"Down to San Diego. It's just for a few days."
I smiled even though I couldn’t help but be disappointed. How ridiculous of me to care where he went and for how long.
"I heard San Diego's nice," I said. "Have fun!"
"I will, and I'll give you a call when I get back."
I swiped my hand in the air as if it were no consequence to me if he called or not. What a lie.
He didn't ask me to walk him out. He thanked me for letting him come over and said he had a great time. I thanked him for the company and told him to hug his mother for the delicious potpie. Lexi chimed in saying she couldn't wait to taste it. I stood to walk him to the door and he gave me a quick, friendly hug before waving one last time at Lexi.
And just like that, he was gone.
Chapter 15
Mrs. Williams called that evening after Zack left. She was a creature of routine, and she'd gotten into the habit of calling me to check in every other Sunday night.
She knew I'd been sick since taking antibiotics, but I didn't tell her how severe it was because I didn't want to make her worry. I tried not to tell her at all, but she kept asking questions about Peter and I just couldn't lie.
I told her I'd finally put a name to the symptoms I was experiencing—that it was called floxing and was basically like I'd been poisoned. I had told Lexi all about it before Ms. Williams ever called, but she sat right there and listened to me talk about it again, shaking her head at what a shame it was.
"I should have known how sick I was that first day I started taking it," I said. "I shouldn't have listened to the doctors when they said it was just a tummy ache and I should stay on it."
"How were you to know, sweetheart?" Rita said. "Doctors try their best, and we just do what they tell us."
"I know, but I just can't help but regret it. I should have known. I should have stood up for myself."
"You had no way of knowing this would happen, and neither did they. Just take it as a lesson."
I told her how it could have been a lot worse, using the example of the girl who lost the use of her legs. She was stunned and said how in all her years she'd never heard of such a thing.
She asked if I'd had the chance to draw anything since I'd been feeling a little better. I told her I hadn't just yet, but in the back of my mind I was thinking about Zack and how he'd given me some homework. I thought I'd probably do a little sketching while he was in San Diego just to see if I could come up with anything.
I realized as I wrapped up the conversation with Mrs. Williams that all of my thoughts were leading back to Zack. This was getting into dangerous waters. I got off the phone, thinking I needed to devise a plan to get him off my mind.
"That was really sweet of Zack to look into what's been going on with you," Lexi said as soon as I hung up the phone, immediately foiling my plans to forget about him. "And that potpie was crazy-good," she added. "I think he's a keeper."
"Obviously he's a keeper, Lex," I said in a frustrated tone. "I'm just not the one to keep him."
She held up her hands in surrender looking fearful that I might explode. "What's your deal?" she asked.
"I'm just trying to forget about how perfect he is, so I don't need you to bring it up right now."
"Why do you need to forget about it?"
"Because it just makes me want him, and that's never gonna happen. It just sets me up for disappointment."
She giggled, which made me narrow my eyes at her. "What are you laughing at?"
"You!"
"Why?"
"Because he's obviously in loooove with you and you're being all dramatic like you don't stand a chance with him."
"You're out of your mind," I said.
She laughed again. "You're blind if you don't see it."
I smiled sarcastically and shook my head. "He's a saint, Lex, and I'm one of his charity cases."
She stood up to head to the bedroom. "You're in a bad mood," she said from over her shoulder.
"I'm gonna take a shower and maybe when I get out we can have a civilized conversation about you and your new boyfriend."
I threw a couch pillow at her, but she just ignored it. I tried my best to be upset, but the word boyfriend as a reference to Zack Martin made an uncontrollable smile spread across my face, even if only for a second before I remembered it wasn't true.
***
I started a drawing the next day. I had to work around being sick, but I found a few hours when the grip was loose enough for me to sit down and focus with a pencil and paper.
I was glad I made the effort. I found it difficult to come up with something I thought was good enough to represent Zack, but I ended up working on a bread inspired piece. Lexi had brought home some dinner rolls from work and they were sitting in a clear plastic bag on the bar when I sat down with my sketchpad.
My design was a table full of various breads and cakes in all shapes colors and sizes. It obviously wouldn't do for Zack's apartment, but I really loved how it came out, and imagined that it would translate beautifully into glass.
Part of me hoped I'd hear from Zack that evening, but it didn't happen. I tried to tell myself that he was busy in San Diego, but disappointment still found a way to nag at me.
I had a decent night's sleep, which helped some. I woke up feeling blessed and thankful not to have been electrocuted all night.
The next day was Tuesday and Lexi had to work a double. Usually, I was too sick to care about being bored—boredom never even crossed my mind. Today, however, I woke up feeling rested and the thought of sitting around the house watching TV all day didn't appeal to me. I thought I'd do some more drawing and maybe even get out of the house to take a walk.
"I might come by Miller's during lunch to say hi to everybody," I said, before Lexi left that morning.
She looked at me like she thought I was kidding. "Seriously?"
"Yeah, I had a good night last night, and I was just sitting here dreading being bored, so I thought maybe I'd come by."
