by Anna Jacobs
‘But she’s mentally unstable.’
‘It takes one to recognize one.’
The phone clicked off. Sebastian stared at it in outrage. He couldn’t seem to think straight. He didn’t know what to do.
He wished he was a drinking man, but he never had been able to take more than a glass or two.
Where could Dorothy have gone? He had to get her back. Had to. He couldn’t manage without her.
Brody went into the kitchen and Miranda followed.
‘Thank you for including me when you were talking to Ned. You could have easily used that to try to get rid of me.’
‘I’d never use a child to get back at someone, and you can’t have known me very well if you thought I would.’
‘I came to the conclusion a long time ago that I didn’t know you as well as I thought.’
‘What did my father tell you?’
‘As if you don’t know.’
‘I don’t.’
He looked at her, frowning, clearly not believing her.
Just then her mobile phone rang. She went across to her handbag and fumbled for it, afraid it might be bad news.
‘Miranda?’
‘Regina. Is everything all right?’
‘No, it isn’t.’
Her sister started sobbing. ‘It’s Nikki. She’s lost the baby. I thought I didn’t care and I do, Miranda, I do!’
‘I can’t come to you, but you can come to me, if you like. I’m at Katie’s, my daughter’s house. Her husband’s been injured and I’m looking after my grandson while she’s at the hospital, so I can’t leave here.’
Her voice was dull. ‘You have a grandson. Mine just died.’
‘I’m so sorry, more sorry than words can say.’
‘Would you mind if I came to see you? I feel . . . lost.’
‘Not at all.’ She gave Regina the address and shut down the phone, staring at it for a moment before looking at Brody. ‘Did you hear that?’
‘Yes. Who’s Nikki?’
‘Regina’s daughter. My niece. She’s eighteen and she was pregnant. She wasn’t well and had to go into hospital.’
‘History repeating itself, like aunt, like niece.’
She couldn’t believe he’d say anything so cruel but didn’t say anything, just turned her back on him and busied herself putting the kettle on. Regina might want a hot drink.
‘I’m sorry.’
She kept her back to him.
He moved to stand nearer to her. ‘That was uncalled for. I really am sorry, Miranda.’
She turned, finding herself too close to him, especially with these clothes which seemed to offer no protection, no barrier, so flimsy were they.
He laid his right hand on her shoulder for a moment, then stepped back. ‘I could do with a cup of coffee, if you’re making some. I can’t see us getting any sleep now. When she comes, I’ll leave you and your sister to talk.’
She inclined her head. She didn’t want to talk to him, didn’t want to lay herself open to more sniping and insults. He might have apologized but he clearly had a very low opinion of her. Only . . . she’d always wondered what they’d told him. She’d ask him later. Regina wouldn’t be long, so there was no time to talk now.
Regina found the house easily. It was the only one in the street with lights on in several rooms. She got out of the car and hurried to the front door. Miranda opened it before she got there, holding her arms out. Regina walked into them and the two sisters hugged one another tightly.
Then Regina looked down the hall and saw a man standing watching them, a man who looked vaguely familiar. ‘I didn’t realize you weren’t alone. I’m sorry if I’ve interrupted something.’
‘You’ve not interrupted anything worth continuing,’ Miranda said with a sharp edge to her voice. ‘This is Brody, Katie’s birth father.’
Regina gaped at him then looked back at Miranda. ‘You two got together again?’
‘Hardly, given the opinion he has of me. No. We have an armed truce while we look after our grandson. Shall you and I go into the sitting room?’
‘I’ll make you both some coffee if you like,’ Brody offered.
‘No, thank you.’ Miranda walked past him into the front room.
Regina hesitated. ‘I’d kill for a cup of coffee. Black. No sugar.’
‘Miranda?’ His voice was hesitant.
‘I said no. If I want some, I’ll get it myself. I don’t intend to trouble you more than I have to.’
