“All I need is another great baker to help me get all the orders done and to help out in the shop…” She wiggles her eyebrows and nudges my knee with hers. “What do you say?”
“What do I say about what? You are not asking me to work for you!” I try not to sound too eager, but I can’t help it. This would be my dream job and well, my boss would be pretty kick ass.
“No, I am not.” She puts her hands on her hips in mockery.
“Oh.”
“I want you to be my partner.”
My stomach flips and it flops. My jaw hits the floor, “I must have had too much wine or you laced those cupcakes with something, because I thought I just heard you say ‘partner’.”
She laughs and I really hope that wasn’t all a joke, “Yes I want you to be my partner! Please? It’ll be great, especially if you can make other desserts just as fucking fabulous as this cheesecake!”
“But, you hardly know me.”
“I know a good one when I see it. So it’s final. You know Sweet Cheeks just in town?”
“You own Sweet Cheeks? I love that place!”
“Well, now you help run it. And I want you to start right away, can you do that?”
“I just need to figure out something with one job and then I am yours,” Reality is I need to be there for Mrs. Brown, but I am sure she will understand and I could still do part time. Yes, this will work. Finally I am getting something that will make my life a little better.
“So, Miss Margot, tell me about you.” She sits straight up and I suddenly feel like I’m on an interview and even though I already have the job, I feel like I am going to be sick from the question. I can’t lie to Fancy.
I suck on my bottom lip and think about how I want to go about telling her about my life and if I will tell her about… No, that can’t come out yet. I am not ready to surface that. “Well, I was given up by my parents and was tossed around into different group homes and foster families.”
She has a dead stare on her face. Maybe I shouldn’t have been so blunt about it. But what tone do you set yourself at when telling someone about never being wanted?
By the time I am done she has a box of tissues out and we are snuggled up on the sofa with blankets and more wine. She never apologized for the things that happened to me and she is the first. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me or what has happened to me. I don’t. If I didn’t go through any of that then who would I be today?
She stands up and throws her tissues away in the kitchen and come back with a bottle of rum, Pepsi and glasses. “We need something harder.” She giggles and I join her. “Now…” She pours us each a drink, “You and Derrek.”
Uh oh.
“Are you and he…?” She closes her eyes, bites her lip and starts to gyrate her hips. I cover my mouth to stop me from spitting out my first sip.
“No!” I blast out a little louder than I intended. “We are just friends…”
“The way he looks at you, I doubt that. I also saw how Justin looks at you, two guys want you.” She is amused.
I shake my head. How do I convince her, when I can’t convince myself? “Okay... Justin flirted with me a little and I told him I had a boyfriend…”
She stops me, “The douche bag, who you are for some reason still with…”
“Yes. Anyways, I told him we had to be friends. He is trying. Derrek though…” I trail off.
“Uh huh, you got it for him don’t you Killer?”
“I can’t though. It’s complicated, but the things he makes me feel and…”
I stop and blush.
“He makes you hornier than a high school boy at the Playboy mansion.”
I nod and look away. This is the first time I had admitted that I am turned on by Derrek. “The thing is, I hear he has a reputation. Do you know anything about that, since he is your coach and all?”
“He has made his rounds yes, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t changing. At the past few practices he seems to be somewhere else. His head is in the clouds. It all makes sense now, he was thinking about you.” She places her hand on mine and I feel like I have gained a full on sister. “Question is, what are you planning on doing about it?”
That night I stayed at Fancy’s but snuck out before she got up. I cleaned her kitchen before leaving though and a note thanking her for everything.
I had my talk with Mrs. Brown and she was really excited about my job opportunity and she said she would hire on another staff member to pull the other half of the work I can’t be there for.
I had a shift at the diner Sunday and I knew I had to give Joe a notice that I was going to be leaving. “But you’re my best girl on the floor. You don’t sass the customers like Tina does.”