Lexi crossed the room and put her arms around my neck. She squeezed me tightly. "You're getting better, I knew it," she said. "See? Everything's gonna be fine."
"Of course it'll be fine," I said.
"So you're not trying to take us back to Washington anymore?" she asked.
I hadn't realized she was so worried about that. I also hadn't realized that I no longer assumed we'd be going back to Washington. "I guess I was sort of thinking we might try to make it here… as long as I keep recovering."
She squealed and hugged me again. "That's the best news ever!"
She hugged me so tightly that I groaned. "Lex, you're choking me."
She let go. "I'm sorry but you have no idea how happy I am. I knew Zack would make you change your mind."
"Zack has nothing to do with it," I said.
She squinted at me. "Yeah right."
Lexi left for work, and not five minutes later I got a text from Zack. The smile on my face when I realized who it was made me think Lexi might have been on to something about why I suddenly wanted to stay. My stomach instantly turned into a thousand knots as I read the words.
Zack: "Thinking about you. Hope you're feeling well and hope you're making time to draw. I'll be back tomorrow night. Wanna hang out Thursday?"
I read the text twice, paced across the apartment a few times, and read it again. I didn't know if I should respond right away or not, but it was impossible to hold out, so I started typing.
Me: "I was thinking about you too. Hope you're having fun in San Diego. I'm back to drawing, and it feels great. Thanks for the encouragement. Thursday sounds good."
I read it before I sent it and decided to omit the first sentence that said I was thinking about him. It just seemed like too much. I deleted it and pressed send. I heard back from him right away.
Zack: "How's 10am?"
Me: "Perfect."
Zack: "I'll come to your place. If you're feeling up to it, we'll go do something, if not, we'll watch
Price is Right."
I closed my eyes and held the phone to my chest before I responded. Why did he have to be so perfect?
Me: "Can't wait."
Zack: "Me neither. BTW, I have something for you."
Me: "You shouldn't."
Zack: "Already did."
Me: "Is it a new central nervous system?"
Zack: "Haha. I'm not that rich."
Me: "No need to bring anything but yourself and your Price is Right skills."
Zack: "See you Thursday at 10."
Me: "Looking forward to it."
Zack didn’t respond to that. I didn't expect him to. I reread the string of texts before I put down the phone, feeling excited about the possibility of seeing him in two days.
I made another drawing that day. That one wasn't for Zack's apartment either—at least I assumed it wasn't something he'd be interested in. It was for me. It was a landscape design that had a violent looking storm on one side, which morphed into a calm, serene sky on the other. One side would be dark purples, blues, and greys, and it would fade into soft pastels. It was sort of representative of the storm that had been brewing in my own body for so long. The calm side was obviously my goal, and I hoped and prayed that was just around the corner.
That sketch took a good portion of the day, but I made time for a walk. I went down to Miller's for a few minutes. Lexi wanted me to go to the kitchen to see everybody, but I didn't have on makeup. I told her I needed to pace myself anyway and that I'd try to come by again before too long.
It seemed like forever since I'd set foot into that place, and I was glad I made the effort. I saw a few of the staff while I was there. They all expressed their concern for my health and said they would be glad to have me back at work. I could tell they all loved Lexi, and I felt fortunate to have them looking out for her.
Wednesday was just as productive as Monday and Tuesday had been. I did another drawing. This one was an animal scene. The centerpiece was an elephant, and the other animals were positioned around him looking out as if they were a big animal family that was posing for a picture. This one, like the other two, likely wouldn't be for Zack, but hey, at least I was drawing.
That inspired me to call Peter. I told him I'd been able to think and function a bit better and that I'd like to come in for a few hours next week if he didn't mind. He said he'd be glad to have me. He asked how I had been and seemed genuinely concerned, but I could tell he had no concept of how bad it had been. No one did—not even Lexi or Zack who seemed to be my number one advocates.
I went to bed that night anxious to see Zack in the morning. The past few days had been good, so I was hopeful that I would be headed somewhere with Zack instead of being stuck on the couch watching The Price is Right.
I was sadly mistaken.
It was the worst night I had in a while. I had taken a multi-vitamin with some fiber the day before in hopes of it helping me use the restroom. Boy was that a mistake. Apparently, I still could not take anything without it sending my body into shock. It's like my system had too much to deal with already with all the toxins, and anything else I added to the mix made me miserably sick.
I woke up about eight times that night feeling like I was sitting in an electric chair. I stared at Lexi who was sleeping soundly and just cried my eyes out, wondering how long this agony could possibly last. It seemed like it would never end.
Lexi had breakfast plans the next morning, so she was gone when Zack arrived. I was so sick that I actually forgot he was coming until he showed up at the door.
Chapter 16
"What in the world?" he said seeing the state in which I answered the door.
"I'm sick," I said.
"What happened?" He took me into his arms and we stood there in the doorway.
I snuggled into his chest, feeling only the slightest bit of comfort from the pain. "I took a vitamin yesterday," I said. "I think maybe that's what did it. Did those people on the website say anything about not being able to take anything?"
"Yes," he said. He rubbed my back in an effort to comfort me.
