by Sara Orwig
“Amen. His blood is in my veins, though. I don’t want any part of settling down.”
“That’s a shame,” she said. “You’re good with Amelia.”
“I still feel nervous, but not as much as I did. Each day I feel closer to her. I hope she likes the ranch.”
“She’ll love it because it’s her home.”
“I suppose you’re right there. Think you’ll look for work in this area after you get your degree?”
“I’ll look, but I’ll go where the job is.”
“That’s good. If you end up somewhere else, will you come back and see us?”
“I can’t answer that one now. Amelia may not even remember me because she’s so young.”
“I’ll remember you,” he said and she laughed.
“I’d hope. You’ve known me forever.”
The later they talked, the longer they were together, the more he wanted to hold her and kiss her.
She finally stood and the last time he had looked at his watch, it had been after one in the morning. He guessed it might be after two. When she reached to pick up her glass and plate, he stood, his fingers closing around her wrist lightly.
“You don’t—” Cade had started to tell her she didn’t need to carry her dishes to the kitchen. The minute he took her slender wrist, the words vanished.
He drew a deep breath while a tingling current sizzled and sent his temperature soaring. He had made a tactical mistake, a monumental blunder in his effort to keep everything between them professional and to keep his distance.
That polite, remote relationship of boss and nanny morphed into hot and steamy desire that blasted him. He tried to get his breath as he looked at her.
His eyes had long ago adjusted to the semidarkness. He could see her wide-eyed stare and the knowledge that she felt the heat between them made his temperature soar higher.
“Erin,” he whispered.
“Oh, no...” she whispered with her voice trailing away.
“I’ve tried. For this whole damn week I’ve tried to leave you alone, to ignore what I feel, to ignore what you obviously react to. We’ve both tried. What is so wrong about a simple kiss? I’m not going to steal your heart with a couple of kisses.
“I think your brother has lost all sense of perspective,” Cade continued, drawing Erin closer. “I don’t want to hurt you, but it seems maybe we’ve forgotten that kisses can be meaningless fun,” he whispered, slipping an arm around her waist while he could feel her pounding pulse in the wrist he still held.
“Erin,” he whispered. She turned her face up while both her hands now rested on his forearms.
He leaned down to cover her soft lips. His gentle kiss changed to a demanding, passionate kiss that went deep as his arm tightened around her and he held her close against him.
Instantly, arousal rocked him. Powerful. Undeniable. Too late he realized he had been wrong about her kisses being meaningless fun. She set him on fire and he wanted to kiss her all the rest of the night and through tomorrow. He wanted to make love to her, to seduce her, to never let her go.
As she kissed him back, her mouth was soft, tempting, her tongue an erotic invitation. Her kisses almost buckled his knees and made him hot with desire. He ran his fingers through her soft hair that fell over her nape while he continued to hold her close and kiss her.
“Erin,” he whispered, trailing kisses along her throat, down the open V of her sundress, feeling her softness that made him shake with desire. He tried to control it, to hold back, but every move from her only fanned the fire enveloping him.
She pressed against him, her arm holding him tightly. Her other hand stroked his nape, her fingers winding in his hair as she returned his kiss as passionately as he kissed her.
His roaring pulse drowned out all other sounds. Her hips shifted against him and he groaned, wanting her more than he could ever recall wanting any other woman. How could she do this to him? How could her kisses be so spectacular and make him have to struggle to keep from carrying her off to the nearest bedroom?
He should stop, but that was impossible. He knew her kiss wasn’t harmless or meaningless, but it also was only a kiss and they couldn’t go beyond it. He could continue to kiss for a few more minutes and then he’d have to put an end to the pleasure. He’d have to put the pieces back together afterward because they would have to resume that impersonal nanny and boss relationship.
Right now, though, all he wanted was a beautiful, stunning woman’s bone-melting, passionate kisses that were turning his world upside down.
He couldn’t keep from running his hand so lightly down her back, feeling her tiny waist and then letting his hand drift lower over the sexy curve of her trim behind, down the back of her thigh that had only the sundress between his fingers and her warm leg.
Her hand closed over his wrist, holding him tightly against her waist until she broke free and stepped back. She released his wrist as she gulped air, trying to get her breath.
“I think we made a mistake, Cade,” she whispered. “But it was just once.” She gasped for breath as she stared at him without moving. “We can get over that and our kisses won’t matter. Kisses that will be forgotten. That’s the way it has to be for me to stay here. I’m not risking my heart and you’re not interested in anything serious so we both know what has to happen. No more kisses and no flirting. I know you understand.”
“It was only kisses, Erin,” Cade said. Even as he said the words, he knew their kisses were far from trivial. He’d never had the reaction to kissing a woman that he had with her. Not another woman in his life and he had known some beautiful, sexy women, including one supermodel and one starlet. Both of them should have melted him just from their looks and they had been sexy and exciting, but he couldn’t remember their kisses. He knew tonight had been different, far more intense, far more unforgettable. It was the unforgettable part that shook him.
