by Skylar Heart
10
Jake
Things are starting to get to a point where I’m going to have to make a decision soon. A decision of if I’m staying here or not. Of course, with the guys and Mia here, I’d love to stay, I really wish I could stay, but part of me also knows that it’s going to be a lot more complicated to stay here when it comes to my job. Having my own car would solve part of the problem, but that would still mean I’d have to travel back and forth a lot, and that I’d be away from home for long days. I don’t really want that, even though I also don’t want to give up doing research, as I love it and it really suits me... It’s what I’ve been working towards for all my life.
I’m on my way back home from the second meeting this week, driving Mia’s grandma’s car this time, since it was apparently perfectly fine, if a little dusty. My first meeting was on Tuesday and today it’s Friday. It feels like my days are filled with work and travel, especially when I have to be in the city, but I also don’t want to stay at my studio, just to avoid having to travel so much on a single day because I don’t want to spend much time at that place anymore. It no longer feels like home...
Only, travelling to the coast all the time doesn’t seem to be the best plan either. It’s a lot of work, it’s expensive and just takes so much time. So my options are to find work closer to the house or to move back to the city, or even to a place closer to the city than this is, but I don’t want move out of the house, so I guess finding better work is my only option. Maybe someone at the research centre knows a good place or I can just look around myself.
The music I’m playing cuts off as my phone starts to ring. A quick glance at the screen tells me it’s Mia, I smile as I pick up. “Hi, beautiful.”
“Hey.” She laughs. “How close are you? Do you want us to leave you some food in the fridge?”
“It’ll be another hour before I’m back. Things ran a little late.” I turn onto a smaller road. “Keep me company, please? What did you do today?”
She laughs again and then I hear her sit down in a chair at the kitchen table, the sound of one of the chairs being moved unmistakable, it has this very distinctive squeak. “I didn’t do a lot. Elly was here all day, so I tried to entertain her.”
“Wasn’t Mal with you? Couldn’t he help out?”
“He locked himself in the room upstairs, said he was working on his music all day.” She lets out a lightly frustrated sound. “I think he was just trying to get out of looking after his niece.” Her voice changes a little, turns teasing, and I can hear Mal object to her observation on her end.
“Sounds like he’s no longer hiding?” I can’t help my grin at the idea of Mal hiding from the little girl, pretending to work on his music, while Mia is going all around the house and garden, constantly trying to catch up with the active toddler.
“No.” Her voice goes softer. “He’s definitely no longer hiding.”
Then Mal’s voice sounds a lot closer to the phone, nearly purring, he sounds way too satisfied. “Hi, Jake. If you don’t hurry up, I’m going to have my merry way with her, you know?”
I laugh, getting hard just at the idea of the two of them touching and fucking. “As long as you save enough energy for me later. I think I’d like to have a go at your ass next.”
“Jake!” Mia’s voice is a little hoarse, no matter how shocked she tries to sound.
“Unless you want me to do your ass?” I love teasing her, especially now it’s no longer just a fantasy of mine and now I’ll actually have her in my arms tonight.
“No...” Her voice strays off.
“No?” I smirk. “That doesn’t sound so sure. Is that a firm ‘no’ or an ‘I don’t dare to admit that I’d love you up my ass as Mal ploughs my pussy’?”
“Nggm.” That sounds more like a suppressed moan than anything else and I look at my phone for a moment, almost scared the connection is getting bad or something like that, but it still shows I’ve got four bars. I don’t want to accidentally drop out mid-fun.
There’s a sound over the phone, and then Mal’s laughing voice. “What did you just tell her? She’s bright red and hiding her face in her hands right now.”
“Mal! Give it back!” That’s Mia in the background and Mal snickers before I hear a door open and close.
“No matter what you told her, I think she likes the idea.” I can still hear the smile in his voice.
“Did you hear any of what I said?” I can’t help my own grin, just simple banter, comfortable banter.
“Nah. I just said things, but I couldn’t hear your words, she was keeping the phone too far away from me.” He moves again, his voice going more muffled, and then I hear the ‘click’ of a lighter.
“I was just teasing her. If she likes the idea enough, she’ll tell you about it herself.” I wish I could have a cig right now, but I promised the others I wouldn’t smoke in the car.
“Sounds like a plan. Now to just get it out of her...” He lets out a breath of smoke.
I wish I was already there, to see Mia’s bright red face, but also because I love watching Mal when he stops worrying too much. Watching him smoke is beautiful, he looks so much more relaxed and very kissable when he smokes, his lips wrapped about the cigarette and it always makes me want to kiss him.
“Jake?” His voice sounds like he’s said my name a couple of times already.
“Yeah?” Whoops.
“Can I come to the city with you next time? I need to pick up a couple of things for my guitar and recording gear.”
“Yeah, sure. You think you can entertain yourself all day there?”
He laughs. “I was thinking that I’d spend the rest of the day working in quiet at your studio. It would be nice to get some quiet time for a while.”
