Finding Willow (Hers)

by Dawn Robertson

  “You know, you are on my side of the bed,” he teases me as he strips down to his boxer-briefs. I try not to ogle anymore, but it is so damn hard.

  “I could move, but I didn't think you would mind. I mean coming home to me in your bed and all.” I wink at him. I’m sure neither of us expected him to come home and find all this. I pictured him rolling back into my motel room again. Spending our time together fucking like animals up against the wall inside the door.

  “You’re right, but right now, I don't want you anywhere else.” I want to smile at his honesty. My heart skips a beat, or twelve.

  “I gotta tell you something.”

  He grimaces, and I am almost positive he is waiting for me to dish some bad news. He sits on the edge of the bed and pulls the covers back. He looks at me, nods, and waits for me to start talking. I can't help it. A stupid smile spreads across my face.

  “I bought a house.”

  His eyes darken as his lips press together in a straight line. He seems mad. Why would he be mad? “Before you get your boxers in a fucking twist, it is here, in Woodstock.” Relief washes over his face, and the corner of his lip turns up just slightly. He doesn't want to give away that he is actually happy.

  “I bought the old rental off of Jupiter Lane.”

  His eyebrow raises in question.

  “That old dive?”

  I want to hit him for talking about my house like that, but to the everyday person, it is a fucking dive. Not everyone can see the beauty behind it.

  “Yup, it was my favorite house in Woodstock when I was a girl. I took a drive up there to check it out. I should have the keys on Monday. Know any good contractors?” I talk as quickly as Scarlett does when she is excited about something.

  “Honey, I own a contracting company. Whatever you want, we will do.” He kisses the top of my head and pulls me into his arms. Well, isn't that just fucking convenient? I melt into his body, while I bask in his strong embrace.

  I shouldn't feel this way; I shouldn't want to feel this way, but I do. He has taken a piece of my heart, as much as I should shield it from him.

  His face nuzzles into my neck, and he places a kiss on my cheek. I want so bad to pull at the remaining clothes we have on, but the sick child only a couple yards away in the living room stops me. However, she doesn't stop him one bit. He pulls me over his body, so that I’m straddling his lap in the bed, and I can feel him pulling at the hem of my giant loose t-shirt. In the blink of an eye, it is over my head, and I am in nothing but a pair of simple cotton panties.

  “Your daughter,” I whisper into his ear, as I lick down his neck with my tongue. I want to stop, but I am losing my willpower. His dick is rock hard against my moist cunt, and he continues to nudge my wetness through the last pieces of clothing we have on.

  “She won't come in here,” he replies as he sucks on my earlobe. That spot, that fucking spot, drives me wild.

  His mouth covers mine and his tongue doesn't stop licking my bottom lip until I finally open and let him in. I can feel his hands running all over my body, squeezing my full breasts before settling on my ass. His hips buck off the bed, pushing his hardness against me again, harder this time. His force is enough to get me off on the spot. I am hanging on by a single thread, while we’re dry humping like we are fucking kids again.

  His big hands leave my ass, finding their way in between our entwined bodies. His ass lifts again, and he’s naked. His legs push his missing boxer-briefs to the end of the bed, and his hands move to grip my waist. I pull my mouth from his, licking and sucking up his neck until I can whisper in his ear once again.

  “You need a condom, baby.”

  He lets out a long sigh. I know he’s annoyed. I feel like the safe sex police. He doesn't make a move; instead, I feel him tugging my panties to the side, running his rough fingertip along my clit. I try to buck my hips in response to the tender touch, but his other hand is still firmly gripping my hip.

  “Just for a minute, baby,” he coos into my ear. I can't help but melt. I should say no, but I don't. It has been so long since I have had the feeling of good raw sex. Not meaningless on set bullshit, but real fucking. So, against my better judgment, I don't stop him.

