by Lynn Rider
His eyes meet mine but I look away, not wanting him to ask. I’m not ready.
“We’re here,” Drew announces as the car slows.
“The needle?” I ask excitedly.
“Yep, it’s the best way to see the city. From here you can fully appreciate how beautiful Seattle is. I’ll show you what I know and you can pick what you want to do next time,” he says, bringing my excitement level up another notch.
Not waiting for him to open my door, I jump from my seat and meet him near the front of the car.
“Anxious?”
“Hell yeah. This has been on my to-do list since I requested the transfer.” I ignore the brief look of confusion on his face as my head tilts back to follow the height of the needle.
“Good, let’s do it!” he says, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the parking lot.
“Oh my god!” I call out when we reach the top. Drew lets go of my hand for the first time since taking it near the car. I walk in awe around the concrete barrier wall, taking in the panoramic view as he watches me silently. “Thank you. I’ve wanted to come here but probably wouldn’t have.”
“You’re welcome. Let me show you.” He takes my hand again and leads me to the edge. “That’s downtown, and over there is the waterfront.”
As I walk around the deck several times, he points out things that I wouldn’t know and wouldn’t have noticed without him. As the sun begins to set, he leads me to the west side of the deck. Drew positions my body in front of his and wraps his arms around my shoulders, shielding my body from the chill in the air.
His embrace is strong, reliable, and for a little while I pretend it’s Austin standing here holding me. I swallow the lump and force myself to snap into the present and not the past that continues to haunt me. I rest my head back against Drew’s firm chest and silently watch the sun fall into Puget Sound.
“What are you doing here?” I ask nervously as I answer the door in a towel. His beautiful eyes darken as they scan the length of my body. He steps into my apartment, shutting the door behind him without care as to the intensity of the slam. I step backward as he steps forward. With each step, I anticipate his touch, the feel of his hands, his mouth. I’m on the edge with need so I stop moving, allowing him to catch me.
He stops, and with a heady stare he looks down at me before lifting his large hand into my hair and intertwining his fingers near the root. He pulls my face up to meet his, and our eyes connect for the briefest of seconds before he lowers his mouth to mine. He kisses me vigorously before sliding his mouth down the ridge of my jaw and onto my collarbone. His free arm wraps around my waist catching me as my towel drops when my knees buckle.
His hand frees my hair and slides down my neck to my exposed breast. He massages the flesh roughly, lifting it as his mouth lowers. With soft nips and kisses he has me moaning with desire.
“I want you, Amber,” he says huskily while scooping me from my feet and carrying me to the couch.
He strips from his tee and shorts, his rigid cock springing free, and I subconsciously bite my lip in anticipation. He lowers over me once again and presses into my body. I hear my own deep inhale as he begins moving.
“Oh my god. Don’t stop,” I breathe as his long fluid strokes fill me completely. I tilt my hips, meeting each of his thrusts, building our rhythm. I tighten around him with each plunge into my body and the blissful sensation sends me over the top.
The room fills with a moan as my orgasm rips deep from within my body. “Drew!”
My eyes fly open and my heart beats wildly as I shift in my bed, feeling the warmth between my legs. My head rolls to the clock.
3:33am.
“Fuck!” I whisper into my empty room.
“Good morning!” Rob singsongs as I walk into the lobby.
“Good morning,” I deadpan with a wry look.
“Oh, someone didn’t have a good night,” he replies, scanning me with his eyes. “Everything okay?” his voice softens as he looks at my belly.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just didn’t sleep well.”
“Well, if it were anyone else, I’d want the juicy details, but you’re with child… how juicy can they be?” He grins.
“Rob even if I had a sex life, which I hope to have again someday, I wouldn’t share the details. I’m not a kiss and tell kind of girl,” I say sweetly, batting my eyes at him.
“You can’t blame me for trying. One day you’re going to crack and tell me all those dark secrets you keep locked up in there,” he says, pointing to my head while laughing.
