by Chloe Adler
“They’ve always treated me like a little kid.” I rub my hands over the vinyl again, liking the way the rubber feels against my palms. “I guess the last time they saw me I was a kid, but I wasn’t a little kid. And now no matter what, that’s how they’ll always see me. Even after I left and grew up and tried to find my own way. You know?”
“Oh yes. Firsthand, sweetheart. I’ve been there . . . with my father.” Her violet eyes are sad. She’s no longer looking at me but staring at the far wall.
I reach out and squeeze her hand.
She turns back to me and offer me a smile. “Go on, please.” She moves her hand to my back and holds it there.
“I’m the youngest and for so much of my life I blamed my brother Rhys for our circumstances. That was so much easier than knowing the truth.” I stop and touch the amulet around my neck. Ever since Iphi gave it to me, it’s been like an anchor back to the present, reminding me of my humanity. “It’s like I’m still the thorn in their side. The dirty little kid, getting in their way. The one they have to always look out for. It’s the reason I left them when I did. I was so sick of being treated that way and now that I’m back . . .” He shakes his head. “It’s like I can’t escape my past.”
She rubs my back. “No one can.”
I glance over at her and then away. “And now they’re all one big happy family, just like they were before, and I’m ostracized, a misfit, a nuisance, just like I was before. They’ve pushed me out.”
“You’re right,” says Burgundy.
I look back at her, my vision blurring. “What?”
“You’re right because you’re allowing yourself to be pushed out, Nolan. You’re expecting it and you’re letting them. Maybe when you were all younger they did feel that way. I’m sure they were protective of you, that’s normal. Then you show back up and you’re playing for the wrong team. You’re being led around by some crazy demon who’s obsessed with the girl they love.”
“What am I supposed to do? I’m so lost.” If this amazingly gorgeous woman wasn’t sitting next to me half naked, I’d definitely cry right now. Suck it up, Nolan. I screw my eyes shut and push back the tears. When I open them she’s looking at me with pure compassion. Her eyes are soft, her mouth’s slightly parted and her lips are very, very wet. I can’t tear my eyes from them.
“You’re supposed to do the right thing,” she says. “You’re supposed to make an effort. You need to win back their trust. In a lot of ways you need to start over. They don’t really know who you are now and vice versa. If you want your pack back, you’re the one who’s going to have to do the work.”
She leans in and kisses the side of my face. My body leans into hers and I let it. She cups the side of my cheek and turns my head to face hers. Bringing a lithe finger to her mouth, she wraps her plump lips around the tip—and sucks. I sway, mesmerized, like a cobra to her snake charmer. When she removes her finger it glistens and she runs it down along the scars on my face.
“Please don’t.” I try to turn my head away from her but she holds it in place.
“You’re a handsome man, Nolan, even with your scars. You may be broken but that doesn’t mean you’re unlovable.” She pushes her lips into mine and I let her, sighing into her mouth, my arms winding around her back and tangling in her thick, dark hair.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Dominic
We all agree that Iphi shouldn’t be alone tonight, performing in the circus tent on the pier. What if whatever protection spell she cast wears off? When Rhys was possessed, he was still able to get close to her at times, presumably when the warding spell had faded. Even Iphi admits the ward is still experimental and nowhere near as permanent as Aurelia can make such things. But we also agree that there’s no way she’d allow any of us keep an eye on her, so here I am hiding in the back. I hope it’s far enough away from her that her empathic powers won’t pick up on me.
Even though I basically threw her away like she didn’t matter to me. She must know how I really feel though, how all of us feel. But how can we risk the loss of our pack? She has sisters. Surely she’d never let anything or anyone come between them.
The lights dim and Alexis strides out on stage. Tonight she’s on fire, not literally, but she smokes up the stage with her juggling and fire-hoop routine. If only I’d been able to just close my eyes and heart to Iphigenia and follow through on Alexis’s interest the other night . . . but who am I kidding? There’s only one woman for me.
