But when he imagined the scene, he pictured Samantha with him.
The feel of Nick’s lips on hers had lingered while he gave Samantha a tour of the house, while they’d eaten their picnic lunch in silence, and during the bike ride home again. The feel of the kiss lingered still as she lay in bed that night, sleepless, staring upward in the darkness.
“Maybe we should forget I did that.”
She couldn’t forget it. How could she? She felt like a drowning woman getting her first gasp of air after an eternity. She hadn’t known how much she’d longed for a kiss—how much she’d longed for his kiss—until it happened.
“I wanted to kiss you. You can’t know how much I wanted it.”
Couldn’t she know? Was it as much as her own longing?
“I don’t think I should have given into what I wanted.”
Why not?
“Because we’re only friends,” she answered herself aloud. “That’s why.”
Then he answered in her memory. “It isn’t fair to you.”
Nick was right, of course. It wasn’t fair to her. It wasn’t fair to either of them. Once upon a time there had been the possibility they could find long-term love. That time had passed.
She touched her lips with her fingertips. Warm, as if the kiss had just ended.
Maybe the time hadn’t passed. Perhaps it wasn’t an impossibility. Maybe she could change his mind.
Maybe . . .
Chapter 23
Nick caught up with Samantha and Ruth on their way to the church parking lot following the Sunday service. He greeted them both, then addressed his question to the older woman, afraid if he asked Samantha, he would be refused. “Would you mind if I stole Sam for the rest of the afternoon? I’m taking a drive up into the mountains and was hoping for her company.”
“That’s a grand idea,” Ruth answered.
“Gran. You’ve got people coming for Sunday dinner. I should be there to help.”
Ruth shook her head. “Only Camila and Emilio are my guests today. We’ll fend for ourselves quite nicely. You go with Nick.”
Samantha looked at him, and his pulse leapt. For he didn’t see the expected reluctance. Her eyes said she wanted to go with him. Relief flooded through him.
He’d thought a lot about what had happened the previous day. Somewhere along the way, he’d determined to explain his reaction to Samantha. He’d decided he would, at last, follow Derek’s advice, that he would put aside the last remnants of his tattered pride and tell all.
“What exactly are we doing besides driving?” Samantha asked, adding, “so I’ll know what to wear.”
“We’ll grab something to eat on the way. And if we find the right spot up in the forest, we’ll walk a bit. Let Boomer chase a stick or chipmunks or whatever. No strenuous hiking. Just a nice stroll. Sound okay?”
She nodded. “Sounds okay.” Her smile was tentative. And perhaps hopeful?
“Can you be ready in about twenty minutes?”
“Yes.”
Determination shot through him. If the chance came to kiss her today, he wouldn’t apologize.
“Great. I’ll be there.”
Half an hour later, the two of them, along with Boomer, drove out of town. The wind whistling through the open windows made it hard to have a conversation without shouting, so they traveled in silence until they stopped at a drive-through to order burgers, fries, and milkshakes. Even Boomer got to indulge, although his quarter-pound burger was plain with no bun. Nick tore the meat into pieces, and they disappeared in a few bites.
Samantha laughed as the dog turned a pleading look in her direction. “You’re not starving. You eat too fast.” She ruffled his ears.
Nick grinned. “I’ve told him and told him not to scarf down his food, but he doesn’t listen to me.”
“Silly dog.” She looked up. “I guess you can’t complain. He minds you in every other way.”
“Yeah, he does.”
She stroked Boomer’s head but kept looking at Nick, happiness sparking in her eyes. His mouth went dry and his breath caught in his chest. He loved her. Loved her more than he’d thought possible.
He’d danced around that word—love—even when he’d admitted he wanted to share the future with Samantha. He’d danced around it for weeks. Since his brother’s wedding. Maybe even longer than that. He couldn’t dance around it now. He loved her. Deeply loved her. Sure, there were difficulties to be overcome. Location. His health. Even hurts from the past. But if it was in his power to overcome them, he would.
Samantha breathed in the pine-scented air as Nick steered the truck along the winding highway. Sunlight and deep shadows alternated in the canyon forged by the river. The changing light was almost blinding, and she was thankful she wasn’t driving. She would much rather enjoy the beauty of nature all around them than pay attention to the road.
The pickup rounded a curve and slowed when a bridge came into view. “Here we are,” Nick said. “That’s got to be the south fork of the Payette.” He turned onto the connecting road right after crossing the bridge.
Both the shadows and the forest deepened. The river beyond Samantha’s door now thundered and foamed.
“That’s something to see, isn’t it?” Nick steered the pickup into a parking area. “Let’s get out and walk awhile.”
“All right.”
Boomer seemed delighted with the idea. He dashed around the trees, sniffing the blanket of pine needles that covered the ground. A chipmunk scolded him from a high branch, and the dog barked his annoyance.
“Come on, boy.” Nick turned toward Samantha. “I saw a trail down closer to the river. Let’s see how far up it goes.” He held out his hand for her to take.
It seemed such a natural thing to do, and she smiled as his fingers closed around hers.
