When she found Josephine downstairs having breakfast, in very high spirits having slept well and late, her friend knew at once that something was amiss.
‘I hope you’re all set for a morning’s fun. I have that lovely surprise booked for us first, then I thought we could take an afternoon mosey around the old neighbourhood where Jorge and I stayed?’
Pepper sat down more heavily than she had intended.
‘Sounds great.’
‘Darling.’ Josephine’s tone was determinedly breezy ‘Why don’t you simply call him and get it over with?’
‘Call who?’ Pepper attempted to sound surprised.
‘There is no fooling an old fool,’ Josephine snipped. ‘I know a lover’s tiff when I see it etched across someone’s face. Trust me, if the two of you have it out sooner rather than later, it won’t have time to fester.’
Pepper pulled a face.
‘Come on now,’ Josephine crowed. ‘Off you toddle.’
‘But I––’
‘SHOO!’
With a drawn-out sigh that would have won gold at the Grumpy Teenager Olympics, Pepper heaved herself up and took her phone outside into the hotel courtyard, her shoulders drooping as the heat settled across them.
Taking a deep breath, she called Finn.
One ring. Two rings. Five rings.
He wasn’t answering.
Instead of going to voicemail, the call ended abruptly, as if someone at the other end had cancelled it. Pepper now felt even worse than she had five minutes ago. She couldn’t understand what was happening, and whether or not she should be concerned for his safety. A life with no Finn in it was impossible to comprehend – Pepper felt sick at the mere thought. But it was unfair of him, ignoring her like this. If she had not heard anything by the evening, she decided she would have no choice but to call Freunde and ask Otto or Clara for help.
Feeling slightly less despairing now that she had a plan of sorts, Pepper returned to the table.
‘Better?’ Josephine arched an enquiring brow.
‘Yes and no.’ Pepper put her phone into her bag. ‘Let’s not talk about it any more. Now, tell me more about this cunning plan of yours.’
Josephine grinned. Her expression was even more mischievous than it usually was.
‘Go and fill up at the buffet,’ she urged. ‘Then we can get going.’
‘Oh my God – you didn’t?’
Pepper stared at the shiny red Vespas that were parked at a jaunty angle by the kerb, her mouth falling open as Josephine tittered with amusement.
‘I am afraid I did. This was how Jorge and I used to get around the city, except in those days the scooters were very different from these beautiful beasts, of course.’
Pepper could not be sure if she was referring to their vehicles of choice for the hour-long tour, or the two young men that would be driving them.
‘We will start along the beach,’ her guide, Tomas, told her, handing Pepper a helmet and helping her to adjust the chin strap. ‘Then go around to the north, stop for some photos, and back along all the best roads for seeing our sites.’
‘Er, gracias,’ she said. Glancing across to check on Josephine, she found that her friend was already in the pillion position, both legs and arms wrapped snugly around Ignacio, who was a few years older and a good foot taller than his colleague.
‘Are we ready, ladies?’ he called, as Pepper hopped onto the smooth leather seat. Unsure of where to put her hands, she felt around behind her, only for Tomas to indicate his waist.
‘Hold me here, please,’ he instructed. ‘It is easier for me to balance – and safer for you.’
‘OK.’ Pepper turned even redder than the paintwork. She barely had time to register the fact that her hands were now full of young Spanish man before they were off, zooming along the narrow side street in a burst of such unexpected power that Pepper found herself gripping Tomas even tighter.
Ignacio and Josephine led the way, and Pepper shut her eyes in fright as the two men weaved them out into the traffic at speed, dodging cars and tooting their horns at any tourist who dared get in their way. When she heard Tomas cough as if he was trying to catch his breath, she relaxed her arms a fraction and tried her best to remain as still as possible.
Once she got over the fear factor, Pepper started to realise that it was actually quite a fun way to travel, and what made her even happier was the sight of her friend up ahead, her arms brazenly outstretched and her head thrown back, clearly loving every second. When they pulled up beside one another at a set of traffic lights not far from all the beach bars, Josephine reached across and squeezed Pepper’s hand.
