I’m trying to push back tears. I had absolutely no idea Mona felt this way about me, and it touches a place deep inside that’s never been touched. Burying my face in Stella’s head, I surround myself with the scent of baby. “Thank you.”
Those are the only words I can push past my tight throat, and I can’t help but think I’ve finally found the place I belong.
Tank
“You okay?”
Blaze and I are cuddled up on one of the pool loungers, both full from the food we ate. The night has turned off a bit chilly, and I curl a blanket around us that Renegade brought over not too long ago. She’s been quiet for a while, and I’m worried someone’s upset her.
“I’m good,” she gives me a sleepy smile.
“You’ve been quiet since I started grilling. Was my food not good?” I tilt her chin with my index finger, forcing her eyes to meet mine.
She stretches against me, shaking her head. “No, everything was great. Your mom said something to me and it kind of shocked me. She welcomed me to the family.”
I love my mom, she always knows the right things to say. “That means she likes you, and she’s right. You’re totally a part of this family now.”
“It felt good, but weird at the same time. You saw how my mom is and what my life was like. Your mom is amazing and to know she approves of me in your life gave me a sense of belonging I didn’t know I needed.”
I lean in, pouring every bit of feeling, of love, of how much I need this woman into the kiss I give her. Coaxing open her lips, I kiss her with an unrestrained passion I’d normally save for behind closed doors, but it’s a must right now. Pulling away, I press my forehead against hers, enclosing us in our own cocoon. My voice is just above a whisper. “Don’t you know, Blaze? You’ve belonged to me since the first moment I saw you. You’ve owned me from the first moment I tasted you.”
She hugs me tightly, and for the longest time I think she’s not going to say anything, but then she pulls back. “I’ve always been scared to completely let my emotional walls down with you, Trevor. I can be sexual any day of the week, and I know you’re good with that, but sometimes I do that to hide how I feel. After telling you about Annabelle, I think I’ve started to let go of some of the walls and guards I’ve had up.”
“You never have to hide your true self from me, if there’s one thing you should know about me by now it’s I love all of you. Not just the good and easy parts, but the ones that force me to dig a little deeper. I lost you once, Blaze, I’m not going to be a dumbass and lose you again,” I frame her face with my hands. “No one else would have taken care of me the way you do, no one else would have put their lives on hold to be by my side. You saved me, and you changed me. I love you more than I could ever tell you, express to you, or show you. So I’ll just spend the rest of my life trying to become worthy.”
She sniffles, her green eyes wet, eyelashes incredibly long with tears spiking the ends. “I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to become worthy of you, because everything you said, is exactly how I feel, too.”
There, underneath a clear Alabama sky, holding the woman who changed my life, I’m not worried about the future, because I know we’re gonna make it.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Blaze
Two Months Later
I enter The Café with a huge smile on my face. Today’s been a great day. In what’s become our regular booth, I see Trevor waiting for me, wearing his hot as fuck white t-shirt with his bullet proof vest over the top. It’s too hot for them to wear their button-down shirts and this is what most of the guys look like around these parts right now.
“I’ll be right with ya, Blaze. He already ordered your drink,” Leighton tells me as she gives me a grin.
Not long ago she started waitressing here, and she seems to have acclimated well. “Sounds good.”
As I approach the booth, Trevor stands up, grabbing hold of my hand and bringing me in for a kiss. “Hey, hot stuff,” he whistles between his teeth as he sees the dress I wear with my Louboutins. “Look at you, how did your meeting go?”
“Hey, handsome,” I kiss him, gripping him around the waist as he motions for me to sit in the booth. We’re same-side sitters and everybody makes fun of us, but I love being pressed up against his hard body. I curl my hand around his bicep, grabbing for my drink. “It went well, they approved me!”
“I’m so damn proud of you, and I know Annabelle is, too.”
He hugs me to him with his arm around my neck, and I revel in the scent of his cologne. Nothing makes me feel more at home than that smell and the scratch of his beard on my forehead. “I’m proud of myself,” I admit. “I wasn’t sure if the bank would go for it, if they’d be willing to release my trust fund to me. Ya know so I could turn around and basically give it away.”
“You’re gonna change people’s lives, Blaze. I mean completely change them. People who weren’t sure if they were ever going to have a chance will have one now, because of you.”
I duck my head because it’s embarrassing to get this much praise. All I want, more than anything, is for someone besides me to have a memory of my sister, and I know the Annabelle Coleman Foundation will do just that for so many people. My goal is to give anyone with a mental illness the chance to get help, regardless of age, race, or creed. I want to make it readily available in our community. “I’m talking to the attorney tomorrow about finishing up the paperwork to make everything legal, and I’m looking at the building down the street from the EMS station for a possible office space. I’m excited Trevor, more excited about this than I have been for anything in a long time – I feel like I’m making a difference. We should be able to start talking to groups next month!”
“You are, babe, you’re changing the world, one day at a time. Hell, you changed mine just by being in it, imagine what you’re going to do when you set your mind to it.”
