by Adele Abbott
I’d had an email from Luther, headed ‘Year-end accounts’. The subject line alone was enough to send a shiver down my spine. I was tempted to press ‘delete’, and pretend I’d never seen it, but that was only putting off the inevitable.
I opened the email which read:
Jill
I have prepared provisional accounts for this financial year. I think we need to discuss these as a matter of urgency.
Luther
Maybe he wanted to congratulate me on the stellar year I’d had. Or maybe not.
I hit reply.
Luther
Thanks for the email. Very busy at the moment. Will contact you later to discuss accounts.
Jill
What? Who are you calling an ostrich?
***
I magicked myself over to GT where I’d arranged to meet Blodwyn at my father’s house.
“Come in, Jill.”
“Where’s Dad?”
“He’s still not very happy about me doing this. We had a big argument this morning, and he stormed out.”
“I’m really sorry about that. I’ll totally understand if you want to drop out.”
“Definitely not. This is a good thing you’re doing, and if I can help, I want to. Josh will just have to lump it. How exactly is this going to work?”
“I need you to take this.” I took out the sachet of powder that I’d prepared earlier.
“What’s that for?” She pulled a face.
“It will allow me to track your whereabouts when they transport you over to the human world.”
“I thought I’d be wearing some kind of tracking device.”
“I discussed this with one of my colleagues; she convinced me that the people behind this trade will have the means to check for any conventional tracking device. That’s why I came up with this solution.”
“What is it?”
“The powder is tasteless. I’ve cast a spell on it, so that I’ll be able to track you down.”
“I’m not very good at taking medicine.”
“Just sprinkle it into a glass of water, hold your nose, and knock it straight back.”
“Okay, here goes.” She shut her eyes, and drank it all in one go.
“How was it?”
“Not as bad as I expected.” She released her nose, and opened her eyes. “It won’t make me sick, will it?”
“No, you’ll be fine. There won’t be any after-effects. What time are you due at Ghost Placements?”
“They said to be at their offices by one pm.”
“You’d better get a move on, then. I’ll give it a few hours, and then track you in the human world.”
“What if the powder doesn’t work? I don’t want to be stuck there.”
“Relax, Blodwyn. There’s absolutely nothing to worry about.” I hoped I sounded more confident than I actually felt.
***
After I’d left Blodwyn, I magicked myself back to Washbridge where I was due to have lunch with my darling sister, and my long-lost friend, Lolly Jolly.
Chess was a few doors down from Bar Piranha. Kathy was waiting for me outside.
“You conned me,” I said.
“That’s no way to thank me for buying you lunch.”
“You’d already agreed to meet Lolly, and thought that dragging me along would take some of the pressure off you.”
“That’s a very cynical view.”
“Cynical, but deadly accurate. I know you like the back of my hand.”
“Exactly how well do you know the back of your hand?”
“What?”
“Are you really that familiar with the back of your hand?”
“It’s just a saying, Kathy.”
“I know that, but now you know what it’s like to be on the other side of this kind of madness.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You’re always analysing common sayings.”
“Rubbish. I don’t do that.”
“Don’t you remember that week-long rant you had about something being the best thing since sliced bread?”
Before I could refute Kathy’s unsubstantiated accusation, Lolly appeared. What on earth was she wearing? I’d never seen so many lollipops. They were on her dress, her bag, her shoes and even on the ribbon in her hair.
“Lovely to see you both.” She hugged Kathy and then me. “What’s this place like? Are there any male strippers?”
“It’s Chess, as in the board game. Not chest as in—err—chest.”
“That’s disappointing.” Lolly frowned. “Still, we’ll be able to chat more easily without any distractions.”
Yay! For being able to chat to Lolly.
The place was much more sophisticated than I’d expected: Stylish décor, attentive staff, and classical music. We were seated at a table that was smack bang in the centre of the restaurant.
Halfway through the main course, Lolly put down her knife and fork.
“Do you two remember that song we used to sing?”
“No,” I lied.
Kathy shook her head, but I could tell by her expression that she did.
“You must remember it. We always used to sing it whenever we were together. Now, how did it go?”
“I’m not sure this is the place for—”
“Lolly, Lolly is always jolly.”
I glanced around the room. All eyes were on us. I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me.
“Not Polly, not Molly. Lolly, Lolly. Never sad. Always Jolly.”
The waiter was glaring at us.
“Those were the days, weren’t they, girls?” Lolly was oblivious to the attention she was attracting.
Thankfully, we managed to get through the rest of the meal without a repeat performance of the Lolly Jolly song.
“I guess we should be making a move,” I said.
“Yeah, I have to get back to the shop.” Kathy stood up.
“This has been great!” Lolly beamed. “But there’s one more thing we have to do.”
I didn’t like the sound of that.
