Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Wise Up!

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Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Wise Up! Page 15

by Bathroom Readers' Institute


  There are more tigers (in zoos and as pets) in the United States than there are tigers in the wild.

  Costs in 1910

  A loaf of bread…5¢

  A postage stamp…2¢

  The average house…$4,000

  The average car…$500

  A Coca-Cola…5¢

  A movie ticket…7¢

  A dozen eggs…34¢

  A pound of flour…3¢

  A camera…$6.95

  A bathing suit…$1.75

  A teddy bear…75¢

  An apron…17¢

  A lace parasol…$1.29

  A pair of suspenders…18¢

  The average yearly wage was $963.

  A steak at the butcher shop went for 18¢ a pound.

  Relatively Speaking

  Alexander Graham Bell’s father-in-law was the first president of the National Geographic Society.

  Actor Kiefer Sutherland’s grandfather was the premier of Saskatchewan, Canada, for 17 years.

  George Dern, actress Laura Dern’s grandfather, was Secretary of War under Franklin D. Roosevelt.

  Actress Helena Bonham Carter’s great-grandfather was former British prime minister Herbert Asquith.

  James K. Polk was a great-grandnephew of John Knox, founder of Scottish Presbyterianism.

  Whitney Houston and Dionne Warwick are cousins. So were James Madison and Zachary Taylor.

  Tom Hanks is a descendant of Abraham Lincoln’s uncle.

  Moe Howard of Three Stooges fame married Harry Houdini’s cousin.

  Kaiser Wilhelm II, Czar Nicholas II, and King George V were all grandchildren of Queen Victoria.

  Charles Bonaparte, who was the grandnephew of Napoléon, founded the FBI.

  George W. Bush is related to Benedict Arnold, Marilyn Monroe, Winston Churchill, Princess Diana, Franklin Pierce, Abraham Lincoln, Theodore and Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Gerald Ford.

  President John Tyler was a granduncle of Harry S. Truman.

  American Idol 2002 runner-up Justin Guarini is a cousin of actor Samuel L. Jackson.

  Hugh Hefner and Bing Crosby both had ancestors on the Mayflower.

  American Institutions

  The U.S. Pledge of Allegiance was written in 1892 by Francis Bellamy…a socialist.

  The Liberty Bell was nearly sold for scrap metal in 1828.

  The American flag flies 24 hours a day at the White House (if the president is at home), at Valley Forge…and on the moon.

  From 1790 to 1800, Philadelphia was the capital of the United States.

  The United States actually declared its independence from Britain on July 2, 1776. But the Declaration of Independence wasn’t approved until July 4, 1776.

  The green ink used for U.S currency was invented by chemist Thomas Sterry Hunt, who worked in Canada.

  Drafts of the Declaration of Independence were written on hemp paper.

  Under the U.S. Constitution, there is no way to remove a Supreme Court justice for incompetence.

  Jacob Shallus, the calligrapher of the U.S. Constitution, was paid $30 for his work.

  Connecticut, Georgia, and Massachusetts waited until 1939 to ratify the Bill of Rights.

  Average cost to run for U.S. Congress in 2006: $1 million.

  The original Bill of Rights prevented congressmen from raising their own salaries. (Today, they vote on their raises.)

  During his administration, John Adams made it a crime to publish anything scandalous about the U.S. government.

  Members of Congress don’t need postage stamps for official mail—their signature counts as a stamp.

  Go Fish

  Fish have been swimming on our planet for more than 400 million years.

  Mackerel and tuna will die if they stop swimming.

  Deep-sea fish can explode when brought to the ocean’s surface because of the rapid decrease in outside pressure.

  Sea horses don’t have scales.

  The bioluminescent lantern fish produces enough light to read by (if you could read underwater).

  A bluefin tuna can weigh over 1,000 pounds.

  Electric eels can produce discharges of up to 650 volts.

  Flying fish can swim—and glide through the air—as fast as 40 mph.

  Only animal that can see both infrared and ultraviolet light: the goldfish.

  What fish can leave the water and walk on land? The spotted climbing perch, which uses its pectoral fins like legs.

  Forty percent of the world’s fish species live in freshwater.