“I am sorry Joe…”
“Ah, no you go live your dream, just be sure to drop by with some treats,” He pulls me into a big bear hug and I thank him for everything and assure him that I wouldn’t go until he can find my replacement. As happy as I am to be on my way out of the place, I will miss Joe the most.
Sunday night I stay at the library, Maddy has company. She is now entertaining her “fun” friends there in the evenings. I knew it wasn’t going to last long, but that was a new record.
Monday night I did the same.
And Tuesday night. The library was more comforting than my own home. I need to go home though to get in a shower and grab a change of clothes.
I go to unlock the door and find it already unlocked. Damn it Maddy, you forgot to lock the door again. I shake my head at her thoughtlessness. I guess she must have come home after her, well technically my shift to change and go out on a date. I set the mail on the little table by the door and drop my keys into the bowl and flick on the light. I gasp when I see our apartment thrown all about. The table and bits of furniture are flipped and the TV and DVD player are gone. The wires and cables are pulled through the living room.
I grab my keys and run out the door. I have my phone in hand and I try to call Maddy and when she doesn’t answer I try Josh. Nothing. I know it’s late and he is probably sleeping, but I decide I have nowhere else to go that’s safe and so I can call the police. I am speeding through the empty roads and I am at his place pretty quick. I run up to the door and I use the key he gave me a long time ago, but I have never used it much. I unlock the door quietly, in case he is asleep, I don’t want to startle him. I close the door behind me and I see that there is no light on. I make my way across the large living room and into his hall. I see a sliver of light from under the door, he occasionally falls asleep with his TV on.
I turn the knob quietly and I try to tiptoe in.
“Margot!” Maddy’s voice shrieks.
Numb.
Josh’s head snaps to me with his back on his white sheets. She is on top, riding him. I see it all. I see his cock inside of her and my head spins. I turn to leave the room and I run into the door jam. Knocking my head hard, I touch my head and feel the warmth of the blood.
I hear the rustling of sheets and a room of profanity. I get across the living room and out the door. I can’t. I just can’t. I get outside to Blue Belle and my head is pounding and I can feel the blood running down the side of my head. I see his window open and he is leaning out of it calling to me, but I just ignore him. I know he won’t make a scene, not in this neighborhood. I go to start the car and it doesn’t start on the first or second try, but on the third as I start to pull away I see Maddy coming out of the door in one of Josh’s button down shirts and that just puts the icing on the cake.
I am just down the road and my head can’t take anymore, I have to pull into a gas station. I pull out my phone. Who do I call? My best friend and my boyfriend were just fucking one another. The only two people who I let into my life. This is beyond fucked up.
I go to the first number I can land on in my phone.
So I text Derrek where I am.
My phone rings instantly, “Hey.”
“What’s wrong? I’m on my way. What happened? Why aren’t you home?
” He bombards me with questions.
“I’ll answer all of that when you get here.” My head it starting to feel light and I hang up the phone and rest my head on the headrest. I know I shouldn’t fall asleep in case I have a concussion, but closing my eyes sounds like a fabulous idea right about now. My body feels light and I allow my eye lids to close, but my head is pounding from the impact and I have a flash of what I cannot un-see when I do close them.
I see Derrek come sliding into the spot next to mine. I watch as he shoots from his car and his muscles are tense and his jaw is set in a tight line. He opens my door and his eyes shoot open, “What the fuck happened Margot?” He stops and then leans in close, “Jesus Christ your head is bleeding!” I feel him pulling me out of Blue Belle.
“Thank you for coming.” I tell him slowly. I sigh, he smells so good. He must have had a shower. I touch the back of his neck as he is placing me into the car and I can feel water droplets coming off of his wet hair. He was in the shower, the thought and visual makes me smile. Then I am flooded with the visual of them. My skin crawls.
