I stop at a gas station and take my time to fill the tank and make my way inside. I go to the bathroom, struggle a bit in the small cubicle with my crutches but I still manage. I get a coffee and a couple of snacks for the road and make my way to the cashier, he scans all my stuff, packs them for me and hands me my bag. I pay him and hop out with my bag and two crutches, struggling a bit.
I look in the backseat – thank you Urban Legend for freaking me out! – put my crutches and most of the snacks in the back except the bag of cheese chips and my coffee. I get back behind the wheel and start the rest of my journey to the cabin, singing along to the radio. I’m glad it’s only a two hour drive because my knee is killing me. Driving while being injured was probably not the best idea ever but it’s too late now.
I make my way down the last bit of road that leads to the cabin and enjoy the view. Miles and miles of water along the road, the fresh and salty scent of the ocean is tickling my nose. I enjoy this feeling. It’s still pretty early in the day. It’s very sunny and just gorgeous weather for this time of the year.
I’m surprised I still haven’t had any call or text from him. Either he’s too pissed at me and doesn’t want to talk to me or he’s too pissed and in a couple of hours he’ll be knocking at the door and yelling his head off... or he knew it all along and he’s giving me some time. I hope it’s the latter. I smile to myself thinking about Anthony, kind of wishing he was here with me and we could enjoy a couple of days away from everything but I need this time to myself.
Either way, he is going to be so mad at me for bailing on him and not being there but I just can’t deal with him right now. I do love him and need him in my life. It’s just hard for me knowing he saw what was about to happen. I’m glad he stopped it but still it must have done a number on him. I know sooner rather than later we’re going to have to have the talk he mentioned last night, I’m just not ready yet.
I smile seeing the cabin. So many good memories come back to my mind instantly seeing the old and rusty swing still in the back of the cabin, the small hot tub that probably doesn’t work. The time I spent in it with Ant just talking until the early hours of the morning is a fond memory.
I park the car at the side of the cabin and get out carefully. I get my stuff out and hop over to the door, unlocking it. I’m glad they never sold the place.
I just got to the cabin and I’m lying on the couch, trying to sort out my thoughts when my phone chirps.
Anthony: Remember what I told you Sweet Cheeks? If you weren’t there when I got to your house this morning I would spank your sweet ass a delicious shade of red? It will happen. I promise!
Oh shit I’m in trouble. I knew he wasn’t messing around when he said I had to be there but I didn’t know he meant to carry out his spanking threat.
Me: I just need a couple of days to myself to clear my mind. I know I lied to you and I’m sorry but I had to, you wouldn’t have let me come over.
Anthony: You’re right, I wouldn’t have.
Me: See, I didn’t have any other choice.
Anthony: I know, just be careful please and if you need anything please call me.
Me: Why are you being so understanding? It’s so not like you!
I was waiting for his text when my phone started to ring and I literally jumped in the air, thankfully I was lying down. I pick up instantly seeing it’s him.
“Because I’ve known all along that you were there Sweet Cheeks. I know it’s your one happy place. It seems like I know you more than you think.” His deep warm and sexy voice warms my heart. He does know me very well.
“It does look like it.” I sigh. “I’m sorry I lied to you.”
“I understand, don’t like it but I understand. You need your time. I just wish you could do that where I could get to you within a few minutes and not a couple of hours.” I hear him sigh.
“I know, but as you said, it’s my one happy place. I only have good memories here. It’s still the same as it was before, well except the swing is all rusty and falling apart.” I smile softly remembering when we both went on it at the same time and the wood plank broke.
“That’s such a shame, even though my ass is still sore from the day we both went on it.” I can hear the smile in his voice.
“I was just thinking the same thing.”
“I miss you and I can’t wait to see you when you get back.”
“I miss you too and I can’t wait either.” I’m a little bit disappointed that he didn’t show up unannounced. I probably would have been pissed at him and we probably would have ended up fighting, but it still would have been sweet.
“I’m going to let you get back to what you were doing before I interrupted you.” I can hear the smile in his voice but also his seriousness.
“Thanks. I’ll let you know when I get back into town.”
“Okay Sweet Cheeks. Talk to you later. Love you.” He says in his sensual voice and I just melt to the ground.
“Love you too, bye.” I hang up before I tell him to just come over.
Chapter 32
Anthony
I barely slept last night, with the events of the day before. I was either tossing and turning or having images of Michael naked over Ayden. Fucked up nightmare reflecting our fucked up reality.
I drive to Ayd’s house and park in the driveway. I chuckle to myself seeing her car isn’t in her driveway.
I walk to the door and ring the doorbell. No answer. I knew it!
I take my key out and let myself in the house. Looking around and calling her name but of course she’s not here.
Fucking Ayden!
I knew it. I knew she would take off the first chance she got! I trusted her and wanted to give her what she asked for but she took off!
She amuses me as much as she pisses me off. That’s probably why I love her so much.