His unwavering faith is all I need, and it’s everything I’ll ever want in this life. No matter the trials I’ve gone through, I’m damn lucky to be where I am now.
Tank
I head back to work with a smile on my face, I’m so damn proud of Blaze. She’s taken a situation many people wouldn’t have been able to understand and is turning it into a platform to help others in the same situation. Not many people in this world would give away their money like this, but the woman I love? She’s amazing like that.
As I head up the steps to the station, Holden comes barreling out the door. “You okay?” His face is a mask of anger and what appears to be frustration.
He motions for me to follow him behind the building. “We got a threat at the house last night and I’m trying to track who’s doing it without Leighton finding out.”
“Gotta be her family, man. They’re scared to death she’s going to give them up.”
Holden turns around, putting his hands on his hips and looking up at the sky. “The shitty part about this whole situation? She’s not giving them up, she refuses to talk about it, but you and I both know her family won’t believe that, ever. The only way I’ll get them away from her is to either arrest them all, or beat the shit out of them,” he shakes his head, chuckling darkly. “That’s somethin’, ain’t it? A man who’s sworn to uphold the law, looking to beat the shit out of another human being.”
“No,” I answer quickly. “It’s not. Sometimes it’s the only thing you can do.” Immediately my mind goes back to the night I confronted my sister’s ex-husband, Stephen.
“I saw her face, you motherfucker. I saw what you did to her. Did you think I’d let that shit go? You think I’d not listen to her?”
I advance on him, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, lifting him off his feet, and shoving him into the nearest wall.
“Trevor, aren’t you sworn to uphold the law, not break it?” he taunts me.
“I’d give it all up for her, and you know it. You think it’s fun to beat on someone smaller than you? Does it make you feel like a man? How about you beat o
n someone closer to your own size. You get one free shot, and then I’m going to tear your ass up.”
A part of me half expects him to not do it, he’s a lot of all talk and not much action. I’m surprised when I feel his fist connect with my cheek. When it does, I feel my rage explode and I go to town on him. As I feel his skin break and his bones crack, I think of my sister’s black eye, the wounded look on her face, and the way she’s changed since she married him.
I know this asshole is to blame and he’s going to pay tonight. Luckily not with his life, but maybe by the time I’m done, he’ll wish he had. For once I’m going to let the control I normally have over my anger and emotions go, and he’ll wish he’d never met my family.
“So what do you suggest?” Holden’s voice brings me back from my memory.
“You protect her,” it’s as easy as that for me. “Anyway you can, whatever you have to do, you protect her. If there’s anything I’ve learned in the past few months, it’s that we as humans are capable of amazing things, especially when we’re pushed to the edge. Ask yourself what you’re willing to do for her, because I know exactly what I’m willing to do for Blaze.”
“You love Blaze,” he reminds me.
I lean in close, because I respect the man in front of me. He’s my boss, but he’s also my friend. “Holden, don’t kid yourself. You’d do whatever it takes to keep her safe. You and I both know that.”
I give him a wave as I go into the office, ready to finish out my shift and get home to the love of my life.
EPILOGUE
Tank
August
“I didn’t expect to see you here today,” I lean over kissing Blaze, who looks gorgeous in her sundress and sandals. The turquoise color she’s picked makes her look like The Little Mermaid with her red hair.
“I gave a talk at the high school about mental health awareness,” she explains, putting a bag on my desk. “Then I went and got a piece of pie from The Café, because when your arms aren’t available, chocolate and coconut make it all better.”
I get up from my seat, enveloping her in my arms. “Why have chocolate and coconut when my arms are yours whenever you need them?”
She burrows her head into my chest, and like always, it makes me feel like I’m the strongest man in the world. To know this woman counts on me to be her anchor in the storm that’s sometimes our lives is the biggest blessing I’ve ever received. “You okay?” I kiss her on the forehead.
“Yeah,” she whispers. “Sometimes it’s hard to talk about her, but I’m really proud of the work I’ve been doing in the past few months.”
I’m proud of her too, more than proud of her. She took something that would have broken a lesser person and is making a difference in the community. There are open forums now on mental health, where people who are suffering can come to speak to counselors without fear of repercussions. She’s being the change when before she didn’t know how to be. “You’re doing amazing things, and I’m beyond proud to call you my girlfriend.”
“Anyway,” she runs a hand over her face. “I stopped by The Café to get my pie and figured you and Ryan might like some lunch.”
“You’re going for girlfriend of the year. Did you bring us pie, too?” I start rifling through the bag she’s put on my desk.
“Did I hear pie?” Ryan asks, rubbing his stomach as he makes his way into the squad room.
“You did, I brought you two lunch and pie.”
We sit down to have lunch with her. I enjoy my time with her now more than I ever have. We’ve been through a lot, she and I. Finding our way back to each other, living through a medical emergency, and doubts that could have torn us apart. We’ve thrived through all of it, after that first hiccup. She’s stuck by me and I’ve stuck by her. One day soon I’m going to give her my last name and make it legal, but for now I love the life we have. It’s got to be right for the both of us, and it’s not right for her yet. She has work to do, people to save.
