“I’m so sorry,” he said. His voice had become a whisper. And I realized that I believed him. This was my father. Somehow, somewhere, he’d come back to me. Where had he been all these years? I had so many questions for him. And yet, at the same time I didn’t want to know.
“You’re sorry? Really? Because . . . because . . .” I stopped speaking because I could feel the tears spring to my eyes. I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want him to hear me cry. I took a few deep breaths. “What do you want from me?” I finally said.
“I want to get to know you. I want to find out all about you. I want to say sorry for not being there for you. I want to meet you.” There was a sense of urgency and passion in his voice that I tried to ignore. I didn’t want to like this man. For years, I’d hated him.
“You want to meet me? Now?”
“It doesn’t have to be now. We can meet whenever you want. You just name the place, and I’ll be there.”
“I don’t want to meet you.” I tried to make my voice some firm, but I just sounded like a little girl who had no idea what she wanted. My voice was betraying me.
“Okay, I understand that. I didn’t expect you to just come running into my arms or anything like that. Look, I’m going to text you my number. Take your time. When you’re ready to meet me, please call me or text me back. Anytime, anywhere. I’ll be there. I promise. And I understand that you’re angry.”
“Oh no, you don’t understand anything at all,” I said.
I switched off the phone. I couldn’t listen to him pleading anymore. I wondered what I would’ve done if he had been in front of me. Would I have run away? Would I have hugged him? Would I have slapped him? Almost everything seemed possible.
A few minutes later I received a text.
I’m so sorry, Emily. I would love to meet you.
I stared at the message. Was this really happening to me? I didn’t reply.
I sat there for about ten minutes until I finally made my way back downstairs. My legs were wobbling so much I had to hold onto the railing for support. I felt that I could faint any moment and I was grateful when I got to the bottom.
“What’s wrong? You’ve gone pale. Who was that on the phone? You seemed angry,” Terra said when she saw me.
I burst into tears. I couldn’t speak, so she held me in her arms and let me cry. Then she took me to the living room and waited until I was ready.
“Was it Grant?” she asked when my tears had finally stopped falling.
I shook my head.
“Okay, when you’re ready you can tell me. No rush. Take your time. You’ve got this, Em.”
I looked at her. I knew my eyes looked wild in shock. The tears were falling again. I was fine with her calling me Em. But not him. Never him.
“It was my father.”
“Your . . . what?”
“My father. Well, at least, that’s what he said.”
“Is it really him?”
“I have no idea. What’s going on Terra? First, my house burns down, then I find out my father has found me again and wants me back in his life. What is happening?”
“Are you going to see him?”
“I hung up on him. He told me to contact him in my own time. He wants to meet up.”
“And how about you? Do you want to see him?”
I thought of my mother and my grandmother and how wonderful they’d been to me my whole life. I thought about the times I’d cried myself to sleep wondering why I didn’t have a father. I thought about the times I’d wished he’d suddenly appear in my life again. I shook my head in confusion.
“I don’t know, Terra. I don’t know.
Chapter Twenty-One
Grant
After work, I decided to head over to the fire station to talk to some of the guys. I’d gotten fairly close to a few of them, especially Zach and Tyrone. They were very similar to me in a lot of ways. Both of them weren’t from Buffalo and had originally come from city life, where they’d both been involved in an office job all day. They were best friends, and they’d one day decided to hit the road and see where it took them. On the way, there was a fire, and they drove to see what was going on. They ended up fighting the fire and then getting offered positions within the department. Ever since then, they’d lived in Buffalo as firefighters and had never looked back. I’d gravitated instantly toward them. They were both of similar age to me and had both been through a lot of rough times growing up. I loved Brady, but I sometimes felt as if I could talk more openly to these guys.
“Yo! Grant!” they said as they called me over.
I walked over and grinned as they handed me a cold beer. I cracked it open and sat down.
“Thanks, man. I need this right now.”
“Pleasure, Grant. Or should I say, Patriot?”
I looked at them in surprise. I hadn’t told anyone other than Emily about my nickname, and the only person that really called me that was Brady. Was he right? Did news really travel that fast in this small town? Did Emily tell Terra who then told someone else?”
“How the hell do you know about that name?” I asked.
Zach laughed and fished out a newspaper. Near the back was an old picture of the motorcycle club. And right near the front was a much younger me, and a much younger Brady. Underneath it were our nicknames in print.
“Where did you get this?” I asked.
“My brother arrived this morning with it. He picked it up at the station somewhere.”
“Patriot, huh? That’s an interesting name.”
“And I didn’t know Brady was called Shotgun,” Tyrone said.
I chuckled. “Well, you caught me out. Everyone who is part of the club gets a nickname. And once you have it, it’s very hard to shake it off. I still call Brady ‘Shotgun’ to this day. It feels more normal for me to call him that than to say ‘Brady,’ to be honest.”
“Wow, so this is a whole other life, huh?”
“Tell me about it,” I said as I looked at the picture. “Feels like a lifetime ago. I still love my bike, though. I miss it. I’ve been meaning to go back and get it. But I think I’ll ditch the outfit. I don’t think full on leather would suit this small town.”