“Sure. As long as you don’t jerk off all over my bed or weird things like that.” We both laugh and I’ve got an idea. “You can use my studio in the city any time you want. I probably won’t be there much anyway, and you can always come along with me when I need to drive there anyway. Just make sure you wake up on time.” Which isn’t always the easiest with him.
“Thanks. I’ll have to think about that. Being able to play without a headset once in a while would be nice.” He moves. “Okay. It’s fucking cold outside, I’m going back in. See you soon.”
“Later.” I grin as I disconnect the call.
It’s not just the being with Mia that makes my life so much easier these days, but it’s also the having a family who cares and who just accept me for who I am. The guys seem to like having me around, they don’t care that I sometimes need a little quiet time, or that when I work I’m really hard to break out of that focus, they just let me be.
I don’t feel like I’ve had many friends like that. Most people like me because I’m ‘crazy smart’ or things like that and I never feel like myself around them because they want me to act a certain way, or talk a certain way, when I just want to be me and relax once in a while. I have to be the ‘smart guy’ enough when I’m at the lab or at university, I don’t need it from ‘friends’ too...
At the lab, they kind of looked at me with curiosity because I worked from home so much these last weeks. Some people don’t care where I work as long as I finish my tasks and notes, but I’ve also had enough ‘hey, don’t you have people who wait for you when you come home?’ questions from others that I know they worry about me being alone all the time. Me not showing up all the time seems to imply to them that I’m no longer always alone, that seems to make them happier too. Though I’m not so sure how I feel about that. My life is none of their business, no matter how much they like to meddle in it.
If we’re going to make this happen, this all living together, then we’re going to get a lot of questions, intrusive questions, and I hate that, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get around it, because that seems to be how most people are, especially in labs for some reason.
Now I really want to be at the house, surrounded by the people I love.
Of course, the coolest thing would be if I could start my own lab in a small hut in the garden or something, but that’s not going to happen, so I guess I’ll have to find another way to deal with this travelling stuff. I guess talking to Dylan about it may be a good idea, and the others too, see if we can come up with a plan.
11
Mia
“What colour would you like?” I’m in the paint section of a hardware store with Elly and Tom.
Dylan, Mal and Jake are cleaning out the final things from Elly’s new room and we’re picking up some paint and supplies to make the room really hers.
I’ve not heard back from my parents yet, but I don’t want to wait any longer on their answer, we can just start doing this now. We don’t have to wait to start doing some painting around the place, if my parents decide to sell the house, it’ll be freshly painted, and Elly can choose new colours for her room in a new house. Nothing lost, only gained, because doing this feels like we’re finally making progress, that we’re really all moving into the house, we’re really all moving in together.
Elly stares at the wall with the cards with all the different colours on it, apparently unable to decide.
Tom grins, putting his hand on my lower back for a moment, leaning in close. “I’ll pick up paints for our room. You help her here. This may take a while.” And he wanders off, a silly smile on his face.
We’re also repainting the room we all sleep in, but we’re just painting that a plain white, since that’s the easiest and suits well with some of the dark wooden elements that are already in the room.
I kneel next to Elly, trying to see things more from her perspective and I have to admit that there’s a lot of choice, way too much. “What colour do you like best?”
She immediately points to a super bright red and I flinch.
“I agree. That’s a really pretty colour, but I don’t think that’s the best colour for your whole room, right?”
She shakes her head, grinning. “Firetruck colour.”
“Yes, that’s the colour of firetrucks. Not really the colour of bedrooms.” I pick her up, since the more pastel colours are higher up and aren’t as easy for her to see. “What about this colour? It looks a little like the colour of your shirt.” She’s wearing a white shirt with light blue sleeves and I hold the little light blue coloured card next to her sleeves.
She giggles but shakes her head. “Not blue.”
“Okay, not blue. What colour will you choose then?” I walk to the end with more green colours. “This one?” I hand her a pale green card and she takes it, frowning as she thinks it over.
“Maybe?” It’s not a no, so that’s progress.
I walk to the other side, first past the purple, picking up a couple of cards there and then to the pink, picking up even more. Then we go to a low table and I lay out all the cards in front of her. “Which ones do you like?” They’re all appropriate for a kid’s room, not so bright that your eyes pop out of your head all the time, but not exactly white either. ‘Friendly’ would be the right word for them, they’re welcoming and bright without being glaring.
She moves the cards around, quietly mumbling to herself, dropping some off the table, which I quickly pick back up, until she’s left with a pastel lavender and the pastel green card from before in front of her.
Right then, Tom comes back over and he kneels next to her. “Those are pretty.”
Elly nods, frowning. “Pretty.” She grabs both cards. “Want.” Then she holds them out to Tom, who laughs.
“Guess our girl has decided.” He smiles, accepting both of them. “We’ll get an off-white to go with them and then we can paint the top half of the wall white and the bottom half either of these colours. It should work.” He looks so happy, almost proud, and his eyes are all bright, giving me a gooey feeling in my stomach.