“Don’t you remember how much we loved this stuff when we were kids?” She took a small can out of her bag, and before Kathy or I could react, she’d sprayed us both with ‘silly string’.
Lolly was in hysterics. Kathy looked as mortified as I felt.
“Ladies, I’m sorry.” The waiter was stern faced. “This kind of behaviour cannot be tolerated in Chess.”
“Lighten up, misery chops,” Lolly said.
“We were just leaving.” I stood up.
Everyone in the restaurant was staring at us, and tutting.
When we got to the desk, Lolly began to root around inside her handbag. “I’m so sorry, girls. I’m such a pudding brain. I’ve come out without my purse.”
Chapter 20
After Lolly had left us, Kathy reminded me that this was the same trick she’d played on us when we were kids.
“Don’t you remember, Jill?” We’d all go down to the shop for sweets, and when we got there, Lolly would say she’d lost her money.”
“Oh yeah. It’s all coming back to me.”
“I’ve never been so embarrassed as when she started singing.” Kathy cringed. “Did you see all the looks we got?”
“It’s a wonder we didn’t get shown the door there and then.”
“I’m done with her. The next time she calls, I’ll say I’m busy.”
“Me too. I’d better get going.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten. It’s the ‘We’ concert.”
“Oh, right, yeah. I’ll be counting the minutes.”
I waited until Kathy had left, and then cast the spell that would allow me to lock onto Blodwyn. The signal was strong, which meant she wasn’t too far away. After finding a quiet back alley, I magicked myself towards the signal, but just far enough away so that I didn’t land smack bang in the middle of thei
r operation. I didn’t want to scare them away before I knew what they were doing with those hapless souls.
Souls? Get it? Come on—get with the program.
I landed on an area of wasteland. Not far from where I was standing was a building which had once been a factory, but was now close to derelict. Blodwyn’s signal was coming from somewhere inside. Fortunately, all the windows in the building had been boarded up, so I didn’t need to use the ‘invisible’ spell to hide my approach. I’d no sooner reached the building than the gates opened, and a white van came speeding out. The signal, which until then had been static, was now moving away from me. She was obviously inside the van, so I cast the ‘faster’ spell to allow me to keep up with it. I also cast the ‘invisible’ spell because I didn’t want to attract any unwanted attention, as I raced along the road at speeds of up to fifty miles per hour.
The van eventually came to a halt on the village green in West Chipping, where a travelling funfair was being set up. It wasn’t the same one I’d been to in Washbridge, but the rides were very similar. The van came to a halt near to the ghost train. I positioned myself next to the back doors of the van. When the wizard who had been driving it opened the door, several ghosts, who were all visible to me, climbed out. Blodwyn, who had a haunted look on her face, was at the back of the line. As soon as she jumped down from the van, I took hold of her arm. She almost jumped out of her skin because I was still invisible.
“It’s okay,” I whispered. “It’s me. Hang on.”
I magicked us both back to Washbridge city centre where I reversed the ‘invisible’ spell.
“Are you okay, Blodwyn?”
“I don’t know. I think so.”
“What happened?”
“They were taking us to the ghost train. They were going to force us to work there.”
“That explains a lot.”
“What do you mean?”
“I went to a funfair in Washbridge with my sister, Kathy, and her kids. Kathy said the ghosts in the ghost train ride were the most realistic she’d ever seen. There’s little wonder—they’re obviously real ghosts. What I don’t understand, though, is how come you and all the other ghosts are visible to humans. Don’t you have to attach yourself to be seen?”
“Normally, yes, but they’ve developed some kind of weird formula, which they injected us with. It makes us visible to humans, and also stops us going back to Ghost Town.”
“That’s terrible.”
“We have to do something to help the others. There must be hundreds of them around the country.”
Blodwyn was right. All the ghosts who had disappeared must have been sold to funfairs. I had to find a way to liberate them, and get them back to Ghost Town.
“Don’t worry,” I reassured her. “I’ll find a way to rescue them, but first we’d better get you back to GT.”
“How? The injection they gave me won’t allow me to go back. Not for twenty-four hours, at least.”
“Is that how long it lasts?”
“Yes. They said we’d have to be injected every day.”
“Okay. In that case, we need to find a place for you to stay overnight. Tomorrow, when the formula has worn off, we can get you back. I’m afraid I can’t take you home with me—Jack would ask too many questions. You’ll have to stay in my office overnight. Will that be okay?”
“Sure.”
“There’s a sofa in there, but you may have to fight the cat for it.”
***
Jules was in the office by herself.
“Has Lules gone?”
“Yeah. She went to meet her boyfriend, Dilbert.”
“Right. Jules, this is Blodwyn.”
“Hi.” Jules managed a smile, but I could tell she was somewhat shocked by Blodwyn’s appearance.
“Go through to my office, Blodwyn. I’ll be with you in a minute.”