"Did they say their ears and jaw really hurt?"
"Yes."
"Did they say their arm went numb and their brain didn't work right?"
"Yes they did, Laney. They said all that."
I let out a few miserable sobs. "I hate being sick."
"I know you do," he said, continuing to run his hand up and down my back.
"Why's it not getting better?" I asked weakly.
"It is getting better," he said. "It's normal to have waves like this. They call them flares. You can have flares for weeks or even months—sometimes longer."
I sobbed again. "It's so scary."
He held me tenderly. "I know it is, but it's gonna get better. It already has. Remember? Just the other day you said you might try to draw something. A month ago, you wouldn't even consider drawing."
"I did draw," I said. "I drew three windows."
He pulled back a little and stared down at me. "You did? Can I see them?"
I nodded and he held me close again. "I'll show you sometime," I said.
"I can't believe you did three drawings. That's awesome."
"Yeah, but now I'm feeling bad again. It's not supposed to be going backwards. It's so frustrating."
"I just told you flares like this were normal. And like you said, that vitamin probably didn't help."
I sighed and wiped at my tears, trying to compose myself. "I can't believe antibiotics could do this. It's been two and a half months and I seriously almost woke Lexi up and made her bring me to the hospital again last night."
Zack continued to run a comforting hand up and down my back. "I know it's scary and it sucks, but you have to remember you're not alone. Other people have had this exact thing, and they got through it." He paused. "And you need to remember that God knows everything. He knows exactly what you're feeling and exactly how much you can handle."
I remembered praying desperately only hours before—begging God to take away my pain or go ahead and take me to heaven. "Sometimes I think He overestimates what I can handle." I said with a half smile. "I have to think you're right and He's got some sort of plans for me because I've literally begged Him to take me out of my misery."
"He hears you, Laney. It's just a little glitch. I know it doesn't seem like that right now, but you'll get past it. Everything I've read says time is your best friend."
"Thank you," I said. "Thank you for everything." I wiped my eyes as I looked up at him. "I'm really sorry you have to see me all torn up like this. I should have told you to come some other time, but I forgot you were coming over."
He pulled back slightly and put a fist to his chest in a stabbing motion. "Ouch," he said, smiling.
I smiled weakly at him. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't have forgotten if my brain was working right."
Zack held my head to his chest. "I know, baby. And I know it hurts. It's gonna get better."
He ran his hand over my head a few times. The waves of sickness were so intense that I barely noticed him calling me baby. I say barely, but I did notice it.
"Do you mind if I stay with you a little while?" he asked.
I nodded. "I want you to."
We went to the couch. He sat on one end and I stretched out with my head on his leg. We watched The Price is Right together just like we mentioned and then we sat there and watched another hour of daytime television after that. It was a rough morning for me, so I didn't do much watching. I just sort of stared blankly at the television, praying for it to be over. Zack kept a hand on my head or shoulder at all times, which comforted me greatly, and by the time the two shows were over, the grip had loosened somewhat. I wasn't feeling human, but I also wasn't feeling like I was about to die, so I knew there was hope that the worst part of the day was over.
"It's a little better," I said, sitting up. I regarded him with a sincere expression. "Thank you for being here with me. I'm sorry I was so out of it."
He smi
led, and again I was mesmerized. I wondered what in the world someone like him was doing here.
"I have some news for you," he said, drawing me out of my trance. "Do you think you're up for hearing some news?"
I gave him a quizzical glance. "What sort of news?"
He rubbed his jaw as if deciding whether or not to tell me something. "My uncle Ross has a good friend who's a detective with the Sacramento PD. I asked him to snoop around a little, and anyway, there were no stab wound fatalities that matched the time and location you told me about."
I just stared at him not knowing what to say.
"I don't know if it makes you happy or not, but you didn't kill anybody, Laney. I just thought you should know."
I still didn't know what to say. A piece of me wished that guy wasn't still walking around, but an undeniable weight lifted from my shoulders as a result of that news.
"Did you tell your uncle I did that?"
He gave me a sweet half-smile. "Don’t worry about that. He did it as a favor—no questions asked."
"Did you have to tell anyone, even your parents?"
"Not a soul," he said.
I closed my eyes, loving the feeling of having that fear off my chest. "Thank you," I said slumping forward.
He ran his hand along my back. "You're welcome," he said. I sat there for a minute thinking of everything.
"I have something else for you."
I faced him with a curious expression. He leaned over so he could fish into his pocket, and came out with a Benchmade knife just exactly like the one I left behind.
"I had to call Nathan Callahan to make sure I had the right one," he said. "They make different sizes in the Summit Lake, you know."
I smiled as I took the knife out of his hand. "Did you really call Mr. Callihan?"
"I sure did. We had a nice long conversation. He thinks the world of you."
I smiled. "Are you kidding me right now?"
"Of course not. How else would I know which knife you needed?"
"I seriously can't believe how wonderful you are," I said, staring at him in wonder. "Why in the world are you being so nice? Are you like this to everyone? You must be exhausted."
Something of a Storm (All in Good Time Book 1) Page 11