‘Isn’t this blooming marvellous?’ she yelled, as both Ignacio and Tomas revved their engines in anticipation of a green light. ‘This is really living!’
Pepper laughed – it was impossible not to – but as soon she did they hurtled off once again and the warm wind flooded into her open mouth, along with one or two insects. As Pepper coughed and spluttered, she heard a great whoop coming from her friend up ahead, and her chokes dissolved into laughter.
The sky today was an uncompromising shade of the clearest blue, the sun within it bright and ringed with gold. The deeper they ventured into the city, the more there was to see, and when Ignacio and Tomas pulled over so they could take photos from up behind Park Güell, the view made Pepper fall into a silent state of awe. From all the way up here, Barcelona could almost be quiet. The traffic was muted, the canopies of the trees turning the streets from grey to green and the people were merely dots – stitches on a tapestry.
‘Do you want to swap?’ Josephine asked slyly, throwing a look in her driver’s direction. ‘Ignacio is very funny – keeps telling me jokes about the English that I can’t for the life of me seem to work out. I have been laughing along with him, of course.’
Pepper chuckled. ‘I’m very happy with Tomas,’ she assured her. ‘He is a strong and silent type, which suits me just fine.’
‘Shall we get a photograph with them?’ Josephine asked, beckoning the two men over with an enthusiastic hand. Ignacio, who was the tallest, kindly offered to take the selfie, and Pepper rested her head against her friend’s, knowing this would be yet another moment she would never forget. As she clambered back behind Tomas, however, she could not help but think what Finn would say if he could see her, and how happy he would be to hear she had spent the morning with her legs wrapped around another man. A really childish part of her wanted to send him the selfie, but she knew that was the disgruntled side of her worry talking. This was Finn. He was different. She had to believe that if he wasn’t getting back to her, then he must have a very good reason.
Pepper told herself to put the subject away and concentrated instead on how glorious it felt to have the wind rushing through the ends of her hair, and the sun beating down on her bare legs. Thank heavens she had worn shorts today instead of a dress – flashing the people of Barcelona her pants was definitely not something she wanted to tick off the bucket list.
The next time they stopped at a set of lights, Tomas reached down and moved Pepper’s hand from his waist to the moped throttle, putting his own over the top.
‘When I say,’ he said loudly, ‘you pull – yes?’
What was this, Carry On Vespas?
‘Yes – er, OK.’
The light turned green, Tomas said ‘now’, and Pepper eased her hand backwards on the handle, feeling the roar of the engine vibrating through her fingers.
‘Bravo!’ yelled Tomas. ‘Now you are driving.’
Although it was not quite Michelle Pfeiffer in Grease 2, Pepper felt very pleased with herself.
For a few exhilarating minutes, she had been the one in control, and it had felt so damn great.
Chapter 36
It was with slightly bandy legs that she and Josephine ambled through the Barri Gòtic quarter that afternoon. While Gaudí’s various haunts had felt like other worlds, the cobblestone streets and Gothic churches down here transpor
ted them to another time.
As a city, Barcelona was grander than Lisbon, but it was no less fascinating to behold, and as they strolled under stone arches, past ruined cathedrals, lively water fountains and café tables buried under a sea of tanned, sprawling limbs, Pepper felt more and more overwhelmed by a need to capture what she was seeing. Her camera was not enough; it would only tell half the story. She needed a pencil and paper, some paints and an easel.
Seemingly immune to the steadily rising heat of the day, Josephine powered through the lanes as fast as her stick would allow, exclaiming in delight every time she saw a landmark that she recognised.
‘Jorge and I kissed on this wall!’ she would cry, sinking down and pressing a hand to the stone. ‘Do you know, we never let go of each other’s hands – barely ever. It was as if the two of us were conjoined, for heaven’s sake, so helplessly infatuated that we could not bear to let go, even for a moment.’
‘That’s what love should feel like,’ Pepper told her, picturing herself and Finn, wrapped up in each other’s arms as he led her through Hamburg. Josephine, however, had not replied, merely peered closely at Pepper, as if trying to work her out.