“Are these your other brothers?” Zach asked and pointed to the paper.
I looked and smiled at the familiar faces. “Yep. It’s a big family. And that’s my dad. Everyone at the club calls him Pop. He lives and breathes that club. He also owns a motorcycle shop.”
“And you didn’t want to work with him?”
“Nah. I love my bike, but I never wanted it to be work. To me, it was always a hobby. My brother, Gunner,” I said and pointed to Ian’s face on the paper, “he works there. But it’s not for me.”
“So, what exactly do you want to do then? Work on the ranch?”
“I’m not sure. I like it. But I certainly don’t love it as much as Brady does.”
“Yeah, that place is everything to him. You know, I don’t he needs anything else but that ranch.”
I smiled sadly as I thought about Brady telling me that he didn’t want a family. “Yeah, you’re right about that.”
“So, what about working at the fire station? We could do with another hand here. And we can show you the ropes. You’ve already got lots of training behind you, so I don’t why not?”
“You think so?” I asked. I’d actually been thinking about it a lot in the last couple of days. But I kept changing my mind.
“Oh yeah, I definitely think so. You’re a natural at it. And it would be nice to have you as part of the team. There’s chief over there. Why don’t you go and talk to him? Worth a shot.”
“Yeah, okay. I think I’m going to do it.”
I got up with cheers from the boys as I walked over to the chief.
“What’s all the commotion about?” he asked me.
I looked behind me and chuckled. “Oh, they’re trying to convince me to join the team. They said I had to come and talk to you about it.”
“We
ll, is that what you want to do, Grant?”
I sat down and took a swig of my beer. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to do it. “Yeah, I think so. I mean, I don’t know how much of a need there is for me here, but I figured it was worth asking.”
“Well, here’s the deal. The boys like you, I like you, and you’re damn good at the job. You’ve got a great work ethic and to be honest, we could do with the extra help. I’d love to take you on full time if you’d like. And you’ll be paid like a full-time employee, just like all the rest of the guys. So, why don’t you give it some thought and come back to me? I know you’ll probably want to talk to Brady first.”
I nodded. “Yeah, he’s been really good to me, and I don’t really want to leave him in the lurch. So I’d love the chance to talk to him first.”
“You see, that’s what I like about you, Grant. You take others into consideration. You’re absolutely welcome to work with us. How about you talk to Brady tonight?”
I stood up, shook his hand and promised him that I’d do just that. Then I went over and told the boys. There was lots of hooting and hollering, and everyone seemed to think that this meant I was now part of the team.
“I still need to talk to Brady,” I reminded them.
“Well, what are you waiting for you? Go talk to him now. No point in putting it off.”
I finished my beer, threw it into the can, and headed back home to have a talk with Brady. I needed to do it while I still had the courage. I also needed to figure out what I was going to do if Brady asked me not to do it. He’d been a huge help to me in my transition. But I’d cross that bridge when I spoke to him.
I got home, grabbed another beer out the fridge, and went outside to sit with Brady. He’d ordered pizzas for the two of us, and as we sat outside in the night sky, I realized how happy I was.
“It’s a beautiful night.”
He looked up. “It sure is. You’re in a good mood. Did you go and see the boys?”
I smiled. “Yeah, I did. Actually, there was something that I wanted to talk to you about.”
“There was? Shoot, go for it.”
“Well, they’ve asked me to come and work at the fire department on a full-time basis. I wanted to run it by you first, though. I mean, I don’t want to do it if you need help here.”
He smiled. “What do you want to do?”
“I love it here, I really do. But I think I’ve found what I want to do with my life. And that’s firefighting.”
“You’ve always enjoyed saving people. I know you’re only three years older than me, but I’ve always seen you as this older brother who went out and saved the world.”
I laughed. “You have? I always thought I was a complete failure.”
“That’s what I never got about you. You’re anything but a failure. I think you just lost yourself these last few years. I know how hard it was going from being in the Navy to suddenly working behind a desk. I can’t even imagine how strange that must’ve been for you. I’m glad you came here.”
“I’m glad you gave me the idea in the first place.”
“I think you should take the firefighting job.”
“You do?”
“Of course I do. You’ll be great at it. The ranch is more my thing than it is yours. I can see that. Although, despite that, you’re still one of the best workers we’ve ever had.”
“I enjoyed it.”
“I know you did. Do me a favor, and come and work every now and again with me. I know Harold would be open to you working for extra money.”
I could feel the excitement rushing through me. It was a feeling that I hadn’t felt for a very long time. It finally felt like I had a purpose in life. That was what had been missing. I’d just been going through the motions of the day, rather than living them.
“I’d love that. And I’ll definitely take you up on that offer. I would miss the ranch if I didn’t work here at least a little bit. Maybe I can work here one day a week or something.”