  “Just a minute,” I repeat as he pushes my panties further to the side, and he slides his big cock right inside my wet pussy. Inch-by-inch, it slides in with ease, and I throw my head back with ecstasy. I can feel every delicious piece of his impressive dick, piercing and all. The metal balls run along the inner walls of my cunt, teasing and touching places I never even fucking knew existed. As he pulls out, it rubs along my clit and he pushes right back in. As he bottoms out within my tight pussy, I can feel the piercing caressing my g spot. God, there is no way I am going to be able to stop him from going raw again. It just feels too fucking mind-blowing. God damn it! Fuck condoms.

  I want to scream, but I can't. I let out a strangled moan, and his hand flies up to my mouth, covering it forcefully as he slams his dick inside of me. I meet each thrust and then some. He slows his pace, lying on the bed and letting me be the one to work up and down his length. And boy, do I.

  I slowly slide up and down at first, appreciating every inch. His hands move above his head, watching every move I make. He only breaks eye contact on occasion to look down to where our slick bodies are joined. His lazy gaze rakes up my body, watching my tits bounce as my pace quickens.

  With every movement, I can feel the build of my own orgasm. I grind my hips and my swollen clit begs for release. Chrome finally moves his hands from his lounging position, running them over my tits as I continue to ride his cock. His fingers roughly pinch my nipples and I just can't hold back anymore.

  “Fuck!” I scream, realizing his hands are leaving my tits and heading for my mouth. His palm covers my lips tightly just as I start to come. I scream against his hand, as he continues pumping his thick erection into me. My body falls onto his chest, and I quietly try to catch my breath, still slowly riding him. I'm fucking exhausted and, as much as I want to keep going, my body has given up on me.

  Chrome flips me over onto my back, his dick still deep within me. Lifting my leg and placing it on his shoulder, he begins to pound into me. He’s desperately searching for his own release. The pierced tip of his dick caresses my g spot over and over again, and I begin to feel another orgasm creeping up on me. His pumps become more forceful and his hand grabs at my neck. That is all I need to start coming all over again. I let out a low moan, as quiet as I can. He franticly pulls out just as his come shoots all over my stomach and cunt.

  “Fuck,” he breathes out, stroking his dick through his own orgasm. It is officially the hottest thing I have ever fucking seen. Burst after burst of hot come drenches my body as his face contorts with pleasure.

  He looks down and catches my gaze. I can't help but watch him. You would think after all these years of porn, something this erotic would do nothing for me. But God, he is fucking beautiful in every way there is. His dick is still firmly in his palm when he blows out a long breath, and he finally speaks.

  “God, I think I am in love with you.” The words slip so casually from his mouth, but all I can do is stare at him like a deer in headlights. His demeanor changes when he notices the shock on my face. I can feel the tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. I don't want to cry. I don't want to flip out, but I am pretty fucking sure I am about to. Damn it all to hell! Why did he have to go there?

  “Shhh, relax, Star.” His fingers trail down the side of my face and I will myself to calm the fuck down somehow. I take a deep breath, trying to think of what comes next.

  “No one has ever said that to me.” I am almost dazed thinking about it. It’s the truth. Not even Seven. All those years and those three words were never exchanged.

  “I don't want to fuck up whatever this is. I'm sorry; I let my emotions get the best of me. I am not good at keeping them under wraps.” He’s flustered. Upset. At himself, I think.

  “It's okay. Really,” I reassur
e him. Maybe getting out of the house and seeing exactly what needs to be done at my very own home would be the best plan for my day. “You should get some rest, Chrome.”

  “What are your plans for the day?” he asks.

  I’m still trapped under his body. I can't make my break for it until he moves. His come is slowly starting to dry all over me, while we sit here and have this heart-to-heart. As if he can sense my anxiety over being trapped under his body, he shifts his weight while looking for something to clean up with. He tosses his discarded t-shirt to me, and I start to wipe up the mess. Definitely going to need a shower.

  “I’m going to go over to my house and see what needs to be done. Make a list, so I can get the construction going once I have the keys.” The fact that I am waiting for keys is hysterical. The house is wide open. I am sure people have come and gone on their own for some time. Including the local wildlife. The door was cracked open and one of the large picture windows had no glass, so I figure it won't be hard to get in.