I decide to entertain her and pick up my phone, texting her at first but not able to resist calling her.
It’s good to hear her. She doesn’t seem too upset which is good. I can’t help feeling like I need to be with her.
She seemed quite disappointed when I told her I’d see her later. Maybe she wants me to go to her? I don’t know but either way, I’m going to her.
I need her.
I need to make sure she is okay.
Just before I head out, I see a note on the kitchen counter. I walk to it and pick it up.
My amazing Big Man,
(Well most of the time)
Sorry I’m not here. I knew you would let yourself in so I figured I’d leave you a little message.
I’m not doing what I did years ago. I really just need a day or two to myself. It’s been a lot to take in what happened and what almost happened.
Finally getting answers to all the questions I’ve had all those years was quite unsettling and is messing with my head.
I just need a couple of days to process it all.
I hope you can understand and find it in your heart to forgive me.
Know that I love you with all my heart and I’m not doing this to piss you off. (Well maybe a little but it wouldn’t be the same if I wasn’t now would it?)
I’ll see you in a couple of days.
I love you,
Ayden
xxxxx
I can’t believe her. She manages to be a smartass even in notes. I smile to myself and fold the note, putting it in my wallet and walk out of the house, locking up then I get on my bike.
I drive the long way to her parent’s cabin.
I know she is there. That’s her happy place on earth.
Quite a long drive but it’s so worth it to be with her.
I can’t help but think back on all we’ve been through. From what happened years ago to just yesterday.
She’s such a strong woman. Who would survive getting kidnapped and raped for days and go through it again—this time minus the rape?
I’m proud of her for standing her ground and getting the answers she needed. I wish I wa
s the one to pull the trigger but she needed to do it to close that part of her life. Even if I think it’s going to mess with her head—I need to keep an eye on her and make sure she is okay.
I hope she will be able to let go of what happened.
As selfish as it is, I can’t risk losing her again.
Chapter 33
Ayden
I go through the cabin just looking around and checking the pictures that are displayed on the walls and I suddenly remember we have a box full of pictures of Ant and I from when we were younger and so I go on the hunt for it. It takes me a while but I manage to find it in the small office. I push it across the floor over to the L shaped couch.
I go to the kitchen, make myself a peanut butter sandwich, grab a glass of milk and sit down on the couch and put the TV on a cartoon channel just for some background noise. I take a bite of my sandwich and put the box on the couch next to me. I start to look through the pictures and can’t help the grin that’s plastered on my face at seeing all of my childhood memories in one box.
The first picture that catches my eye is one of Ant and I when we were probably five or six years old. He was on his bicycle and there was a small trailer on the back that was attached to it and I would always sit in it and he would just ride around the cabin and down the road with one of our parents making sure we were okay and not getting into any trouble. As usual we always ended up in trouble anyway, even if they were watching us.
I keep looking through the pictures and another one grabs my attention. I remember this particular day, it was winter formal. Now Anthony is not the kind of guy who would dress up and go to that kind of event but I was shocked that he asked me to go with him! I was sixteen in the picture and he was seventeen. I remember that day as if it happened yesterday. He was in his black tuxedo and I was wearing a knee length blood red dress that had a corset top with black accents. It was amazing,
“Ayden! Anthony is here!” I hear my mom yell and I can’t help the squeal that escapes me and the little bounce and fast clapping I do. I’ve been head over heels for Anthony for as long as I can remember. Well, I only realized I loved him the past couple of months but yeah I’ve known him forever so I can’t really say when I fell in love with him. But tonight is going to be perfect. He asked me to be his date for winter formal when they started to hang up posters for it and everything. I know he hates that kind of things, but he knew I wanted to go and he asked me and it was the sweetest thing ever. He hid clues in my notebooks and in my locker and all of them were creating a charade saying – Will you go to winter formal with me? It was the most original and sweetest thing ever.
“Coming!” I yell back and check my make-up and hair one last time and make sure everything is perfect before I go downstairs. I pray to God I won’t fall over or trip coming down the stairs. It might be Anthony who’s seen me at my worst but tonight I want him to see me at my best. I manage to get to the second to last step before tripping over my own foot, but always the gentleman, Anthony catches me and holds me close to his body.
“Hey there, be careful Sweet Cheeks.” He whispers and places a kiss on my cheek. “You look beautiful.” He smiles at me and I just blush... hard!
“T-thanks you look amazing yourself.” I manage to stammer just a bit and turn to my dad who has his camera ready. He takes a ton of pictures of us. I can’t help but smile through them all, hoping they will be amazing. I’m not sure how much dancing or fun we will have as it’s not his thing but at least I’ll have the pictures to remember this amazing night.
I smile seeing my favorite picture from the winter formal official pictures. I’m standing in front of Anthony. He has his arms wrapped around me with his hands resting on my stomach and I have my hands over his. We’re both are smiling wide and just look happy. That night was crazy.
