had a pool. The back yard also had a good size building that had been used for a pool house but she’d decided to turn it into her photography studio. She had all her equipment and had even began booking some jobs.
As she slipped behind the wheel of the car the heat blasted her. It was just barely ten in the morning and the inside of her car felt like an oven. Everything around her swam for a moment as dizziness washed over her. With shaking hands she turned the keys in the ignition. The vents blasted warm air at first but soon it cooled off. Her stomach twisted, causing her to feel slightly ill.
After the uneasiness settled she backed out into the street and made her way to her new house. It was time to start all over again, and she was going to be happy even if it killed her.
***
Gina lounged out by her pool in the deck chair she’d stolen from her brother. The setting sun kissed her skin. She took a long pull on her beer and grimaced. It tasted horrible. Then
again she had swiped it from her brother’s fridge and there wasn’t any telling how old it was. It had been a long day but when she looked around, she felt a strong sense of pride. She finally had a place to call her own, and while the pool wasn’t as large as her brother’s, it was big enough and exactly perfect.
“This is a nice place you’ve got here,” a voice said from behind her.
Gina jumped so violently that she rolled out of her chair and hit the rough ground. “What the hell?” she grunted as she climbed to her feet. “Do you not know how to knock?” she snapped as she batted his hand away.
Landon looked down at her sheepishly. “I didn’t think you would answer.”
“Well, you would have been right about that. Now, get the hell out of my house.”
She tried to ignore the happy little leap her heart did in her chest when her eyes met his. Has he always been so tall? He was wearing a pair of swimming trunks and a beach bum tank top showcasing his broad chest and rippling arms. That’s so not fair.
“I’m not leaving until you listen to what I have to say.” He took a step closer, forcing her to take a step back. Zane used to get into her space as a way of intimidation, but for some reason she didn’t fear Landon. There was a tiny piece of her—deep down—that knew he would not lay a hand on her.
“I’ve heard what you have to say,” she snapped as she pushed around him. She managed to get about four steps before his big hand closed around her arm, stopping her suddenly.
“Damn it woman, I have let you pout and throw a fit long enough.”
Anger filled every cell in her body. “Are you…you have to be…” she sputtered, as she was too angry to complete a sentence.
“Yes, you were, and believe me, I want to bend you over my legs and spank that perfect little ass of yours until it glows for being so stubborn.”
The mental image of what he described cause warmth to flow between her legs.
Now we’re talking, her body cheered.
She opened her mouth to say something but the sharp look on his face caused her mouth to snap shut. Instead she jerked out of his grasp and crossed her arms defiantly over her chest.
“Now, going back to the night you so childishly ran out.”