“Mom, I didn’t feel like I could turn Alice down, either. I didn’t agree to her request without a lot of thought and prayer. She’s really uncomfortable with Zibarro’s bedside manner—or lack thereof, I should say. And she wants to try a home delivery. She fired him as her doctor before I even met her. And I examined her earlier this week and checked on her case history. I couldn’t find any reason to turn her down. Cowering about Dr. Zibarro just doesn’t seem like a good enough reason.”
“She’ll be fine, Mom,” Shar said. “Especially if she and her midwife friends get this clinic together.” She looked at Kendra. “I think that will give you more clout in the medical community. There are probably plenty of people at the hospital who think of you as a nurse and nothing more.”
“She’ll still need her hospital privileges,” their mother said. “She needs to be able to handle the emergency births and the births for women who want to deliver in the hospital.”
Kendra noticed Steven’s helper, Marty, looking uncomfortable. Or possibly just bored.
“We should let Steven and Marty get going. That desk isn’t going to refinish itself.”
“Right.” Steven took Marty’s glass and started to walk in the direction of the kitchen. “Back here, right?”
Shar stepped forward. “Here, I’ll take those.” She made a cutesy face at Kendra. “You kids go on out there and say your good-byes. And pipe down there, Marty. It’s hard to get a word in edgewise with you around.”
Steven chuckled and shook hands with Shar and her mother. “Nice meeting you both. I’ll see you later.”
He and Kendra walked out the door with Marty. Kendra heard Shar talking to their mother as the door closed: “Don’t worry, Mom. It’s all going to work out great. And how cute is he, huh?”
Kendra shot a glance at Steven. He seemed busy with the keys to his truck. “Did you hear that?” she asked.
A concentrated focus on the keys. “Hear what?”
She kept her eye on him. “Nothing.”
“You mean how cute I am?”
Kendra laughed and lowered her voice. “Actually, I think she was talking about Marty.”
Steven looked over at Marty, who had already climbed into the truck’s passenger seat and shut the door. “He’s a good kid. Studying design at the University of Oregon. He wants to learn woodworking, so I’m letting him apprentice with me for the rest of the summer. He’s a hard worker.”
Kendra simply nodded. They looked at each other for a moment. She was never quite sure how to say good-bye to him. Their circumstances didn’t seem to allow for even the hint of a good-bye kiss, even if they were ready for that. There was always some interruption, it seemed.
“Speaking of which,” he said.
For a moment she was afraid she had just thought out loud. “Uh, speaking of what?”
“Hard workers. Like you. When do I get to take you out again? Surely you can’t be delivering babies every day. Can we schedule an evening soon? Like tonight?”
She laughed, and he rubbed the back of his neck, pretending chagrin. “Not that I’m desperate or anything.” He gave her a genuine smile. “I have a very full life, you know. Hugely popular. Lots of stuff going on.”
“I can see that.” Yes, she would certainly appreciate his giving her a kiss right now. She hadn’t noticed before that he got dimples in his cheeks when he smiled just so. “Um, yeah. How about this weekend? I’m free Saturday.”
“Perfect. And I wanted to find out if you had Fourth of July plans. Marianne is having a big cookout before the fireworks.”
“Yes, she mentioned that to me.”
He stepped away as he spoke. “Let’s go together. Shock the townsfolk.”
“Oh, I’m sure tongues will wag.” She started back toward the house, but she turned to speak again. “We’re pretty fascinating people, after all.”
He stood at his door and opened his arms to gesture toward her and back toward himself, drawing a line of connection between them. “What’s not to love, right?” He flashed a smile and got in the truck.
She tilted her head and spoke softly: “I haven’t come across anything yet.”
Chapter 10
Here, Kendra. You’ve got to taste this. Marianne made it from scratch, she says.”
Steven extended a spoonful of peach ice cream to her, and she swallowed it with pleasure. Marianne never ceased to amaze her.
“Oh, that’s terrific. I should have gotten that. But the cheesecake brownies looked too good.”