“Sounds great. We can take it as it comes. Why don’t you just work out the rest of the week here? Then you can start with the fire department next week. Having you here made me realize that I needed the extra help. So at least I can use this week to find someone else. A few people have enquired in the past so I don’t think it will be hard to find someone. I’m glad you’re doing something that you really want to do.”
“Thanks, Shotgun.”
“It’s my pleasure, Patriot,” he said, and we grinned at the nicknames. “So, does that mean that you’re staying in Wyoming?”
I looked around and chuckled. “It sure looks like it.”
We sat for a while, just talking and eating our pizza, until we felt drops falling down.
“Uh oh. Here comes the rain. Lucky we finished our pizza,” he said.
We grabbed the boxes and the drinks and hurried inside. I was just about to crack open my final beer for the night when my phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Grant, it’s Emily.”
“Em! This is a nice surprise,” I said. Just hearing her voice made me smile. I couldn’t wait to tell her my decision about the new job. I wondered how much of being with her had swayed my decision to stay.
“Can you come over?”
“Now?” I asked in surprise.
“Yeah. Terra is out at her mom’s again. And I really need you tonight.”
Something about her seemed strange. Sad even.
“Are you okay?”
“I just really want to see you.”
“I’ll be right over.”
I ran upstairs to brush my teeth and grab my coat, then headed out. It was pouring outside, and I was already wet when I got into the car. By the time I got to Terra’s place, the rain was pounding down. I put my coat over my head and ran to the front door and knocked.
“Come in,” Emily said from inside without opening the door.
That’s strange. She didn’t come and open for me.
I opened the door and walked inside.
“I’m in the living room. Just lock the door when you come in,” she said.
I locked the door and chuckled to myself, wondering what she was up to. I stopped abruptly when I walked into the living room and saw that Emily was sitting completely naked on the sofa. Her legs were crossed and she was smiling at me.
“Wow. This is . . .” I gulped. “Nice.”
“No talking. It’s been a rough day, and right now the only thing I want is you inside me,” she said and smiled at me.
“Now that, I can do,” I said and walked up to her, taking off my clothes as I went.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Emily
“I’m going to my mother’s house,” Terra said.
“What? Why? Can’t you stay? Or maybe I can come with?” I said. I wasn’t usually so clingy when it came to people. After all, before this, I’d lived on my own for a very long time. But I didn’t want to be alone that night.
“No, I’m going there so that you can call Grant. Let him come over. And then when you guys have had some time together, call me and I’ll come back. That way you won’t be alone at all.”
I smiled at Terra. “You don’t have to do that. I don’t mind spending the night with you. In fact, I want to.”
“I know. But I think Grant will be able to take your mind off a few things. And anyway, I really do need to see my mom. That part is not a lie. So, you choose. Either you come with me, or you call Grant.”
I was about to tell her that I’d go with her until I thought of Grant. I pictured being his arms and feeling like everything was going to be okay. I smiled.
“I’ll call Grant.”
“Good answer. But, I promise you, Em. You just tell me when he’s gone and I’ll come back. Okay?”
“Okay.”
I waited for her to go before calling Grant. When he said he’d come right over, I decided to take off my clothes. I didn’t feel like talking about what had just happened. The only th
ing that I wanted to do is forget about it. I knew I couldn’t forget about it for forever, but just for that night, I wanted nothing more than to put it out of my mind.
I made sure that the door wasn’t locked, took off my clothes, and sat in the living room. When I heard his car pull up, I breathed a sigh of relief. I’d had a few moments of panic that Terra was going to come back and see me sitting naked in her living room. I would’ve been mortified. We’re best friends, but we’re not that close.
I heard the door knock and told him to come in.
“I’m in the living room. Just lock the door when you come in,”
The door opened, and I heard the latch as he locked it, then he walked into the room and stopped short when he saw me. I’d done the right thing according to the look on his face.
“Wow. This is . . .” he gulped. “Nice.”
“No talking. It’s been a rough day, and right now the only thing I want is you inside me,”
Grant nodded and started walking toward me.
“Lose the clothes, Patriot,” I said.
He looked surprised and then excited, and as he walked, he started taking off his clothes. By the time he reached me, he had nothing on. I was still sitting on the couch, and as he walked up to me, I sat up and pulled him toward me. He was standing in front of me, and already he was hard for me. This is what I wanted. This is what I needed. I put him in my mouth and sucked. I heard him groan and writhe as I took him to the edge of satisfaction. Then I stood up onto the couch so that I was just slightly taller than him.
“Right, I think it’s time we move this upstairs,” I said. I took his hand and led him up the stairs into the spare bedroom.
“So this is where you sleep at night,” he said looking around.
“It is,” I said and smiled. It was nice to have him in my bedroom.
He walked up to me, lifted me up, and placed me gently on the bed. I didn’t want him to be gentle that night. I smiled at him.
“Ever tied a woman up in bed?”
“Actually, I can’t say I have.”
I looked around and found a pair of knee high socks that I got to wear in the winter. I handed them to him.
“These should do,” I said and spread my hands out by the headboard.
Dirty SEAL (A Navy SEAL Romance) (The Maxwell Family) Page 13