He grabs a towel from his back seat and wipes the trickling blood from my face and hisses through his teeth. “Hold this right here,” Referring to the towel. I do what I am told and he is in the driver seat and cruising down the road and we are at a hospital in record time, that or everything was just a blur that it seemed that way.
He pulls me up to the door and a nurse is coming out with a wheelchair to help me. I feel goofy taking a seat in it, because I just have a little cut on my head. The nurse brings me to triage and tells me that I’m lucky there is one even available tonight. I suppose it’s been a busy one. She helps me up onto the bed and I watch a very anxious Derrek at the curtain. I can tell he wants to ask and hear about what happened.
Another nurse comes in and logs in on a computer and starts to ask me questions, name, date of birth, any allergies and the whole nine-yards. The one working on me, gather up the supplies and starts the irrigation process as she explains. She has to flush and clean out the wound in order to see how bad it really is. As she is cleaning they ask me what happened.
“I ran into a door jamb.”
Derrek shoots me a look and he is asking me if it is true with his eyes and I nod yes at him. His arms are crossed over his chest and he starts to open his mouth, I know he is dying for answers, but won’t ask when we have company.
“Oh, this isn’t bad at all my dear!” The young southern nurse tells me. “Just a little gash. The bleeding has stopped on its own, but I will put a butterfly clip on it to ensure it stays closed.” Derrek exhales with relief. The little southern nurse turns to look at him, “This wasn’t your fault now was it?” She is giving him the look of death.
His eyes go wide and his hands shoot up, “No ma’am!” He gasps.
With her hands on her hips she slits her eyes and stares at him. When she is satisfied from “reading” him, she drops her hands to her sides and smiles, “Okay, good.” Turning her attention back to me, “So how did you meet with the door jamb?” She asks with a little laugh. I roll my eyes and wince at the pounding headache I now have, which only reminds me of why and how I got hurt to begin with. “Let me grab you something for the pain.” She heads out of the room with the other nurse, leaving me and Derrek a lone briefly.
He doesn’t speak, he just sets his eyes on me. I look over to him where he stands by the curtain divider. I’m sitting on the exam table, I am picking at the nail polish on my fingers and I wait for him to come over. He un-crosses his arms from his chest and finally starts over to me. He stands right at my knees as my legs dangle off the edge of the table. He takes my hands to stop me from chipping anymore nail polish off.
I refuse to cry about this. I knew it was a broken relationship from the first moment I met Josh. Not just because of his social standing and my lack of, but how we worked or didn’t for that matter. I look away from Derrek, ashamed that I even let a jerk like him waste my time for so many years. I didn’t have any other offers from any other men since seeing Josh, or maybe I did, but I was too diluted to see it.
“Look at me Margot.” He sternly tells me.
I feel my shoulders jump with his sudden tone. I instantly look up at him. His eyes change right away once he sees my pain in mine.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you jump. What happened Honey Bee?” He asks moving closer and his waist hits my knees. His already warm hands on mine get hotter. I think he knows it was something more than I was letting on with the nurse.
I open my mouth to start to explain, but close it when I don’t even know where to begin. He doesn’t pressure me, but just waits. “When I walked into my place it was torn apart and stuff was stolen. I walked right back out and got in my car. I tried calling Maddy to make sure she was alright, when she didn’t answer I tried Josh. When he didn’t answer I just drove over there, so I had a safe place to be and call the police. When I let myself in with the key he had given me, no lights were on except in his room. I figured he fell asleep so I went in quietly and that’s when I saw them.” He lifts my chin with his hand and I can see the sorrow in his eyes, for the pain I am feeling, but it still feels odd.
“Josh and Maddy.” He states, not questions.
I nod and he takes my face in his hands. “As much as I know this must kill you, I am glad. I am glad you saw it and didn’t have to second guess anymore. You have your confirmation to lose the fucker. And what the fuck kind of friend does that to someone? Someone who is supposed to be your best friend?”