“Is she okay?” Jules asked, when Blodwyn had left us. “She looks terribly pale.”
“She’s fine. She’s just had a bit of a shock.”
“Is she a new client?”
“Client? Yes. That’s who she is.”
“Shall I make her a drink?”
“No—err—we’ve just had one. Look, it’s quiet, why don’t you shoot off home.”
“Already? Are you sure?”
“Yes, off you go.”
“Thanks. Gilbert and I are meeting Lules and Dilbert later, so it will give me more time to get ready.”
“Great. Enjoy your evening.”
Blodwyn was already fast asleep on the sofa.
“Who does she think she is?” Winky had a disgruntled look on his face. “Coming in here, and throwing me off the sofa?”
“She’s had a rough day.”
“Don’t talk to me about rough days. I got a splinter in my paw this morning. It was this long.” He held his paws apart.
“Six inches? Do you think you might be exaggerating a tad?”
“It was at least that long. I was still recuperating when she appeared, and stole my sofa. What’s up with her anyway? She looks like she’s just seen a ghost.”
“She is a ghost. Don’t ask; it’s a long story.”
“How about some salmon to compensate me for the loss of the sofa? And to help me forget about the ordeal of the splinter.”
“Okay then, but only a small helping.”
Blodwyn slept for the best part of two hours, but then sat up with a start.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah, but I’ll be glad when I can get back to GT.”
“I’ll have to leave soon because we’re going to a dinner and dance tonight. Would you like me to order you some food first?”
“I wouldn’t say no to a pizza.”
“Me neither,” Winky chipped in.
I waited until the pizza had been delivered, and then left Blodwyn with the promise that I’d contact my father to let him know that she was safe, and that she would be back home the following day.
***
Before I went home, I decided to check in on the twins. It was the first day of the new drive-thru, and I wanted to see how things were going.
“You got here just in time.” Pearl greeted me. “We’re just about to officially open the drive-thru.”
“Oh? I thought you would have opened first thing this morning.”
“We had planned to, but the stepladder thing wasn’t going to work, so we brought in a joiner to create a small platform for us to stand on. Come and take a look.”
She led the way into the back, where Amber was standing on the wooden platform.
“That looks much better.” I nodded my approval.
“It is.” Amber demonstrated by tapping on the hatch window.
“How exactly are you going to manage the drive-thru?” I asked. “Have you employed more staff to help?”
“There’s no need.” Pearl picked up two headsets from the table, and handed one to Amber. “We can serve in the shop, and take orders from the drive-thru using these.”
“Ready?” Amber asked.
Pearl gave her sister the thumbs up, and Amber opened the hatch. The drive-thru was officially open.
It was something of an anti-climax because there were no customers in the new drive-thru yet, but the twins still seemed upbeat.
“The orders will soon start to flow once word gets around,” Pearl said, as we made our way back to the front of the shop.
I had to admit that the twins certainly looked very high-tech in their headsets.
Pearl was halfway through serving a wizard at the counter when her headset crackled into life. I was very impressed—it had taken less than a minute for their first drive-thru customer to arrive.
Or had it?
“Can I get a taxi at the north side of the market place?” the crackling voice said.
“Please get off this frequency,” Pearl said into the mic.
The headsets crackled into life again.
“What can I get you?” Amber answere
d this time.
“Billy? Can you make a pick-up outside the swimming baths?”
The girls exchanged a worried look.
“What’s going on?” I said. “That sounded like a taxi company.”
“Just teething problems,” Amber reassured me.
“Hello? Can I get a taxi outside the town hall, please?”
Oh dear. It was time to leave them to it.
***
Jack had spent the last hour getting ready.
“You look lovely.” He gave me a peck on the lips.
“Thanks.”
“And?” He looked at me, expectantly.
“And what?”
“How do I look?”
“Very smart. You scrub up well.”
“Did you remember to practise your bossa nova steps, today?”
“Every opportunity I got.”
Jack was determined that we put on a good performance. Me? I was just hoping that there would be plenty of wine to get me through the evening.
***
“Good evening, Jack.” A plump man with a red nose greeted us at the door. “And this must be the beautiful Jill. I’ve heard a lot about you, young lady.”
“This is Sergeant Russell,” Jack said, by way of introduction.
“You can call me Bobby, Jill.”
Bobby the bobby? Seriously? “Nice to meet you, Bobby.”
“I’ve put you on table twenty-three, next to the cloakroom.”
Jack took my hand and we started across the dance floor.
“Ouch!” I stumbled.
“Jill?” Jack managed to catch me before I hit the floor. “Are you okay?”
“I’ve twisted my ankle.” That would teach me to wear such stupidly high heels.
“Can you walk?”
“Just about, but you’ll have to support me.”
We’d only gone a few more steps when Jack stopped dead in his tracks.