  “There is no way you are going over there on your own. I know that piece of shit has been following you. No fucking way, Star. It just isn't safe.” His concern warms me. It’s completely founded, but I hate feeling like a victim. I vowed I wouldn't live like that anymore. I don't want Blue to rule my life anymore. No way.

  “I'm fine. I'm not scared of him.” I say it with bravado. I’m trying to convince myself, even though the thought of being alone with him sends me into a panic.

  Scarlett's voice cries from the living room and catches Chrome's attention.

  “Daddy, please stay here with me, can I come sleep in your bed?” He can't stay no to her. I can see him lose the battle, and I know I will be able to make my way out for the day without him acting like a bodyguard. He stands, takes a couple paces across the room, and pulls back the bottom of an old movie poster on the wall. There is a small safe built into the wall and he turns the knob a few times before it pops open. I try not to be nosy. I don't want to know what is inside the safe. It isn't my business.

  “If you are going to be so fucking stubborn, I want you to take this with you.” When he turns around, I see it. He is holding a small, black handgun. I want to recoil away from him, but the simple idea of keeping that with me, even just in my purse, makes me feel so much safer with Blue creeping around. The more I think about it, the more I know I would never use it. Not in a million years. But it fucking empowers me in a way I have never been empowered before. It reaffirms the fact that I will never be a victim again.

  “Chrome, I don't even know how to use that,” which is the honest truth. I have never even held a gun in my life. He begins a little Gun 101 class right there in his bedroom, and I feel a little bit more comfortable. I know I don't need the experience of shooting it to know how to keep myself safe and not shoot my own fucking foot off. It’s common sense. I carefully place the firearm into my purse and head for a much needed shower.

  “Go to bed. I am going to freshen up and head out. I'm gonna stop at Maggie's and get Scarlett some more soup, too. If you want anything before I get back, just call me.” I lock myself in the bathroom. His bathroom. I lock him out of his own damn bathroom. I laugh because I know if I don't, there is no way I am ever going to get out of this house today.

  God, I’ve missed him.

  It's A Party

  After fully surveying the outside of the house, listing all the yard work that needs to be done, I make my way toward the porch. The lawn is overgrown, the trees need to be trimmed, and some need to be pulled, along with a bunch of old shrubs that smell like cat pee. The driveway leading up to the house is far too overgrown to be safe; that will need to be the first thing accomplished.

  I climb the steps and I hear something inside the house. It’s dark and out in the middle of nowhere. With the shade of the overgrown trees, I can't see much, even with the sunlight. I should have brought a fucking flashlight. That would have been the smart thing to do. I write it down on the top of my list with a bunch of exclamation points, because those will apparently make me not forget next time around.

  I hear it again. It sounds like claws on wood. I don't want to find out what the sound is. I stomp on the porch a couple times, hoping to scare the shit out of whatever is scaring the shit out of me. My foot goes right through the rotted out board in the porch. Fuck. Damn. My luck.

  I look up at the missing window as I pull my foot free, and I can see two eyes staring at me. I scream like the little bitch I am. I turn to run away, but my fucking foot slips right back into the hole I just created. Just then the owner of the eyes jumps out of the window and runs off the porch. My life flashes before my eyes, but it was only a fucking raccoon. You have got to be fucking shitting me. Maybe I am not cut out to live in the middle of the woods.

  I laugh to myself and wonder how many more of those little fuckers are rooming for free in my new house. I won't be going inside to find out. Maybe I can get some kind of animal wrangler out here to put some traps in the house.

  I pick my bag up from the porch where I dropped it minutes before and sling it back over my shoulder. I am so fucking done with this place today. A branch snaps in the distance; I can hear it crash through the cool fall afternoon. It is a common sound in these parts, especially this time of year. I unlock the car and climb in, backing up onto the grass so I can drive straight down the narrow driveway. I can barely drive, let alone back up all that way.

  That is when I fucking notice it. That loud branch that fell Directly across the fucking driveway. There is no way I can get past it, and no way I can move the overgrown log on my own. Fuck it all to hell! My damn luck!

