The Fall of a Saint
Page 21
But he did not seem to mind. Without a word, he put an arm behind her back and held her, steadying a cup as she drank. He was cradling her close against him, just as she would hold an infant, and looking at her as though she were the most precious thing in the world.
‘Where?’ She leaned up, trying to see the baby. It felt strange. She was weak, but she felt weightless, as if she was floating in a pond.
‘The nurse will bring her to you shortly. But you must rest.’
‘Her?’ He had said daughter. Then he’d called her beautiful.
He was smiling in a way she had not seen before, like a man utterly besotted. ‘Could we, perhaps, name her Eleanor? It was my mother’s name.’
And now, apparently, he was thinking fondly of his mother. God knew why, for they could not have been close. It was strange that he should ask, as though she was to be allowed an opinion. Strange that he should even care, after all the fuss he had made about an heir. ‘You needed a son,’ she reminded him. She looked eagerly towards the door. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to know that little Eleanor was healthy and safe. ‘I will give you one next time. Now let me see my little girl.’
‘You must not speak of a next time,’ he said softly. ‘This was too hard for you. I will not see you suffer again.’
‘How else will we have a boy?’ she said, still staring at the doorway to catch the first glimpse of her daughter.
‘As I told you when I married you, I will find another way. But do not fear for Eleanor. She will be treated like a princess.’
‘Of course she will,’ Maddie agreed.
‘And she shall have both a puppy and a kitten, just as you wished.’
She did not remember wishing for any such thing. But her memory of the past day or so was cloudy. Except for one thing. ‘You said you loved me?’
‘I adore you,’ he said, kissing her hair. ‘You are my life. And that is why I will not risk you again. No more children, Maddie. I could not stand to go through this again.’
She waved the idea away. ‘One child is not enough. Eleanor will want a playmate, or perhaps two or three.’
Michael looked doubtful and opened his mouth as if to refuse her again.
Maddie gave him a stern look. ‘If it bothers you so, next time I will not let you watch. But I mean to do it again. Not today, of course. But in a year or two. It will be much less frightening now that we have done it once.’
‘Shh.’ He laid a hand against her shoulder, pushing her back onto the bed. ‘Do not agitate yourself. You are still weak.’
She tried to sit up again. ‘Not so weak that I will let you cast me off.’
‘I am not casting you off,’ he said patiently, then leaned in and kissed her forehead. ‘I promised you your freedom from the very first. I will not hold you here and make you suffer just so that I might have an heir.’
There was no reasoning with the man. And so she grabbed his dishevelled cravat and dragged his face to hers for a kiss. For one who would forswear her company for her own good, he was not fighting very hard to resist her now. His mouth tasted salty, like sweat and tears, and he did not kiss at all like a proper duke. Instead, he responded with all the joy in his heart. She liked it very well. ‘If you want no more children, we will not have the fun of making one,’ she said when she was through with him.
‘But you will be so busy with the renovations that you will hardly have time for me.’
‘I will?’ she said absently, touching his beautiful lips with her fingertip.
‘You came into my office, raving about the need to tear down the walls and start afresh. It was after you turned out your precious Richard.’
‘Richard was not the least bit precious,’ she admitted. ‘Richard was an ass. He took horrible advantage of me, then acted as though I owed him for the privilege. He was quite horrible and I wasted years of my life waiting for him.’
‘And that is why I found you,’ Michael said. ‘So he was not totally without worth.’
‘But I did not know what a devil he was until I married a saint.’
‘I am not a saint,’ he reminded her, still frustrated by the label.
‘Of course not, Michael. You are as prone to mistakes as the rest of us. Because you are flesh and blood.’ And what glorious flesh it was. Even the exhaustion of giving birth had not totally dulled her desire for the man leaning over her bed.
‘And I was not raving when I came into your office,’ she added. ‘I was merely expressing my opinions adamantly, because I was frustrated. And in pain.’
His expression softened immediately when she mentioned pain, and he rubbed his face against their clasped hands.
Who knew the man had such a weakness for her comfort? ‘It was far more difficult for you to watch the pain than for me to experience it,’ she said, and gave him a sympathetic look. ‘And really, you shouldn’t have been there. Men are too delicate for childbirth. It is why God has given the job to women.’
The idea shocked him to silence.
So she leaned forward and captured his lips, turning the contact into another delicious kiss. When she leaned back to look at his face, she was reminded yet again what a handsome man her husband was. And how lucky she was to have that Adonis wrapped around her little finger.
Then the nurse brought their daughter to them. And Michael had been right. She was the most beautiful girl that Maddie had ever seen, with deep blue eyes and a wisp of blonde hair. ‘She looks like you,’ Maddie whispered. ‘And Eleanor is a lovely name. Now that I have her, my life is almost perfect.’
‘Almost?’ He pretended to sigh. ‘How will I manage, now that I have two ladies to make unreasonable demands upon me?’
‘You needn’t worry about one of us, for your daughter will not even talk for a year or two.’ Maddie smiled. ‘But you did promise me that I could have whatever I wanted if I married you.’
‘I did,’ he agreed. ‘And what do you command of me now, your Grace?’
‘I want your heart, for the rest of my life.’
‘You have it, my love.’
She ran her hand up his chest and let that finger slide beneath his neckcloth until she found a bit of bare skin to touch. ‘And your body, as well.’
He swallowed nervously, but he nodded.
‘And I want you to give me a house full of children, who all look like you.’ Then she kissed him again to make him forget what an enormous house it was.
* * * * *
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ISBN-13: 9781460327579
THE FALL OF A SAINT
Copyright © 2014 by Christine Merrill
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