We stayed at the formal for a whole thirty minutes! It was boring as fuck and not at all what I expected. We ended up going to our favorite Chinese restaurant and then to our favorite spot in the park to just hang out there in the back of his truck. We ended up talking way longer than any of us expected and when we realized how late it was, it was an hour past my curfew.
Needless to say my dad wasn’t too happy when he brought me home and we told him what happened. Good thing my dad really liked Ant so he didn’t give him too much of a telling off. What annoyed him the most was that I didn’t bother picking up my phone, which would have been impossible as I left it in my room by accident. I was grounded for a week but it was worth it!
I’ve been at the cabin since this morning and while I love it here when my family is around, it’s creepy, and lonely, and boring when you’re on your own. I’m lost in my thoughts and rehashing what happened yesterday is all I can do and it’s driving me insane.
I did manage to think about my life and how things could have been if things hadn’t happened and I’m not sure they would have been how I wanted them to be. Ant and I would maybe have gotten serious although it could have ended quickly with how committed to the club he was. Maybe I wouldn’t have wanted that kind of life with him or it would have stopped him from joining the MC and we would have had our two story house with a white picket fence, a dog, two kids and be happy forever or get bored after a while and divorced.
All the questions that used to drive me nuts in the past are now just pointless. With all of those what if’s I was making myself even more miserable. Now that I finally realized that, I think I will be able to face him and go have a talk with him. Maybe in a day or two. I just came to that conclusion so let’s not just jump too quickly into it.
I’m brought back to reality when I hear a motorcycle engine roar, and I immediately know who it is. So much for delaying the talk we need to have. I walk to the door with one crutch. I just can’t handle the two, might not be the best for the healing process but it’s better than me falling flat on my face trying to use both of them.
I open the door and lean on the doorframe just as he parks his bike by my car. He smirks looking at me and takes his time to get off of his bike. He takes off his glasses and his helmet and swaggers towards me. I swear the man is pure hotness no matter what he does—even just walking the couple of steps it takes to get to the front door. He’s wearing old jeans, boots, an old shirt that has some holes in the shoulders and his flannel shirt.
“Anthony.” I say with my arms crossed over my chest.
“Sweet Cheeks.” He grins and kisses my forehead softly, giving me a gentle neck squeeze and steps into the cabin. I don’t know how I’m going to manage this talk but I don’t really have much choice.
“Fancy seeing you here.” I grin at him and he chuckles, getting a beer from the fridge he sits on the couch resting his feet on the coffee table. “By all means, make yourself at home.” I raise my eyebrow.
“Sweet Cheeks, you know as well as I do that we both are home. This is where it all began.” He grins, winks at me, and takes a long pull of his beer and sets it on the table. “Are you going to come sit with me or just stand there?” I roll my eyes and walk to him as best as I can and sit down on the single chair opposite him. “Seriously? Are you that scared of me or what?” He’s getting frustrated already. This is going to be interesting. I sigh and get closer to him.
“Happy?” I raise one eyebrow.
“Not quite.” He grabs my right ankle and drags me to him, causing me to squeal and end up half under him. “Now I’m happy.” He grins and kisses my head.
“Well I’m not you heavy fucker!” I narrow my eyes and try to push him off of me but let’s face it. He has a good foot in height and hundred pounds on me, there is no way in hell that I could make him move off of me. And the fucker even has the nerve to laugh!
“Now, now, don't be so mean Sweet Cheeks.” He grins clearly not offended and maneuvers us so that we are both sitting facing each other, my legs resting on top of his with his thumb drawing random patterns over my bare thigh. “How’s the knee?” He asks concerned.
“It could be worse.
It’s more dangerous for me to use both crutches than the one. Yeah I nearly fell flat on my face a couple of time.” I shrug.
“That’s good. How is your soul searching going?” He smiles softly never breaking eye contact.
“I, uh, it went well I think? It’s not like you gave me much time for it but I came to the realization that all of the what if’s I was torturing myself with were getting me nowhere and were just driving me even more crazy than I already am.” I glare at him as he was going to point out the fact that I just admitted that I was crazy and he chuckles. “Sucks it took me so long to come to that conclusion but glad I was able to make it on my own.” He nods.
“That’s good. I’m glad you were able to realize that.” He points out squeezing my good knee. “How do you feel about what happened yesterday?” He asks softly.
“That’s an excellent question.” I sigh softly.
“I know.”
“Cocky bastard.” I grin softly.
“I know that too.” He kisses my head. “Did you mean what you said to Michael, about how you felt for me.”
“Yes, I meant everything I said. About how much I loved you and that you were the only one I ever loved and will ever love. And yes also about the fact that us making love was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever experienced. I felt like it was finally bringing us full circle if it makes any sense. Like we needed to make love to make it real between us. Not that it wasn’t real before but you know what I mean.” I mutter the end not knowing how to express my feelings.
Saving Ayden Page 21