So here I am, hiding in the back, watching Iphi from afar, just like I did when we first came to the Edge looking for the girl Nolan was obsessed with. How many nights have I spent hiding here in plain sight, watching her perform when I was on surveillance duty? It’s as though I’ve come full circle. Here I am back at the exact same spot again, only now everything is burning to ash, just like Alexis’s hoop.
Yes so much has changed, too much for me to go back to the way things were, before Iphi was truly a part of my life, embedded in my core like a meteor that’s fallen to Earth, digging its way into the ground upon it’s arrival. Like that meteor, Iphi has changed the landscape of my heart forever. I can’t keep sacrificing myself for my brother’s happiness. It’s time to acknowledge what I truly want and it’s time for my brothers to figure out a way to keep our family together. Why does that burden always belong to me? Oh right, because I’m the one who’s always taken it on. Iphi was right. Sacrifice is my platform. I always tell my patients, you can’t expect people not to take what you give them. It’s time I take my own advice.
Alexis rides off on a unicycle. I don’t remember that from the last performance. A shorter man in spandex and glitter appears. Rodrigo, the stage manager, de-ghoulified, thanks to Iphi. Apparently there was a whole contingent of ghouls surrounding the police station during Iphi’s showdown, we found out later, presumably poised to break in and help their brethren spring a trap for her. But she turned the tables on them with her spell. And now twelve people, not just three, get to go home to their loved ones. She is one powerful witch.
“And now, ladies and gentleman, children and pets, flying spacemen and deep sea creatures, Signum and humans alike, it’s time to put your hands together and salute our magical aerial acrobat, the Flying Seraphim!”
The crowd ignites, hooting and clapping as the curtain parts, and Iphi, suspended halfway up the silk fabric, looks like she’s sitting on a couch, doing her nails. The crowd applauds and laughter fills the tent, reaching to every darkened corner.
Iphi looks up like she’s just noticed she’s suspended twenty feet in the air in front of an audience. She drops the nail file and it clanks to the floor, setting off small indoor fireworks when it hits. More cheers. She looks out into the audience as if blaming them for her clumsiness, and a hush descends. We all wait with bated breath while she twists and spins, climbs and falls. The crowd is silent as she performs and the only thing missing are real wings. Angel wings. Geez, I sure am smitten. I’ve never been so spun out over anyone before. I know I should stay away but I can’t. I have to see her.
After the show I make my way to her dressing room. Passing other performers on the way, I congratulate them. When I finally get to Iphi, nerves rack my system. What if she turns me away? Knocking twice, I wait outside, bouncing on my feet.
“Come in.”
I open the door a crack and peek inside. “It’s me, Dom. Can I talk to you for a minute?”
She’s perched on a stool in front of a mirror, fixing her hair. Her eyes meet mine in the glass and my heart stops. It just hangs, heavy in my chest like a burned-out star. Her soft eyebrows rise to her hairline.
“Dom? Did you just get here?” She swivels around to face me.
“No, I was here for the whole show. You were amazing.”
“Come in.” She gestures me toward a bank of chairs on the left wall.
I pull the door partly shut behind me and cross over to the chairs, my gaze never leaving her. “I wanted to apologize.”
“Okay. But what on earth for?”
I seat myself in a chair on the end. “I can’t choose a woman over my brothers.”
That was apparently the wrong thing to say. “I didn’t ask you to.” She turns back to the mirror and gathers up a few loose locks.
“But you’re not just any woman.”
“What am I?”
“You’re everything to me, Iphi. You’re sunshine and starlight. You’re the celestial body that I revolve around. You’re kindness and compassion.” I splay my hands in my lap. “You’re hope for mankind.”
She barks out a laugh.
“Too cheesy? You’re right, I amend that last one. You’re hope . . . for me”
“So?” Her smile dies and she turns to the mirror again. She pins up another curl, adjusts it and repeats the process.
I stand up and walk over to her, kneeling at her feet. “I want you. I want to make it work with us, all of us. You’re the boss here. I’ll share you with my brothers if they ever come around.”