Everything about Erin shook him from the instant she’d opened the door to his office and stepped inside. He should have thanked Luke and hired one of the women from an agency.
He was in deep trouble now. It was taking major willpower to keep from reaching for her to get her back into his arms. With his whole being he wanted to kiss her again.
He couldn’t tell how much reaction she was having. She seemed shaken, but she also had just been through a lot of emotional upheaval.
“Erin—” he said, starting to step toward her. She held up her hand.
“Wait a minute, Cade. I want to tell you good-night and go to my suite. You stay right here. We’re not walking through the house together. For a few minutes neither one of us used common sense. We’re getting back to that. I’ll see you in the morning.”
She hurried into the house and as he watched her go, he wondered if she’d be able to stick to that vow. He knew there would absolutely never be any getting back to the way they were before their kisses.
Not for him.
Five
Erin rushed to her room, first stopping to check on Amelia and then going to her suite, closing each door as if she could barricade herself from what she felt.
Cade’s kisses had shattered what little peace she had gained. She had never responded to any man the way she just had to Cade, which shook her almost as much as the end of her engagement.
Disturbing her even more, she had almost married Adam, who had never made her feel the way Cade just had. She had only worked a week on this job. She was going to be with him for months to come.
She ran her hands through her hair. Why hadn’t she listened to her brother and done exactly what he’d said? He had warned her about Cade—warned her that Cade drew women effortlessly.
It wouldn’t be a simple matter of avoiding kissing him again. Every inch of her tingled and desire was a raging fire inside. She wanted his k
isses, his caresses, his lovemaking—something she wouldn’t have dreamed possible when she took the job. She had known she ran a risk to her heart, but she never thought about this hunger for passion. And she couldn’t let go and make love without her heart being involved. There was no way sex could ever be casual to her. Her emotions were always tied up in close relationships and intimacy was the strongest emotional tie.
If she didn’t guard against more kisses, she would have a giant heartbreak, something she didn’t want to go through. Not again. Why hadn’t she been more careful?
She shook her head and crossed the room to get ready for bed, but she knew there wouldn’t be any sleep for hours.
Every inch of her tingled for Cade’s touch, for his hard body pressed against her. She tried to stop thinking about him, placing her fingers against her forehead as if to force out the thoughts.
“Luke, you were right. Oh, you were right. I should have listened,” she whispered in the empty room.
Stunned that she had such an intense reaction to Cade, she realized it was probably a reaction to all she had been through. She realized she must be vulnerable to wanting to be loved, to make love, to lose herself in passion that temporarily could drive every vestige of heartache away.
At least she hoped that’s all it was. It had been over a year since she had been with Adam, even kissed a man, and there had been no one since him until tonight.
Her reasoning calmed her nerves for about one minute, until she remembered Cade’s kisses. Who was she kidding? Her reaction to him wasn’t just because of her breakup. It was a physical reaction to the man himself. No other man could simply look at her and make her heart skip a beat. No other man could enter a room and make her pulse jump. No other man could have that effect on her.
It was totally physical, a mutual attraction that she was certain Cade didn’t want any more than she did. He was a party guy, never serious, against marriage, unnerved by becoming a guardian. His situation and his attitudes made him the kind of man she planned never to get involved with. Yet she had this intense, heart-pounding reaction to Cade that stopped all her logical thought processes and drove her to do what she knew she would regret.
In his own quiet way Cade was great company. Her brother had always liked him and considered Cade his best friend. Luke trusted Cade and respected him. He also realized how he was about women and long-term relationships.
So why hadn’t she heeded Luke’s advice?
It wasn’t too late. She could get over a kiss. She needed to keep things in perspective and simply avoid becoming more than his employee.
Could she do that for the next few months with him?
Could she do that with Amelia, as well? Or was she going to get hurt again by people she loved? Little Amelia didn’t intend to hurt anyone, but after a few months of caring for her, Erin wondered how much it would hurt to tell Amelia goodbye.
If she wasn’t careful Erin knew she was going to lose her heart to Amelia and Cade. Sighing in the darkened bedroom, she decided she was making a mountain out of maybe just an anthill. Not even a molehill.
Hereafter she just had to resist him no matter how difficult it might be. When she put Amelia to bed, she would stay away from Cade the rest of the evening. It was that simple.
She stepped out of bed and pulled a chair to the window. Was Cade sleeping peacefully? For a moment she wished he was in as much turmoil as she was, but then she hoped he slept quietly and had forgotten their kiss and was thinking about who he could ask out next Friday night instead of staying home with his little niece and her nanny. If only he would do that, she might be able to sleep again.
* * *
Cade woke and heard Amelia’s chatter. He cautiously opened the door to her bedroom. She sat up in her crib and spotted him the minute he cracked open the door. She smiled and held out her arms, babbling incoherent sounds.