  Catfish have 100,000 taste buds.

  A shoal is a group of fish that swims loosely grouped together. A school is a tight-knit, organized group that swims at the same speed.

  Fish yawn.

  Scientists estimate that up to 15,000 fish species have yet to be identified.

  World’s most venomous fish? The stonefish, which lives in the Pacific near Australia. It has 13 venomous spines on its back, and one sting can kill a human.

  A giant squid’s eye is the size of a dinner plate.

  The Information Age

  More than 10 million LP (long-playing) records are still sold every year.

  There are 250 million TVs in the United States—and 400 million in China.

  From 1897 until the 1950s, most records were made of a mix of shellac, slate, cotton, and wax.

  In 2007, the number of recorded CDs sold was about equal to the number of blank CDs sold.

  In the Soviet Union, people often made homemade records called “bones”—they were etched onto discarded medical X-rays.

  A standard DVD includes 7.5 miles of information.

  The 1889 Nickel-in-the-Slot, a coin-operated phonograph that was a precursor to the jukebox, made $1,000 in six months.

  Guglielmo Marconi, the inventor of radio, opened the first radio station in England in 1897.

  These days, most records are pressed onto recycled vinyl.

  Betamax VCRs were available from 1975 until 2002.

  The fax machine has been around since 1843…longer than the telephone.

  Radio waves from broadcasts of the 1930s have already traveled past 100,000 stars.

  Western Union invented singing telegrams to improve its “bad news” reputation.

  World’s fastest computer: IBM’s Roadrunner can perform 1,000 trillion calculations per second.

  Last movie released on laser disc: Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace.

  Grave Matters

  The title of Phil Spector’s “To Know Him Is to Love Him” was taken from his father’s tombstone.

  The earliest known will was written in 2550 BC.

  About 50 people a week visit the grave of Harry Potter, a British man who died in 1939 and is buried in Israel.

  King Tut’s third and inner coffin was made from 243 pounds of solid gold.

  The three wise men are said to be interred in a cathedral in Cologne, Germany.

  Hitler’s jawbone is reportedly kept “in a safe place” in Russia.

  For decades after Emperor Nero’s death, people in Rome claimed to have seen him.

  English poet Dante Rossetti put many of his unpublished poems in his wife’s coffin when she died in 1862. Seven years later, he retrieved them.

  American outlaw Clay Allison’s tombstone reads, “He never killed a man that did not need killing.”

  Marilyn Monroe, Natalie Wood, Walter Matthau, and Roy Orbison are all buried in the small Westwood Memorial Park in Los Angeles.

  In 1813, a British doctor turned the vertebrae of King Charles I into a saltshaker.

  * * *

  LAWYERS

  • Every 30 seconds, someone files a lawsuit in the United States.

  • More than 60 percent of the world’s lawyers live in the United States.

  Uncommon in Common

  Stephen Colbert, Vin Diesel, and Mike Myers all like to play Dungeons and Dragons.

  Little Richard and MC Hammer are both ordained ministers.

  Keanu Reeves, Johnny Depp,
and Russell Crowe play in bands.

  Walter Matthau, Goldie Hawn, and Sylvester Stallone all released albums…that bombed.

  Bob Dylan and Prince are both from Minnesota.

  Real people on Pez dispensers: Betsy Ross, Daniel Boone, and Paul Revere.

  The Sex Pistols covered songs by Frank Sinatra, Bill Haley, and the Monkees.

  As a session musician, Jimmy Page played with the Kinks, Joe Cocker, and Engelbert Humperdinck.

  B. B. King, Bill Haley, James Brown, and Ike Turner were former DJs.

  What do Elvis Presley and Liberace have in common? Both had a twin who died at birth.

  Frank Capra, Irving Berlin, Max Factor, and Bob Hope were immigrants processed through Ellis Island.

  Winston Churchill, Benito Mussolini, and Pope John Paul II all wrote movie scripts.

  Famous people from Arkansas: Maya Angelou, Johnny Cash, and Douglas MacArthur.

  Nick Cave, David Lee Roth, Henry Rollins, and Sting are all published authors.