She stops fussing with her hair and looks down at me. “And if they don’t come around?”
I sigh and adjust my glasses. “I’ll work on them. For us. For all of us.”
“What about my secret? My gift?”
I shrug. “What about it? I won’t tell the others. It’s not my secret to share.”
“And you accept it?”
I reach my hands up and place them on her lap, face up. She puts hers in them. “Knowing your vulnerability makes me want you even more. I think I fell in love with you when you fainted in your dressing room at the beginning of the season and I’ve been falling harder and harder ever since.”
“Why then?”
“You didn’t hide your true self, from us or from your subconscious. Your mother’s words hurt you that night and you didn’t hold yourself back. Your body just responded and you let it.”
“Girls in need turn you on?”
I squeeze her hands in mine. “You turn me on. Seriously though, I don’t look at that moment as you being in need. I look at it as the complete opposite—you taking care of yourself.”
She sighs, clearly not convinced.
I straighten on my knees. “You are the strongest, least dependent woman I know. You give to everyone else, yet you’re learning to take care of yourself and put yourself first. I admire you, and not just because I’m in love with you.”
She raises our joined hands to her lips, kissing one of my hands, then the other. Then she wraps her lips around a forefinger, sucking gently. I groan. Her eyes lock on mine while she runs her tongue along the tip of the forefinger on the other hand and then sucks the entire finger into her mouth, pulling up and back like it’s my cock. Of course that responds too, growing painfully uncomfortable in my jeans in mere seconds. She stops, my fingertip still in her mouth, then gives it a playful nibble, smiling down at me.
“Oh God, Iphi.”
She pivots forward, pulling my finger from her mouth, and presses her lips to mine, dropping my hands and wrapping her arms around me. Mine cradle her in turn, all of their own accord. After a few seconds she breaks the kiss but keeps her arms around me. “Promise me you’ll never tell anyone my secret.”
“I promise. Never. I would never do that.” My voice is breathless and I stretch toward her lips again.
“I love you, Dominic,” she whispers.
“I’ve always loved you.” I stand and wrap my arms underneath her. She lets me lift and carry her to the couch on the other wall where I place her down and climb on top.
Rhys
Even though we all agreed that Dom would keep an eye on Iphi tonight, Cas and I just couldn’t stay away. We hid in the shadows from her and from Dom. Her performance was enchanting.
After the last curtain call we fought the throngs of circus goers to see her backstage. We assumed, incorrectly, that Dom had left.
Her dressing room door is ajar, and we both peek inside.
Dominic is straddling Iphi on the couch, one of her legs spills over the side, her heel resting on the floor. Their lips are locked and his hand moves between her legs.
Oh shit. I look away quickly—but not because some ugly green monster is ready to snap off my brother’s head. No, the truth is far stranger. I’m . . . happy for him. And, okay, yeah, a little turned on.
Okay, that’s unexpected. Before, just imagining Iphi with another man was enough to drop the bottom out of my stomach. But now, before my eyes, it’s . . . Well, it’s not another man, is it? It’s Dom. The man practically raised me, along with Thorn. He took care of me, protected me, patched up my scrapes and showered me with love. He’s not some faceless, nameless man engaged in who-knows-what lurid acts with the woman I love. It’s two of the people I care about most in the world loving each other. And I know it’s a love as big as this tent. There’s room for me and Caspian under it too.
So why shouldn’t he be with our girl? Their tryst is beautiful and her sighs and little moans explode like fireworks in my heart. None of this is what I imagined happening. I look at Caspian, anticipating anger or hurt, but nope. He’s smiling. And when he catches mine, they grow into ear-to-ear grins.
“Let’s let the lovebirds have their fun,” he whispers in my ear and we tiptoe away.
Caspian
Rhys and I find a window seat at Confections, grab some dessert and are just digging in when someone taps on the glass outside and we both look up, startled.
“Well speak of . . .” says Rhys and waves them inside.