“Hey, it’s July Fourth.” He stretched out his long legs. “Have both. I’ll share this with you. I kind of enjoy feeding you.”
She gave him a half smile. “I kind of enjoy it, too.”
Noisy, happy people surrounded them as they lounged near Marianne’s pool, but they acted as if they were completely alone. They had no other choice.
Since the day Steven met her mother and sister, they had managed two dates. The first one had ended with his rushing her to Ellie’s delivery. Ellie had introduced Steven and Kendra in the first place, and she invited Steven to wait downstairs—an offer he promptly chose to decline. The second date started at his workshop, where they decided to meet before going elsewhere, but Marianne showed up unannounced, all hormonal and needing Steven’s company. So they brought her along with them for the evening, despite her embarrassed protests.
Now he leaned toward her as if he were going to tell her a secret, so she leaned forward, too. He had brought her to that calmness she told him about before. It was one of the qualities she liked the most about him.
“You know, we always start out just fine when we get together,” he said.
“That’s true.”
“But there’s something about the second half of our dates—”
“You noticed that, too, huh?”
He nodded. “I did. So I was thinking. I know we have, what, maybe three hours left tonight? Who knows what might happen? So I was wondering if I might ask for my good-night kiss right now—you know, just to play it safe.”
A rush of heat ran up her neck. Silly, really. She felt they were far overdue. But by their putting it off as they had, it had become more special. “Well, I don’t know. If we have to discuss it—”
He bridged the short distance between them, hesitated for a moment as if assuring permission, and gave her a soft, warm kiss that tasted like peach ice cream and felt like heaven.
Marianne’s voice broke through the moment: “I’m so sorry, you two.”
They looked at each other for a second before chuckling. Steven gave a subtle shake of his head. “Told you.”
Kendra sat up straight. “No problem, Marianne.” She saw genuine concern in Marianne’s face then and felt bad for their cavalier response to her interruption. “Is something wrong?”
“It’s Alice. I think her water broke.”
Kendra stood at once. “Where is she?”
Marianne turned, and both Kendra and Steven followed her. They rushed through the crowd. It was obvious no one knew anything was amiss.
Steven spoke over Kendra’s shoulder. “Is this serious?”
They reached one of the bathrooms, and Marianne tapped quickly on the door.
Kendra turned to him. “It is if her water broke. She’s not even seven months along yet. This is way too soon. We might need you to get us to the hospital. Can you run out to your truck and get my bag?”
She went into the bathroom and found Alice in the empty tub. She was obviously in pain. Not good.
“Are you having contractions, Alice?” Kendra dropped to her knees beside the tub.
Alice spoke through clenched teeth: “I don’t know if that’s what this is or not. It hurts.”
“Let me check you—” And the moment she did, she knew. Dear Lord, help us. Please help us now. “Okay, Marianne, get me a robe or something we can drape around Alice. And tell Steven we’re definitely going to need him to drive us to the hospital.”
“Should I call 911?”
; “No, we can get her there faster. But get me a phone, okay? Alice, was the water clear?”
“Huh?”
“When your water broke. Did you notice if it was clear or not?”
“Oh.” She grimaced with pain. “No. Not clear. It was nasty.”
Alice’s husband, Lonnie, opened the door, panic in his eyes. He held Kendra’s bag. “Alice? You okay, baby?”
Marianne stopped him. “Got your phone on you, Lonnie? Give it to Kendra, quick. Steven—”
Marianne shut the door as she left, and Lonnie dropped to his knees next to Kendra, fumbling to get his phone out of his pocket. The normally husky man looked suddenly small, as if he were folding in on himself.
Kendra took his phone and her bag. “Lonnie, put your hand here on the baby’s head. Just apply gentle pressure.”
He gasped when he did what she asked. “That’s the baby’s head?”
“Yes, I’m afraid so. Alice, I know you’re hurting, but try not to push, okay?”