‘This is one of the prettiest squares in the city,’ she announced a little while later. ‘Plaça Reial. Of course, it was far less populated with all these fancy restaurants when Jorge and I used to while away the hours here – the only other creatures we ever saw were other artists. Oh, and the pigeons of course.’
‘I like these streetlamps,’ Pepper said of the two posts flanking a grand, central fountain.
‘I guessed you might,’ Josephine said appreciatively. ‘Gaudí again. Jorge sketched them, if I remember rightly. The two of you would so have got along.’
‘We still could,’ Pepper tempered lightly.
Josephine’s face had been thrown into shadow by one of the square’s many palm trees, and her expression gave nothing away.
‘Maybe.’ She looked away towards the edge of the square. ‘Now, shall we walk beneath the porticoes? The stonework is simply divine.’
It was many hours later that Pepper was finally able to persuade her to sit and rest for a while, and even when they had located a free table tucked away along a narrow lane, Josephine refused to get a pot of tea, opting instead for a jug of sangria and insisting that Pepper share.
‘I am pulling the Parkinson’s card on this one,’ she said, waving away Pepper’s refusal. ‘You have to do as I say, because I am old and dying.’
‘Oi! Less of that, please.’
‘We have earned it,’ she proclaimed. ‘And how often are you in a beautiful Spanish city, with nowhere to be and nothing to do except feel the sunshine on your bare toes and enjoy a little late-afternoon tipple?’
‘Fair point.’ Pepper accepted a glass. Then, after two more, she felt brave enough to try calling Finn, screwing up her face when it went straight to voicemail. His recorded message was in English rather than German, and Pepper wondered if that was for her benefit, or something to do with his work. Perhaps now, she thought numbly, she might never get an opportunity to ask.
‘Do you want to talk about it, darling?’ Josephine raised a braceleted arm and shooed away a hovering mosquito.
Pepper shook her head.
‘Maybe later,’ she said. ‘I want to hear more about you and Jorge.’
The sun continued to drift lazily across the sky as they sat, sharing stories and a second jug of sangria as the city edged its way from daytime to dusk. Pepper was torn between a desire to bask in the moment and a need to give in to the rising tide of unease that was beginning to course through her at the thought of something being wrong with Finn. Was that simply the hand that life had dealt her? Was she destined to lose everyone she held dear – first Bethan, then Finn, and soon Josephine? It felt horribly as if the happiness that had been dangled tantalisingly close to her was now about to be ripped away.
When Josephine giddily suggested a third jug, Pepper scraped back her chair.
‘First, we must find some food,’ she said, even though her stomach felt as shrunken and gnarled as a walnut. ‘Then we can talk about more alcohol.’
Eight on a Sunday evening was apparently a far more popular time to eat than on Saturdays, and it took a further hour of wandering before the two of them found a place to eat. On first glance, the little restaurant Cal Pep did not look like much, with its long counter, low ceiling and laminated menus, but everyone inside was Spanish, which according to Josephine was a very positive sign.
The two of them sat up on tall stools and sipped cava served in small tumblers. Their server – a thickset man in a sauce-splattered white apron – shook his head when they began asking questions about the food, telling them briskly that he would bring them a selection of his own choosing.
‘I like him,’ Josephine said approvingly. ‘A man that takes charge of a situation – not many of those left.’
Pepper thought of Finn, and how content she had been to let him take the lead when she was in Hamburg. He was a ‘take charge’ type of man. Well, perhaps except where errant bats were concerned. Remembering the incident now, she relayed the story to Josephine, who laughed so much that cava came out of her nose.
‘This Samuel chap sounds fabulous!’ she enthused. ‘Why haven’t you introduced us yet?’
‘I will when we get back to Suffolk,’ Pepper promised. ‘I’ll do a meal for you both or something.’
‘Speaking of which . . .’
