by Ray, Shamara
“Malik has me talking crazy. He commented on how happy he keeps his women in the bedroom and then made a few jokes about Ellis and me. It made me start wondering.”
Giselle chimed in. “Wondering what?”
“If I’m missing out on something.”
Charlee and Giselle exchanged curious glances. “Ellis ain’t holding it down in the bedroom?” Charlee asked.
“I didn’t say that,” I snapped. “Our lovemaking is beautiful.”
“But are y’all fuckin’?”
“Charlee!” I shrieked.
Giselle chuckled. “Just answer the question, Melina.”
“Not really,” I said, reluctantly.
Charlee shook her head. “All that lovemaking is sweet, but every once in a while, your man needs to treat you like a whore behind closed doors. Now that’s passion.”
“I don’t want to be treated that way.”
“Hmph. That’s what you think,” Charlee said.
“Melina, refresh my memory. How many men have you been with?” Giselle asked.
“I’ve had my share.”
Charlee tilted her head. “Exactly how many would that be?”
“You both know I’ve only been with four men.”
“I know, but I like to hear you admit to that craziness. You’re almost thirty. That’s embarrassing.”
I had never been the type of woman to sleep around. I needed more of a connection, preferably a commitment. I’d always been proud of the fact that I could count the number of men I had been with on one hand.
Charlee doubled over with laughter. “It amazes me that you’ve only had four dicks in your life.”
I glared at her and shared the attitude with Giselle, daring her to laugh. “I’ve only had sex with four men. So the hell what?”
“We’re just teasing. You can’t blame us. Here you are, almost virginal, and then there’s us. I can’t even tell you how many men I’ve slept with. I admire that about you. Sex means something to you. But the point Charlee and I were trying to make is that you have limited experience. Be open to new things. Ellis is your man. You love him. If you act like a slut in the bedroom, he won’t think any less of you. If you want more passion, maybe you need to create it.”
“I didn’t realize I was friends with Dr. Ruth. If you two don’t mind, I’m done talking about Ellis.”
“Fine. We’ll talk about me and the sexy-ass man I had over here last night.”
Listening to Charlee divulge every intimate detail about her exploits left me feeling envious. I needed more from Ellis. However, our sex life was only part of the problem.
CHAPTER NINE
MALIK
The waitress placed the next round of drinks on the table behind us and waited to be paid. I pointed to Terrence. He walked up the steps and handed her a twenty. Lex was attempting to pick up a spare.
Terrence started talking just as Lex was releasing the ball. “Man, hurry up. The drinks are already paid for, so you can stop pretending to be concentrating on those pins.”
We howled as the ball veered toward the gutter.
Lex came off the lane and over to the seats. “I ought to pull my gun out and shoot your bowlegged ass right now for messing up my spare.”
That made us laugh even harder. Lex was a New York City police officer a.k.a. Officer Evans. Most people were intimidated by his presence alone; the sight of him with a gun made it worse. Big. Black. Brash. Bald. The only way to describe him. Lex came over and snatched his beer from the table.
Terrence slapped him on the back. “Let me show you how it’s done.” He picked up his ball and then got into his stance. He extended his arm in one smooth line, brought it forward and let it roll off his fingertips. The bowling ball traveled fast and clean down the middle of the lane. Strike. “I may be tall and bowlegged, but I got skills.”
My brother, Amir, and I gave Terrence high-fives. Lex feigned like he was going for his gun. Amir stood between Terrence and Lex, laughing. “C’mon now, fellas. Let’s keep the peace. I got the next round.”
“Keep the drinks coming,” I said. “I’m enjoying the spoils of victory.”
“I have to admit, I was certain that was one bet you would never win,” Terrence said.
“That’s what you get for doubting a true playa. And don’t think I forgot each of you owes me a c-note.”
Amir nodded his head. “I gotta c-note for ya. In fact, I can give you all the c-notes you want tonight at the club.”
That cracked us all up. Amir played the saxophone in a jazz band. After bowling, we were all heading down to the village to catch his late-night set at the Blue Note. I didn’t get to hear him play as often as I would’ve liked, but I showed support when I could. Amir was a year older than me. Music had been his life for as long as I could remember. My father had hoped it was a phase. Amir dropping out of college told him otherwise. He’d become accustomed to our father riding him about getting a real job.
My mother never complained and was always there to bail her firstborn out of financial trouble. Her purse remained open for her songbird. My mother understood the plight of a musician. She was the lead singer in a group called The Pageants when she met my father. She joked that if she hadn’t met my father and fallen in love, she’d probably be rich, living the high life somewhere.
It was my turn to bowl. I managed to knock down two pins and then got raked over the coals for my poor showing.
“Man, you better leave Kai alone. She’s throwing your game off,” Terrence said.
“I’m worn out. Three nights this week, and she was trying to get me over there tonight.”
“That must be some good stuff. If you can’t handle it, Lex Evans will pick up your slack.”
“Thanks, Officer, but I don’t need any backup on this one,” I said, laughing.