“Nah, that’s my—”
I stop mid sentence when I see Rob’s eyes drift over my shoulder, silencing his laugh.
I turn, following his gaze and see what’s capturing his attention. His large, muscular frame has my mouth watering at the sight. He’s wearing gym pants and a tight, athletic, long-sleeved shirt that molds to his rigid chest and coiled stomach. Flashbacks of my dream last night stream through my mind, causing a flush of heat over my body.
“Good morning,” his deep voice calls as he crosses the lobby.
I push my naughty visions aside. “Good morning. What are you doing here?” I ask quietly, trying to hide the heat that’s taken over my body as he stops in front of me.
“You left your jacket in the car last night,” he hands me the jacket I hadn’t noticed he was carrying, “and I’m flying back to LA this morning. Introduce me to your friend,” he says, nodding his chin toward Rob. I turn to see the mystified look in Rob’s eyes.
“He’s gay,” I mumble to myself, seeing it for the first time.
“What?” Drew asks.
“Nothing.” I smile, pushing my revelation aside and leading him to Rob. “Rob, this is—”
“Drew Merritt, good to meet you.” Drew interrupts with an authority in his voice.
“Rob Ott, good to meet you.” He grins devilishly as he puts his daintier hand in Drew’s free hand and shakes. He raises an eyebrow briefly at me before setting his eyes back on Drew.
“Amber tells me you’re a lot of fun to work with,” Drew says.
“Yeah, we try. Especially when the asshole isn’t here,” he says quietly, looking around.
Drew looks at me. “Mr. Yelverton,” I clarify. Drew nods slowly with a smile.
The phone rings and Rob hesitantly pulls his eyes from Drew to answer it.
“You have time for coffee?” he asks, turning my direction.
“Always.” He smiles with my reply before extending his arm for me to lead the way to the hotel restaurant.
“So this is unexpected,” I say as I slide into the seat opposite him.
“I was in the neighborhood.” He shrugs.
“Another gym near here?”
“Yep, around the corner. When you have that baby, you can use it if you want.”
“Are you saying I’m fat?” I joke.
“Not at all.” His eyes scan my legs that extend from the side of table appreciatively.
“If I didn’t know how squeamish you are about pregnant women, I would think you were just checking me out,” I tease.
He smirks playfully. “Squeamish, huh? Is that how you see it?”
“I know it makes you uncomfortable to hear the details.”
“Yeah, the story about a day of marathon vomiting wasn’t your best.” He laughs bringing a sparkle to his eyes. I study them for a minute longer than I should.
“Thank you for taking me yesterday. No other sunset will ever compare to that one,” I say appreciatively.
“I told you it’s the best way to see Seattle. Next stop, that Ferris wheel,” he says with a smile. He looks to his watch. “I need to get going.” He stands, holding out his hand out to help me from my seat.
“Thank you. You make me feel bigger than I am,” I tease, placing my hand in his.
“I wasn’t insinuating that you’re big. I just wanted to hold your hand again.” He flashes me a cocky grin and I narrow my eyes, not knowing if he’s joking or not
. “I’ll see you next time,” he says quietly, leaning in and kissing my cheek.
I watch as he walks through the lobby, giving Rob a casual wave on the way by.
“I was wrong. That’s a juicy detail I want to know all about,” Rob says as he joins me in watching Drew walk out of the hotel into the early morning light.
Amber…
‘You sure you don’t want someone to go with you?’
I read the text from Emma over and over. I don’t want to go alone, but I’m not letting her take a day off work to go with me.
‘No, I’ll be fine. It’s a good visit. I’m not scared at all,’
I reply after ten minutes of debate.
‘Okay. Heading to work. Text me!’
I put the phone on the nightstand as the lump starts to form. I’m thankful that I have Emma and that I’ve found a friend in Reeder, and even Drew when he’s in town, but I can’t stop thinking about those I left behind. I don’t know that I fully understand my actions, and I’m not sure I’m making any of the right ones. Some days it feels like it will be okay, others I feel like I’m swimming against the current.