“Have you been up here before?” he asked.
“No. I’ve been past the junction on the way to McCall but never turned this way.”
They crossed the highway and descended to the trail along the riverbank. When they got there, Nick stopped and pointed up river.
“Look!”
She did so in time to see a large yellow raft buck its way across rough rapids. The four passengers inside the raft hooted and hollered, oars held above the water.
Her heart rose into her throat, and she had trouble breathing.
“Amazing!” Nick cried as he waved at the rafters with his free hand.
Amazing? More like terrifying.
As if in answer to the thought, the raft crashed down hard and one of the passengers—a woman, by the high-pitched sound of her scream—was thrown into the water. She disappeared for an instant, then rose to the surface.
Nick released Samantha’s hand and hurried to the river’s edge. He grabbed hold of a shrub and gave it a hard tug, then leaned forward, ready to grab the woman, who was bobbing and flailing her way toward him.
Boomer barked a warning but stayed beside Samantha, as if sensing he would be in the way.
“Nick!” Samantha cried. “Be careful!”
If he heard her, he gave no indication. His focus was completely on the woman in the water. At least she wore a helmet and a bright-yellow life jacket, making it easier to see her.
Samantha lifted her gaze to the raft. The remaining people were paddling toward the bank; they shouted but she couldn’t understand them. She looked back at Nick in time to see him lean out as far as the shrub and his arm would allow. He caught hold of the life jacket above the woman’s shoulder. The rush of the water and weight of the woman jerked him downward, and for a moment Samantha thought he would lose his grip and be pulled downstream with her. But instead, he managed to drag her onto the bank. He collapsed beside her, breathing hard.
Samantha moved forward, heart hammering.
“Are you all right?” Nick asked the woman as she struggled to sit up.
She coughed and nodded, then coughed some more.
“Nick?”
He glanced over
his shoulder. “She’s okay.”
But it wasn’t the stranger Samantha had been worried about. It was Nick.
Shouts came from behind her, and she turned to see the other rafters running toward them from down river. She moved out of their way and observed the hugs and heard their joyous laughter. She watched as each one of them, in turn, shook Nick’s hand and thanked him for what he’d done. The celebration went on and on.
Finally, Nick broke away from the little group and stepped toward Samantha.
“You’re wet,” she told him.
“I’ll dry.” Excitement filled his voice.
“You took quite a risk.”
He shrugged. “I made sure I had a good hold.”
Samantha wished she could say the same, but watching him had left her feeling as if she were the one caught in the swift current of a river, bobbing up and down and in danger of drowning.
“Come on.” He reached for her hand. “Let’s keep walking. I’ll dry off faster that way.”
She didn’t think he cared about his wet clothes or the danger he’d been in. All he looked was pleased with himself. Begrudgingly, she admitted the rescue might have been necessary. But the woman had worn a helmet and life preserver. She might have made it to the riverbank without his help. Someone who hadn’t nearly died in a different river could have gone to her aid.
The lively sparkle in Nick’s eyes as he waited for her to take his hand seemed to say he hadn’t felt this good in a long time. In fact, it seemed to say that he would give just about anything to have been in that raft with the others.
“Hey.” His smile faded. “Where’d you go?”
He hadn’t changed as much as she’d hoped. He was still a risk-taker.
“Sam?”
“I think we should head back.”
He lowered his hand. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” It was a lie, and she was certain he knew it.
“I was hoping we could find a place to sit and . . . and to talk.”
They should talk. He was right about that. She should tell him how his recklessness made her feel. But she was too rattled to discuss it. All she could do now was shake her head and say, “Let’s go home.”
Frustration set his jaw. “Okay, Sam. I’ll take you home.”
Chapter 24
A few days later, Ruth had a follow-up appointment with her orthopedist. Afterward, she and Samantha stopped for lunch.
“The doctor says I’ll be out of this boot and into a splint in another five weeks.” Ruth slid onto the seat of the booth. “And that means I’ll be able to drive again. I am so ready for that.”
“Gran, you’re going to make me feel unwanted.” There was a teasing glint in her granddaughter’s eyes.
Ruth was glad to see it. Samantha hadn’t seemed herself lately. Ruth longed to ask why, but something in her granddaughter’s demeanor kept her from posing any personal questions.
“The next five weeks will go by in no time,” Samantha said.
“I confess I’ll be happy when I can get in the car and go someplace whenever I want. I’m used to more independence than this injury has allowed.”
Samantha picked up the menu from the table. “Mom says we come from a long line of strong, independent women.”
“Very true.” Ruth smiled, images of her mother, grandmothers, and aunts flooding her memory. “But not so independent that we haven’t loved our families with our whole hearts.” She touched the back of Samantha’s hand. “Just as I love you.”
“Thanks, Gran. I love you too.”
Ruth saw the tinge of sadness in her granddaughter’s eyes. She’d seen it there for the last several days. She could only guess at its cause, although fear and lack of confidence were almost always at the root of Samantha’s unhappiness. This much she had become aware of through the years.
The server came to take their orders. Both Ruth and Samantha ordered salads, although different kinds.