Out of my crew, we were all living the single life, with the exception of Terrence. He recently got engaged to a wonderful woman whom he had met about a year ago. I never thought I would see the day that Terrence Forrester would settle down—he was infamous for his women-juggling skills. I barely recognized him, devoted and faithful. Next Saturday, he was having his engagement party at his sister Jade’s restaurant. He’d told me to invite Kai. My response: hell no! An engagement party is the last place to invite a single woman that you are not serious about.
“Let’s bowl one more game, and then I need to get down to the club,” Amir said.
Lex shook his head. “Why don’t we skip the next game and get a head start on meeting some ladies? I’m tired of looking at your ugly mugs.”
“It sounds like you’re tired of losing and want to quit before you embarrass yourself more than you already have.”
“I have the highest average out of all of you.”
“Yeah, but tonight you’re getting your ass kicked.”
“Don’t get used to it. Every man is entitled to a bad night.”
“I hope you have better luck with the ladies.”
“You just concentrate on blowing that horn, Little Boy Blue.”
• • •
Our table was directly in front of the stage. I had to give Amir credit, he was bad on the sax. He seduced the audience with a mellow groove, had us all rocking in our seats. The room was primarily filled with couples. I found myself thinking of Kai a few times, reminiscing on the wild week we had together. I’d call her after the show to see if she would be game for some late-night company.
Lex capitalized on the single women sprinkled throughout the audience and left us to go sit with a chick and her double D’s. Terrence was nursing his drink with a far-off expression that said he was ready to go home to his fiancée, instead of hanging out with a group of single knuckleheads.
Amir’s female fans were tempting, sexy, hungry, and eyeing him like he was a succulent steak. They were going crazy over him—it must have been his funky style. Where we both had curly hair, he wore his in a bushy Afro and had a close-cut goatee compared to my clean-shaven fa
ce. A small hoop decorated one of his nostrils. We were night and day.
I stuck around for a few minutes after his set to peep how he worked his groupies. It made me proud to see my older brother in his element. Music and women. Why would he ever opt for a different career?
It was two in the morning when we stepped out of the club. I collected my three hundred dollars from my boys and did a little gloating. We made plans to get to the engagement party next Saturday, and then I hopped a cab uptown to Kai’s apartment.
CHAPTER TEN
MELINA
I arrived at the office at seven with a full cup of coffee and a long day ahead of me. I was immersed in my work when my assistant, Nadia, tapped on my door an hour later. She entered, carrying a pile of files and a notepad perched at the top.
Nadia set the files in the tray on my desk. “You’re in early.”
“I have to complete the Omega Toys quarterly audit.”
“I put on a pot of hazelnut coffee. Do you want a refill?”
“No, not right now.”
Nadia sat in the chair on the other side of my desk with her pen poised above her notepad.
“Can you print last year’s Form 10-K for Omega? I need to reference the executive compensation figures. And hold my calls.”
“What if Ellis calls? You know he doesn’t like it when I don’t put him through.”
“I’m not taking any calls. That includes Ellis.”
“I hear you but—”
“No calls, Nadia.”
“All right. I’ll get you those forms.”
When Nadia left the office, I shook my head. How did Ellis have my assistant more worried about his reaction than about doing what I asked her to do? I didn’t want to probe Nadia about his behavior, but I would certainly inquire with Ellis about his conduct when calling my office. I could only imagine him shoving his sense of entitlement down Nadia’s throat.
I managed to get through most of the morning uninterrupted. My only diversions were a few questions from Dave and Heather, two of the accountants on my staff. In total I had a staff of ten, half of them being accountants. Nadia was my assistant and we had two others that divided their time between accountants. A couple of interns were responsible for miscellaneous office duties.
My purse hummed with the vibration of my cell phone. I reached in the bag and checked the number of the incoming call. Ellis. Nadia wouldn’t put him through, so he dialed my cell. Typical. I silenced the phone and laid it on my desk. A few minutes later, he called again. I dropped the phone back in my bag. I gathered up my files for Omega Toys and tossed them into my briefcase. I headed down the hallway to the reception area and retrieved my trench from the coat rack.
“Nadia, I’ll be back in a few hours. If you need me, call my cell.”
I was meeting with Martin Sewell at noon and had to be back in the office no later than three for my next meeting. Martin was a talker and tended to discuss his family and his travels more than our business matters. It would be a hustle, but if I could keep Martin on track, I’d be back on time with minutes to spare.
My bag vibrated as I walked out of the door. I answered the phone, explained to Ellis that I was in the midst of an extremely chaotic day, and promised to call as soon as I found a free minute. I hurried to my car and off to Midtown Manhattan to meet with Martin.
• • •
I was in the kitchen preparing dinner when I heard Malik’s key turning in the lock. I added a pinch of salt to the shrimp.
“Hey, roomie.” Malik stood in the doorway, pulling off his tie. “Something is smelling good up in here.”
“I’m making garlic shrimp and rice.”
“Damn and a brother’s starving, too.”
“There’s more than enough for both of us. It’ll be ready in a few minutes.”
“Okay. I’m going to take a quick shower.”