He had to laugh as he crossed the room to get her, picking her up. “Aren’t you the shameless charmer, using all your wiles to get me to rescue you from that prison of a morning bed? Holding out your arms and looking adorable, babbling cute little sounds that make me want to hug you, smiling at me as if you’re not up to something and trying to bribe me with a hug. You look adorable, warm and cuddly. That’s shameless, Little Miss Heartbreaker. Of course you got what you wanted—a big strong man to rescue you. A chump who will cater to your every whim and try to find exactly what you would like. You flash that cute smile and gaze at me with those big blue eyes and blow bubbles and get exactly what you want without being able to say one word to me. You don’t even know how to point to what you want me to get for you, but somehow you manage to get everyone to give you what you want and do what you want and entertain you, sing to you, read to you, even swim with you.”
She laughed as if he had said something very funny to her, making him laugh in turn.
“I think you know you’re the cutest little child ever, don’t you? I suppose I need to get you changed and dressed. Either that or go wake your nanny, which I would enjoy doing, but not with you in my arms and probably a little on the damp side. You just hang on and be patient and let me find you something comfy to slip into—and I do mean slip into.”
Smiling, she made smacking sounds with her lips and he had to laugh.
“You’re adorable, Amelia,” he said, hugging her and setting her back in the crib. “Let me get you changed here and then later your nanny can fix what I’ve done.”
Twenty minutes later Cade placed Amelia in her high chair and leaned down to look at her as she smiled at him. Yeah, he’d do most anything to make her happy.
Soon he sat facing her, placing her sippy cup with milk on her tray. “I don’t know what to feed you. Did you know I made your nanny unhappy last night? You don’t know or you wouldn’t be nearly this happy with me because you like your nanny. I don’t blame you. I like her, too. And she is just flat-out beautiful. And so are you, Little Miss Charmer. Now I’ll give you some yummy juice and try to find something you like for breakfast. Okay? And if I don’t do so well, your nanny will be out of bed soon and come to your rescue. Or maybe she’ll come to my rescue.” He laughed at himself. “She’s had a long night’s sleep...unless she couldn’t go to sleep at all. I couldn’t and it was all because of your beautiful nanny. What do you think of that?”
He didn’t expect the reply he got.
“I think I shouldn’t have overheard your very personal conversation.”
Cade turned and saw Erin standing in the doorway and his heart skipped. She was in cutoffs and a T-shirt and her hair was up in a ponytail. She looked younger and sexier than ever, and he couldn’t keep from letting his gaze drift over a pair of million-dollar legs.
“Lady, you should be a model. Those legs could grace any ad.”
“Thank you very much. That improved my morning,” she replied, “as well as your one-sided conversation with Amelia.”
He grinned and shrugged. “That’s what you get for eavesdropping.”
“It was far too much fun to stop you. Whew! I’m very flattered.”
“You should be, although I could have done better talking to you in person.”
“I think we’re doing what we each vowed not to do,” she said. “Maybe I should go out and come in again and we can both forget everything before that.”
“Not on your life, darlin’,” he drawled while he fed Amelia a bite.
Relief filled him. Last night when they had parted, Erin was upset and he had been swamped with guilt. This morning he was glad to find her smiling and flirting with him, no longer upset with him.
He glanced over his shoulder to see her moving around the kitchen and he assumed she was getting her breakfast. With her back turned, he took another long look at her legs and inhaled deeply because the air in the room had suddenly become blazing hot. In a moment Erin walked closer as s
he looked at Amelia.
“You’re doing a fine job and she’s happy, but I’ll relieve you if you’d like.”
He glanced at the plate in her hand with a piece of toast and a bowl of fresh berries. “Is that your breakfast?”
“Yes, it is, and I can eat as she eats.”
“You go ahead and I’ll continue what I’m doing as long as she’s happy.”
“Don’t say I didn’t give you a chance. You do pay me to take care of her, you know.”
“That’s right, but I need to learn how to so when you’re not around, I’ll know what to do.”
“It’s pretty simple and it looks as if you’re getting the hang of it. Let me know if you want me to take over.”
“Thank you. We are doing just fine,” he said, giving Amelia some more cereal and smiling as she smacked her lips. “She is a noisy eater.”
“She’ll grow out of that.”
“I hope so before she’s a teenager.”
“Since when did you get so scared of teenagers? You were one back there in your past, you know.”
“I think you’re laughing at me again. If you suddenly found yourself the guardian of a teenage boy, wouldn’t that shake you?” He glanced at her and shook his head. “Ignore that question. You deal with kids, so it probably wouldn’t give you a moment’s concern.”
“Stop worrying about how you’ll be with her more than twelve years from now. That’s ridiculous, Cade.”
When he looked at it like that, he guessed she had a point. Twelve years was a long time to learn. In the meantime, he’d enjoy raising Amelia, with his nanny’s help, of course. Speaking of her nanny...
“Let’s get Maisie to stay with Amelia tonight and go out to dinner,” he suggested. “You deserve a break.”
She laughed. “Thank you, but I think we need to keep everything very professional between the guardian and the nanny.”