  Laura Bush, J. Edgar Hoover, and Pope Pius XI were all librarians.

  Google, Apple, and Amazon started in home garages.

  Basic Feng Shui

  WHAT IS IT?

  Pronounced “fung shway,” it’s the ancient Chinese art of how things are placed in a home, business, or office in order to attract and circulate positive energy, or “chi.” Some unfavorable architectural details are impossible to change, so feng shui experts have come up with ways to “cure” them. Here are a few:

  THE ENTRY. The approach to your home should be unblocked and as clutter-free as possible. A curved path is okay, as long as it isn’t “too” curvy. A straight path can allow the chi to rush in. You’re looking for a nice, calm flow, outside and inside.

  THE FRONT DOOR. It should be easy to find. If it isn’t, make it obvious by adding an arbor, lining up plants along the walkway, or installing a sign that says “Welcome.”

  INSIDE THE FRONT DOOR. The space as you step inside the front door should be unblocked, and a blank wall facing the front door can stop the chi from entering. The cure: experts suggest putting up a mirror on that wall, even a small one.

  THE LIVING ROOM. Furniture should open toward you as you enter the room. The biggest piece, the sofa, is most important. Don’t let it block the entry into the room and try not to place it with its back facing the entry.

  THE BATHROOM. This is where the most dangerous fixture in feng shui resides: the toilet. Chi can go down the toilet, so keep the lid down and keep the door closed whether you’re in there or not.

  THE BEDROOM. Position the bed so that you have a full view of the room and the door. If windows and such make that impossible, put a mirror across from the bed and try to angle it so that you can see the reflection of the door. Whatever you do, don’t put a bed directly in line with the door. That’s what feng shui experts call the “coffin” position—if you were dead, your pallbearers could pick you up and take you (feet first) straight out the door. Nightstands on both sides of the bed will encourage balance in relationships.

  THE KITCHEN. The stove, a symbol of prosperity, is the most important fixture in the kitchen. Very few stoves face the doorway to the kitchen, so cures abound. Experts suggest putting a mirror (or something shiny) on the wall behind the stove. You can also just put a shiny kettle or pot on one of the burners. Not only will this enable the cook to be aware of anyone entering the room, the reflection will increase the number of the burners—from four to seven or eight—thereby increasing prospects for wealth.

  THE OFFICE. In the office—at home or at work—position the desk so that you’re facing the entrance when you sit, closer to the wall behind you than the doorway. It puts you “in command” and takes away any prospect of your being startled by someone entering the room without your knowledge.

  THE RELATIONSHIP AREA. The far right corner of your home is the relationship corner. If you want to have a harmonious relationship, put something pink there and decorate with things like hearts that symbolize love.

  FENG SHUI DON’TS

  • Dried flowers are a no-no because they’re dead. Plastic, silk, or real flowers are better. And when real flowers start to die, throw them out.

  • Knives on display in the kitchen can create conflict. Stow them in a drawer or in a wooden block.

  • Overhead beams—especially in a bedroom—are considered bad for chi flow and can upset a couple’s relationship. The higher the beams, the better. But either way, try to paint them a light color, cover them up, or have them removed.

  For the Birds

  The first bird mentioned in the Bible is a raven (Genesis 8:7). Second is a dove, in verse 8:8.

  The queen is the only person in Britain who is legally allowed to eat swan.

  Time needed to hard-boil an ostrich egg: two hours.

  The Baltimore Ravens have three mascots: Edgar, Allan, and Poe.

  The Pacific island of Nauru’s economy is based almost entirely on harvested bird droppings.

  Florence Nightingale had a pet owl named Athena.

  The shortest word ending in “ology” (meaning “the study of”) is oology—the study of eggs.

  The left drumstick of a chicken is more tender than the right one.

  During one insanity attack, King George III of England ended every sentence with “peacock.”

  At the 1900 Olympics, the archery competition used live pigeons as targets.

  If you actually ate “like a bird,” you’d eat about 28 pounds of food per day.

  The rock band the Eagles once sued the American Eagle Foundation for name infringement. (The band later dropped the suit.)

  There’s no such thing as a Cornish game hen—they’re just young chickens of two pounds or less.