Their tapas arrived, the plates piling up until every free space on the countertop was filled. There were still-sizzling Padron peppers zebra-striped from the grill, melt-in-the-mouth frittata oozing butter, a rich and creamy Russian salad, thinly sliced chips crunchy with salt, warm bread painted with fresh tomatoes and dripping with olive oil, delicately flavoured seabass fillets and a thick, meaty sausage served over hot, spicy beans.
‘Get gobbling,’ ordered Josephine, when Pepper made no move to begin.
‘It’s not every day you get to eat food like this, you know.’
She was right. Pepper scooped up a forkful of frittata, her eyes widening as her taste buds came instantly to life. She hadn’t been able to face eating much at breakfast that morning, and now found she was starving. As the delicious dishes rapidly disappeared, Pepper began to feel more human again, less wrung out than she had for the past few hours.
‘Thank you,’ she said to Josephine, as their satisfied server removed the final empty plate and topped up their glasses with more cava. ‘I needed that.’
‘A full stomach equals a full mind.’ Josephine tapped the side of her head. ‘You’ve put some fuel in the tank, and now you can think more coherently.’
Pepper picked up her paper napkin and began shredding it methodically into pieces.
‘I’m worried about Finn,’ she said. And then, because she had run out of excuses of why not to, she told Josephine what had been going on.
‘I understand why you’re so concerned,’ was the first thing she said, then she pondered for a moment. ‘The way I see it,’ she said, ‘Finn is a straight-talking sort. I can’t see him simply ignoring you, apropos of nothing.’
‘That’s what I thought,’ Pepper said dully. ‘Just a day or so ago, he was all set to come and live with me, but now that feels like it won’t happen. I know, I know!’ Pepper held up both her hands as she saw the look on Josephine’s face. ‘I’m catastrophising – but I can’t help it.’
She groaned loudly, her head rocking back until she was staring at the fluorescent strip lighting on the ceiling.
‘Everything was so perfect, and now this. It feels so bloody unfair!’
‘Welcome to life, darling.’ Josephine sighed. ‘A series of complicated conundrums, one after the other. I am almost twice your age, and they still appear to be coming thick and fast.’
‘I hate that you have to leave Aldeburgh,’ Pepper said then. It was the first time she had admitted it out loud, and for a horrible second, she thought Jose
phine might cry.
‘Oh, darling,’ she said eventually, drawing in a long, shuddering breath. ‘I hate that I have to leave you, too.’
‘I’ll be OK.’ Pepper sniffed. ‘I’ll muddle through – we both will.’
‘Just don’t forget that you have choices.’ Josephine was looking at her earnestly now. ‘If things with Finn are not destined to be, then you can still take charge of your future. You don’t need a man to dictate the pace, or the progress.’
‘What if he’s changed his mind?’ More bits of desiccated napkin fluttered to the floor. ‘What if he doesn’t want to move to Aldeburgh after all?’
Josephine sipped her cava, her eyes not leaving Pepper’s.
‘All you really need to ask yourself is: do I want to be with Finn for the long haul?’ she said. ‘If the answer is yes, then you must do everything you can to make it work, even if that means making some big changes to your life.’
‘But I can’t.’ Pepper rubbed at her eyes in agitation. ‘I can’t leave Suffolk.’
‘Can’t?’ Josephine raised a single eyebrow. ‘Or won’t?’
It was dark by the time they left Cal Pep, but the streetlights cast a marmalade glow across the cobbles. The air carried the rich scent of a hundred kitchen windows propped open, and notes of music danced past them from bars that were only now beginning to usher in the night.
‘Do you know, I think I may have overdone it a tad,’ remarked Josephine, wobbling unsteadily on her walking stick. With her frizzy grey hair brushed out and her long green trousers dusting the cobbles, she reminded Pepper of a dandelion.
‘No, we are not walking back,’ Pepper said firmly, stepping in front of Josephine as her friend attempted to scuttle past the waiting line of taxis.
‘Bossy boots!’ Josephine blew a friendly raspberry at Pepper as they slid across the backseat.
It didn’t take them long to reach the hotel, but instead of waiting for Pepper to pay the driver, Josephine opened her door on the traffic side of the car and clambered out.
Hello, Again Page 20