She called the hospital and yanked her stethoscope from her bag. She tried to hold the small cell phone between her shoulder and ear while she searched for the baby’s heartbeat. She spoke the moment the emergency room receptionist answered with the standard greeting. “Is this Tanya?”
“This is Tanya, yes.”
Good, one of the more quick-witted ones.
“This is Kendra Silverstone. I’m five miles from the hospital with a severely distressed twenty-six weeks with a possible prolapsed cord.”
Alice started crying, and Kendra raised her voice to talk over her.
“The mom’s nearly complete, and her water broke. Meconium present. Have the obstetrician-on-call waiting for us.”
“Got it. Heartbeat?”
Kendra had been searching with her stethoscope. “I haven’t found one yet.” She grabbed at the phone and tossed it on the floor.
Marianne barged in, a large white terry-cloth robe in her arms. “Here you go, Alice, honey, it’s my maternity robe. It’ll cover everything. Steven will drive you in my car.” She looked at Kendra as they wrapped the robe around Alice. “The Mercedes will be easier for her to get in and out of.”
Kendra nodded and mouthed the word pray. “Lonnie, switch places with me. Can you lift her out of there and go with me to the car?”
He lifted Alice as if she were a feather.
“Good,” Kendra said. “I’m going to stay right next to you and keep pressure against the baby’s head. Marianne, can you grab my bag there?”
They followed Marianne through the house, which had become still, despite the crowd of people there. Everyone had moved toward the back of the house to get out of the way.
Kendra spotted Steven in the foyer. Their eyes met, and for a flash of a second she remembered the first time they saw each other. His eyes now held the same intensity she noticed then. But the playfulness was gone. He held the front door open and then got to the car ahead of them, opening doors and helping to get Alice and Kendra in the back.
“Steven, drive as safely as you can, but get us there yesterday.”
Twenty minutes later Kendra and the doctor confirmed what Kendra had feared the moment she examined Alice. The baby had been dead for hours. Alice was inconsolable, but Lonnie, sobbing, stayed with her to try.
Kendra held herself together until she left Alice’s room, but when she entered the waiting room and saw Steven, she broke down. Marianne had followed them in his truck, and the three of them embraced.
“What happened?” Marianne asked between tears. “I thought she was doing well with the pregnancy.”
“She was. I examined her last week, and she was fine. She said she felt good until this afternoon, when she—”
“Yeah, that’s right. When they got to my place, she said she felt a little sick to her stomach. A little feverish. Should she have told you?”
“Yes, but I think it was already too late. I think this happened yesterday. That’s the last time she remembers the baby moving. She just didn’t realize that until the labor started.”
“So what happens now?” Steven asked.
“They’re keeping her overnight at least. Lonnie wants to stay in her room, and they’re going to let him. The doctor wants to observe Alice, and the coroner …” She choked on her emotion and had to stop talking.
Steven had his arm around her and squeezed her to himself. “Let me drive you home.”
She nodded. “Thanks. Oh, Marianne. I should tell you.” She put her hand on Marianne’s shoulder. “The OB on call is Gina Chastain.”
Marianne stiffened. The woman responsible for ruining her marriage was just on the other side of the door. Kendra didn’t know why she told Marianne, but she simply felt she should know.
“She did everything she should have done for Alice.”
Marianne’s lips were thin when she looked to the ground. She said nothing.
Neither Steven nor Kendra spoke much on the way to her house. Kendra felt she carried so many sad issues on her shoulders when they walked to her door. Finally she spoke, and she felt the weight in her voice. “On top of Alice and Lonnie’s horrible heartbreak, this incident will obviously be reported to Dr. Zibarro by morning, if Dr. Chastain hasn’t already called him.”
Steven hugged her and kissed the top of her head. “Don’t think about that tonight. That kind of pressure will diminish for you once you have your own clinic.”
She pushed away from him. “Don’t you get it? There’s no way I can hope for a clinic after this.”
“But this wasn’t your fault. Right?”
“That won’t matter.”