  Rule at Yellowknife Golf Club in Canada: “No penalty assessed when ball carried off by raven.”

  In the 12th century, many Europeans believed that trees gave birth to birds.

  Behave in Public

  It’s against the law to run out of gas in Youngstown, Ohio.

  In Los Angeles, it’s against the law for infants to dance in public halls.

  If you’ve just eaten garlic in Gary, Indiana, you must wait at least four hours before you can attend a theater or ride on a public streetcar.

  In Rochester, Michigan, anyone swimming in public must have their suit inspected by a police officer.

  In Massachusetts, it is illegal for a mourner at a funeral to eat more than three sandwiches.

  In Elkhart, Indiana, it’s against the law for a barber to threaten to cut off a child’s ears.

  In Xenia, Ohio, it’s a crime to spit on a salad bar.

  It’s illegal to drive without a steering wheel in Decatur, Illinois.

  By law, all Washington, D.C., taxis must carry a broom and a shovel.

  In Louisiana, it is illegal to gargle in public.

  It’s against the law in Jefferson City, Missouri, to tie a boat to the railroad tracks.

  In Winchester, Massachusetts, it is illegal for a woman to dance on a tight-rope…unless she’s in a church.

  In Florida, you may not pass gas in a public place after 6:00 p.m.

  * * *

  “Speak softly and wear a loud shirt.”

  —Hawaiian proverb

  Mr. President

  8 PRESIDENTS FROM VIRGINIA

  1. George Washington

  2. Thomas Jefferson

  3. James Madison

  4. James Monroe

  5. William Henry Harrison

  6. John Tyler

  7. Zachary Taylor

  8. Woodrow Wilson

  6 PRESIDENTS WHO OWNED SLAVES

  1. George Washington

  2. Thomas Jefferson

  3. James Madison

  4. Andrew Jackson

  5. James Polk

  6. Zachary Taylor

  5 PRESIDENTS WHO WERE NEVER ELECTED

  1. John Tyler

  2. Millard Fillmore

  3. Andrew Johnson

>   4. Chester Arthur

  5. Gerald Ford

  3 PRESIDENTS WHO LOST THE POPULAR VOTE BUT WON ANYWAY

  1. Rutherford B. Hayes

  2. Benjamin Harrison

  3. George W. Bush

  2 MUSICAL PIECES PLAYED WHEN THE PRESIDENT ENTERS A ROOM

  1. “Ruffles and Flourishes”

  2. “Hail to the Chief”

  3 REQUIREMENTS TO BE ELECTED

  1. Must be at least 35 years old.

  2. Must be a natural-born citizen.

  3. Must have lived in the United States as a permanent resident for at least 14 years.

  6 JOBS BEFORE THEY WERE PRESIDENT

  1. Sheriff: Grover Cleveland

  2. Elevator operator: Lyndon B. Johnson

  3. Janitor: James Garfield

  4. Lifeguard: Ronald Reagan

  5. Male model: Gerald Ford

  6. Tavern worker: Martin Van Buren

  Military Miscellany

  When Saigon fell during the Vietnam War, the radio alert for Americans to evacuate was the song “White Christmas.”

  Pope John XXIII was a sergeant in the Italian army during World War I.

  The range of a medieval longbow was about 220 yards—more than two football fields.

  First people to wear T-shirts: sailors in the U.S. Navy.

  Annie Oakley taught soldiers marksmanship during World War I.

  Humphrey Bogart’s lisp was the result of a navy injury—a prisoner punched him in the mouth.

  Early guns took so long to load and fire that a bow and arrow was often more efficient.

  Jimmy Stewart was awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross and the Croix de Guerre in World War II.

  The groove around the rim of a bullet is called the cannelure.

  There’s a G.I. Joe action figure modeled after General Colin Powell.

  Hollywood Prop-erty

  Fifty gallons of fake blood were used during the filming of Scream. But combined, the Kill Bill movies used more than 450 gallons.

  The famous “horse’s head” in The Godfather was real—the producers got it from a dog-food company.

  The battered hat worn by Henry Fonda in On Golden Pond once belonged to Spencer Tracy.

 

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