“What are you guys doing here?” asks Iphi, sitting down next to me.
“The same thing our bro Dom was doing,” I say as he squeezes in next to Rhys.
Dom raises his eyebrows at me.
“Well . . . not exactly the same thing, dude,” I say to him and then turn to Iphi, “but we were watching you perform.”
“You were?” Iphi claps her hands together and then reaches for my fork and takes a bite of pie. “All three of you were in the audience tonight?”
We exchange glances and then slowly nod. Yup. “Iphi.”
She looks over at me.
“Rhys and I went to your dressing room a bit ago.”
She reddens and drops the fork on the table.
“It’s okay,” says Rhys quickly.
“More than okay,” I add.
“We didn’t spy.”
“As soon as we saw you two making out, we left.”
“You saw us?” Dom’s nostrils flare.
“Easy, buddy.” Rhys pats his shoulder. “You guys left the door open. Besides, the only thing that crossed both of our minds was how we could join in to help Iphi reach an orgasm.”
“Oh my.” Iphi’s face burns red, all the way to her ears, and she pops to her feet.
Oh no, she’s not getting away now. I reach out and grab her hand before she can scamper off. “What we’re trying to say is that we want to try sharing you, properly, on your terms.”
“Oh? Oh!” She sits back down, the crimson fading to a pretty pink.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Thorn
I wait for Nolan at the bar and when he leaves the sex rooms in the back, he looks more relaxed than I’ve seen him in years. No surprise there. The guy finally got laid and I bet it was amazing. There’s no doubt that woman knows exactly what she’s doing! He stops at the bar and nods at me. I hop on his shoulder and away we go. This is new for both of us, kind of like the tables have been turned. Here he is, carrying me in my shift instead of the other way around.
He walks through town and out toward the pier, on Discovery Highway. When he gets to the first stairwell leading down to the beach, he takes it. My stomach rumbles when a plump green bug captures my attention and I fly off to investigate. Landing on a tree branch, I stalk the critter as it buzzes among the leaves. Come to papa. Snap.
Dinner achieved, I peer down the beach, looking for Nolan. At first I can’t see him; it’s so dark out, the moon is a mere crescent in the sky. Instead, I follow
his scent.
He stops partway down the beach and plops down in the sand, staring out at the ocean. He looks content enough, if a tad mopey, and I’m distracted by another delectable insect. Though the human part of my brain tells me to leave it, the lizard part is all hunger, all the time. I’m speeding toward the critter when the sudden whoosh of an ocean wave, a pounding roar like a thunderclap, catches my attention. I turn midair back to Nolan, hovering.
A crest of water has appeared before him, like a wall rising from the ocean floor. Nolan scoots back in the sand like a startled crab, trying to get away from it. A whirling shape of grayish white appears in the center. Inside, geometric patterns spin at a dizzying speed followed by a whirring noise like the sound of a helicopter. Soon a portal opens and out steps a massive beast with horns and glinting red eyes. My entire life, I didn’t think demons were real. I mean, sure we kept calling whatever it was making ghouls a demon, but we didn’t mean it!
I flap backward, shoving against the air. I do not want to get too close. Pointed yellow teeth in double rows line the upper and lower cavities of its maw in an expression that no one would mistake for a smile. The swirling hole widens, exposing even more of the beast within as though he’s standing atop the water like the Earth’s savior. But this is no savior.
“Nolan, look how you’ve upset me.” He widens his arms, which are so massive I wonder if he’s an actual giant. “I took you in. Gave you a home. This is how you’ve repaid me?”
Nolan’s on his feet, backing down the beach. “Let me go. I can’t serve you anymore. I’ve made your ghouls. I’ve spent enough of my life in your servitude.”
What home? What servitude? Clearly Nolan’s been holding out on us. He said he didn’t remember much of his time before Iphi, but the douchecanoe just couldn’t be straight with us. Probably afraid we’d kick him out again if he told us the truth. I don’t know whether to smack him or hug him or set his eyebrows on fire.