“She was very sad, Micah.” I compose myself. “So sad I couldn’t sense anything else from her.”
Micah nods, his face stripped of emotions. “Clean the kitchen. We cook here and eat here, remember?”
“Fuck off.”
“But put her to bed first.”
“Thank you for your permission, mummy.”
I pass him and carry Rive to my bedroom. She mumbles something in her dream as her body rests against the mattress. I cover her with the duvet, kiss her head and rush to the courtyard, urged by the oscillations of my men’s anger spreading in the air like an electric current.
They have gathered in a circle so I join them, their fists raised, chests bare, and feet naked. Sweat and rage mingle in the air, the smell of a battlefield.
We’re not allowed to wipe anybody’s memories away without their permission. My men are going to punish me. That’s fine. I need to release my anger too.
Micah stands opposite me, bouncing on his knees. His arm sweeps and I dodge his fist, but Theo’s foot kicks my ankle. I fall to my knees and Sabrael thrusts his fist into the side of my chest, knocking the air out of my lungs. I sway, huff out and jump to my feet. My body rotates, dodging Zarall’s punch and I sweep my foot, kicking Theo in the abdomen. He bends and steps back as Micah punches me in the face. Blood spurts from my nose. Rage fills my veins. A desperate black rage.
I should get a good beating. I deserve it.
I break Zarall’s nose, knock Theo out, then Sabrael and Micah knock me out. Zarall delivers the final kick in my abdomen. I almost spit out my stomach and freeze. Pain surges through me, pinning me down. The fight is over.
I sit on the ground, my blood splashing against the cobblestones.
“So,” I start, “are we going to have a new leader as well?”
“You’re so fucking self-centred,” Sabrael says. “No wonder this little thing in your bed gets hurt each time you’re close to her. Man, wake up. We respect you. We want to follow you. Stop being an asshole. That’s all.”
His words hit me like a hammer. “I fucked up with Rive.”
“You did,” Micah says. “But it’s nothing irreversible. Just start again. And slowly.”
I’ve fucked up a lot of things. I’ve been haughty during our patrols, bringing danger upon my boys. I’ve broken many of the female hearts. I’ve never had a real goal in life.
I thread my fingers through my hair. “Why are you even trying to help? Fucking hell. We have a conversation like a bunch of pussies. And she’s a fucking mermaid.”
“But angel love must be respected, nurtured and protected,” Micah says. “It doesn’t happen very often.”
The boys pat my shoulder and walk off. Micah is still standing a step away from me though. He lowers to the ground and sits with his knees splayed. Blood dribbles from his nose.
“I’ve been reading,” he says.
“Yeah, you’ve been an avid reader since forever.”
There is a library in one of the four towers, filled with leather bound books and scrolls, Micah’s sanctuary.
“There is a reason why we don’t desire mermaids,” Micah says.
“I fucking know that now. We’d make fucktoys of them all. They’d be our slaves. We’d keep them in harems. We’d hurt them.”
“We would,” Micah says. “But you and Rive it’s something special.”
“I’d fucking die for her. I would, Micah.”
He nods several times. “Beer?”
“A shot of vodka.”
“Sure,” he says as he rises to his feet and grabs my arm, pulling me up.
We go to the great hall, and Micah pours us two shot glasses. We clink them and empty them in one gulp, washing vodka down with coke.
“Do you desire her?” I ask.
“I like her,” Micah says.
“Yeah, I know. But do you want to fuck her?”
Micah laughs. “Go to Rive.”
I salute him and dart to my princess.
Chapter 7
Rive
A command shakes me out of the black void I’ve been floating in. A raspy, threatening command.
“Wake up,” a husky male voice repeats.
I open my eyes to meet Kadmiel’s glance.
“Morning, princess,” he says and sighs as though he’s relieved.
His forehead wrinkles as his jaw muscles twitch.
“Morning, sir.”
“Hungry?”
“Very hungry. And very thirsty.”
There is a black hole in my stomach, demanding food and a desert in my throat, demanding salty water. My muscles ache. My mouth is sore. My neck is sore.
“What do you remember, sweetheart?” Kadmiel’s voice falters as he strokes my hair.
I roll on my side and my glance sweeps over his frame. He’s kneeling beside the bed.
“What do you mean, sir?”
He holds his weight on his elbow resting against the mattress at my shoulder. I notice bruising on his face and a few greys marking his hair. Dread surges through me. No, not dread. An overwhelming sense of worry that feels like dread. I’m drowning in worry for Kadmiel.
“Sir, what happened to you? Another demon? You look like shit.” I freeze. My heart stops beating. I didn’t just say that. “Sir, what happened?” My speech stutters as I watch him carefully, expecting his hand to twist my neck at any moment. “A demon, right?”
“Yeah, another demon.” He winces as though he’s in pain as something jabs my heart. “What do you remember? Your sister?”
He doesn’t look like he wants to kill me so I exhale with relief. “Yes. We visited my sister and then... then...”
“What then?”
“Then it’s black. Did I drink alcohol?”
“Yeah, you got drunk with just two sips and passed out.” He winces again, his hand guarding the side of his chest.