“It’s odd. I almost feel nothing about it. I assumed he was sleeping with someone else. She was a slut, is. She likes to trick men into giving her things, so the relationship doesn’t surprise me. Did you know I wasn’t even allowed to wear heels, because they made him appear shorter?”
“Seriously? What a small dicked insecure shit face! Sorry for my language, but Jesus Christ! I mean your ass is slamming in heels!” That comment makes me smile and giggle.
“Knock, knock,” We hear from the other side of the curtain and the young nurse comes through with a little paper cup and a foam cup with water I assume. Handing both to me she tells me, “It’s just ibuprofen, but it should help with the headache you are having right now. I will get that butterfly on that head of yours and you are set to go.”
I smile, “Thank you,” I tell her and I quickly down the pain reliever. Derrek takes both empty cups from me and steps aside to let the nurse patch me up.
“So what do you want to do about your place?” Derrek asks me. I have been so wrapped up in the fact that I just saw the only two people in my life humping that I forgot my apartment was broken into and my stuff was stolen.
“Well, I need to call the police first…”
“I did that when you were being discharged and I was getting the car,” He informs me.
“So that’s what took you so long to bring the car around…” I side smile at him, in the car. “So what happened?”
“They need you to come into the station to give your statement. I told them you were in the ER and couldn’t do it right now.”
I look out the window as he speaks and I can see the sun starting to peak out from the horizon. I am mentally and physically exhausted. Without looking back at him, “I don’t know how comfortable I feel about going home alone.”
He takes my hand, “We will go up together and you can gather your important things and then I can take you where you want to stay.” I feel my heart clench. I don’t know how I am going to face Maddy and then to leave the only home I have known. Where will I live? I can’t move in with Derrek, that would be insane, but I need a place for a night. I could tell him to drop me off at the library after getting my things. It’s a place just to sleep for a whole day. I look to him and I smile a tight smile.
We walk up the stairs leading to my unsecure beacon of once was hope. My safe place was no longer safe.
Maddy isn’t home when I walk through the door. I don’t know i
f she even knows about the break in or not. Derrek walks in first making sure it is safe, when he looks back to me and gives me tight mouthed smile, I step in and take a better look around. The sun is starting to beam in and the mess is awful. Furniture turned, kitchen is a mess and most of our electronics are gone. Even my nice mixer I had saved up for. That stings a bit. Take my TV fine, Take my microwave, whatever. Take my three-hundred dollar mixer and you have me.
Derrek joins me in the kitchen, “Man, this is fucked. I am so sorry Honey Bee.” He puts an arm around my waist and kisses my forehead.
I feel the tears start to fill my exhausted eyes, “Okay, let me grab some stuff from my room.” He follows me through and as I push open my door I am greeted with an over turned mattress and my dresser is tipped completely. I assume the robbers weren’t happy that they didn’t find any pricey jewelry.
I step over my tossed clothes from torn out drawers and I see my blue ceramic fox cookie jar broken into a few large pieces. I squat down and just give up and plop on the floor right on my behind. I pick up the little pieces and put them in my lap. Derrek joins me on the floor and gathers up the thrown packets of honey. “This where you keep them?”
I nod and wipe my cheek.
“I can fix it up, with a little glue and some time it will be as good as new.”
“Sure.”
He picks up an ear off the hardwood floor and holds it up, “I didn’t know you liked foxes.”
“Always had a soft spot for them, I admire their way to survive without being seen. They have a bad rap with farmers and others, saying they kill their livestock and stuff, but they’re just trying to get by just like anyone else.” I explain.
“Did you know that a fox in some cultures are considered to be strategic, clever and known for their adaptability? They have a powerful mindset of what they want and they won’t stop until they achieve that they desire. A symbol of opportunity.” He tells me as he gathers the pieces from me.
“I did know some of that. I think that’s why I like them so much. They have a sense of purpose and they go for what they want or need. They don’t take no for an answer. Some traits I always wished I had…”
About Time Page 21