He tried to hug her again. She could tell he was trying to make her feel better, but she wasn’t ready for that. The hug felt suffocating.
He said, “You’re just upset right now, like we all are. But don’t give up so easily. Tomorrow—”
She pushed away again. “Don’t tell me not to give up. It’s not like you’re out there blazing a trail in the construction business.”
He frowned. “What?”
“Just don’t tell me what to do.” She heard herself and knew she was being mean and childish, but she couldn’t seem to stop. “Look, I need to be alone right now. Thanks for the ride. Thanks for helping.”
She turned away from him and half expected him to try to stop her. But he didn’t. When she looked over her shoulder, she noticed his angry stomp back to the truck.
The first thing she saw when she trudged across her threshold was the light on her answering machine. The last thing she wanted to do was check messages, but there was always a chance the call was about Alice, so she hit Play.
“Hello, Kendra Silverstone? This is Vance Chaney with the Willamette Gazette. I wondered if I might talk with you about the incident at the hospital tonight. I’d appreciate it if you could give me a call.”
Chapter 11
She didn’t return the reporter’s call. She called Shar the next morning, after a sleepless night.
“I guarantee Alice was perfectly healthy, Shar. The baby was perfectly healthy.”
“Come on, Kendra, go easy on yourself. Of course they were healthy, right up until they weren’t. You’ve had years of experience. You know sometimes pregnancies go wrong. This can’t be the first time one of your patients miscarried.”
She shook her head. “Preterm delivery. Alice was twenty-six weeks. But no, you’re right. It’s rare and horrible, but it happens. It’s just the other circumstances around this loss. I don’t even feel like I can give Alice proper attention, because I’m hesitant to run into that reporter or Zibarro or who knows who else.”
“Well, you’re just going to have to tough it up, sister. You need to go see Alice.”
Kendra nodded. “I know. I have every intention of going to her this morning. But pray I say the words she needs to hear, okay?”
“You got it. It’s going to be all right. Remember, you didn’t do anything wrong. Praying is a good idea.”
Kendra heard f
rom her mother shortly thereafter. She realized it might have been a good idea to ask Shar to keep the awful news quiet for a while.
“Honey, I’m so worried about you. This is exactly the kind of thing Antoine Zibarro was waiting for—”
“Mom, don’t you think I know that? Could we please talk later? I need to try to wake up and get into the hospital to check on Alice. Her situation is more important than mine right now.”
“Well, I think they’re pretty well intertwined, don’t you? You shouldn’t have taken on—”
“I’m sorry, Mom. I don’t want to interrupt you. But I honestly have to talk with you later. Okay?”
A sigh. “I’m sorry, too, honey. You don’t need to hear this right now. Tell me what I can do for you.”
“Pray. Alice needs comfort and hope. And I need guidance and protection.”
She didn’t hear from Steven. Or Marianne. That was certainly no surprise. She figured he had probably told Marianne how horrible she was to him.
Every time she thought about how vicious she sounded, she wanted to crawl under a rock. How could she have struck at the one remotely vulnerable thing he had told her? She knew his parents pushed him to be more aggressive, or at least more commercial, with his carpentry. She understood her own relationship with her parents well enough to know Steven probably hurt a little at his parents’ pressing him like that. If they thought he should be doing something other than what he was doing, he probably sensed some disappointment on their part. Grown man or not, that was likely a tender spot. So, of course, that’s exactly where she hit him. How dark was her heart, to come up with such a harsh comment?
Before she left to visit Alice, she spent some time on her knees: Lord, soften my heart. You know what Alice needs to hear from me today. Please put the words in my mouth that will help her now. You and I both know how poorly I can choose my words, especially when I’m tired and emotional, which I am right now. And guide me, Lord. Please. Are You trying to guide me away from what I’ve always thought was my calling? Is that what’s happening here?
Alice and Lonnie were amazing. Their hearts were broken. But Dr. Chastain had assured them that the baby was lost because something wasn’t developing as it should.
The Midwife's Legacy (Romancing America) Page 24