He vanished into the kitchen and Regina let out her breath in a faint whistle. Something was very wrong between these two. She followed her sister into the room and sat down on the couch. ‘I’m sorry I interrupted you.’
‘You only interrupted him insulting me.’
‘Why would he do that?’
‘If I knew exactly what Father and Sebastian had told him, I might be able to answer that question. But I don’t know. And I’m not going to even try to find out. If Brody’s mind is so closed, if he’s so cynical, he can think what he likes about me.’
‘My mind is not closed!’ Brody came into the room, scowled at Miranda and dumped two cups of coffee on the low table. ‘Drink it or not, as you please.’ He walked out again.
Regina whistled softly again as she picked up the cup of coffee. ‘You should tell him what happened from your point of view and find out what they said to him.’
‘He’d not believe me if I did. And why bother? It’s all in the past now, and I’m building a new life.’
‘If you’re going to continue seeing your daughter it’d be a lot easier—’ She broke off and held up one hand. ‘All right. I’ll mind my own business.’
‘Tell me about Nikki.’
Dorothy looked out of the plane window as it came in to land in Sydney. She could see the huge old bridge and the opera house quite clearly. It had been a while since she’d been here. Or anywhere. Sebastian didn’t like going overseas, didn’t even like touring in his own state, nor did he like her going away from him on her own.
Why had she put up with it for so long? Why had she let him even start treating her like that?
As she came out of the airport, she saw her older son waiting for her. John hurried towards her, his eyes searching her face anxiously as if she’d look different.
‘Are you all right, Mother?’
‘Yes.’
‘Why didn’t you tell us?’
‘I was ashamed and embarrassed. That sort of thing doesn’t happen to people like us, does it, just to uneducated people who don’t know any better?’
‘Gerry and I thought it had stopped.’
She was startled. ‘You knew?’
‘Of course we did. We could hardly help overhearing sometimes. But when I taxed him with it, he said he’d been stressed, but was getting help. I believed him. Well, I used to be as narrowly focused on my work as he was. It wasn’t till I met Bron that I started learning how to relax, how to enjoy other things besides getting on, how to care for other people.’
‘Does she mind me coming to stay?’
‘No, of course not. I showed her the photo. She was as shocked about it as I was and she didn’t hesitate.’
‘I won’t stay for long. I’ve been putting money aside for a while, and I still have skills that will earn me a living, even at my age. Your father doesn’t know that I’ve been selling articles to journals for years, using a PO Box and keeping the money in a separate bank account.’
‘You’re being very brave.’
‘No. I’m not. I’m scared witless. But if your Aunt Miranda can break free of Sebastian, after all he and Father did to her, then so can I.’
He frowned. ‘What exactly did they do to her, apart from use her as a drudge?’
‘I’ll tell you about that another time. Let’s go to your house. And if he calls . . . ?’
‘I shan’t tell him you’re here. Actually, I rang him after I spoke to you and told him I want nothing to do with him or Aunt Minnie’s money.’
/>
She smiled. ‘Good for you. She wants to be called Miranda now – and she’s changed so much it suits her. Thank you for having me.’ She’d been touched by how quickly John had asked her to come and stay with him and his wife, how he’d offered to help her financially to set up a new life for herself. Tomorrow her lawyer would be delivering her ultimatum to Sebastian.
And Sally Patel would be reading the letter Dorothy had sent her.
She wasn’t just going to set her own life in order. She’d stood by for years and let them treat poor Miranda badly. She felt ashamed of that now. But maybe she could make up for it a little.
Twenty
Miranda found Ned still sleeping peacefully when it was time to get him up for school. She heard a sound behind her and turned to see Brody standing in the doorway, looking at their grandson with a fond expression on his face.
She put one finger to her lips and moved towards him, indicating that they should move out of the room. ‘I don’t think we should wake him. He didn’t get a lot of sleep.’
‘I agree.’ He hesitated. ‘I really can look after him on my own if you have something to do.’