I sit on the bed, cross-legged. “I told you mermaids couldn’t drink alcohol.”
Did I just tell him off? I flinch in shame. Bad mermaid. So bad that the angel sitting in front of her may want to punish her.
“Yeah, you told me.” Kadmiel sighs, exhaustion sharpening his pale face.
An urge blasts inside of me. An urge of comforting him, an urge of taking away that exhaustion from him. An urge of taking away the grey sadness I can sense from him.
I lean towards him and wrap my arms around his neck, pulling his head down to my chest. “Did I behave well?”
“Yes.” His breath brushes my skin and I realise I have no clothes on.
“I didn’t lure that demon to you or something?”
“No, Rive, everything is fine.”
I kiss the top of his head then peck his cheek.
Kadmiel stiffens in my embrace then he separates himself from me and it feels like something precious to me has been taken away from me. A wave of embarrassment floods me.
“I’m sorry, sir,” I say.
He flashes me a half-smile. “Everything is fine, princess. Eat something.”
He rises to his feet and rummages around the room to find a set of underwear and a dress for me. I pull them on and go to pee and brush my teeth then sit at the table. Kadmiel sits opposite me.
Something is clearly troubling him.
I’m his pet and I’m not allowed to ask him any personal questions, but my job is to make him feel better. And that’s what I’m going to do.
Kadmiel
She doesn’t remember our intimate moment. I don’t know whether it’s good or bad. All I know is that from now on, I’m going to take care of her properly. I won’t hurt her again.
She wolfs down her meal and washes it down with a glass of salty water.
I take her out for a walk along the beach that stretches below my castle. Ash clouds layer the sky and a cold breeze brushes my face.
Rive holds my hand and walks beside me, our arms touching.
“I like it here,” she says.
“We can come here every day.”
“I’d love to.”
“Whatever makes you happy, princess.”
I stop and sit on the white sand, my folded legs splayed. Surprisingly, Rive settles herself within my body, her back against my chest.
It feels good.
No—
It feels amazing like we’re one body and one soul.
“Sir, you’re worried.”
Fuck. How can she even sense me?
“I just want you to feel safe and happy, Rive. That’s my only concern.”
She turns to me, sitting on her heels, and her lips brush against my cheek. She threads her fingers through my hair.
“Do you want to go out tonight?” I ask.
A bright smile crosses her face. “I’d love to.”
“I know a nice place where you can have fun.”
She cups my face in both her hands and squeals quietly. “I can’t wait.” She curls into my chest and emits quiet squeals that soothe my broken heart like a balm.
I’m holding her in my embrace for a few minutes then we stand up and go back to the castle.
Rive
I have a shower and put a black dress on. It is the lace up back dress and the hem is very short, barely covering my ass. I slide my feet into black heels and look in the mirror hanging next to the bathroom door.
Kadmiel moves closer to me and stands right behind me, laying his hands on my shoulders. He looks so handsome in his white shirt and black trousers. I can’t believe that an angel is taking me out like I’m a human girl. Excitement clouds my mind and my heart pounds in my chest.
“Is the dress okay?” I ask anxiously. “How do I look?”
I freeze. I did it. I asked an angel a question I should have never asked them.
“You’re a hot mermaid,” Kadmiel says.
Pain courses through my chest. He is nice. He is nice because he doesn’t want to offend me with his true opinion on my looks.
A thought stirs in my head. What is the true reason for his care over me? Is he having fun? If he is-well, that’s a bit cruel to have fun like this. It’s cruel to lie to another person for fun.
I kill my horrible thoughts.
He is an angel. I shouldn’t question his motives. I should obey.
A flutter goes through my chest. He will meet a lot of human women tonight and he’ll leave me to fuck them. Something jabs my chest. I think I’m jealous. I shouldn’t be jealous. It’s inappropriate. No, it’s forbidden for me.
I’m Kadmiel’s pet and he’s a very caring owner. That’s all I can expect from him. My feelings are unnatural and should be incinerated.
I’m kind of getting used to being his pet. Pets don’t like being abandoned, I guess. This is the reason for my absurd emotions.
Then another flutter courses through me as he spreads his wings. I hate those means of travelling.
“Don’t be a coward,” Kadmiel says and smirks at me.
“I’m not a coward, sir. I just don’t want to throw up over your chest.”
Well, it seems like I’m a very rude pet who should learn how to bite her tongue.
Kadmiel kisses the top of my head as though my boldness has amused him. His arms wrap around me and his wings cover my vision as a grey fog fills my mind and nausea follows.
As I steady myself and take a few deep breaths, Kadmiel hides his wings and holds my hand, pulling me behind him. We walk along the facades of historic buildings, my heels clicking against the asphalt pavement. The warm night’s air envelops me like a cloud of sweet temptation. Stars twinkle in the navy sky. Cars hum somewhere in the distance and the echoes of human laughter come to my ears. We pass a pub filled with music and people then enter a park. A stone fountain rises in front of us. Four flower urns form its corners and a stone wall reaching up to the ankle encircles it. Two couples are sitting around the fountain. They’re kissing and hugging.
Kadmiel squeezes my hand. “Nice, isn’t it?”
“Very nice.”