Fuck, the man is sexy...
“Okay.” He stands up. “Let’s go get these colours mixed up.” He holds his hand out to Elly, who is also beaming, so proud of herself.
Then Elly turns around and holds her hand out to me too and I take her hand as we walk to the counter where they mix the paints. This feels strange. This almost feels like we’re a family, like Elly is our daughter and not Tom and Poppy’s daughter, it feels weird even when I think it should make me feel happier, but it doesn’t really. It just reminds me of the things that happened in the past that make this situation not a happy one...
The lady behind the counter looks at us and then at Elly, warmly smiling. “Are these for your room?”
Elly nods, grinning. “Yes. My new room.”
“Ah, you moved? That’s cool.” Then she looks up at me. “Must be amazing, having a kid at an age where they start to make their own choices. You’ve got a beautiful and very smart girl on your hands.”
I nod, not really saying anything. Telling her that Elly isn’t my daughter feels wrong right now, and it’s none of her business anyway.
Luckily, she turns to Tom, asking him about the type of paint he needs and things like that and Elly pulls me along as she finds something more interesting to look at.
There’s a list of things I don’t want to deal with right now and explaining our family situation to strangers is definitely at the top of it...
“That was awkward.” I groan as I slide into the passenger seat, Elly is strapped in the back, happily playing with some toys as she chatters about purple and green and painting, all excited.
“When?” Tom checks around before starting the car.
“When we were mixing the paints.” I sigh, looking through my bag for my phone. “The woman’s assumptions about us being a family.”
“Ah.” He nods. “Yeah, I guess that can be a little strange.”
I look at him, not sure about his words, and he lets out a slow breath.
“When I go by myself, people will comment how cute it is that I take my daughter everywhere and that it’s great I’m ‘giving mama some time to herself’, so this was less awkward than that, by far.” He reaches out, taking my hand. “Because everything she said was true. Elly may not legally be your kid, but you do take care of her in day-to-day situations, and she definitely is smart.” He gives me a soft smile and I smile back.
I guess I can understand that this situation is a lot less awkward than what he normally encounters.
Then he pulls a face. “Plus, at least this time Elly didn’t answer that her mummy is dead so she wouldn’t need time to herself.”
“Wow.” I glance back at the bright girl.
“Yeah, that’s what you also get at that age. At least there was little potential for awkward three-year-old comments this time.” He grins as he backs out of the parking spot. “You’ll get used to it, and the looks you’ll get.”
I want to let out a curse, but won’t with Elly around. One thing I’m definitely not looking forward to is having to deal with those types of questions and looks.
Before I can fall into dark thoughts too much, Tom speaks again. “But then you also get to live with the little girl who can’t decide between purple and green on her walls and who is looking forward to painting her whole room by herself.” He laughs and I can’t help my own laugh. Yeah, we also get the bright little girl who feels like she can take on the whole world by herself, and that’s amazing for other reasons.
Just as we’re driving off the parking lot, my phone buzzes and it’s a call from Dad. I pick up, not sure what to expect. “Hi, Dad.”
“Hey. How are you?” He sounds pretty neutral, but that’s a skill he has. He’s great at not giving away his emotions, especially when he has bad news.
“I’m good. On our way back from the hardware store, we picked up some painting supplies for the house.” Please let this call be good. Please let it be about how they’re going to make it easy for us to buy the place...
“Pretty colours?”
“White and pale lavender and pastel green.” This waiting for why he called is making me only more nervous.
<
br /> “That doesn’t sound like colours you would have chosen yourself...”
Here it goes. “They’re for one of the upstairs bedrooms. Tom’s daughter really needs her own room instead of the back room downstairs. So she got to choose her own colours.” I’m pretty sure that he doesn’t know about Elly yet, just like I didn’t know, and I’ve not told them about it when I was at home for a week, so they wouldn’t have found out from me.
“Tom has a kid?” Yep, that surprised him.
“Yeah. Little three year old girl. She’s Poppy’s, born a few months before she passed.” As I say Poppy’s name, my chest tightens and Tom puts his hand on my knee for a moment, squeezing.
“Ah. Okay. Ehh...” That not only surprised him, but whatever he’d planned to say, he’s no longer sure about his words and I feel bad for what I said, just because I could have done it another way... “Is it okay if your mum and I come by tomorrow? We’d like to talk to all of you at the same time. Talk this over and decide what we’re going to do for the future.”
“Sure.” I nod, already feeling even more nervous. “I’ll also get you some of Grandma’s things, things you’ll probably want to keep, photos and things like that.”
“Thanks.” His voice is quieter still. “I’ll see you all tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.” And Dad disconnects the line.
That definitely didn’t sound like I’m going to like whatever they’ve got to say tomorrow... That definitely sounded like we may have to look for another place to live together. No matter how flippant I was about painting Elly’s room again if we need to find a new place, I don’t actually want to have to find a new place to live. I want to stay in that house, not someplace else.
I don’t want to leave.
12