Alone once more, Ruth was about to pick up the conversation where they’d left off, but Samantha’s phone rang, stopping her. Her granddaughter looked at the screen, hesitated, then tapped Accept. “Daniel.”
Ruth heard the male voice of the caller but not the words.
“No, that hasn’t changed. End of July.” Samantha looked down at the table. “Sorry, Daniel.”
Pretending disinterest, Ruth unwrapped the napkin from around the table service and carefully smoothed it flat before placing it on her lap.
“You’re joking. When exactly?”
Ruth glanced up and tried to read Samantha’s expression.
“I see . . . No, I don’t think so . . . Yes, I could manage that . . . Of course. I’ll let you know . . . All right. Good-bye.” Her granddaughter lowered the cell phone from her ear and tapped the screen to end the call.
Ruth sensed an internal struggle and held her breath.
Samantha dropped the phone into her purse before meeting Ruth’s gaze. “That was my boss.”
“It sounded important.”
She shrugged. “Maybe. He says I’m being considered for a promotion. In fact, he’s certain it will happen this time.”
“When will you know?”
“He wants me to fly to Portland on Friday to attend some meetings.”
“That’s not much notice.”
“I know. But I could go and come back on the same day. As long as there are still seats available, I can catch a flight at six in the morning and land back in Boise before eight at night.”
“You know the airline schedule off the top of your head?”
“No. Daniel checked before calling me.”
“That was thoughtful of him.”
“Thoughtful? Maybe. But that’s not usually a term I apply to Daniel.” She drew a deep breath as she lowered her eyes again. “This might be the best thing for everybody,” she said softly.
Ruth wondered if she’d been meant to hear the comment and waited for an explanation. She didn’t get one.
“You’ll be all right if I decide to go for the day?”
“You know I’ll be fine. And Camila is right out in the shop if I need anything. You go do what you need to do and don’t worry about me.”
Marti Barbera—a casual friend, as well as a colleague— awaited Samantha at the curb outside the Portland terminal, where she’d texted she would be. Samantha dropped her briefcase into the backseat before joining the other woman in the front.
“You look good,” Marti said before merging into the busy airport traffic. “Time away has been good for you.”
“Thanks. How’s it going for you at the office?”
“All right, I think. Daniel doesn’t like me much, but I don’t think he can complain about my work any longer.”
“Daniel doesn’t like anybody.” Samantha released a humorless laugh.
Marti didn’t join in. “He likes you.”
“Me? No. He depends on me is more like it. He’s been my boss almost from the start of my employment at Whitewater. He’s used to me.”
They fell silent for a while, allowing Marti to negotiate the rush-hour traffic without distraction. Once they were safely on the freeway and into the flow of weekday commuters, Marti took up the conversation as if they’d never left off. “I think you might be wrong about Daniel. He does like you. I heard he put your name forward for that new position and has been pressing the big bosses to approve you for the promotion.”
That would be a change, Samantha thought as she stared out at the drizzly morning.
The closer they got to their destination, the more she felt like an old-fashioned alarm clock that had been wound too tightly. It wasn’t nerves about the scheduled meetings. It wasn’t even anxiety over whether or not she would get the promotion. But what was the cause of this crazy feeling?
Whitewater Business Solutions was located in a three-story brick building on several acres of land. Flowers bloomed on all sides as well as in planters and beds scattered throughout the parking area and t
he perimeter of the property. The interior design, especially the lobby and meeting rooms, had an understated, yet elegant appearance.
“Welcome back, Sam,” the receptionist said with a smile.
“Thanks, Theresa, but I’m not back yet. Just visiting for the day.”
She and Marti headed for the elevator and rode up to the third floor. Once there, Samantha received more words of welcome from various coworkers.
“Samantha.” Daniel stepped out of his office as he spoke. “Glad you made it.”
She gave him a smile and a nod. Marti excused herself before heading in the opposite direction.
Daniel looked at his watch. “We’ve got half an hour before the first meeting.” He motioned toward the desk behind him. “I’ve got a few calls to make. You might as well look over things in your office, see what hasn’t been done while you were away, and then we can go to the board room together.”
“Sure.”
But she had no intention of looking over things in her office. She wasn’t back yet. She was on leave, and she trusted Marti. Instead, she walked to the break room to get herself another cup of coffee. When it was ready, she settled onto a chair and took her first sips of the strong brew—a drink that couldn’t compare to her grandmother’s.
It took a few moments of sitting in silence for Samantha to realize how unusual her response to her boss had been. In the past she would have done his bidding almost before he let it be known. She not only would have looked things over, she would have squeezed in as much work as possible before the meeting. Being on leave wouldn’t have made a difference to her. For that matter, she’d worked more than once while on vacation. But not today.
A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth, and the tightness that had begun inside of her on the commute released. She felt confident. No, more than that. She felt unafraid.
It was a good feeling.
Nick left the office in Caldwell shortly after four o’clock. He’d spent the last few hours untangling a supply snafu. Thankfully, he didn’t need to go out to the worksite again. He could call it a day.
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