  I put the car in park, grab my purse, and get out to see if it is as bad as it looks. Of course it is. The trunk of the oversized branch is too heavy for me to kick, let alone drag. I dig through my purse finally locating my phone and dialing Chrome. It rings for what seems like forever. His sleepy voice fills the line.

  “Yeah, I am totally stuck at the house. This huge branch fell across the driveway.” I stomp my foot on the ground, as if he can see my little fucking fit through the phone. Not that I have anyplace else to actually be, but I hate being stuck anywhere.

  “I will be there in a few. Is it a big branch? Do I need a chainsaw?”

  I would think so. I mean, from the size of it, I would think he would need help. Although with arms like his, I wouldn't put it past him to just pick the shit up and toss it to the side. I chuckle to myself.

  “Just come quick, I miss...”

  I try to get the last word out when something hits me from behind. The phone goes flying and I scream. Shit, that hurt. I look up, expecting to see more branches falling down, but I can see clearly up to the sky. Not a hanging branch in sight. What the fuck?

  My ears start ringing and instantly my head is throbbing. Of course, this is exactly what I get for coming here all by myself. I take a few steps and turn to walk back to my car, but I am paralyzed.

  It all fucking makes sense now.

  Nothing fell on me. Nothing about this was an accident, because about three yards in front of me stands Blue, holding a huge branch and standing next to a handheld saw. I might as well start my fucking Hail Marys now because he is going to kill me. Right here. In the middle of nowhere. He’ll hide the body and no one is ever going to hear from me again. I am never going to find my daughter. I am never going to know the love of a child. I will never see my thirtieth birthday.

  My mind runs a mile a minute, thinking of all the possible ways he is going to kill me and chop me into pieces with the saw lying on the ground. I close my eyes and the tears start to fall. I swore I would never be his victim again, but some things just never change.

  “I told you, Princess. You will always be mine. Stop fighting me. I have waited a long time for our family to be together.” His words make me want to vomit. My stomach churns, and I take a few steps back trying to put as much distance between us as I can.

  Each step backward I take, he takes another
step in my direction until my feet hit the branch. Fucking trapped again. I run through my mind; how can I get through to him? What kind of weakness can I play on that will make him leave me be? Leave me unharmed?

  “Blue, if you ever cared about me, even the tiniest bit... you won't do this. You won't hurt me.” My voice shakes just as much as my body. I grip my purse tight against my chest. Holding it as if it is going to protect me from him.

  “I would never hurt you, Princess. You’re my everything.”

  I don't know why but his words snap something inside of me. I should be upset or sad. But I am fucking pissed. Rage floods through my body like fucking Niagara Falls. He would never hurt me?

  “You would never fucking hurt me? Never hurt me? All you have done my entire life is hurt me! You ruined me! You took everything from me! I was a fucking child, Blue! A little girl!” My chest heaves, and I clench my bag tighter.

  “You raped me! You took my fucking virginity by force! You don't care about me! You never fucking did! You would have never done that if you cared. You don't know what it means to care about another person. You take what you want and toss away the rest like fucking garbage!” My hand balls into a fist. I want to punch him. I want to hit him with the branch he is holding in his hands.

  “I never hurt you, Star. You wanted it!”

  The fucking balls on him. The fucking absolute audacity! I stand there in disbelief. Does he really fucking believe what he is saying?

  My hands loosen and I remember the moments before I left Chrome at his house this morning. The fucking gun held safely inside my purse. I won't hurt him. I won't turn into a monster like he is. Maybe if I scare him, though, he will back up and leave me alone. Let me go unharmed.

  But his words continue to repeat through my mind. You wanted it. I was an eight-year-old child. I was a sixteen-year-old virgin. I didn't want anything. I said no. I said stop. I screamed for help, but nobody came to my rescue. Nobody helped me!

  “I didn't want it. I begged you to stop, but you ignored me. You ignored me! You hurt me! You ruined me! You ruined my entire fucking life!”