‘I don’t have anything I need to do for myself, but we ought to look at the food situation here and see if any shopping’s needed.’
‘Has Regina woken yet?’
‘No. I peeped into Katie’s bedroom and she’s spark out too. I envy them. I always find it hard to sleep past my normal get-up time, even if I’ve had a disturbed night.’
‘So do I.’ As they entered the kitchen he stole a sideways glance at her, opened his mouth and closed it again.
‘Did you want to ask something? As long as it’s reasonably polite, go ahead.’
‘I wondered what you’d been doing with yourself over the years. Did you ever finish your degree?’
‘No. Father prevented that. He didn’t trust me again.’
‘Why the hell did you stay with him?’
‘Faute de mieux. I had no money and nowhere else to go and . . . there were other threats.’
‘You could have got a job. Other people support themselves.’
‘There are things you don’t know, things I don’t want to talk about because they’re too . . . painful.’ And because most times when the subject of depression and mental hospitals came up, people began to look at her differently, as if she were less than human. She didn’t think she could bear that sort of look from him on top of the insults.
She went to the fridge and peered inside, checking each shelf, then opened the freezer door and studied the contents, after which she investigated the pantry cupboard. ‘I think she must have been due to go shopping because there’s not a lot here. And if you’re still a hearty eater—’ She remembered him having a big appetite and . . . better not go there.
‘I am.’
‘Then I’ll have to visit the shops. I think I know my way to the shopping centre in Wootton Bassett.’
‘Bassett. Locals shorten it to just Bassett.’
‘Oh. Right. What do you want for tea?’
‘Whatever you like. Let me give you some money towards it.’ He fumbled in his pocket.
‘After I get back.’ She went up to get her handbag and, after another peek at her sister, left.
Brody stayed in the kitchen, making another piece of toast and eating it slowly, thinking about Miranda. She didn’t look her age. But she did look toned down, as if someone had taken all the vivid colour out of her. He remembered suddenly that she used to start looking like that just before he took her home from university, and always insisted on being dropped some distance away from the house. What the hell had her family done to her?
‘Good morning.’
He turned to see Regina come into the kitchen, her hair ruffled, her face creased where she must have lain on something with wrinkles in it. She headed straight for the kettle.
‘I’m not human till I’ve had a cup of very strong coffee.’
‘Help yourself.’
‘Where’s Miranda gone? It was her car engine starting up that woke me.’
‘Shopping. The cupboard’s almost bare.’
The phone rang and he hurried across to pick it up. ‘Katie! How is he . . . ? Oh, good. That sounds promising. Yes, we’re fine. Ned’s still asleep. He had a disturbed night so we didn’t wake him or try to send him to school. I hope you don’t mind . . . Miranda? She’s gone out shopping for groceries . . . No, it doesn’t matter. We’d have to eat anyway.’
He listened intently. ‘Look, stay as long as you like, as long as you need. We’ll be fine.’
Her next words annoyed him but he tried not to let that show in his voice. ‘Yes, of course I’ll give her a chance to explain. But she’s refused to do that once already this morning, so don’t hold your breath . . . OK then. I’ll wait to hear from you.’
He put the phone down and saw Regina scowling at him. ‘What?’
‘Was it Miranda you were talking about just now? The one you’ll kindly allow another chance to explain?’
‘Yes.’
‘She won’t do it.’
‘Why the hell not? Don’t you think I’m owed an explanation?’
‘Yes. So I’m going to do it for her.’ Regina took a sip of coffee, hot as it was, then gestured to the dining room. ‘Do you mind if we sit down? This might take a while.’
He followed her into the next room and sat at one end of the oval table, wondering what could be making her look so bleak. ‘Well?’
She took another sip of coffee. ‘I’m guessing you haven’t a clue what happened after Father found out about the baby?’
‘Only that Miranda refused to see me.’
‘She didn’t refuse. They kept her prisoner.’