More than anything I realize now, that’s what Blaze was put on this earth to do – to save people. Regardless of whether it’s from the back of an ambulance, my sister’s living room, or giving a speech to a high school gymnasium full of kids. She’s got a calling, and she’s fulfilling that calling like the amazing woman she is.
“I’ll see you at home tonight?” I ask as I finish eating my last bite of pie, rubbing my stomach as I groan. “Damn, that was good.”
“Yup, I don’t have to go in tonight. I switched with the new recruit out of Birmingham. She wants to get a few more hours in. I think she wants a few more hours with Logan, but that’s just me,” she gives me a grin.
“You think so?”
“Ohh yeah,” she nods, standing up to hug me bye.
As we’re breaking apart, Leighton strolls into the squad room, her eyes connecting with Holden’s. Without a word they go into his office, shutting the door.
“Wonder what that’s about?” Renegade asks as he looks at me.
I know exactly what it’s probably about, but I don’t say anything because it’s not my place. “Who knows with those two, all I know is he’ll do anything to protect her, and none of us knows how far he’ll go.”
Since Blaze and I got together, we’ve somehow escaped the Laurel Springs rumor mill and they’ve moved on to Holden and Leighton. No one knows for sure what’s going on, because they’re both tight-lipped about it.
“I’m gonna go, glad you guys enjoyed your food,” she leans in, kissing me on the cheek before she gives Renegade a hug. “We’ll be over to see Stella this weekend.”
“Maybe I can talk you into letting me and her mom have a date night?” he gives her the smile he uses when he wants to get his way.
“I think that could be arranged as long as Trevor’s okay with it.”
I’ll do anything for my sister, and they both know that. “Order us a pizza and you’ve got yourself a deal.”
Blaze leans in for another kiss, and I take the opportunity to grab her ass, pulling her closer to me. Have I mentioned how much I love it when she wears dresses. I’m leaning against my desk, laughing as she keeps trying to leave, but I keep pulling her back in. If anyone had told me a year ago this would be my life, I would have said they were crazy.
But my Blaze has shown me more than I ever imagined. I’ve pushed her away, loved her, worried her, and said some things along the way I didn’t mean. She never let any of it get to her, never believed anything other than the truth that we should be together.
When I grasp her around the waist one more time, whispering in her ear, Holden’s office door opens. Every eye in the room goes to where he and Leighton stand. He’s wearing a suit, and she’s wearing a white sundress. None of us know where they’re going, but she’s carrying flowers and he’s got a ring box in his hand. Mouths hang open as we watch them leave, neither one of them saying a word.
“Did that just happen?” Blaze asks, looking up at me like she’s seen an apparition.
“I think so, don’t ask me what it was, but I think that just happened,” I move my lips down to her ear. “That’ll be us soon.”
“Only if you can keep putting up with me,” she fires back, sass in her voice.
“We do pretty well putting up with each other,” I clasp our fingers together, bringing our hands up to my mouth, kissing her fingers. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you, and I think you know that. You’re everything to me, Blaze.”
“Right back at ya,” she leans her forehead against my chest.
And just like that, right in the middle of the squad room, I’m at home and at peace because she’s with me. She never gave up, and she never let me down. Because if there’s anything that can handle the steel of a tank – it’s the heat of a blaze.
THE END
Havoc releases August 2017!!!
Sneak Peek of “Havoc”
PROLOGUE
Leighton
Sometimes I wonder what would have happened, had I never met Holden Thomps
on in a capacity other than an official one having to do with his job. Our civilian introduction is kind of a funny story. It involves a shot of whiskey and my first game of truth or dare. In this small-town my last name is synonymous with Moonshine, anything illegal, and now the accident that injured Trevor Trumbolt.
A year and a half ago though, right before Whitney Trumbolt and Ryan Kepler became an item, I’d stood up to my family, and had gone to Birmingham for one semester of college. It was the first time I rebelled, and ultimately I paid for it, but the night I truly met Holden Thompson is ingrained in my brain forever.
“C’mon Leighton! You mean to tell me you’ve never done anything reckless?”
I swallow the drink of beer I sucked down hard. Reckless? My whole family is reckless, but me? I like to stay on the fringes, obey the law, and do my absolute best to be a good person. Growing up I was lucky if I was able to ride on a different seat on the school bus without someone telling my dad. He believed on keeping a tight leash on what many dubbed the Princess of Moonshine. I figure maybe a half-truth is better than an out-right lie. “Depends on what you mean by reckless.”
One of the other girls we’re sitting with does the shot in front of her, hands me one, and grins at me. “The next man to walk through that door,” she points to the entrance. “Is gonna be kissed by you tonight.”
I’ve never played ‘truth or dare’ or any of those games most girls played at sleepovers; truth is, I was never invited. Everyone was scared of my family. This is my shot, in some ways, to live pieces of life I’ve never been able to. If that means taking a shot of the alcohol in front of me, and kissing the next man who walks through that door – no matter how not my type he is, I’ll do it. Even if it’s only to say I’m part of this group.
Tank (Moonshine Task Force Book 2) Page 18