As I glance across the room at my laptop, I’m haunted by the email from Austin that sits unread in my inbox. He sent it almost three months ago, when I first left New York. I’ve stayed strong and avoided it, but today it feels like it’s calling me. He’s supposed to be here with me, sharing in this day and all those that will come after it. I rub my belly and feel a faint flutter knocking the sorrow from my face and putting a smile there.
“You and me against the world, little one,” I say quietly as I rub my hands around the mound of belly.
“Hey.” A deep voice startles me as I’m locking my front door. I turn and see Drew holding a duffle bag.
“Hi, are you here for the weekend?”
“Are you okay?” he asks, searching my face. I look down, trying to hide the effects that crying always has on my fair skin.
“Amber?” His tone is stern and he drops his bag on the concrete, stepping closer, tucking his hand under my chin and lifting my face so I meet his eyes. “What’s the matter?” he asks before drawing me tightly against his body.
My emotions almost get the best of me, but I bite them back and softly push from his comforting embrace. I smile up at him, trying to reassure him that I’m okay.
“It’s going to be okay,” he says softly, brushing my hair back.
I give a weak nod. “I have to go. I’m going to be late.”
“Where are you going?” he asks, not letting me go.
“I have a doctor’s appointment. I find out if I’m having a boy or a girl today.” A strangled sob follows my words as my overwhelming need for Austin stabs my heart again.
“I’m going with you. Give me a minute,” he says, lowering his gaze to mine as he looks for approval. I nod again, unable to speak. He steps away, unlocking Emma and Reeder’s front door and tossing his bag inside before locking it again.
“Let’s go,” he says as he wraps his arm around my shoulders.
I check in while Drew finds a seat in the crowded waiting room. His tense expression only softens momentarily when I sit beside him. From the corner of my eye, I see him anxiously looking around at all the pregnant women.
“Relax, Drew. They won’t bite,” I whisper softly. His leg bounces up and down before I put my hand on his thigh, stilling his movement. “Are you okay? You can go home if you want. I’ll be okay.”
“No, I told you I was coming with you. I’m here.”
“You don’t have to go back there.”
He looks over at me. “Do you want me to stay out here?”
“I want you to do what you’re comfortable with. It’s all right if you’re not okay to do this. This place is obviously making you nervous.”
“Oh no, I’m going back there. I want to see this.” He offers a tight, uncomfortable smile.
“Thank you for bringing me.
“Anytime, Amber.” He wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer.
An older woman sits down in the chair opposite from us. Her eyes scan my smaller frame wrapped in Drew’s large, beefy arms. “First baby?”
I begin to speak, but Drew cuts me off. “Yes, can you tell?” he asks sheepishly.
“Yes, but don’t you worry. You’ll figure it out.” Her face softens into a kind smile.
I look up at Drew in wonderment. “I don’t want her judging you,” he whispers in my ear, bringing a smile to my face.
“Amber West.” I hear the nurse call out at the door. My heart starts beating rapidly against the inside of my chest as we stand and I squeeze Drew’s hand, getting his attention. “Are you sure?” I ask quietly.
“I’m sure if you’re willing to share this moment with a friend?”
I smile wide and pull him through the door. I see the nurse glance back several times. She’s trying to appear as if she’s making sure we’re following, but her gaze lands on Drew every time. I squeeze his hand again and nod in the direction of her ass as she walks. He wraps his arm around me, pulling me under the crook of his arm.
“Do you honestly think I’m here to pick up women?” he says sarcastically as soon as the nurse leaves us alone in the exam room.
“She was cute.”
“Not as cute as you.”
“Good morning, Miss West. How are—”
The ultrasound technician’s words drop when she sees Drew step from the dimly lit corner and, for first time today, I notice how sexy he, his crisp, white, button-down shirt rolled up on his forearms, and fitted jeans that show off his muscular thighs.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he says apologetically. I laugh softly as I lay back on the table.