‘What? In this day and age? Not possible.’
‘She was so upset they insisted on calling in the doctor and Sebastian made sure she stayed at the house till he arrived. Sebastian has always enjoyed bullying and manhandling people.
‘The doctor was quite elderly, old-fashioned about women. He gave her sedatives of some sort. I don’t know what. I was fifteen, keeping out of their way, terrified by all the screaming and shouting. Sebastian held her down while the doctor gave her an injection. It must have been a strong one, because she slept for hours.’
He watched impatiently as she took another slurp of coffee.
‘I don’t think they let her surface properly till she was in the mental hospital,’ Regina said at last.
Brody stared at her, feeling sick. ‘Mental hospital? Why the hell was she in a mental hospital?’
‘Because the doctor put her there. And he continued to treat her, if you can call that treating. It was a private “home”.’ She waggled her fingers in the air to mock the word. ‘After Miranda had the baby, they still kept her inside, still kept her tranquillized. From what I overheard, she wanted to keep the baby and refused to sign the adoption papers, so Sebastian forged her signature. I found a screwed-up piece of paper he’d been practising on. He was pretty good. It’d have fooled me.’
Regina waited again, head cocked on one side as if expecting some comment, but Brody couldn’t speak for horror. In the end he managed to ask in a croaky voice he didn’t recognize as his own, ‘How did they get away with it?’
‘Well, it was made easier because she really did have post-natal depression. Or was it just depression about what had happened? I don’t know. They didn’t let me visit her, but Father commented one day that she couldn’t stop crying and she was in the best place. I think he’d persuaded himself by then that she really needed to be in there.’
Brody shook his head, near tears himself. ‘It’s hard to believe it was possible to do that.’
She raised one eyebrow. ‘A respected judge like Father, a family doctor who hadn’t a blemish on his record, the owner of a special home who liked extra payments? It wasn’t all that hard to arrange. I’ve pieced together the details over the years from things they’ve let drop.
‘There u
sed to be a tradition of shoving people into mental hospitals when they did something socially inconvenient, you know. In the early seventies a Director of Social Services called Derrick Sheridan found several women in mental hospitals in the UK who’d been put inside and kept there merely for having illegitimate children. No one had done anything about them till he took over, but because he had a background in mental health, he understood that area and its needs. Forty years some of them had been inside. And this was the seventies, not the Dark Ages.’
‘I’m surprised they ever let Miranda out.’
‘They didn’t until she was thoroughly cowed, and they kept her on tranquillizers for years afterwards. In the end she found herself another doctor and since she didn’t cause any trouble they let her come off the tablets. But by then they’d destroyed her self-esteem and confidence completely. Other people helped them unwittingly. Those who’ve been inside mental hospitals are often treated with suspicion afterwards, as if they can never truly recover.’
‘But she stayed at home and looked after him until he died.’
‘Yes. Amazing, isn’t it? But remember she had no money, no history of employment either, because she’d never been employed. I got away from Australia, made sure they couldn’t meddle with my life. I think Father set himself out to charm her after he’d had the stroke. He could be good company when he wanted, and he needed someone to look after him.
‘After he died, she met a man called Lou Rayne, and he was the one who broke her out of her shell, the one who started to build up her confidence. He was dying and yet he took the time to look after her. That man must be in heaven, if anyone is.’
Brody tried to speak and couldn’t. He found tears welling in his eyes, tears of outrage at what had been done to her, tears of remorse at what he’d thought about her, accused her of.
How could he ever make that up to her?
Would she even care now what he thought?
She was remarkably self-contained most of the time, like a walled citadel. He could see why. But now he wanted to break down the walls and find the old Miranda who’d been stolen from him. Surely she was still there?
Katie switched off her phone and slipped it into her handbag, smiling down at her husband. ‘Ned’s fine, still asleep. Brody said Miranda was out shopping and I’m not to worry. They can stay there and look after Ned as long as necessary.’