“Men stare at you, Rive.” There is a hint of anger in his voice.
I’m speechless. He squeezes my hand with more strength, causing me pain.
“I will make them not stare at me, sir.”
I don’t know how to achieve my goal, but I’m a resourceful mermaid. Whatever pleases my angel master. Maybe I could ask every man politely not to stare at me. No, I can stick my tongue out and show them my middle finger.
“Just be careful, Rive. Some men are bad.”
“I know.”
I’m not stupid. I can take care of myself.
Kadmiel pulls forward and I almost run behind him.
Kadmiel
We enter the club and the smell of sweat and human desire whips my nostrils. Hormones sizzle in the air, mingling with the darkness and filth of human thoughts.
I can hear two couples fucking in the bathroom at the farther end of the pub-my perfect hearing never disappoints me.
Rive clings to me and I focus on her. I elbow my way towards the bar and set her on the bar stool. She turns her head in every direction like a curious lemur. She’s adorable. I want to show her all the wonders of the world.
The music pulsates as does my desire for her. I want to kiss her, touch her. Fuck her.
“What do you want to drink?” I say into her ear, inhaling her tantalising musk.
So fucking close. So fucking far away.
“Water,” she says as her eyes sweep over the bottles behind the counter.
A man drops onto the bar stool at her other side. My glance shifts to his.
What a fucking bad luck. He’s Rive’s first love, Ethan.
She turns to him, her hands rising. I hear her quiet squeal then I eavesdrop on their conversation as the bartender takes my order.
“Ethan,” Rive shrieks as her heart races with excitement.
“What a pleasant surprise,” Ethan says. “Nice to see you again.”
“Nice to see you too,” Rive says.
I sense her joy of being with an equal.
“I’m sorry I didn’t come to the pub,” she says.
“Don’t be,” Ethan says. “You’re here and that’s all that matters.”
He’s good. His words make her feel like she’s a human princess. I hate him. I really do. I hate him because Rive is herself around him.
What the fuck am I doing wrong? She’s still treating me like her authority. I fucking don’t want to be her authority. I want to be her shelter, her comfort, the one and only dick fucking her. I’d be faithful to her. I fucking want to be faithful to her.
“Do you want to dance?” Ethan asks.
“I’d love to,” Rive says.
An urge of murder boils inside of me and I can barely manage to restrain it. I can picture Ethan without his head attached to the neck in my mind.
Ethan grabs Rive’s hand, pulling her towards the dance floor. The thought of his hand touching hers evokes pure black rage inside of me. I hold my glass of beer and Rive’s glass of water and search for a table by the dance floor. Ethan and Rive mix with the sweaty bodies gyrating under the LED ceiling dispersing the light of all shades of purple. I drop into a black antique sofa and watch them. Rive moves her hips, encircling Ethan’s neck with her arms as the music deafens me and fills me with fever. Then ruthless coldness rushes through my veins as I sense Rive’s happiness. I will kill that dick. I will kill him the moment the dance ends.
Rive’s heart races like she’s a startled bird. But, fuck me, she can dance. Watching her is like watching a dance performance. Her movements are graceful like those of a professional ballerina, full of heat as though she has taken Latin dance classes her whole life. Ethan stops and watches her too, stunned, hungry for her. Rive twirls around him, bounces off other people and laughs.
I focus and dig deeper into Ethan’s mind. He’s a computer programmer and has a big house. He also has a fiancée and cheats on her regularly. Right. That’s all I need to know. I won’t let that dick hurt Rive. I will kill him if he as much as thinks ab
out laying his hands on Rive.
My glance meets Rive’s and I gesture for her to come back to our table. I can sense her disappointment as she says her timid sorry to Ethan and saunters towards me, dropping into the sofa beside me. I kiss her cheek as Ethan shoots me a dark glance and walks off in the opposite direction.
“Did I do something wrong, sir?” Rive asks, leaning towards me.
“No, princess, but you’re tired. We should go back home.” I hand the glass of water to her.
“Sir—“
“Kadmiel,” I growl. “Call me Kadmiel. I fucking hate it when you call me a sir.”
She shudders. “Sorry. So sorry.”
I throw my arm over her upper back, pulling her to me. “I’m sorry.” I kiss her temple. “Are you having fun?”
She inhales deeply. “I like dancing.”
“I noticed. You’re a very good dancer.”
“Dance with me, Kadmiel.”
Her bold invitation hits me like an axe. “Angels don’t dance.”
“Why not? It’s fun.”
I don’t fucking know why angels don’t dance. I never needed that, but now looking into Rive’s pleading eyes I can’t find any reason why I shouldn’t dance with her.
“Please, dance with me.” Rive rubs her cheek against mine then cups my face in both her hands and rests her forehead against mine. “Dance with me.”
I inhale her and cherish the moment.
“Dance with me,” Rive repeats, but it sounds like an order.
Well, I can’t let her wait any longer.
I hold her hand and rise to my feet, pulling her behind towards the dance floor. The music is nice actually, now slower, perfect for a romantic dance.
Rive clings to me, her arms around my chest, her eyes glancing up. “Angels don’t dance because they can’t dance.”
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