“It’s okay. I just wasn’t expecting anyone else in here,” she lies.
Drew nods, accepting her answer as he steps to the edge of the bed and takes my hand in his.
“Well, you ready to see what this little bean has grown into?” she asks as she pulls the foot plank out, extending the bed. I squeeze Drew’s hand and he looks down at me reassuringly. “Okay, honey, lift your shirt and either unbutton or lower your pants.”
I feel Drew’s hand squeeze mine this time. I look up to him, holding his gaze with my own as I do what she’s instructed. I see his gaze slowly creep down my body to see what is exposed. “Just the belly,” I whisper. His gaze flashes back to mine with a bashful smile.
“Okay, let’s see what we have.” She lowers the device to my stomach and the galloping horse like sound instantly fills the room. “Heartbeat sounds great,” she says proudly.
I look to Drew as his eyes bulge at the sound, before looking to me in silent question. I nod to answer. I point to the black and white screen on the other side of the bed. “Look, Drew, there’s the legs and head,” I say, my voice thick with emotion.
“Were you two hoping for a boy or a girl?” the woman asks.
“Just healthy,” I manage around the lump in my throat.
“Well, I’ve made all my measurements and everything looks good. Doctor Patel will look at the report between now and your next visit, but I don’t see anything out of the ordinary. I guess you want me to tell you what you really came here to know, don’t you?” She smiles as she moves the wand around on my belly. She presses a little harder and then smiles. “Right there.” She uses the mouse on the screen to point to an area that looks like the vertex of an angle. “See right there?”
“I don’t see anything. What am I looking for?” I ask anxiously.
“Exactly, it’s a girl.” She smiles.
The tears break free before the actual crying starts. Drew gently cups my face between the palms of his hands, swipes the tears away with his thumbs, and kisses my forehead. “Congratulations,” he whispers against my skin.
Drew leads me to his car and helps me into the front seat as I shuffle through the black and white photos repeatedly. I’m mesmerized by the little limbs in several of her pictures.
>
“Hungry?” he asks, breaking my focus. I put the pictures in my purse.
“You’re talking to a pregnant woman,” I tease.
“Good, I like a woman who can eat.”
“Thank you, Drew.” I grab his hand and hold it.
He lifts our joined hands and kisses the back of mine softly. “It was my pleasure. I’m happy I was part of this day.” He lowers our hands, but makes no effort to disengage them.
“I need to text Emma.” I pull my phone from my purse; he makes no effort to release my hand and neither do I, so I text ‘IT’S A GIRL!’ one-handed.
‘Shopping this weekend!’
she immediately responds, bringing a smile to my face.
“So do you want to talk about him?” Drew asks.
I know without asking for clarification who he’s talking about. I really don’t want to, but for some reason I want Drew to know everything about me. I trust him.
“What do you want to know?” I ask.
He gives a subtle laugh. “I don’t know that I want to know anything, just trying to be a friend. Reeder’s filled me in a little. He’s some famous guy who has issues. That’s what I know. If you want to tell me more or need someone to talk to about it, I’m sitting right here.”
“Austin is a recovering addict. The last time I saw him he was barely holding onto the recovering part of that label. I don’t think he can handle being a dad. Or maybe I can’t handle having him in my life not knowing if he will be able to handle being a dad.” My voice wavers with emotion.
Drew nods. “Has he been to rehab?”
“Three times.”
Drew whistles through his teeth. “You’re both probably better off then,” he says matter-of-factly as he glances to my stomach.
“I hope so,” I say, unsure.
“You bought beer?” Reeder asks when I plop it on the counter in front of him.
“No, I found it in the parking lot,” I say sarcastically.
“Smart ass.” He puts it in the fridge with a chuckle.
“You better enjoy it too. You should have seen the judgmental looks I was getting from all the people in the grocery store,” I say, sitting on the couch and rubbing my belly.