I made a tossed salad and then set the table for two. I usually prepared enough food for Malik when I cooked, but our schedules were so different, we seldom ate together. After my day of back-to-back meetings, I was in the mood to throw down in the kitchen. I needed some comfort food. I grabbed my potholder and pulled a pan of hot cornbread from the oven. I slathered the golden brown top with butter and then cut it into hefty squares.
Malik wandered back into the kitchen barefoot, wearing an old T-shirt and a pair of sweats, his short, curly hair still damp. He plated the salad and went to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of Merlot. “Do you want wine with your dinner?”
I nodded. Malik reached into the cabinet and retrieved glasses. I scooped steaming spoonfuls of yellow rice into two bowls and ladled on generous portions of shrimp and garlic sauce. I carried the bowls to the table while Malik poured the wine.
We both sat at the table, said silent blessings and commenced to eating.
“I’m glad you cooked. I was going to run out for Chinese food.”
“How much of that can you eat? Don’t any of your women cook for you?”
“We don’t have those kinds of arrangements, Mel.”
“Since when is a meal an arrangement?”
“It’s simple. The women I see know that I’m not down for anything serious. The more we keep it casual, the better. Once a woman starts preparing meals and doing girlfriend-type things for you, then she starts expecting you to be her man.”
“But you miss out on so many things. What about spending time with someone special? Don’t you get lonely sometimes? Not being able to share dinner with someone? Not cuddling up to someone at night?”
“That’s what I have you for.”
I rolled my eyes. “Will you be serious?”
Malik laughed. “Yeah, sometimes I want those things, but most times I don’t. I’m not ready for a commitment. There are too many things I want to do first.”
“Like what, more women?”
“Funny. No. Like start my own business.”
I stopped eating. “I didn’t know you wanted to do that.”
“No one does, except my dad, and now you. I’ve been working on my business plan and scouting out locations for my office.”
“I had no idea.”
“There’s a lot more to me than you think, Mel.”
Malik explained how he felt stifled at his current job. Told me how, over the years, he had proven himself an irreplaceable asset and yet they had failed to recognize it until now. He was finally assigned a major client and was working on the project with a coworker named Kai.
“What was that I just saw?” I asked.
Malik looked over his shoulder. “What?”
“I saw something in your eyes when you mentioned Kai.”
“You better slow down on the wine.”
“I know what I saw, Malik. There was something in your eyes that was hardly professional when you were talking about her.”
“Damn. You don’t miss a thing.”
“No, I don’t.” I laughed. “So you obviously like this girl.”
“We’ve spent some time together.”
“Listen to you, trying to be all evasive. If you’re working on an account together, I know you spent time together. Have you asked her out yet?”
“We’ve been out.”
“Okay . . .and?”
“Mel, you and I live two drastically different lifestyles. You do the relationship thing and I don’t.”
“What does a relationship have to do with taking someone out on a date?”
“You expect me to engage in some olden-day courtship, but for me, life isn’t like that. Kai and I went out, we’ve already fucked, and since then we’ve fucked some more.”
My mouth fell open. I wasn’t prepared for that crass declaration. “You mean to tell me within a week, you already slept with her?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
“Your coworker?”
“Yup.”
“The woman you have to work with on an important project?”
“Yes, Mel.”
“Now what?”
“Now nothing. We continue to work together and when we’re in the mood, we play together.”
I watched Malik’s face, observed the glint in his eye and the subtle smile that graced his lips. He could play it cool if he wanted, but something was brewing. I’d let it go for now. “I’m sure you know what you’re doing, but be careful. You know what they say about the dangers of dating coworkers.”
“For the record, I wouldn’t call what we’re doing dating. And as a black man, there are a hell of a lot more dangers for me to be concerned about.”
“I can’t argue with that.”
Malik refilled my glass while I fixed him another serving of shrimp and rice. I drank my Merlot, pondering our conversation. Malik was thirty-two years old. He wasn’t interested in a committed relationship because of his business aspirations. When would he be ready? Thirty-five? Forty? Fifty? How many men shared the same perception? What about the women who wanted more?
My eyes were transfixed on a spot on the table. Malik waved his hand in front of my face. I refocused on him. “Do you ever plan on getting married?”
“If I meet the right woman. I’m not anti-marriage; right now, I’m just pro-career.”
“Can’t you have both?”
Malik shook his head. “Women get accustomed to spending a certain amount of time with their man. I have more time to spend with someone now because I’m working for Newport and Donner. Once I start my own agency, my time is going to be severely limited—which equates to instant trouble. The same woman that was living in bliss and completely happy with the relationship will be complaining that her man is never around. Whining that he doesn’t have time for her. When all along this man is out there busting his hump trying to do something positive, to make a better life for himself. I’m not going to put myself in that predicament.”
When I met Ellis, he was already well-established, his lifestyle set. Admittedly, I accepted his schedule, but the desire to have more time together was still there. Malik was fooling himself. Perhaps the woman wouldn’t speak up or complain because she was aware of his lack of accessibility from the beginning, but there are bound to be repercussions when a woman is unfulfilled on any level.